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Well some time ago my lover of 22years ( husband for 16 of those years) and father of my 2 children informed me that he wants a divorce as I am "Too Vanilla" to meet his "New Needs". Since I haven't felt "vanilla" for awhile (but was too scared to bring it up) I proposed a trial period where I would attempt to meet these "New Needs" of his. I told him what my hard limits were and he agreed. As soon as I gave up my control to him I felt freed. I had the most satisfying sexual experiences of my life. Too bad I found out the next day that he wasn't REALLY giving me a chance as he had been cheating on my with my best friend of 23 years and they had an agreement...a Committed Daddy/bg, D/s, S/m relationship going on 6 months and he will never want me back no matter what I do as they are IN LOVE! So I have this new knowledge that I have always been submissive in all but the bedroom and now I know I want to submit there also. Life goes on and I want to find someone I can love and submit to who will love me for me and treat me the way I deserve to be treated, with respect, consideration and caring. I am tired of being lied to when I am always honest, loyal, and faithful. :)
It's over except for the paperwork and I am feeling very alone. :(
Oh well...tomorrow is a new day, it has to get better! |
