I HAVE WRITTEN, REVISED, AND ESTABLISHED THE FOLLOWING CODE OF CONDUCT IN ORDER TO COMMUNICATE WHAT I BELIEVE IS PARAMOUNT TO THIS LIFESTYLE. PLEASE SEE MY OTHER COMMENTS LISTED BELOW FOLLOWING THIS OUTLINE.
1. RESPECT AND POLITE COURTESY: Whether Dom, Domme, sub or switch, all MUST be treated with respect--no exceptions. You should have no need to be cruel. You should not need to prove your strength. You should be courteous even to those who are not--even to those who do not like or care for you. Without this outward show of respect, we are nothing more than animals.
2. TRUST: Trust is primary to every relationship, but especially [so] to ours as we engage in far more intimate activities--relating to or indicative of one's deepest nature and desires.
3. HONESTY, TRUTH, AND JUSTICE: Honesty IS the best policy. Be acutely honest throughout your dealings with people. Believe in justice, not from other people, but from yourself. There are no shades of gray in the question of honesty and justice. There is only right and wrong.
4. MONOGAMY: Even in a relationship where there is a mutual understanding for "room for play," the primary partners MUST be monogamous emotionally--no exceptions!
5. RULES: Safe words and boundaries exist for a reason. Establish and use them.
6. PLAYERS: A dedicated Dom or sub does not "simply" play or collect "multiple meaningless" play partners. Those who do are "simply" whores who are not worthy of real consideration.
7. DISCRETION: Wise in conduct, coupled with cautious discernment, especially in matters of propriety and self-control. Remember, we are the minority--act appropriately.
8. SAFETY: Freedom from danger or hazard and/or injury. There is always some inherent risk involved in this lifestyle, but I think we all know to be careful. Don't be stupid. Never throw caution to the wind.
9. KNOWLEDGE: First, know thyself! Second, know thy desires. Third, know thy boundaries--and communicate to further establish knowledge in others.
10. UNDERSTANDING: Not everyone will agree. Nevertheless, we should all work to understand one another. To understand is to have knowledge. When we understand we comprehend the nature and significance of our and other's beliefs. When we understand we can be tolerant or sympathetic towards one another.
11. BE A GOOD EXAMPLE: There are plenty of bad examples out there. We all know of them--who these individuals are. Fight these stereotypical bad examples by living an exemplary life--worthy of imitation--serving as a model of good behavior within our lifestyle and beyond.
12. BE IMPECCABLE WITH YOUR WORD: Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the power of words to speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use the power of your words in the direction of truth and love.
13. DON'T TAKE ANYTHING PERSONALLY: Nothing others do is [exclusively] because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won't be the victim of needless suffering.
14. DON'T MAKE ASSUMPTIONS: Find the courage to ask questions and to express what you really want. Communicate with others as clearly as you can to avoid misunderstanding, sadness and drama. With just this one agreement, you can completely transform your life.
15. ALWAYS DO YOUR BEST: Your best is going to change from moment to moment; it will be different when you are healthy as opposed to sick. Under any circumstances, simply do your best, and you will avoid self-judgment, self-abuse and regret.
16. COURAGE: We are the minority in an all too vanilla world. We, therefore, must have courage in our lifestyle. It is absolutely risky. It is dangerous. It is living life completely, however. Fully. Wonderfully. Courage is not blind. Courage is intelligent and strong.
17. HONOR: You should only have one judge of your honor, yourself. Decisions you make and how these decisions are carried out are a reflection of whom you truly are. You cannot hide from yourself.
18. COMPASSION: Be compassionate! Help your fellow man at every opportunity. If an opportunity does not exist, go out of your way to find one.
19. COMPLETE SINCERITY: When you say you will perform an action, it should be as good as done. Nothing should stop you from completing what you say you will do. In living this way, you do not have to "give your word." You do not have to "promise." Speaking and doing are the same action.
20. DUTY AND LOYALTY: Having done some "thing" or having said some "thing" you must own that "thing." You are responsible for it, and all of the consequences that follow. Be immensely loyal to those in your care. To those you are responsible for, you must remain fiercely true.
21. KEEP TO THE CODE: This should be self-explanatory. However, keeping to the code as outlined here will help ensure your happiness, safety, and enjoyment within our lifestyle--at least in my opinion. Good luck! And, I invite you to let me know how its going.
Now that I've communicated that, let me continue...
Who am I?
I am the Master of my own life and a Dom--plain and simple. These are the rules I strive to live by. Again, should you agree, disagree, or should you care to comment, I encourage you to do so. Nevertheless, I invite everyone to... "Keep to the code."
I am also a 40-something [dominant] male living in the Chicago area. I'm extremely happy with who I am. I'm 5'11" tall, built like a power lifter, work out regularly, am well educated, well read, well employed, well traveled, and am learned in my profession. I love the arts, sciences, and my lifestyle. I am confident. I depend only upon myself and do not "need" anyone to boost my ego or give me worth. I do "desire," however, to find a submissive woman with whom a relationship can be built. I like the theater, movies, concerts, the symphony, hiking, camping, and traveling. I'm the perfect host and/or person to travel with/dine with. I am experienced in many areas of life, but care to think there is always something more to learn. I'm firm, but also considerate. I'm mature, but not old. I'm young at heart, but not foolish. I'm clean, healthy, and expect that you will be too! I am, of course, a Dom through and through. What more is there to say? Tons, I'm sure, but this will have to do for now. If I'm the sort of Dom/person you'd like to get to know, I encourage you to do so!
Ideal Person:
As I've said before, I'm looking for a submissive woman with whom a [long-term] relationship can be built. Doormats be gone! I'm looking for a woman who thinks, has opinions, and cares to discuss them...along with the ability to have a conversation on just about anything. I'd like to find a woman who takes care of herself...or is at least working on it. I admit that I don't [often] have much in common with women half my age, but am open to the possibility. (Just have never found it to work yet.) I do like kids. I'm just a big kid myself, really. If these words describe you, and you're looking for someone like me, drop me a note!
