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I'm like a flaming, exploding missile. Mostly. Other times, less flame, more sizzle. I like life. enjoying all of it, trying stuff that makes me uncomfortable, reaching for things that seem out of reach, etc. So, yeah...D/s is complicated. I'm still learning how to fit it into my life and what I'm truly looking for. I've played and had shorter relationships for many years that dabbled with various 24/7 concepts. I've spent a ton of time looking and researching other people's attempts at 24/7 lifestyles to see what works, what doesn't and what even is possible. I've always generally embraced the idea that success in D/s relationships should mirror regular vanilla ones - the core values that keep a couple together are universal. communication, similar interests, aligning personalities, etc. I've always been fascinated by the idea of full time submission (and dominance, of course.) It is something I have always wanted to try to bring to my own life. But how do I do this? My current conclusion is that success in 24/7 D/s hinges on these general things: 1> Honesty and Communication The hardest one! It's even more crucial than in a vanilla relationship, imo. I think its mostly about trying to be your true, honest self and finding ways to communicate your needs and wants clearly. I think this is the downfall of most D/s relationships. The attempt to ritually follow ideals that are outside our own interests and capabilities or better yet, live up to an image is pressure that most of us don't need. Personally, this is something that I see as a destroyer of men.
I look sometimes at the "wants" of a submissive and think to myself, my god -that man doesn't exist, no one can live up to that. Outside of D/s, the pursuit of fulfilling an ideal almost destroyed my own life. I'm coming to realize that success can be had without limitations if I allowed my self to just be. So how does this apply to my D/s desires? I'll tell you a little about me.
I'm a rebellious, anti-authority kind of person by nature. I've been rich and poor and have traveled a good bit of the world. I'm a dreamer, and most of the choices I've made have reflected that. I'm rarely satisfied with most of what I do and I've learned to live with that. I'm strong in many, many ways, but I recognize the immense power of collective life beyond myself and I am learning to accept my own fears and deficiencies not as weaknesses but as conditions of life. I know I will always look for the spectacular things in life, and I'm learning how to live with the good and bad that brings. I'm definitely more of a mental dominant. i want control first and foremost. I prefer and want to be with a naturally submissive woman. I'm not into breaking people or constantly fighting to suppress someone's natural urges. I want and need my personality to be the driving force of my relationship. I want to be followed and its imperative that my partner take pleasure and satisfaction in being led. I always want my partner with me and with that comes a strong desire to control her life. I like to tell her how to dress and how to look. I enjoy telling her where we're going to eat, and what we're going to do. I want to have fun with her! If I want to conquer the world, I want her there by my side! I crave loyalty and want to give that with totality in return. One of my biggest needs that has been harder to accept and be honest about - is that I want obedience from her. I do not want to constantly play the power game with her. I'm a rational, balanced, caring person - I'm not looking for blind obedience. There will be no orders to jump off a cliff. If i tell her to do something, i'll have already considered whether its a reasonable request. She needs to want to obey me on some level at first and accept that I'm expecting it as we grow together. I love discipline and she needs to want that kind of guidance. I will not give out laundry lists of rules and turn us into drones. That's not going to work. The idea is that she learns my expectations and does her best to do what I ask of her. She will have needs that I will have to learn as well, its just as imperative that I fulfill them! I want us to be able to communicate our needs and accept that life in general is often with flaws and imperfection. I'm not ever going to be MrDomLordHighness and I don't want a robot sub. Sometimes our needs are what makes us who we are without grace and elegance. I'm good with that. 2> Compatible Interests I laugh when I hear that cliche "opposites attract." They may attract, but they don't last. This is not about BDSM or D/s. Quite simply, you've got to be into what your partner is into on a basic level. It's so simple and its mind blowing to me how often its overlooked in relationships of all types. If I'm a chess master and spending 10 hours a day playing - my partner better like chess. It's no different with D/s, imo. Lack of compatible interests I believe is the number one reason for infidelity. 3> Real Physical Attraction I don't care what anyone says - this is the foundation for how we approach each other mentally. We are still animals at the core. It's a common thing for submissive women to say they aren't overly concerned with what he looks like and just care about what type of Dom he is/personality, etc. It's a total self-con.
For long term relationships, its absolutely crucial that the person passes the basic hot or not test. It doesn't matter if you are with an ogre. If you look at your ogre and think, "damn, i'd like to fuck!" - you've already won half the battle. So if you see yourself in anything I've posted or are interested in me or what I've said - say hello! I have pictures, but do not have them on my profile for privacy issues. I will be glad to share them privately.

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Juliaanne1975
 
 Age: 20
 Baltimore, Maryland