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Had some thoughts today about orgasm control/denial...when don't i? 
i was specifically thinking of how to explain it to someone who didn't understand...who didn't have that particular kink...
first and foremost i would explain that it isn't (for me) about not wanting sexual release. it isn't about not wanting to be sexual. it is one of those lovely paradoxes...more denial equals more arousal!
of course that isn't the case if it isn't handled well..it doesn't work if the One in control brings you to the edge, says no and then forgets about it...time goes by and the topic isn't mentioned, life intervenes and the next "session" comes about as if it were completely separate from the previous...not really very good at all...
for me, "no" is the beginning...bring me to the edge, whisper some version of no or not now sweetly, than continue to tease me...have me please You...explain and remind me that You know better than i how to handle the needs of my body, that You will allow me release when it pleases You the most...hold me in Your arms while my body's ache and desire subsides into a simmering warmth just below the surface of my skin...then begin again, or tell me to sleep...but don't forget the next day...remind me, have me get to the edge for You and stop, call me at work and ask me if i'm wet for You...remind me that although You may play with me again You still may not allow me to cum, perhaps give me a chance to "earn" it by pushing at one of my boundaries...and finally, when You can tell that it is too much for me, or when You feel it will please YOU the most, allow it but make me beg, get me there, and remind me again that it will only happen because You have decided for me that it is time...*big sigh* doesn't that sound lovely?
see, it isn't about cumming or not cumming, it is about being controlled and giving that control away...about love and anticipation and play, about the mind and taking sexuality beyond the bedroom...24 hour simmering and romance!
have a joyous holiday A/all! |
