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I have been away sence 2011....i have married a wannabe "master" fake and even though i loved him with all my being he was a fake with his feelings and his lifestyle.. but thats ok with me i am happy and know who i am and what i want. As for my "husband" he is back on here claiming he is real and enjoys bondage spankings and the barn we had when we lived together. he lies...lol...never went to the barn much less used it to play in..... |
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Good morning! As I said things are better,but I think in a few days I will leave this site for good. I have enjoyed meeting real Doms/Masters and submissives on here. Actually I have even enjoyed the fake/wannabes hereLOL. I enjoy a laugh from time to time..... |
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Things are getting better. I am beginnig to live again.I will be happy when I can give 100%and be collared again. I'm getting close but untill I can take care of myself I can't take care of someone else. Untill then I will survive. |
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Thank Goodness!!!! i save one submissive. She had been talking with john."MASTERAWAITES".she saw my profile and sent me an email here and i warned her proved to her what i say is real. Anyone that wants to see. can google him and will see the engagement anouncement and then contact me and i will answer all questions. This man is fake...even told this girl i was wanting him as my submissive.lol i dont have adominate desire in my body.lolhe told her first i was a slave and upset he would not come to me. well i proved he did live with me then he said i told him to leave.. now i am domme and want him as my sub. Please all that read this please pass it on to others so that they may be safe......good luck to all. i have talked to some very nice Doms on this site. i do hope there is one for me to serve.. |
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Hello,i am now working with the FBI in connection with the ex. i know i said i would not talk about him anymore but this is huge....The FBI is investigating Other women he has talked with and they have found him on about 10 other sites since he left so he is working hard right now..i do hope this will stop him and he gets it in the end. literally.LOL.... |
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i do enjoy talking with most Dom/Masters i have been honored to meet on this site. i say most because i still find some that are jerks or wannabes that doeant have a clue...i'm fairly new and i do have a lot to learn but i have talked with enough real Dom/Masters that i know protocal for some things. And one line with on your knees or humiliation with first message is not how it is done. Respect and honesty with getting to know someone is first...Give respect to earn respect.. |
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this will be my last entry about my ex...he knew i had found him and now he has deleted his profile.i have never seen someone as cowardly as he is..the only satisfaction i have is the warrents i have for his arrest....He should know me well enough by now to know i will not let this go...i love to get justice and it doesnt matter how long it takes.i just sit back and wait....one thing that i am so thankfull for is his ex didnt take him in as he thought she would...and he is living in a shelter...How is it John you left a nice warm home and now have nothing except warrents for your arrest....It feels GOOD to me........ |
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Yes the one i thought was my ex it turns out he is.lol...First after he realized i know who he is he changed his home town location. Now he has hidden his profile..He is such a coward.cant face me can you John? You are such a fool if you think you will get away with grand larcany! i have taken out warrents for that truck and warrents for the money and everything else you took. oh and remember you are still on probation? Well you have now vilated.They also have warrents for you..wonder what your cell mate will think of a wannabe dom? oh how i wish i could be there to watch...... |
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Well i am recovering.i still want to find real not wannabes or fakes.i have received messages from wannabes and well it is so discouraging..But i have had a lot of caring messages.i thank all of You for the care You have given me..i am talking to a very special man now.Who is very real and caring.We are working on a real time relationship and so far it is promising...............i have been surfing on here at times andi think i have seen my ex here again.ladys please be carefull especially if he talks of being marine and a daddy dom and is origionally from oregon...intials are J.E.W. PLEASE be carefull he is a fake and will steal everything you have....not all Dom/Masters from oregon who are marine and have been daddydoms are fake just this one.and i have seen him on here again.To bad he crawled away.He has a court date with the SSI and will win.mmmm 10 years back pay would have been nice.Could have had anything including your credit back.Baby you fucked up didnt you..lol.You really are a looser.lol. Just as i always thought........ |
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This girl is slowly recovering....Until then she will continue to dream of the day someone will claim her to own and use her as He wishes....she is somewhat masochist and longes to feel her tits,nipples and cunt used hard in anyway Sir wishes.....Oh to feel the warm stings of a good spanking.....The dream will someday become very real and she will give Master her all in everyway He desires......... |
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well it has been a week now and i'm still living....lol...i'm getting smacked from every direction.....Wish it was for pleasure....oh well life does go on. i'll make it...i always have. it's just hard to adjust to being alone....i dont mind it because i can have friends and answer to myself...but it does take getting use to......have a good day to A/all........... |
