angeldmort Haven't written anything in a while, and I had a quiet minute between tasks, so I thought I would write about a recent experience I had out in the wild.
I had done a pop in at a Dollar Tree. I hadn't done anything special that day - no makeup, no sexy clothes, just my vibrant magenta hair and my bright orange mirror sunglasses. Maybe my hand bleached mandala design tank top was cool.
So when a very bald guy walking my way kind of leaned toward me and told me really liked my hair, I said thank you, and casually commented that I also had some hair loss and the bold color helps hide that. He apparently took that as an opening, and asked if I was married, and I said I have a partner, and that we are "complicated." He asked what that meant, and I asked if he knew what polyamory was. He gave a noncommital sound like he wanted to seem like he did, and I followed it with saying that we are always open to new playmates if they are compatible. So he asked me about going for coffee sometime. I said I was open to discussing it and offered him my business card.
Now, I designed my own cards, for goth costuming and art and such. They are mostly black and purple and lacy with gothic lettering.
And they have QR codes on the back to my Etsy and Instagram and email, etc. No numbers.
He looked at it, turning it over and back, like he had no idea what I'd handed him.
He said "Let's skip all that and you give me your phone number."
I said no, I don't really do phone calls.
So he hands me back my card and says "So you aren't really interested. Good luck with all that" and walked away with this smirk like he'd caught me trying to trick him.
At this point in my life, I can look at the whole thing and laugh. This is so common in my expeirence, but its still amusing to watch happen. I was pretty positive this wasn't going anywhere when he first asked, but I was willing to listen to his pitch.
But interested?
No, I was not "interested."
This guy did not look like Jason Momoa. He didn't talk like a heavy intellectual. Nor did he dress like anything more than your average rando - tshirt, long shorts, etc. He hadn't said anything, either, other than asking for my attention. He didn't ooze seduction or ... anything other than averageness, honestly.
He walked up to a total stranger, made the barest effort, divulged nothing of use or value in the 2-3 minutes we spoke, but expected... something more from me. Then when I didn't make up the difference for him, he bailed and wanted to act like I'd led him on somehow with my simple failure to be rude, and basic honesty.
He was *INTERESTED.* He was not in any way *interestING* on the surface. So there was nothing to be interested IN at that point.
But he wanted to be butthurt that I wasn't equally interested in him. I wasn't even snarky about the phone. Just not insecure about saying no. And he tried to turn it into something personal.
Weak men are everywhere. Here, at work, in daily life, etc. Men who want something, and sometimes will profess great interest in getting it, but at the slightest bump, they flail and pout and throw up their hands and play helpless.
Well, except when they decide to get violent about it. Which is why I carry pepper spray on my keys and a stun gun in my purse.
There's a tictok video where a woman expresses her frustration with men who want to complain that women all want '6 foot, 6 figure, 6 pack' and all we REALLY want is for you to be nice to us and feed us tacos. She's not wrong.
And I have a whole profile outlining what I want, and what I don't want, as well as countless journal entries laying out how to avoid pissing off me, and every Domme I know. And yet...
It doesn't have to be this hard, guys.
Just don't expect us to make all the effort for you.