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Maybeher

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Friends:
KinkyMaster69

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Really not open to messages from couples. Specifically into blk, Hispanic, or native american D types. 40 - 60. I'm not the teasing type, I rather be seduced. Seeking a faithful, attentive, honest, and mature, gentle but strict and micromanaging man for me to serve, dedicate to, cuddle, grow with, and love.
Interested in Ms and DDbg. I love attention and affection.
Someone to put me first while i put him first and protect me while i am focused on him.
Im ready to commit for the right fit.

The right fit appreciates that i like nature, learning new things, and knows how to unplug from the phone. He or she has time to invest like i do if theres chemistry.

Physically, personality comes first but I like either medium or athletic build a little tummy is nice on some. Old pics will likely totally turn me off unless its for career reasons. I like those that care for their hair or shave it off. If you shave your balls or groin i will shave my cookie for you.

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1/21/2022 4:55:18 AM

When it seems someone I am talking to has lost interest or what have you I just back off. Nothing has to be said. They don't owe me anything, we are just chatting. Now if meets, and dating has occurred that's different. 


12/19/2021 3:59:59 AM

Many on here are so picky about their girls appearance..

 The same picky ones get on here with RY, OUTDATED, AND OR HATS, SHADES,  AND DIRTY LOOKING PICS. They want a maintained women but haven't shaved or trimmed the hair or beard in forever. 

If you want a well groomed partner, BE well groomed. If you want a classy lady BE a classy gentleman. 

Upgrade yourself before trying to upgrade or downgrade us. 

Laziness is a turn off.

 


12/18/2021 7:28:02 PM

Moving from NC is a tad scary but I'm cool 

Hope I can make friends and new loved ones 


12/10/2021 6:27:12 PM

I'm glad this is back. 

Well updates... the former died it'll be one year Xmas eve. I miss him so much especially now. I was dating a nilla that I thought was Dom but o well. . 


4/21/2018 7:38:29 AM
It's funny when guys dont realize some of this is random thinking and some is past and some is just... What i write is mine, not every entry will be the same nor will i explain or clarify anything unless we're cool. Why? Because taking the tine to explain it to someone i don't really talk to and already at their own conclusion isn't advantageous to me and while unowned thats my focus: me, my comfort, my health, etc and when I'm not focused on that maybe others will and those are the ones I'll focus on answering to. See all that reciprocity up in there lol In other news i was beasting on the paddle boats.

4/19/2018 10:04:12 AM
Please send good vibes for tomorrow. Thanks and no not including why because I'm being a big girl.

4/18/2018 2:46:05 PM
A modest humble jealous nurturing guiding control freak? Easy right, nope the humble modest part is rare even in vanillas. I like men like that because I'm an ego stroker. If your ego is stroked by you or small actions it's a huge turn off. One guy messaged me and seemed super humble but super dominant, he doesn't seem to be on a lot. Kind of standoffish and i have been a chaser years back but nowadays if someone is interested I know if they pursue me.

4/18/2018 10:24:26 AM
I no fewl good

4/16/2018 10:30:25 PM
I've only uttered Master to one Papa to one other Eh I'm a trip so I've said daddy to a host more but in the end when I said or moaned papa it meant something if I cried or giggled or whispered Master it meant something. This is not a game, although sometimes I get played, this is not a game. Yes I've had potentials but i kept it private. yes I had false starts kept it private. That's why sometimes or lots of times I seem ok or even content unowned. Instead of being owned and wondering, stressing, feeling neglected, or missing whoever, or being taken for granted... I get to be at peace, occasionally smile from a memory, and continue. I have faith I'll belong again and when I do it'll be just as special but moreso because I'll have good warm owned feelings with peace on top. That will be amazing, and new, and genuine. I'm going to turn on audible, settle in, and dream of peace within ownership. Something rare but so priceless to me.

4/12/2018 9:13:16 PM
to me apologies mean a lot. I don't wait for or expect them, but if you do, say, or post brutal or cruel things especially for no reason and expect to even be an associate or for me to half way care after it, an acknowledgement at the very least is going to have to occur otherwise... Time doesn't make wrong stuff less wrong. I'll talk to the person maybe but I'm not likely going to care about them. Before any friends get offended I don't mean saying things that irk me or I feel are insensitive. I'm talking things many people wouldn't forgive or things there's no way to explain away. No one is beyond apologizing when they know they are wrong regardless of label. what inspired this? two people did the same type of things. One owned it and acknowledged it, so I didn't hold it on him. Someone brought it up so I addressed it.

4/10/2018 8:45:32 PM
I can SSSSMEEELLLL dominance even with the softest touch

4/8/2018 6:15:33 PM
who is taking me to see Incredibles 2

4/4/2018 10:15:38 AM
I'm pretty playful and sensitive so I like serious types. Picking at me or humiliating me without my consent will be ignored without discussion.