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well i am still living one day at a time. i still dont understand why i'm not heart sick or hurting for this relationship. i dearly love this man and would have done anything for and with him.i just dont hurt, not for him..i hurt for the financial difficulty i am in. But i know i will make it in time. Time is all we ever have and that is not promised....freedom |
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well here i am after a long hiatis......i have been through a lot.......back surg.,owned ,engaged,saved,loved and well i lived and am still living a good life. No longer engaged and i assume i have been released. Over time i learned he was never a good master,but he was a good man.Took very good care of me for a while..Anyway it is very good to be back......... |
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Well life is a lot of bumps and some are more bumpy than others.Master John is a good man and is good to me.. He does have His problems and He likes to play games with others. He finds so many that are easy targets and they fall prey to Him at times. i feel so sorry for them and me. He was talking to about 65 or more and we all well almost all fell for the lies. the disception.Ladys He is with me and we are to be married for a lifetime.W/we are growing together in O/our relationship as W/we learn one another. Untill i have enough. Ladys does some of these words sound familiar? They should it was a script He repeats over and over again...Anyway W/we are taking a journey together, learning and growing and loving O/our life even if it is a strange one...Take care all and please be carefull....freedom |
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Hi A/all it has been a while since my last entry.Life has been great!!!! On 9/3/08 Master John collared this girl.she has a collar of diamonds for work and leather at home.she never takes the work collar off.But.. somehow when the home collar has to be removed she feels naked and empty.It is a feeling she doesn't like but has to endure for the outside world.If they only knew what could be.........This girl is registered as a submissive/slave..#179-565-796..as belonging to Master John.Contracts agreed upon and signed with a lifetime commitment.This slave loves serving and being used pleasing Master in everyway. Master John is spoiling His girl.He also is showing her love like she has never known..........Master is planning on taking His slave and her granddaughter to the mountains this weekend A/all are looking forward to the time together.a break is needed from the move into the farm house and all the packing and unpacking.Master has not complained once about the junk i have collected over the years.It is unbelievable how much can be collected.LOL...Master has given His appoval of this entry as He massages His slaves back.Another way Master spoils this girl............Master John and His slave wish all a very Happy Thanksgiving..........This slave has something to be very thankfull for this year... i am living at heavensdoor......... |
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As of today my life has made a big change. i have agreed to belong forever to Master John. He wants me for a life time. i do hope He knows what He has taken on.lol.. He can control this girl. And well if she misbehaves He will show her how He will punish her.i will not disappoint Master John.The look of disappointment will hurt worse than any punishment He could give.....freedom |
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Once again life slaps me.LOL.But i must say this time it was a good slap...i know that things happen for a reason.i had said earlier in one of my journal entries that i did not know why i let a good man leave my life. i do now. It was not meant to be.i knew it then but well being the woman i am i would not accept that.To some extent i still want to control my destiny.As i journey down this road i find there are many lessons to learn.Some harder,some more hurtfull,some obvious.At any rate there are lessons to learn.i have had one very special man come back into my life.i cared for Him a few years ago and He never left my thoughts even though i never expected to hear from Him again. At that time neither of us was ready for a life together.Now it is time to work toward our life.It will take time but time brought us together again.This is meant to be at this time of our life.i will work hard to please Him in all ways.He has my heart mind body and soul,but most of all He has my love. Thank You Sir for comming back into my life....freedom |
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It has been awhile i had to do a lot of soul searching and find myself again.This had to be done in order to be true to myself and to someone that will someday be my Master.A Master deserves only the whole sub or slave.As i have said in my profile i am very submissive,but know that for the right one i will be a very good slave.my limits are my Masters. |
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i continue to get e-mails.i cant believe all of the nice people on this site. Then there are some that are such jerks. Only a few,but they are here.i continue to work to get my life straight For now i will work on finding my inner peace.That would be to find why i let such a great Man leave my life.i know i asked to be released because i was confused from what a family memeber said to me and very bad advise i recieved.Now i have to ask myself why i listened to these people that does not want me to ever be happy.i know it was fears but there was more.There were many things that i was told,i was "a joke to Master"and "dont burdon Master with my problems, He does not need that at this point in O/our relationship". Master never heard me,because i never talked to Him about this.i know that i am just a sub/slave...i really thought i would be pleasing Master by protecting Him from my embarrassment of a family.Well some of my family.i keep saying i would have done ANYTHING for Him.i would denie Him NOTHING,and i know in my heart i would have given anything or would have done anything for Master to please Him.i still would. i know that a Master's needs are before His slaves.she should never put herself first.Master is first and formost in all things.She knows that asking for release was wrong.she should have talked as she has said before.When i surrendered to Master it was all things.Mind,Body,Heart and Soul.Complete surrender...Master holds my Soul in His hand,He has left His mark on my Soul .In my heart He will always be my Master and i His sub/slave,i hope someday to be able to live this again,with the right one. ........freedom |
