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ctandy86
Hetero Male, 37, Chesapeake, Virginia 
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ctandy86

Join me and take a step into a world of passion and discovery, where your submissive nature can be fully explored. I am a 37-year-old military man, standing tall at 6ft 3 and weighing 280lbs. Active in the lifestyle for over a decade, I possess the knowledge and experience to guide you on an extraordinary journey of submission and self-discovery. While I am happily married to someone outside of this lifestyle, she fully supports and embraces my desires and experiences here.

Honesty, integrity, loyalty, and open communication are the foundations of my character. These values are essential for any successful relationship, regardless of its nature. Authenticity and trust are the cornerstones that allow genuine connections to flourish. Rest assured, I am fiercely loyal and protective of those I hold dear.

Venturing into the realm of BDSM is not only a passion of mine but also an opportunity I'm eager to share with the right woman. From the captivating world of erotic hypnosis to the exhilaration of anal play, I possess a wealth of knowledge and experiences. Whether it's through in-person or online interactions, I take great delight in guiding and directing my partner. Just imagine the thrill of rough encounters and the exploration of your deepest desires.

Within the realm of dominance and submission, mental domination and erotic hypnosis hold a special place of pleasure for me. The art of erotic hypnosis and various conditioning methods truly excite me, and I nurture a profound fantasy of "building" a perfect submissive through hypnosis and other behavioral modification techniques.

Curiosity draws me towards watersports, name-calling, degradation, and the tantalizing concept of a chastity task reward system. Envision earning your pleasures through completing assigned tasks and pushing your boundaries, allowing for immense personal growth and fulfillment.

Obedience is an irresistible quality that ignites my desires. I am captivated by a woman who willingly serves her dominant, embracing the exploration of new experiences with an open mind. Together, we will test limits and push boundaries, deepening our connection and creating a dynamic filled with trust, respect, and mutual growth.

Writing is another one of my passions, and I warmly welcome your thoughts on my stories. Engage me in thought-provoking conversations, whether they delve into the realms of kink or touch on other intellectual pursuits. Let's embark on an intriguing journey together, where our conversations stimulate both mind and soul.

If you're seeking an extraordinary connection with a man who embodies strength, intelligence, and sensuality, I eagerly await your message. Whether you're an experienced submissive or new to this world, I am open to women who are open-minded, willing, and eager to be trained. Please know that my wife fully supports and embraces this kind of dynamic. Rest assured, our interactions will be characterized by mutual respect, genuine curiosity, and the potential for an unforgettable connection. Together, let's explore the uncharted territories of pleasure and submission.

2/23/2024 6:16:50 PM: Five hour drive for a throat fuck, part 1.   In the not too distant past I had an encounter with a young woman that was quite enjoyable on my part. After talking for a couple weeks she decided to come down and visit me for a day. She drove five hours down to where I was to come and see me. Five hours one way with only the promise of meeting up to get some ice cream. It ended up being a bit more than that, but still, a five hour drive one way.  So after the five hour drive we met at a dairy queen not far from where my house is. She was very shy, but she built up the courage to at least get a little ice cream. We ordered and had some light conversation waiting for our ice cream to be made. Once we got it we went back to my car and sat and talked while enjoying the sweet treat. After we had finished and talked for a while longer, I asked if she would like to come back to the house with me. She agreed and went back to her car to follow me.  We got back to the house and went inside. Spent a little bit of time introducing her to the dog and letting her get a little more comfortable. After a while we migrated to the couch at turned on some unimportant TV show and continued to talk. I asked her how she was feeling and what she was thinking and her response was simply 'I'm shy'.  I asked if she would be more comfortable texting me her thoughts instead of saying them and she nodded yes. So she turned to her phone and typed away. We had discussed at length the different things that we both enjoyed sexually over the last couple weeks. One of the things that she particularly enjoyed but was shy and bashful about was being throat fucked, used very hard, given little if any chance to breathe or recover, and having a man have his way with her for his pleasure.  My phone vibrated after she finished typing away. In short, her message said that she was shy and nervous but she really wanted to please me and just needed me to tell her what to do and she would do it. I asked her verbally if she was sure and she nodded yes.  'Good, very good.' I say to her as she sits on the opposite end of the couch with her gaze averted down and away from me. I move over to her, grab her gently by the chin and lift her face towards me.  'Look at me.' I say and she responds immediately.  I tell her 'You're going to be my good little slut now and do what I want, but I know how shy you can be and I don't want you pushing yourself further than you can handle. So at any point if things get too intense for you, you are simply going to say Time Out. Do you understand?'  She nods her head yes again and I say, 'No, for this you have to say it. I need you to tell me verbally that you understand and that this is what you want. Do you understand? Is this what you want?'  She turns her eyes downward again and says 'Yes Sir, to both.'  With that I step back away from her and sit back down on the couch. 'On your knees in front of me.' I command and she moves immediately.  Oh we are going to have some fun tonight. I think to myself. Yes we are going to have some fun.  To be continued.......