4/4/2018 9:10:04 AM
I AM NOT HERE FOR CYBER OR ROLE PLAY! It does NOTHING AT ALL FOR ME. What am I looking to do? message, then possibly move to phone, then possibly move to meeting. also I don't care how crazy it sounds if you're in NC (the state I'm in) I'm only interested if you're 28 - 45. Yes I'm serious, very serious.

3/31/2018 7:19:59 PM
If you don't believe me watch They brag on how i suck cock I still need lessons in fucking, i hear I'm selfish with the pussy But if you have the flow i promise to get gushy I'll just say no if your approach is too pushy I'm a sucker for attention I move slowly to offer submission Put me in a secure position I'll collapse Does this attract your grip? Lands on my tits As you make them yours You permit I grab your dick Stroking back and forth You grip my tits more Said you like my nipples well I've heard that before Do you wanna hurt them? They've been neglected too long Pantyless is typical and farmers hate thongs So i rock bikini or boyshorts for days Maybe you'll own me and I'll do as you say But for now i flirt It's spring for mini skirts Dudes taking my phone saying "text me it won't hurt" Are you a control freak? I can take the heat Do you get a little jealous within your territory If so maybe I could be Your slutty little shy piece of destiny Ya feel me?

3/27/2018 6:27:48 PM
More are writing on profiles of cum on command. No judgement because there was long ago i didn't think it was possible but about 6 yrs ago we went there, did that, and got the sopping wet t shirt soooo if that's your selling point, try again. Yes, i get training a girl the way you want her to be, but some things stick. Orgasm control on command comes along with this package. Cumming without physical stuff has always been me for as long as i can remember. That doesn't mean the real thing isn't preferred. I don't do online. It just means there's so many other areas i need work like... behavior mods lol

3/25/2018 3:36:23 AM
I think I want a glammed up cage. Like really comfy and off the ground but still spacious not like that typical one floating around online. On the other hand I'm still used to sleeping wrapped in arms. With Pa or former I was always intertwined while sleeping. One slept with my legs wrapped around his and the other slept with me on his chest. I never take sleeping closely with a Master i love for granted. it's a joy and a reward i love it. It's a safe feeling. especially compared to being on the floor.

3/21/2018 5:51:27 PM
tip: telling me what's hard to control via distance... all it does is make me think of all the stuff that was controlled via distance. I'm not a fan of distance but blaming it instead of yourself is a turn off to me. Distance was a negative factor why pursue anything then? If you couldn't control the person be genuine enough to admit that. if you get s types that won't obey without you always being right there it's what it is. Distance isn't to blame when it comes to control in my opinion. The people involved are. don't get me wrong, I don't obey if we never have real time or I don't belong to you, but if I'm yours you can be in Timbuktu a week and I'm still gonna say ok Sir. I'm probably cursing you out in my head for being far away but that's not the point. distance can get old but that's another story on the other hand if you're in Timbuktu what'd ya leave me for dangit??!!? the above isn't to any one person it's in general about what I've experienced

3/21/2018 5:36:45 PM
wanna micromanage your s types eating habits some like my fitness pal but I'm loving the lose it app. you can track steps and create calorie specifics. if taking pics is too time consuming this app is good. plus you can get a feel for what they eat and pick from that so no calling to ask. I personally like the calling to ask but life can get busy. doms complaining about their partner's weight have less excuses now.

3/19/2018 6:30:42 PM
if getting to know me is like pulling teeth we just aren't compatible

3/17/2018 3:18:06 PM
tip: profiles complaining of fakes don't get the attention of actual fakes. they make genuine potentials sigh from boredom. I get it's tough but why waste others time by ranting about not wanting fakes? If I read that stuff on profiles from messages I'm not replying. Get a stuffie good buddy

3/12/2018 7:53:18 PM
My sex drive isnt generally low or high If I'm feeling you it's high If I'm not, it's not

3/12/2018 7:34:50 PM
Picking out clothes is fine Washing your car is enjoyed Guiding your little ones if you have them is cool Bathing you is something I'd love Massaging you turns me on Holding your hand is comfy Of course the naughty stuff but simple stuff is important too Getting interested in your career Sharing some hobbies Visiting new places Being active in the community together That's big stuff i look forward too. There's more Just ask If I'm interested I'll tell you Experience me... Find my strengths fron real time and encourage me Embrace my weaknesses and motivate me

3/10/2018 7:56:37 PM
Nice, clean, good-smelling trucks are a major turn on: rigs, pick ups, dullies lol work trucks, not firetrucks lol

