Finally my work in Central Asia is coming to an end, and I will soon be looking to relocate. Right now I have no idea where, I'm looking for a new job globally.

Since I will be leaving the D/s desert of Central Asia I took a look at my profile, expecting to see needs for an update. But I was a bit surprised to find that I still agree with what I have written earlier years. I'm a consistent submissive!

While on the topic of chastity I feel like rambling a bit more.

I think most Dommes would agree that orgasm control makes a lot of sense. I know it works in my case, when my balls get heavy I get more submissive and more service minded, all my thoughts center on the Woman who decides when I next time will get release.

But does the control have to be enforced with a chastity device? A matter of taste I guess. I do think the 'honor system' works too, I have never masturbated without permission in a D/s relationship. But a chastity device is admittably more effective as it takes away erections too (at least some devices do). I only have experience of being locked up in 'the Curve', and I can say that I get quite desperate already after 1-2 days. Just to be allowed an erection. Without a belt it takes a few more days before I start climbing the walls.

However, being locked up is really not easy. I know that a lot of slaves and submissives are locked up 24/7 and for long periods of time. They may not have a choice, but I still think it is quite an impressive feat.

My main issue is sleeping with the belt on. After some time of denial I start having continuous 'wet dreams' at night, but with a device on they end by waking up with a painfully suppressed erection. The Curve allows me to get half-erect, but then I run out of space. This presses the head of my cock against the plastic, causes unpleasant skin friction on the side, and the ring around my balls is pulled forward, thus squeezing my testicles. And to make it worse, once my penis is filled with blood it isn't so easy to go from half-erect to soft again, even though I'm in pain. So it may take 10 minutes to calm down again, and then I'll fall asleep, only to wake up a bit later in the same painful situation. After a few nights I'm willing to do whatever it takes for some genital freedom...

Don't other male submissives have this problem? Do they manage to control themselves while sleeping? Or do the just suffer without complaining? Or would I get used to the belt if I had to wear it for longer times, like a couple of weeks? I think the longest I have been locked up now was still less than a week.

Maybe my tool would submit to the belt if just given no other option?

Would be 'interesting' to test it, but then I'd need the help of a somewhat sadistic Domme. In the past when locked up I have done all I could to please, and I have been given freedom again. For a proper test the key should probably be with someone who isn't too sensitive to a male submissives pleading. And if that test would be before I relocate next time it would likely have to be online. Perhaps using a 'ChronoVault' for the key management, though they are a bit expensive? And perhaps a webcam installed in my bedroom and linked to a webpage so you could following my nightly suffering? :-)

What kind of picture should a male submissive upload, if he like me is unwilling to post a face picture in the profile? (I am happy to send a face picture per request). A Female would post a shot of her feet, her legs, or maybe some cleavage, and all subs including me would already be drooling.

Well I now uploaded a picture that is vanilla + a slight chastity theme. I know that most Women don't want to see nude genitals, but I hope safely locked up genitals are OK :-)

I haven't updated the journal for a while, but basically little has changed regarding what I look for. I am still dreaming of a finding the one Dominant Woman to share a female-led relationship with. I would serve, worship and obey her, and together we would try to make her life just perfect!

But it is also becoming clear that realizing my D/s dreams will be hard while working on the current project in Central Asia. So next time I relocate I will have to make sure it is to a land with plenty of Dominant Females...

Therefore, in contradiction to some earlier journal posts, I am also now open to long-distance training (perhaps with a future option of sharing vacations?). And I realize this will involve tribute. It isn't perfect, but I think I'd rather have an imperfect adventure with a Dominant Woman than start dabbling with pure vanilla again, vanilla just doesn't do it for me. So if anyone is willing to take on a submissive pupil for training, let me know. I guess it could involve obedience training, just having me jump through the hoops, humiliation and discipline if it amuses you, and orgasm control. In earlier D/s relationships I have never been allowed to wank freely, and complete freedom just takes away the joy in it. For me only a Female approved orgasm is a real orgasm...

Update; moved to Central Asia in December, due to a new job. Collarme seemingly doesn't recognize the country where I live, so my profile now incorrectly states that I live in Russia...

Before becoming active on CM I used to think that women are very monogamous, and I discarded cuckolding as a male fantasy. Having browsed numerous profiles of Dominant Women I stand corrected. Women want their males to be monogamous, but most of you don't mind some liberty for yourself!

Cuckolding is not something I have actively searched for, but it is no hard limit either. And now having thought about it a bit more I do see it as a logical part of a Femdom/sub relationship. As the Dominant part in a relationship you should have privileges, and I can't see anything morally wrong with having additional sexual partners (for you). I 

do see some risks though, but at the end of the day these risks are for you to consider.

If you meet an attractive male at a party, in the office, at the gym etc, I'd like you to be able to freely flirt with him with the exciting knowledge that if you so wish you can go all the way. If you do so you should not have any moral qualms, you are not doing anything wrong. And unless you want me to I would not expect to be involved in any way, and I guess most potential lovers would prefer to have you for themselves. But I do think it is important that you are upfront about your adventures, as I see it I don't have the right to object, but I do have the right to know (difference between cuckolding and cheating?)

However, I do see some challenges for us and for our relationship, and I would hope that you would seriously consider whether and how to cuckold me. It's your privilege and your choice, but I think it can be very tough for your sub. Ideally I would put away all jealousy and just be happy that you have had an exciting and hopefully satisfying sexual experience. Whatever pleases you should please me. But in practice it may not be so easy for me, unless I feel very secure as your beloved sub and possession...

I'm reducing my CM activity, at least for a while, and as part of that I took away my picture. I will relocate in a couple of months (but within Asia), and maybe I'll resume my search for an owner once I'm settled in...

Nope, I don't see myself as a worm. I don't think I'm worthless. I don't know why anybody would want to be a 'piggy', whatever that includes.

I'm just a guy who wants to put my Woman on a pedestal and serve and obey Her. Can't see why that has to make me a loser...?

About relocation - As my profile states, I am willing to relocate, and I actually will relocate, I just don't know where yet. I'm on a time limited expat contract that will expire next year, but I'm slowly starting to look around, and will do so globally. Staying in Asia is an option, but I could find work on any continent (probably within the same multinational company that I'm working for now).

It occured to me that it may be easier for me to find the next job than to find the right Dominant Female to serve, so it is not clear in what end I should start looking... 

About protocol -

On this site, it's of course up to every Superior Female to choose how She likes to be addressed, but every Domme has different preferences, and unless You for example give instructions in Your profile a sub can only make a guess on what Your preference is. Apologies in advance if I guess wrong!

In a relationship, I guess I'm not heavily into protocol, at least not if it goes as far as to be impractical. I can for sure show my subservient status by crawling at home, but I would much rather do that by providing additional comfort or services to You in some way.

One routine that I do fantasize about is to always greet You by kissing your toes. Don't know why, just think it would be a nice way to greet my Wife/Girlfriend/Owner. And if I come home from the office it would nicely help me switch modes, from a role of authority at work, to servant at home :-)

About pro-Dommes -

I don't see anything wrong in providing professional D/s services, I just don't get kicks out of buying these services myself (especially if charged by the hour - a shared weekend or holiday trip might have more appeal). As I see it my role is to provide services, not buy them.

If I one day will find myself in a relationship where I'm happily owned by my Female partner that ownership would of course include my wallet too. But if this is something very important for you we would probably never get to that stage...