6/17/2023 7:19:10 PM: Requirements as a submissive; honesty, trust, and genuine effort, not perfection.   I think a lot of people have the wrong idea or wrong impression of what it takes to be in a dynamic. They have this fairy tale mentality about BDSM dynamics and what they should be like. I imagine this is because in some ways they have been so romanticized and popularized that its a great fantasy for things to work out that way. Unfortunately though, that isn't reality. At least not for the majority of us. We don't need perfect. We aren't looking for perfect, and we don't want you to be perfect. What we want is honesty, trust, and genuine effort.   Now those three things can mean a lot more than what they look like on the surface. So lets break it down a little. Starting with honesty. What does honesty mean? Well it means a lot. It means being honest, being truthful, being real, meaning what you say, and saying what you mean. It means so much more than that but I think that you get the idea. Take it from someone who found out the hard way how difficult life can be when you don't live it honestly compared to how much easier it is when you just live within the truth. When there are no secrets or games and you are just you, all of the good parts and the bad. You take responsibility for yourself and your faults and when you screw up you admit it. You are honest about who you are and what you want. One of the biggest parts in honesty in my opinion though, being a person of your word. If you say you are going to do something, or that you wont do something, you hold yourself to it. Your word is your bond. If you cant do that then you really aren't worth much.   Next we move on to trust. So what is trust? Well to put it simply trust is a combination of honesty and actions. At least thats a very simply put version of what it is really. Without trust you can't build any kind of real foundation for anything. That applies to any kind of relationship and not just anything in the realm of BDSM. That applies to friendships and work relationships just as much as personal and romantic relationships. Without trust you can't ever really let yourself go in any situation. You are always on guard. Without trust nothing will work in the long term, it will all be just a superficial flash in the pan.   Last we come to genuine effort. You can have honesty and trust, but it wont mean much of anything unless a person is willing to put forth genuine effort. You can have all of the perfect components and get absolutely nowhere if only one person is putting forth any effort or if one person is only putting forth minimal effort. We all understand that everyone has a life, we are all busy, we all have things going on, we get that. All I'm saying is don't claim to want something if you aren't willing to put forth the effort in actually pursuing or developing it. Maybe you don't put in the effort because you are scared, or any number of 100 different reasons, who knows. What I do know is how absolutely disheartening it can be when someone tells you over and over again that they want something with you and then they just never show up. If you want it, then you have to put forth the effort. Actual genuine effort. And yes that may mean taking time out of your day doing other things that you normally do like watching tiktoks or whatever other superficial thing it is that you spend most of your time doing. When you tell someone repeatedly that you want something with them, but also that you never have time for them its difficult but most people will still make an effort. When they later find out that you actually spend hours a day on social media not actually doing anything and you are still claiming that you don't have enough time for them thats a giant slap in the face. Learn how to prioritize what is important if these are things that you actually want and stop playing with the people that do actually want them if you don't.   Honesty, trust, and genuine effort. In my opinion, I don't feel like those things are too much to ask, at least not to start with. Maybe I'm wrong, who knows. I've been known to be a little old fashioned in my values in that sort of way. Maybe I'm no longer with the times. If thats the case then so be it I guess. I have a feeling that I'm not the only one that thinks the way I do though. Here is to hoping that I'm not. 