3/8/2018 8:15:27 AM
The guys here complain of fakes and liars. We girls complain of hiders, users, and unattractive options. So why do we continue to come here. Some say entertainment but then i wonder is life really that boring that people find dealing with disingenuous people to be entertaining? A few of us still use it because we have hope. Hope that maybe a certain message will come from the person(s) we're meant to spend a fulfilling joyful dynamic with. Stupid or hopeful, who knows? Those that I'm cool with don't get me wrong. Friends are appreciated but I'm not on here to make friends or new chat buddies or to help finish off horniness, or just for you to get an ego stroke. I was kinda open to... passion, control, warmth, structure, and maybe longevity. Maybe in lifestyle terms a few years with people that are probably attached and living this as an outlet is as close as it gets to longevity. Again if thats the case why get on here... i think it could simply be habit. I get on here and see pics with often terrible quality from guys that aren't hwp desiring a girl that is hwp and has effort to give. Theres guys on here making 5, 6, or 8k a month or more trying to use or get over on s types financially. There's married guys having girls humiliate themselves without their consent by having them write essays on TRUST and not assuming when the assumptions are correct every time. Even with all that... Somehow i still open the message section and hope for deserving potentials. Hope for smiles, gentleness, guidance, dominance, allegiance and transparency at least about things they know will matter to me. In exchange for dedication, service, adoration, effort, and maybe mutual love, trust, and passion. Maybe I was confused. Maybe i really expected too much. Sometimes s types expect a lot because they give a lot. I don't expect anything in the beginning. I feel D types will SHOW me what i can expect and if i like it i proceed. So today I'm here to express the difference between hope and reality. Having and wanting. Expectations are based on my experience with the person. Wants are based on my desires.

3/2/2018 5:32:58 AM
I miss morning cuddles.

3/1/2018 10:36:31 PM
How do you dress your s for Cons? Does she ever attend alone?

2/28/2018 12:31:40 AM
Hug me Kiss me Grope me Even when I'm lonely i know where I'm going To your arms Safe from harm Unless you cause it D oh I think you already know How my body feels When under your control Take me slow-ly No one gets to see How deep I'm willing To go You know So... Hold Me

2/26/2018 7:06:46 AM
Leash nice and short I like the extra support When i look up to you it's not because I'm short It's because you deserve it Comfort me when I'm hurting And as i suckle your dick somehow you get me squirting Clamp down a bit when you catch me being flirty I really love it when you start talking dirty Are you sadistic? If I'm yours I'll ask you to hurt me Have you walking stiff dicked while you're busy working They say I'm a trip you say I'm a journey I can handle it as long as we both keep learning

2/25/2018 6:12:33 PM
So many D types like grouping others, putting down others, or talking bad anout others in comparison to self. If they'd speak on self and focus on them and their world we s types may be more interested. The men that have had me in any way, rarely if ever exhibit that behavior... Please avoid getting me wrong, if someone is a dick say so, but why use it as a time to say well i on the other hand... Why tell me how you're different, when showing me is better? I will stroke an ego like it's a 9 inch cock, but if you're busy stroking your own, my interest quickly halts.

2/25/2018 1:51:05 PM
Me saw peter rabbit. Would have been better with a Daddy person but eh well bossy nilla people count too i guess.

2/25/2018 9:33:17 AM
If i had a nickel for each time a dude on here suggested a girl wasn't a slave lol. The same guys often don't know the girl they are talking about. I know what I've done under ownership. heck i know what I've done with potentials. More importantly i know who i am. So... yea... Girls don't let these guys shake you Especially nc guys lol

2/21/2018 6:37:02 PM
Imho submission isn't a gift And if you always have to be spanked to behave or remain submissive ya might be a SAM not a sub I'm just saying Don't get me wrong i love certain reactions but if i belong it doesn't take that for me to behave

2/20/2018 8:38:37 AM
My body safe in your embrace as you say i feel just right Affection as i taste each drop each night Submission only for you and your delight or maybe others hehehe Trust that we thought giving wouldn't be bright Enjoyment traveling together or talking late into the night Reality surpassing books that kinky people write so ready to please laying at your feet always trying to make you cheese or smile vulnerability enjoying the chemistry

2/20/2018 8:22:51 AM
Deep kisses Attention Dominance Discipline Yanking hair Being shy Always trying to please Behaving Your naughty thing Grateful Interested in you Rebellious a tad Loving

2/16/2018 10:03:52 PM
I'm sensitive so toying with emotions just isn't me. Name calling or cursing at someone that hasn't done it first just isn't me. Having time to see how someone feels about me but not sharing how i feel about them and thinking it's right just isn't me. I deserve someone a bit like me in that way. What matters to me a lot? How someone controls self when they aren't happy with me. Being nice and talking about control is so easy when you're in a good mood. Walking the walk is harder.

2/14/2018 8:21:10 PM
Potentials are landmarks letting you know you're getting closer to your destination.