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i was suprised to learn something of myself recently.i have a great fear of commitment.So in order to have a commitment i must work on my fear.i do wish i could have seen that a few weeks ago.i might still be happy but working on my fears. But then again.i wonder if what i was so happy about was real. i know that Master was...is real. But i wonder if W/we were real or was it just me? i have to ask myself that.i would have given Him ANYTHING and EVERYTHING.Been anything for Him. Of course as life goes on so must i....i will never know what there could have been in that relationship.i try to heal and go on.i have been through the denial stage and the angry stage of the greiving process.Now i am in the healing stage.And heal i must and will in order to be happy again. i was told yesturday that i looked so sad in my pic.So i looked back over a few pics and they were right i do look so sad in all of my pics. i dont smile.i will work on changing that also.i wish i had a few pictures from a few months ago when i was happy.Funny there was none ever taken then.LOL i wonder why? i wonder was i not as pleasing as i could have been? i dont think Master would tell me that i was pleasing to Him if i had not been.It would crush everything i believe if a Dom/Master ever lied to me.i have met enough wannabes and jerks on sites.It is so nice when i meet someone that is real and honest.As for taking more pictures of my happiness,i will have to change that in the future.......freedom |
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All the e-mails! WOW! Everyone is so kind to me.Thank You.It means so very much that so many care how i am doing and want to give me words of encouragment.Someone said that there was a lack of communication on both parts and i must say i am beginning to realize it was on both sides.i have been taking all of the blame, But it was mostly my fault.i should have been honest with Master.i did not realize honesty was not just lieing but includes giving problems or anything else to Master.And i did not give Master my problems,which is part of Masters responsibility of owning a slave.i have learned that very important lesson.i should have talked to Master about what someone in my family was doing to me,or should i say what they were demanding of and the insults Masters slave was recieving from them.That REALLY scared me more than all the whips,floggers and singletails that could be used on me in one session.Instwead of talking with Master and recieving encouragemant from Master i listend to family and a so called "friend" that gave me bad advise.This was such disrespect for Master,i found the hard way that Master knows best and i should listen to Him in all things.i am trying very hard to learn this lifestyle and be a very good sub/slave for someone someday.......thank You for reading my journal....freedom |
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i have been back on for just about a day and i am so honored at the amount of e-mails i have recieved today. Thank You all for Your kind words and to say welcome back.The compliments on my profile and my pictures ,i thank You again for that.i am not really looking at this time i have some emotions to work through.i am dealing with loosing the best relationship that i messed up myself.i was impatient and showed my Master disrespect.So i will regret that for a long time.i wish i could turn back time but that is impossible.i will learn from my mistake and grow from it. Somehow i must pick up and live again.i do have the support of my daughters in this.They know me and my life and understand it completely......Thank You all again for Your support and kind words..........freedom |
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i have been away for awhile.i thought i had found my one for life....but that did not pan out....i was very happy for several months.....i became impatient...One thing i must learn..is patience.When i feel something is right then i must learn to sit back relax and trust.......i want 24/7 and no a couple does not have to live together to have 24/7.But there has to be communication in some fashion.It does not have to be on the phone daily,or the computer.Maybe an asignment,instructions to follow.Something to let an owned person know they are owned and missed. The sub/slave letting the Master know daily that she is thinking of Him.It can become very hard to sit and wait. This is one thing i must learn.These are just a few thoughts i have.......freedom |
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Their are people on this site that can send a message and then block you before an answer can be sent.If you cant take the answer then why send the message? This is not a childs site and that is very childish.First how do you know who is someones master and if there are others he owns or has a pet so be it.If you are truely a sub or slave then you understand there can be others and you are not always the only one.So if you have something to say....say it but dont be so simple to not take a response to the comment.... and typos can happen to anyone!!!!!!!come on be adult. |
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