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submale010

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I have written down some random thoughts and facts. This is probably the easiest way to get to know something about me. I have a Master's level education and am very much the boy next door, looks and otherwise. Just the sub boy next door with some kink. Some may find these writings interesting. Some may find them amusing. And some may find them a cure for insomnia. I had dreams of submission when I was very young – like in single digits. I just didn’t know what they meant. I first saw the images of bondage in comic books and wanted to act those scenes out. Upon hitting puberty, I realized where the submissive dreams would materialize. I would tie myself up in elaborate ways, pretending it was done by a female. In high school years I would penetrate myself – I wanted to know what that felt like, pretending a female was using me. At a party, a girl and myself began to go at it in plain site. I don’t know how that started, but within a minute I was orally servicing her. Not asking for her to do the same or intercourse. I just immediately did that. After a bar hookup in college, a girl jumped me in her bedroom. She ripped off my shorts and briefly serviced me orally. She then pushed me back on the bed and forced herself on top of me to service her. I didn’t even think to offer resistance and immediately complied. I was worried I wouldn’t satisfy. She then mounted me for intercourse, and as she did so wrapped her legs around mine, grabbed my wrists and held them outstretched above my head – effectively pinning me. When I attempted to move my hands so I could touch her, she immediately and forcefully pinned them back. When I attempted to move my hands again, she again pinned them back. Seeing how easily I could be controlled, she said “I could tie you up so easily.” I meekly said ‘OK”. Later she produced some shoe laces and wrapped them around my wrists, but we were both pretty hammered so this didn’t pan out. I was hoping it would. After a second bar hookup with the same girl a few months later, I sort of invited myself back to her place. She didn’t object. She wanted to finish watching a movie so I watched it with her on the couch. When it was over, she turned the TV off, turned to me, and started sucking my fingers one by one. Wow. She then stood and started walking toward her bedroom, saying “come here”. Once in her bedroom, she matter of factly told me to take off my clothes, which I naturally did. Nothing kinky took place here, it is just the way she ordered me around. And I just complied. From time to time I have tied myself up. In my twenties I would attempt self-spanking and other things. I once gave myself a spanking, afterward lit up and placed a candle where it could drip on my behind and tied myself, pretending a female was tormenting me. I dated an older woman for a while. The first time we got to sexual activity, the first thing I did was orally service her. I never thought of anything else initially. In the days before the internet was widespread, the only porno I would buy was Femdom related. I rented Femdom videos. Since the internet has become common everywhere, I have realized the only porno I look at is Femdom related. Not intercourse, not receiving oral pleasure. Not that I don’t like those things. When I had an AOL account, I would repeatedly go to Femdom chat rooms. Often I would be IM’d by Femdoms. I even had a few phone conversations with some. Throughout my life, women have openly made comments about spanking me, tying me, and having their way with me with a dildo. These have happened at work. The secretary at my first full-time job (I was 23) would come into my work area with dominant stances, such as putting her fists on her hips and glaring at me. She would say things like “What are you doing? What are you into now? When will you be finished?” in a very forceful, demanding way. One more than one occasion, while I was reaching across a table (and therefore bent over) she would slap my behind, even rubbing her hand over it. In plain sight. One time I threw a wadded up piece of paper into a garbage can in her office. It missed. She crossed her legs, put one fist on her hips, pointed at the floor, and ordered me to “get down on your hands and knees and crawl over here and pick that up with your teeth!.” I was too shy and timid to do anything but just stand there. Someone else entered the room and I just left. I secretly had hoped that we would be alone in the office, maybe late one day, and she would force her way through my timidness. Another woman at another job openly said, in a room where 15 co-workers were situated, that if I didn’t finish up something she was waiting for she would “lash your ankles to the chair” until I did. I could only sit there. The best friend of a girl I dated in college would openly, OPENLY say in front of her friend and others, repeatedly, how they (as in a group of girls) would tie me up and spank me. Again, I wanted to experence that but could not verbalize something like that in front of all of them. At a party in college, I wound up in the presence of two girls. I don’t recall how this started, but one held my hands behind my back. They then led me out of the party. This was openly done, as this was in a dormitory high rise, and that elevator stopped at several floors, with many people seeing me with two girls, one standing behind me, holding my hands behind my back. We walked out to the parking lot, and I was seated in the front seat. The girl who was holding my hands again grabbed them from the back seat. At this point I started to get worried and got out of the car. I probably missed out on some real fun, but those were not the most attractive girls in the world and I didn’t know them. Women grope, pinch, and otherwise touch my behind openly. One night in what was a crowded bar that had emptied out, a tall girl slid one hand across my bottom, pressed her body into me as she passed by, then let her other slide over it as she passed by. Women at my health club will sometimes stand over me and watch while I do hamstring curls. You know, the machine where you lay down and your butt sticks up. 50-somethings do this the most, one even commented openly. This is where I started having fantasies of older women dominating me. Older women are much more confident and playful about these kinds of things. The woman who made the comment was an older woman I found attractive. She was a blonde with a healthy chest and nice legs. I would fantasize of her seducing me into submission. I would be a casual acquaintance whom she slowly would trick into asking for a punishment for not following her directions to a T. She would then introduce more punishments, protocols, bondage, servitude, and worship, with me not realizing what was happening. I would only be concerned about obeying her and living up to her demands. I would be, in her private presence, effectively owned. She left the club five years ago while I was on a month long business trip. I miss her. Now I actively check out older women and imagine them being dominate – possibly looking for a younger toy to play with. I think there are potentially a lot of these types out there. I like to see images of older women dominating younger men. Of course, being dominated by women my own age or younger is equally intoxicating. I had to get an enema as part of an internal test. So I do have some experience being naked in front of a fully clothed woman, being ordered about and being physically tormented.

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godawgs99
 
 Age: 33
  Michigan