2/13/2018 8:17:50 AM
If you are a Captain Sav-A to s types or colleagues or relatives that just use you please pass me by. Do i want a knight, sure i do, but a personal one that looks after those in his charge because he knows they look out for him. Not one that runs around trying to Save people, at their own risk or ends up being used or is so focused saving people that have screwed them over that they forget those in their charge. I have enough save the world vibe in myself, I need a Master or Daddy STRONGER than me mentally not one cowering or turning on me when I'm looking out for them. I know wanting someone with that strength will be hard to find. especially since i don't desire a man that's running around using others without their full knowledge and agreement. No sneaky users and no ones being used. It's that simple. The signs are usually there. I just gotta poof as soon as i see them. Sometimes i don't and every time i regret it. Family, work, and partners are important, but look at how they treat you and ask yourself how are they treating me? Are they or have they put in the same effort I'm giving? On the other side ask yourself have i put in the effort they give me? If not consider a transition from Saving others to fixing your relationships.

2/10/2018 9:32:44 AM
Firm ass small tits large nipples. If that's not your desire my apologies. 36, 26, 37 1/2

2/10/2018 7:45:36 AM
Faq that some of us are annoyed and bored with How long have you been in the lifestyle? Sigh people can be in this for 20 yrs and still be immature dingbats. What are your limits? I get my limit may be your love but why not let it come out naturally in conversation instead of asking. Can i have a pic? Lead by example and offer some (clothed ones) What do you do? In the first conversation?? How deep is your throat? Most vulgar question a guy has ever asked in first conversation Why don't you give me a chance? Us communicating IS your chance

2/9/2018 4:47:12 PM
In the woods In the snow In the thunder In the sprinkle of the northern lights There Was Us Hunting Caressing Dancing Kissing Moaning Smiling Learning Living Paris in springtime We call it

2/8/2018 10:00:06 PM
Consistency is key. Not to the point you get bored but to the point where trust or dependency can form. I don't see depending on each other as a bad thing. For me it takes time, but if i say i have your back i mean it. Just would love a man to massage at night and look up to in the day and not only because he's taller lol.

2/8/2018 12:26:26 PM
Some signs enjoy arguing i don't. If you suddenly change how you treat someone they have the right to change their mind about meeting. In other news my tummy is almost better, i hope. Cursing and name calling isn't mature. Some people should really grow up smh.

2/8/2018 5:54:27 AM
What are you all doing for Single Awareness Day? I don't wanna hear that everyday is VDay stuff. I no like putting myself out there and being toyed with emotionally. What part of sensitive don't yall understand. At least this one was a quick ouch. I'm a trooper and I'm still staying positive. Tip: when I'm not feeling well i like being looked after even if I'm the s type. Having me pour out my feelings and then distancing isn't nice. Not even calling to tell me safe travels or good night. Before saying you like a characteristic make sure you can actually Show you like it. I look at actions before words. I'm about to keep my feelings inside in the beginning thats what i learned. I swear older men are grrreat at teaching me life lessons, why it always has to hurt isn't clear to me. I didn't cry this time. Leans back...

2/7/2018 9:38:42 PM
If it took me a minute to return your message my bad. The rare occasion i think there's mutual chemistry i like to focus and see what's up and sometimes I'm left feeling ditzy or naive, but i always learn a lesson and thank goodness it's always a different lesson. Bittersweet, but it's better to quit while ahead.

2/7/2018 6:45:41 PM
Someone asked what i want for my bday if you don't know when it is it's not your business yet. I told him Me: i want a man's full attention and to just be me in his palace. No critiques, no technology, no ego stuff. But the one person i know would give the technology and palace desire takes a whole day of flying to get to, no way around it. Him: his palace? Me: yes his own home just us there. In the lifestyle it's not common. I want space to be free. I want the freedom to be there without any issues. Him: you wanna be there all day? Me: i want the option of it but of course i might wanna go out too for wall climbing or something Him: you don't ask for much do ya Me: ...what is much... Him: drink your cappuccino silly girl A trucker friend asked the same thing... My response "Camp out in the Poconos" yaaaay bounces around He said i was crazy I've been through there more times than i can count but I've never been TO there.

2/7/2018 6:06:41 PM
Work work work all this work... I don't recall M/s being work. I think if communication falls or info is withheld or games are played intentionally or not, it falls. I don't see it as work.

2/7/2018 10:50:39 AM
It's funny when guys on here obviously ones that have pent up sexual frustration from not being laid in forever decide to tell me i don't know what a slave is. The things they are forgetting are: the word consensual before slavery AND I'm currently UNOWNED so naturally my mindset isn't the same. It just makes them look stupid.

