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My name is Stephen, I am a Daddy/Dom that is caring and protective, I am neither a sadist or masochist, I will never harm you. I desire an intelligent, creative and loving daughter/sub. This is a two way relationship like any other and must be based on honesty, trust, open communication and a love for one another. I am in no rush, but I am not here for cyber sex. Talk to Me and let's see what happens. Stephen
Read this before you judge Me:
I mentioned the term Daddy Dom in a chat room the other day and was greeted by a resounding Yuk! It got me thinking about the misconceptions surrounding this aspect of D/s. I realize most think that it involves a father/daughter relationship. That isn't quite true, Daddy/little girl is a much different level. I do not know if I can explain what I mean so I will simply talk about what a Daddy Dom is to me. First I should say that in my relationship my Dom is not my father, he is nothing like my father, and I have no need for him to replace my father. He is however my Daddy. We do not engage in age play specifically (beyond the occasional school girl fantasy *s*) and our relationship is not based on any need to have sex with children. I am always all woman, and always a very independent woman. He does have the ability to make me feel like a little girl, however, a very cherished and sometimes needy little girl. It is a feeling that I revel in, it is the safest place I have ever been, and it allows me the freedom to be all that I am without fear of reprisals. So… what makes a Daddy Dom? First and foremost he loves his little girl. She is his prized possession. His eyes light up when she walks into the room and he takes great pride in her successes. After all, he helped to create her. She holds the most tender part of his heart and has the greatest power to hurt him. Seeing her hurt however is not something a Daddy Dom wants. He sees it as his job to protect her, both from the outside world and herself. He may love to cause her great pain in a scene, but he hates to be the one to hurt her emotionally. It hurts him to have to punish her , but he knows it is sometimes necessary. This takes great strength on his part. It takes strength to control her, and to shape her to his needs and desires. It takes strength to be her confidant, her shoulder, her anchor. It takes strength to let her out into the world when all he wants to do is hold her safe in his arms. And it takes strength to do what is necessary when she needs to be disciplined. A Daddy Dom knows the value of discipline, though at times his soft heart gets the best of him. He knows that in order for his little girl to be the best she can possibly be he must stand firm. He uses his experience in life and his knowledge of her to provide proper direction and punishment when the need arises. He knows this hurts her, and that tears at his heart, but he also knows it is for her own good. A Daddy Dom provides something else that is very important to his submissive - acceptance. She is safe in his arms because he knows her, everything about her, and he still loves her. When she goes to him she knows that this man knows all of her dirty little secrets and it doesn't matter. To him she is beautiful. Many of you may be asking what separates a Daddy Dom from any other Dom. In most cases very little. Hopefully they all provide love, strength, protection, discipline, and acceptance. I have heard Daddy Doms described as a kinder, gentler, Dom. I like that definition though I know it won't apply to all. I guess when it really comes down to it I can't explain it. There is something infinitely magical about a Daddy Dom. Perhaps it is something only a little girl can understand.
Daddy/little girl does not refer to the ages, real or pretend, of the participants. Nor does it imply closet desires. It refers to the environment that two people have created. A Daddy Dom is so named because of the qualities he possesses and the service he provides. So, what are these qualities? What is a Daddy Dom? A Daddy Dom wants to be the center of your universe. He wants to be able to provide for your every need and care. But more than that he wants to be able to shape and mold you to the image he thinks you should become. He sees in you someone who, in his mind, can achieve a much higher, much greater status. He believes more in you than you believe in yourself. What he wants in return is to be able to bask in his image of you, the image he has created. How does he achieve his goals? Through love, respect, and discipline. His love for his little girl goes without saying. He accepts every part of her and works to emphasize the good while improving the bad. He loves her as much for who she is as for who she will become with his guidance. It is this love that allows him to train her. He could not invest so much of himself in someone he did not love completely. This love would not be possible without respect. A Daddy Dom needs to feel great pride in his possession. He needs to know she can hold her own in the outside world and still submit to him. He holds the greatest respect for the gift she has given him and takes great pains to increase it's value. It is extremely important to him to know she can be with any man and she chooses to be with him. He knows that this makes discipline a priority in their lives, more important than in some other D/s relationships. In order for the little girl to really trust she must know he means what he says. He must constantly deepen her respect for him. If he does not enforce discipline, this respect becomes a tenuous thing. If his submissive finds that she can manipulate him out of punishing her, she begins to lose respect and the ability to empower becomes impeded. He needs to empower her as much as he wants to possess her and it becomes increasingly difficult to be possessed by someone you do not respect. The discipline is also important when it comes to her protection, both from those outside the relationship and those within. He is the one who makes the decisions about how she will relate to the world in general and his discipline ensures that she follows these rules. I think most Doms have a bit of the Daddy in them, taking on the role of male authority figure in their submissive's life and using their power to enrich that life. Daddy/little girl verbalizes that feeling, and adds a dimension of warmth, caring, and ritual that its participants crave.
Daddy Doms are Dominants who simply assume a much more nurturing and caring role than Dominants in other types of D/s relationships. Little girls are submissive women who have a naturally childlike personality that is especially dominant in them when they are around a Daddy Dom who makes them feel safe and cherished.
Daddy Doms vs. Masters:
Daddy Doms are just like other Dominants and Masters but with 1 or 2 key differences. They still take charge and enjoy being in control but they often enforce different kinds of rules. Daddy Doms will more likely focus on their sibmissive’s personal growth, goals and needs than on things like protocol and how certain actions are carried out. Another difference is that Daddy Doms not only accept but actually value and treasure their submissive’s inner little, encouraging their sub to enter and even live in ‘little space’, to play and to explore and enjoy their little side. Other Masters may rather prefer a submissive with an adult attitude towards life and may actually find littles annoying. Another big difference between other Dominants and Daddy Doms is that being playful, having fun and being able to laugh, A LOT, is a necessity and it is also essential to have a nurturing and affectionate relationship with your little. Not to say that other types of Masters cannot show affection but for the most part they seem to me more stoic, more rigid and far less full of warm fuzzies.
Daddy Doms and Sadism:
Just because a Daddy Dom is nurturing and affectionate does not mean that he cannot be sadistic as well. They can enjoy and embrace their inner sadist while catering to and fulfilling their submissive’s masochistic side.
What is a Daddy-Dom’s job?
First and foremost, Daddy Doms are Dominants and as such it is his job to take charge of his little, to guide her and help her achieve her goals, to protect her and to love and nurture her. Other types of Dominants may be free to flippantly order their submissive around purely for their own pleasure but Daddy Doms dominate and enforce rules according to goals set in place in order to nurture and guide their little and based on what is in their submissive’s best interest.
That being said, Daddy Doms do get a great deal of pleasure from their littles both sexually and otherwise.
Being a Daddy Dom is simply a part of someone’s personality, he likes being a dominant but he likes doing to in a more affectionate and nurturing capacity than is the accepted norm for D/s lifestyle relationships. Daddy Doms often enjoy and find both the little and adult sides of their submissives attractive and can appreciate them both. littles appeal to them because they cater to their desires to nurture, protect and love as well as him enjoying and being amused by the natural, child-like little girl personality in a beautiful adult woman’s body.
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