6/7/2023 5:15:52 PM: Training a new submissive, what does that mean Training means something slightly different to every person. The overall ive is to change, modify, or adjust behaviors, attitude, abilities, and desires of the submissive to match that of the dominant. When done in good faith and conscience that means making those changes and adjustments not only with consent of the submissive but also in respect to limits and limitations. Many people have different methods to training and how it is most effective or best accomplished. Here is my opinion and what I intend to do once I find the sub with which to explore that journey with. I think that training, for the most part should be gentle and takes time. Other disagree and think that rough fast training is more effective. In my experience, especially when working with someone that is very new, that can be extremely overwhelming. I think that training should be well thought out, methodical, and subtle, especially at first. Instead of diving into punishments and harsh corrections, gentle reminders and calm but authoritative explanation can be much more effective. I also like to explore other mediums with witch to train a submissive. I very much enjoy exploring erotic hypnosis and showing someone new what kind of things you can do with it. How with very little time you can accomplish much in training a new sub. The key to this sort of exploration is not only consent, but informed consent and full understanding of the process. Someone willing to participate. This is not the sort of thing you can be rough and forceful with. It takes a gentle touch, especially when the goal is long term. Like many I do enjoy the rougher aspects of sexuality, rough sex can be intoxicating under the correct circumstances. That being said, it's not something to rush into head first with someone who has no experience of it. If you work into it slowly, what feels like excruciatingly slow to some, you might be surprised what you can accomplish. Fear can be a powerful motivator for some, but most will push themselves much further if they feel safe and know that they can trust their partner. When I say excruciatingly slow I don't mean in the course of one session. I don't mean over a week or even a couple weeks. When something is worth it you will be willing to put for the time and the effort to take things as slow as necessary. Sometimes this means months or even longer. I'll use anal training as an example. For someone who has never experienced any kind of anal play it can be overwhelming and painful if someone rushes things. If someone goes from no experience at all to full on anal sex in one session it may push them to never wanting to do it again. If you take your time however, start with toys and plugs and gently and slowly build up endurance and size then when the actual anal sex happens it can be an amazing experience on both ends. Like I already said, weeks or months, not necessarily hours or days. When you work together on accomplishing something like that and you ensure that the submissive partner feels safe and cared for then will often times push themselves further than you imagined they could. This is the sort of thing that I'm looking for. This is the kind of dynamic I want to find with a submissive woman, because when you build things up the right way, they last much longer and they mean much more. So where are you young lady? I know you're out there somewhere. I just have yet to find you. When I do, I very much look forward to the training.

4/4/2023 12:02:38 PM: Birthdays I don't particularly like birthdays. Partly because most of the time you can never really get or do what you want to do. Partly because I don't think that you should need a special occasion to show someone that they are appreciated or cared for.  Sadly though, regardless of how hard to try to slow the time and make things last, the time still ticks away and moment come and go faster than we know what to do with. Another year older, a little but wiser, and a little yes young and reckless. I guess thats all one can really ask for. And well of course lots of tittie pics, because who doesn't love a great pair of tits. Lol.  Anyways, I raise a glass to those that didn't make it this far, and offer a toast to those still kicking.

10/29/2021 12:26:35 PM: Who knew that journals were back and didn't tell me?? How long have they been back?? Hey everyone!!!!! Journals are back!!!!

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sub4always
 
 Age: 28
 Virgin Islands