2/7/2018 9:56:21 AM
Anyone doing fantasy baseball let me know when time gets closer. Some of you also promised me edutainment via mlb games so I'm up for it. In other news In my opinion doggystyle is one of the MOST disconnected positions ever created besides that both legs up thing like really wth? So if those are your favorites ah the beauty of open relationships lol one girl for those positions and one man for close passionate loving grudge fucking oh yes. See both people are happy lol.

2/6/2018 7:13:55 AM
So in March I'm hitting Ft Lauderdale for blue water for the second weekend. I think that's what I've decided on. If you call that area home or "just vacation there" let me know what's happening. I wanna catch some sun and maybe deep sea.

2/4/2018 4:11:38 PM
I started the day strong now i feel so weak. I'm going to show my face at this superbowl thing, and hopefully lay back down. A cane spanking would be nice im already weak so no running away lol. With the rain suckling would be nice too and a shared bubble bath, a girl can dream lol. It's cold out here this mini rose up and my butt cheeks were like snowcones. I wish i could get my ben wa balls in sheesh then again i haven't tried since i first got them. I'll write readers later. By the way I'm sometimes shocked when D types that have literally in real time, straight faced, tried to wife me hop on here like "I'm not into babygirls" that's all well and good because I'm slave first, but they weren't saying that when... well... ya get the picture. One did explain. He basically said "theres a new wave of babygirls. Most of us don't mean the ones like you that see it as more emotional bonding. The not interested is to the spoiled brats" Ok, but at the same time these same types wanting all this service wanna betray trust or not feel there's any expectations of them. Cool, because i don't expect anything. I let actions show me what to expect. If you don't want spoiled brats why not be specific. I don't just put a blanket of no married guys, i specify no hidden wives i should add no hidden partners at all. Some of you make it hard for a girl to keep the trust in the few straight up ones out there, but oh well. Timberlake did ok but this dude started spanking his girl (not me i don't know the chick) so i wasn't focused. I'm ready to rest and chill til i get sleepy.

2/4/2018 4:32:38 AM
If i lay in your arms Can you keep me from danger Control my middle's attitude correct me like a wrangler Make it easy for me to conclude that I'm not a serial dater Can you? Crop my tits just because You want me to learn How deep a thud can probe even when it's not earned How much you really care even while you're stern The way life isn't always fair but with you maybe i won't get burned Can you? Put me under interrogation just to be clear Motivate me to pick up envelopes that I've heard i push And teach me why strange guys shouldn't grope even if it feels good Support me on my side even while i kneel on wood Can you? Be brave enough to moan if my throat is pleasing Even if you're upset display proof that you won't just ghost Slide in me and as i cry start doing the most Then take a moment to choke me just so i feel your control Can you Rule my word with a gentle hand Believe that i might flirt a little but I'm focusing That my effort often triples with I note sincerity And if we cum or come together maybe it's destiny Can you

1/31/2018 9:07:49 AM
Taking a second for brunch... I was thinking... What makes a sex slave to you? See i always looked at it as not really possible unless the bad way. In bdsm i don't really see how someone could be... Then i think about my life and experience and... idk If mentally you're just that connected where sexually you do whatever he wishes and sometimes have to ask a few days later in my best urkel voice "did i do THAT?" Maybe sex slave is the title for it. I guess to me... it just seems so boxing. So closed off. So one dimensional. That hasn't been my experience. There was always other purposes for me to serve. Always... Maybe it's just me being literal. The meanies that know me would agree. Maybe just the word... The literal meaning of sex just because you're a slave or being a slave just because of the sex is what messes up my thinking... Only got on to throw this out there and see what people are thinking.

1/30/2018 9:09:11 PM
I will take the advice of going slowly Been unowned for years so its not about being lonely. I know when i feel it so when I'm giggling... It's because... I hear passion in your silence I'm not saying if i like it A chance to see what's there Sir, you are invited. Tenderness and care i might be delighted To offer Why bother? Because is my reason This might be the season For something amazing The heat could be blazing Fire and water mixes To a boil I'm saying If that's the case i guess we'll make it hot I'll go slow and find out If it's bad i won't be shocked If it happens to be good I'll be pleasamtly surprised I guess I'll try to be good, go ahead and close my eyes I might happen to dream... Of a bit of breath play or you cropping my thighs Clinging to your hand as tears fall from my eyes

1/26/2018 3:35:29 PM
Back in nc... Now where to Note: to me if we naturally feel something we can build on that as long as their aren't a zillion outside people in the mix or distrust being established. If we don't feel anything (meaning both of us vibing) there's no reason to force anything. If one of us mistreats the other and talking it through isn't mutually advantageous there's no point. That's my stand. Tip: to those that love the "give it a chance" phrase if someone is communicating with you and it's not in an angry manner that IS your chance. I'm a believer in talking things out, but i will not chase or always be the one to try to solve issues. Tip: i can be a sucker for gentleness so instead of dwelling on negative stuff, telling me something warm and endearing is a way to get me wrapped around your leash lol.

