2/28/2023 5:36:32 AM: 'tis been awhile since this pig has visited the journal section of CS.  Since the parting of admins way back when, it has taken awhile for the site to deliver what it did previously.  pig has often considered these journal entries to be one of the best features of the site and something that is not found in other social websites.  Kudos to the admin for returning this feature.  pig can only hope that punctuation is not limited here as it has found it to be in the messaging feature (so frustrating!). That'll do it for the moment; there is much that pig will be adding to the journal section in the days, weeks and months to come.  This was a test to see how well this feature is working at this time.  Be well all!

3/28/2018 1:06:56 PM: I've recently received a rather kind and generous message from a user here. My response was rather lengthy. I've decided to edit the message a bit and post it here: I've been so busy lately doing things for others and when it comes to things I should be doing, I'm too tired. Thanks for your kind words. Truth be told, I've become so weary of the self-appointed doms and the self-serving miscreants that I continually seem to attract on these sites. (Currently, I have accounts on Adam4Adam, Recon and of course, CollarSpace. I was spending some time on Craig's List but the personals there are now history. In the fifteen years since my release, I may have been with five different guys; four of which were one time only and that was only to suck their cocks. The fifth was the only one that had any degree of warmth to it and again, that was me using my mouth to service body parts. He moved out of Massachusetts and I heard nothing further from him. The prison experience was at a minimum difficult. Still today, I am reconciling those experiences-- both forced as well as willing. The black element (or perhaps I should say 'brown') is key in my attempting to reconcile those experiences. Perhaps some history would be in order regarding speaking to my decision to develop my breasts. Back at the end of 2016, I was having difficulty seeing. I do much computer work-- setting up PCs, networks and web sites. When I went to have my eyes examined, I was informed that I was suffering with cataracts. I was referred to an ophthalmologist. Unfortunately, having no trust or desire to interact with any government agency and having no insurance and very little income, I was at odds with how to proceed. A few months later, my sight had become so milky that I was unable to drive. As time progressed, very quickly I might add, the cataracts became worse. Watching television became a challenge. I hung dark drapes in my room and found myself sleeping days and being up at night when it was dark. Finally, I embraced Mass Health and was given a Standard card. I went to the ophthalmologist with my Mass Health Standard Card and after many examinations by remarkable technology, was told that I needed to have a physical before I could have the cataract procedure. I hadn't seen a doctor or been examined in thirty-five years. As with much in my life, I had no faith in them and actually resented their know-it-all attitude. Just prior to the cataracts becoming all consuming, I had a problem with my pathetic little cock. I am uncircumcised and the foreskin would no longer pull back over the glans. The foreskin had always been able to expose the head of my cock but now it was but a tight little ring around the urethra. I begged my way in at the local queer community health center and with a payment of ten dollars was examined. I was informed that I was suffering from PHIMOSIS. Immediately, the doctor was scheduling me to go to a full service hospital to be circumcised. I was angered with his presumption that I would accept his direction without question and informed him and her that I would have to research further before doing anything. They kept mentioning 'being swollen' as I continued to protest that I had said nothing about any swelling-- that there had been none. I hadn't made the connection at that time but I was having trouble masturbating for my cock wouldn't get completely hard which was a new experience. So, back to the physical exam. In my twelve years in prison, I had always refused any medical attention save the extraction of all my teeth. The staff knew me well enough that they never called me for 'med call' but rather would summon me around seven o'clock in the evening to sign a refusal form. At the community health center I had visited, I was attended by a young female intern. I was NOT impressed but being a pauper, I was polite and held my tongue. (Unusal for me as I tend to be brash, bold and rather blunt.) In the process of these examinations, I dealt with three such female interns. The more I dealt with them, the more discouraged I became. Finally, I demanded to see an 'attending' (was unfamiliar with the nomenclature at that time). A young male doctor responded and in no uncertain terms I told him that I was done with being the fodder for daddy's little girls to become grown up physicians. I won't detail the lack of 'bedside manner' afforded me by them. When all was said and done, I was informed that I was suffering from diabetes and hyper-tension. I was prescribed meds for the diabetes and a minimal for the hypertension. The focus was to bring down the numbers for my afflictions so that I could have the cataracts taken care of. By the time this was done, it was the fall. In September and again in October, 2017, I had one eye done and then the other. It was curious as I had been asked what was my pharmacy and I responded: Pharmacy, I don't have one! (As an adolescent, mom would not allow even an irin unless one was quite sick.) I studied all that I needed to know about my afflictions and purchased a blood pressure monitor as well as a device to check my glucose. Currently, my blood pressure is excellent (about 120 / 70) and my glucose averages between 100 and 130. My cock no longer gets hard. I have stopped taking the meds as of a month and a half ago. Now to respond to my breasts. I have switched to a combination of tea tree and lavender oil. From the regimen I developed in prison, in the morning, I shower and shave my body using baby shampoo. (Shaving cream dries out the skin.) I bathe with TONE SOAP. After my shower, I use tea tree oil on any blemishes that I have noticed. I massage my breasts with the combination of tea tree and lavender oil paying attention to my nipples (which are getting bigger). After about ten minutes of rubbing the essential oils into my breasts, I take two delightful suction cups with a twisting mechanism and place them over my nipples. As I twist the suction plunger, it draws my nipples out with the most exquisite pain. Sometimes, there is a leaking of fluid and a light blood color after leaving them on for twenty minutes to half an hour. Subsequent to that, the nipples develop some crusting which falls away in a few days. Each such practice makes the nipples a bit bigger each time. In the evening, I take another shower and soon after coat my body with coco-butter. I sleep with the coco-butter on and the subsequent morning shower is a delight as the sensation of the coco-butter being washed away is actually exciting! Of course, this assists in the daily shaving maintenance. I am naked in the house always and would be naked all the time were I able to do so without offending or getting into trouble. (Oh, to live in Vermont!) I find myself massaging my breasts frequently and excite myself by squeezing and pinching my nipples. As of a month ago, I have begun taking PUERARIA MIRIFICA once in the morning and again in the evening every day. I ordered it on eBay and after a while, it arrived from Thailand. I can no longer get hard enough to masturbate to an orgasm. However, my new best friend has become the vacuum cleaner hose. With my pathetic little cock and the foreskin I wouldn't let them cut away, I am able to achieve the most compelling orgasms! I have many videos of brown skinned men fucking white holes. They excite me! I have them on my server so that I can view them on my fifty inch television. On my computer, I play-- full screen-- this video I have of a young Asian guy poopin' in one of their toilet holes (they don't use toilets as we know them). He has such a long thick continuous turd that dwarfs his small body. While I am quite confused about such, I know that this relates to experiences put upon

6/4/2017 3:50:47 AM: pug has added some photos.  The first is one that has been up for awhile.The next is after shaving its body as it had been trained to do in prison.The next shows the tits that have been growing (unintended) instigated, pug believes, by the use of Tea Tree Oil on blemishes and the like.  Uncertain if this is a good thing or a bad thing.The rest of the photos were taken some time after its release from prison in 2003.  pug believes that with inspiration / proper motivation, it will be able to get back to its former body type.  it has experienced such motivation previously and knows how driven it can become when serving / pleasing Master.Note: those 'outfits' were worn in prison when it was made to provide service.Since it has been going through some psychological and emotional changes, it will be installing further journal entries to detail thoughts and hopes.

9/28/2013 5:57:14 PM: Unlike most that say they will update later, pug will.  Am back after a year's hiatus and much has been experienced.   (Unfortunately, none of it sexual or lifestyle as pertains to this site.)

2/10/2011 2:30:26 AM: Superior?  pug's definition?  A legend in their own mind!