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herdingcats
 Couple, 46/63, California 
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herdingcats

Given that it’s been the better part of a decade since we last revised our profile, coupled with an improved understanding on our parts regarding what we’re willing to entertain (and perhaps more critically, wish to avoid) we’ve elected to delete our previous profile in favor of constructing something from whole cloth – although in doing so we find that at least some things have remained relatively constant.

As with our past profile, this is by design going to take a moment to read; if you can’t be bothered, we’re grateful that you’ve self-selected yourself out of further consideration ;)

We’re J & C; we’re a highly stable dominant couple of close to three decades whose relationship was designed from the outset to include the possibility of others in the context of relationships incorporating power exchange. We’ve had some notable successes over the years, and while geography coupled with people having non-portable careers or family obligations have conspired to deny us the sort of permanent, full-time, relationship that we’d prefer, we remain well connected to most of those with whom we were more closely involved in the past.

In the vanilla world we’re highly successful and can generally choose how we spend our time. We’re highly active polymaths possessed of a wide range of interests and multiple advanced degrees who would much rather be outdoors than in, and prefer exploring, learning, inventing, teaching, and creating to sitting around in front of a television. Having cashed out of Silicon Valley years ago, we make our primary residence on our several hundred-acre retreat in the mountains of Northeastern California, a place selected in part for the availability of four seasons recreation literally out our door. This makes Northern California and Northern Nevada most geographically proximate, although we’ve maintained long term relationships with people located in SoCal, NZ, the UK, and Central Europe, and would clearly consider doing so again.

On the kink side we’re both quite capable dominants and skilled edge players with respect to both the physical and mental aspects of power exchange, although we do work hard not to exceed the limitations of those we are with. We readily admit that we both find the mind of the submissive to be our preferred playground and find the assumption of responsibility to be the more interesting aspect of power exchange – and as such we believe that it falls to us to provide the consistent safety, standards, motivation, support, education, and discipline necessary for those we call ours to achieve their greatest potential in all aspects of life.

We come to this place in the hopes of meeting worthwhile people and, should we be fortunate enough to do so, seeing how we all might fit into each other’s lives. This has generally been our attitude for decades, as part experience informed that looking for something too specific blinded us to other worthwhile opportunities. That said, there are certain things that we’ve observed over the years that provide some useful hints:

We do exceptionally well with:

• Smart, curious, and articulate people, be it singles, couples, or larger groups. • Creative types (subject to the note below), and those who enjoy geeking out over things. • People who enjoy the outdoors, almost without regard to the activity in question. • Explorers and travelers.

• People who share our professional interests in technology or science. Not only does this offer the opportunity for professional collaborations, but there’s something calming about being able to describe just how screwed a situation is by shared metaphor (particularly if it’s rooted in references to Python skits or Mel Brooks films).

• Tradespeople. We spend a lot of our professional lives in esoteric corners of technology and science, so many of our avocations are found in working with our hands. Consequently, we do extremely well with mechanics, carpenters, metalworkers, cabinet makers, electricians, farmers, ranchers, and the like. It doesn’t hurt that’s there’s something hot about a woman with dirt or grease under her fingernails.

• Aviators (one of our avocations) and motorsport types (another avocation).

We have a slight preference for the 30-and-up set, because they are more likely capable of undertaking commitments than someone younger, but at the same time there’s something undeniably attractive about the rare opportunity to fundamentally shape someone into something both exceptionally capable in the vanilla world and uniquely capable of meeting our needs. Being an early 20-something isn’t disqualifying, but experience suggests a certain amount of life experience and emotional maturity are needed for durable power exchange relationships, and those things are often a function of chronological age.

We have a very slight preference for existing and demonstrably stable couples where at least one member of the couple identifies as a switch, sub, or slave. This preference is derived from the observation that even numbers of people seem to be slightly more stable, and that long term stability is easier to achieve when everyone has a primary partner, but we stress that this preference is a slight one.

We do poorly with:

• People who want 24/7 dehumanization. It’s one thing to be a pet, it’s another to be full-time livestock.

• People who want a full-time relationship but only offer their bodies in return. A kink-and-sex-only relationship is fine for something designed to be only that and limited to once a month or once a quarter, but sex and kink are easy to find and only occupy perhaps 10% of life; if you want a full-time investment of time and energy on our parts it’s necessary to show up in some capacity in the 90% that isn’t about sex and kink.

• People who require television to survive or have no ambition beyond sitting on the couch all day.

• People with an aversion to self-improvement. Almost the entire corpus of human knowledge is available for free on the Web, but most people spend their time shitposting on social media and participating in flame wars. Seriously, do better.

• People who have issues keeping commitments. As a sort of special case of this, people cheating on their spouses.

• People who have made a hot mess out of their lives and are hoping to trade a little mildly kinky sex in exchange for someone fixing everything.

• Those lacking the maturity to understand what they’re asking for, or the consequences of finding it.

A note on creative types: Over the years we’ve had an unusual number of people from the other side of the Velvet Rope come into our lives in the form of actors and television personalities. This isn’t inherently a problem, but it’s important to be up-front about the interaction between that and geography. There’s nothing wrong with a Surf Air subion to deal with commuting between here and SoCal, but if you have to be in studio at 0500 to be the morning news co-anchor the reality is that we’re going to be on video calls in the afternoon while you (or we) weekend commute, and if you’re going to be on location it may be weeks before we can sort logistics to see each other. This is bad enough in vanilla relationships but can be crippling for someone who we’ve enslaved. A note on geography: While we do not consider proximity to be an indicator of the qulity or importance of a relationship, geography needs to be approached rationally and should factor into negotiations.

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evilDomina
 
 Age: 18
 ---, Texas