1/21/2018 7:48:15 PM
Put me on my belly Just so you can wet me You know i stay ready They just wanna test me You claim that I'm sexy No matter the setting I have fun just testing The lines I can cross I like when doms go off The handle just a bit Grab me or throw a fit Growl or squeeze my tits Yea... daddy that's just it Then I'll suck your dick Just remember to moan There shouldn't be silence unless I'm in bed alone What do you think of the zone As i whimper and suck out your groans? I like a bit of temper but watch the tone My little side is quite tender are you able to hone The skill of gentleness With control that i won't resist If so let me know simply with An action that will show you're serious

1/20/2018 8:02:06 PM
I don't have a race preference, but if you're black spare me the typical nasty attitude chip on your shoulder. If you're white spare me the "im a white man" arrogance. I'll be me and hopefully you'll be you.

1/20/2018 7:58:36 PM
Dominant doesn't mean self centered submissive doesn't mean selfless If you were one of the ones messaging me about the dark profile, you'll be ignored. I do that occasionally and intentionally for a good reason and it works. So it will be repeated.

1/19/2018 7:50:56 PM
Yall dont have to click on the profile to read the journal Not sure why i stay seeing the same people viewed my profile but we never talk... awkward

1/19/2018 6:36:18 PM
Lol guys on here are being so odd tonight And they say us girls act crazy

1/19/2018 2:53:25 PM
I promised my domme friend a snow amgel lol i gotta make one It's almost February when it arrives that'll be that. I feel a year is ample opportunity for anyone to fix, or undo whatever they wish for the most part.

1/18/2018 9:55:11 PM
Tits hurt from upper body workout and snow shoveling. I still didn't get to make mi snowwy person.

1/17/2018 5:01:04 PM
There are two ways to easily read my profile if it really matters. Right now to me... shrugs Just talk to me without being braggy or a jerk and you'll get to know me.

1/16/2018 5:26:49 PM
Asking questions with assumptions added or making assumptions so i can respond with information to increase your security is a huge turn off for me, and it will NOT go the way people think it will. Even though i have a middle side i am still an adult woman and i deal with adult men so if we're interested in each other ASK me if you have a question. No need to voice an assumption expecting me to give you information. It's manipulative, insulting, and stressful and straight up immature. It goes against the whole "peaceful vibe". If i don't wanna answer I'll say so but if you assume I'll ignore it, amd probably you. Immaturity is met with just that. In other news, who wants to be my valentine? Someone posted about the blowjob alphabet... this is one of those times i should have a daddy to protect me from myself lol. Licks lips... Hehehe rubs palms together. Vegas or Atlantic City or something... This is a moment where the daddy backhands you asking if you've lost your mind.

1/14/2018 9:35:51 AM
Finding compatible partners in all this isn't easy, but i know it's possible. I've done it, more than once. This winter has been lovely. I've actually enjoyed the chilly weather. Even the sunny 5 degree days. I hope everyone has found some joy in this new year.

1/13/2018 8:14:38 PM
I'm not into online Not sure how clear i can be on that

12/30/2017 3:00:42 PM
Why are daddies trying to woo me with sippy cups and pacifiers? I'm NOT that little and no offense, but those are cheap i can buy my own. This isn't about accessories for me. Yea daddies in the past got me stuff (i got them stuff too) but we didn't revolve around "stuff". Accessories aren't what makes me a babygirl. The protection, emotions, cuddles, dealing with my naivety, shyness, and wayward moments in REAL TIME not online is more valued and genuine for me. You can hate me and still buy coloring books and onesies. One person rarely ever has time for me but has a bunch of stuff at their place for me. I value longevity and attention and safety. Don't think i don't like stuff, i do but it's not what will get me to be yours.

12/15/2017 10:49:25 PM
Attitude is almost EVERYTHING. I thought i recognized this guy from a past relationship, so i messaged him last month which i rarely do. He checked me out and no response. He looks today and his updated pic let me know he wasn't who i thought he was. I guess my pic update made him more interested. His message basically was like hi I'll get back to you later in the day. As a first message, after ignoring my month old message because my old default wasn't as clear or had more clothes? Uh lol no, no you won't, it's not necessary. It's not always what you say or type, but how you say and type it. I'm big on gentleness and being tactful, whether you want service or bj or a date. Doesn't mean kiss my butt, not at all. It means i see strength in gentleness. Idc attitudes get a result of idc from me. Reciprocity people Control the mind and the body will follow. It can really be sooooo easy

