So I have a new one today.  Actually its a reoccurring theme that I haven't bothered to bring up before.  Luckily for me its another one that tweaks my sense of humor rather than any negative emotions.  

So I get this message basically saying this guy either wants to jerk off to my picture or did (grammar wasn't too good) especially as he mentioned my face, and I have no face pictures here (Whoops!).  

Now this is just my opinion, but I don't find that a welcome introduction.  Call me old fashioned if you must.  So needlessly to say I type up a quick snappy retort to make it clear his intentions are unwelcome.  

This is the funny part. 

His reply?  

That I need to get fucked in my fat ugly ass.  

So here's my thing?  If my ass is so fat and ugly, why was he so interested in it in the first place.

Now one could argue  that most men will take anything they can get, and seeing some of the pairings I've seen (with some truly nasty girls I'm sorry to say) I have to believe there is some truth in this.  But still.  Why do girls find this level of immaturity appealing?  

Does it excite them to know that some creep only views them as a (nasty) object to be used?  (Not that I'm dissing objectification) but generally my understanding is that its done with someone who has some understanding of you and your limits, not some guy who just wants a quick fuck any way he can get it.  

This goes to my next question, when did we stop teaching men to be gentlemen and respect women?  Seriously?  No wonder I have no interest in my own generation.

So, this cracks me up.  In the last 24 hours, I've gotten two messages insulting me as fat, ugly, uneducated (really?), and various other charming adjectives.  The reason?  

Supposedly its my profile.  So here is my thing about my profile.

I'm twenty three, reasonably pretty, and I'm built in a way that makes men lust, maybe not all men, but that's okay with me, I have enough trouble with the ones that do like the way I look.  Not to mention I'm a submissive.  

Now to some, and you know who you are, this means because you think you're a Dom, this means I should be kissing your feet and begging for your cock.  You guys should know you're living in a fantasy world.  

I've been in this three years, and I don't mean I've been kneeling by a computer (no offense meant to those who play online, its just not my thing).  I've been out in the real world getting real experience in what it feel like to be hit by a flogger or a paddle or a flaming flail.

I also learned the kind of mindfucks that people I'd call predators will try to do to you.   So yeah, I've built a few defenses.  One of them is knowing exactly what I won't do or settle for.  If you don't like that, well, TOUGH.  I don't need to hear that I've insulted your manhood or whatever.  Frankly you aren't upsetting me, so give it up.  All I'm going to do is laugh and delete your message, unless you've done or said something really stupid, and then I'm going to share it with all my friends so they can laugh at you too.  

I just got randomly attacked...I got a message from some random profile that I've never talked to before.  It said one one word.  

Bullshit.

Misspelled no less.  

In the time it took me to read that (and I'm a speed reader) and click on the profile to try and figure out what the hell is going on, the profile was deleted...and I don't have a clue whats going on.  

I am both amused and rather disgusted.  Grow up.  If you have a problem with my views on something then have the guts to face me.  

Been a little sick lately.  Nothing serious.  Just a cold, but it was bad enough to drown in nightquil for a couple days as sleep was about the best thing I could do for it. 

Anyway I'm thinking about making a serious effort to make this a kind of miniblog, not to discuss world politics or anything boring.  More a journey of self discover.  I have kept journals in the past, I have one now in fact.  But overall, the idea of a private journal seems odd to me.  I know what is in my head, and while writing it out can sometime help me vent, it rarely comes up with a solution to problems.  I'd much rather send such things out into the anonymous void of the web, and see what other people have to say. 

I'm just curious as to who out there actually reads this and would be interested.  It is the unfortunate circumstances of our world, full of facebook and twitter and other internet stardoms of youtube and the like, to make us all a little self centered.  Now this wouldn't be such a bad thing if it also made us self-reflective, but all too many of us, it just makes shallow and petty.  I would hope to avoid those things, by pretending there is someone out there to whom I, would not necessarily justify, but explain my actions, see if maybe I'm not quite as crazy as I think myself to be. 

So if you're out there, listening, well okay reading but still, voice journals may come later, let me know.  Just a quick note.  A hi.  And maybe I'll work on something. 

I bring this up because I found this today:http://houseofvoid.com/2011/11/28/service-book-of-days-112811/

and was intrigued by the idea of just taking each day, or each week, and memorializing the good in it.  Nothing long or complex necessarily, just things to make you happy, to make the stress not so bad.  I really appreciate relaxing things right now.  With finals just over a week away, the stress runs high on campus, and when my own isn't bothering me, the overall tension everywhere is. 

I am so spoiled right now.

I'm home for thanksgiving break, and getting basically everything I want.  We had our first thanksgiving at one of my aunts' on sunday.  There is another one on Thursday, and at some point this week my mom is baking a ham.  Yum! 

Plus ice cream, fudge, brownies, jelly beans, harry potter, Christmas movies, a christmas tree to decorate,  and cuddles and snuggles whenever I want.

I think people discount platonic and familial love way too much.  I have an amazing, if nontraditional family, and curling up on the couch to watch movies together, stealing each other's popcorn and stuff is one of the best times of my life, hands down. 

So whoever is out there reading this, take some time and give your mom/dad/brother/sister/significant other and/or best friend, a huge hug, and let them know you appreciate them. 

Yes I'm being really soppy, deal with it. Appreciate it.  Too many people don't enjoy their life enough.

I have to stop looking at Thinkgeek.com...there are way too many cool t-shirts that I want.  The newest one is the Team Neville one...I love anything Harry potter, and anything that makes fun of Twilight.