12/14/2017 9:13:34 PM
Old people would say grudges aren't good because you'll put energy into having issue with someone and they may have NO IDEA you do or why you do have those feelings. They were right. If I have issue I tell the person and it's out there so they know. I don't get having issue and not telling them or waiting until later lol people are dying everyday life is too short and time is too precious. Do what's necessary while we're here is my opinion. Unless they've shown telling them will do nothing. That's when i forgive for my own development. Again, not expecting the right one(s) from this site, but when we meet that'll be one huge key to our longevity: saving time by talking things out or informing the other we are bothered and need a bit to digest. I think that's beautiful. With each year i get closer to knowing what its going to take and that warms my heart. Just because i dont expect longevity here doesn't mean I've given up. It means I'm opening more to other areas. Stay hopeful Night

12/13/2017 7:19:18 PM
Happy holidays to the legally single or openly poly people out there. Have a great new year

12/1/2017 10:01:59 AM
UPDATE
NOT trying to meet men and their other chicks right now. Are you active in the community in NC or GA and may want someone to go to events with? If so let me know.
Are you a lover of cuddles, spankings, Ifso, let me know.
Are you a trucker or business man that comes through NC a lot and could use a girl to do your laundry or make you a good meal or, lay a little brown skin service on you: bath, massage, foot rub, and maybe, just maybe a blow job? Without the complications and emotions that sex brings (I don't care if you screw whoever).
After a few years off and on with cs, no D types I click with have led to any longevity.? I'm not expecting it from this site anymore.

What I expect is my consent to be respected. This entry has nothing to do with the one memtioning riding otr.
If you message me due to this post, please start your message with the word Update, so I already know what's going on.

11/27/2017 12:55:46 PM
lol yea I'm totally aware of what micromanagement entails... Mentioning it in the first message isn't likely to get me anywhere near it with you unless you say some other amazing stuff with it.

11/27/2017 11:30:58 AM
I just fantasized of a man putting my safety and emotional well being first. I've never had that before, but it was a nice fantasy.
He was working out a plan for us to spend 2 years and if things didn't go right or I needed space I could go home.
If things did go right we'd proceed with a goal he had. Within that two years he also had non sexual goals for me.
Physically he was what I fantasized and dreamt about as a teen which didn't matter that much so I won't describe him.
Career wise he was in a field I love, but was going to move out of it in 2 years to put down some roots.
He was so strong, so so gentle, so protective, and very dominant and controlling.
I'm talking chokes because he "thought" I was looking at another guy and then kisssed me when I said no Sir.
It was nice... Really nice...

11/25/2017 6:26:41 PM
I just wanna keep you cummin
I'm not interested in runnin'
Anything, but your stamina down down down 
I want you thinkin' "she's a lover I'm really glad I found" 
Teach me to be a daddy fucker and beg you to pound... me deep
The heat just makes you wanna meet, me again
If you win 
It's been proven 
Time and time again
I love hard
I've got heart
And when it comes to anal I cry like a bitch when it first starts
So just hold me tightly
Take it if it's yours rightfully
Lace me with some cuddles and throw me in a nightie
If you want
Yeah I've got stunts
In other words I misbehave
Occasionally
If a tight leash isn't hanging from me
To you
If run is what that makes, you wanna do
You're not the one



11/21/2017 5:26:27 PM
One of my little friends (I'm actually mad at him right now so whatever) but anyway he collects pacies because he likes the colors. Well today I was looking at ben wa balls... Ya you guessed it I really wanna collect them because... All the pretty colors. When I was owned I'd see something colorful or bright and just run to it like oooo it's pretty and while I was getting fussed at for running off my defense was either but but it was sooo shiiiiinyyyy or "I wasn't that far" some people think hearing my voice get high is my little side showing, you have no idea lol.
So back to the balls... Should I get them? Oddly I can see me sucking them instead of inserting them but oh well.  So the first few sets are different types of blue and one set is pink Bounces up and down
Idle humor... I've noticed lately if I'm kinda interested in someone I ask them to pick my polish colors and if I stop talking to them I scrub it off with a passion, like somehow they know or it'll bother them LMAO how juvenile oh well I'm a babygirl what do you expect. 

11/21/2017 1:09:01 PM
So this whole toy thing... One part of me wants to be nice and tight in front and back hole for the future person(s) to gently stretch. The other side knows I can be fickle and wants naughtiness and practice for fun if i remain free a bit longer.  I'm not sure of what to do.
Some toys I see and hold off on because I feel they are to be used on me, not by me.
I'm not sure...

11/21/2017 8:17:37 AM
If you have preferences, great just avoid approaching me if your preference isn't anything near me, but all over your profile, it's a huge turn off. We girls have preferences too but you rarely see pics of us with those preferences. 

11/19/2017 2:09:02 PM
Mi haves bwand new glass toys. Now i just want a Daddy to help me with them (in real time not over phone or pc). Thestruggles lol

11/19/2017 1:25:25 PM
I'm really baffled in what world do you get to call a potential out of her name in anger and still expect her to deal with you? I'm not the one. That doesn't fly it simply does not. So let's move on.

11/18/2017 7:25:25 AM
Messages, pics, phone, meet. That's my preference. Starting online is fine as long as commitment and obedience aren't expected until meeting a few times.

11/18/2017 4:53:59 AM
My friend said i make trucking sound fun. I am actually starting to forget what it was like. Not the riding part but the doing it with a partner not with someone that is solely a driver or a friend. Some have offered to take me out but I've learned i have no desire to ride with someone if I'm not comfy. A rig is a confined area so I really have to be into the person. If the right person or people click with me, my toiletry bag is ready and I'm going to get braids because i remember taking a while in the shower at night. One friend wants me to go but I'd be out there way too long. I was excited about plans to hang with a master friend but i think he's gone missing again (not sure because i haven't called lol)... he's one of few that can vanish and i won't get pissed because he explained that's just how he is, but if i don't see midwest snow this year I'm revoking his reappearing card lol. Having friends i only get real time with occasionally is no fun.

11/18/2017 4:33:08 AM
It's early I want a daddy to make breakfast for and then he will watch me watch cartoons. Then he'll spank me because i really need to take my test Monday. Then we'll shower together and check out college football. I'll study, he'll fuck me, we'll have a great Saturday. I don't think that's too much to ask for. Lol Daaaaaddyyyyyyy...

11/16/2017 8:17:58 AM
People stress communication... For me its more than that... There's people i communicate well with but we don't comfortably talk. Communicating and talking comfortably aren't the same to me. If i gotta hold back I'm not into it. If we're on the phone for hours but fussing or disagreeing or antagonizing each other, there's no future in a relationship. For me to be into someone we gotta be able to talk. Talk and agree on many things but not all things. I get issues come up but we gotta be able to talk it out, not ignore it or go back and forth without agreeing. I communicate with a good amount, but it's gotta go deeper. If you are the type to back away so you won't get hurt I'll just stay away from the beginning because I've been hurt but I'm not hurting others because of it.

11/15/2017 7:09:11 PM
I don't like when men end conversations because things got emotional. Not arguing but just heart to hearts or tugging their sensitives.

11/15/2017 5:47:27 PM
How does an s type know if a Master or Daddy is actually jealous or just acting like it? In person i know if it's um... Expressed majorly but subtle hints i guess i still have a bit of naivety in that way. I know a few d types that won't be my friend online citing my "flirty behavior" Here's the thing, if I'm yours you can st...... leme rephrase you can let's say limit it. If I'm not the person's girl i don't get why they care about innocence flirting with strangers well not strangers cause i flirt with people I've met offline but that's not the point. See man... Real time is better cause then all they'd have to do is... nevermind lol #1 yall don't need ideas from lil ole me and #2 i think that's partly why some might "act" jealous because they know how i respond to it, but the jealousy causes some to back away and if they back away I back away. If it makes them rise to the occasion and shall i say "hold" my focus then it's cool. In the past the person had to be jealous for me to want to go deeper. Now that's not the case, but... idk

11/15/2017 10:48:25 AM
It's the holiday no need to be grouchy. Spend cheer and smiles and goodness.

11/13/2017 8:07:07 AM
The right one(s) for me will pursue me. They won't tell me how different they are from others (huge turn off). Their actions will show me. This year I've had interest expressed just to in the end have their actions show otherwise. If waiting until I'm comfy is too much, we just aren't a good fit. If you are transparent If your actions can stand and show your feelings If you aren't arrogant and won't call me a bitch just because you're upset If you have time to focus and build. If you have love to give and memories to make If you appreciate advice with actions... If you can commit to not holding feelings in If you impact with passion Correct with love And kiss with lust You might be a fit If i serve you Caress you Giggle with you Learn for you Gain strength through you Share love with you Spread my arms with joy My legs with shyness My ass cheeks with submission My lips with hunger And my perception with patience I might be your type I'm still open to those with sincere interest, but I'm leaning back.

11/6/2017 8:02:10 AM
Here's the thing people... There's certain things you say that you may not be able to fix. I have been possessed before and that means we did have arguments, issues, whatever, but certain things are off limits especially in the beginning. Things like: being called a b, backhanded compliments, being constantly over talked, all without owning me does NOT fly. If past partners didn't speak to me in that way you don't get a pass. There's nothing left to say besides best wishes. Some experiences happen to teach you something. I learned if you ask someone something hear them out. If you're tolerating things in the very beginning walk away.

11/2/2017 8:38:05 PM
My head hurts. I was productive today but my head hurts and i wish to just snuggle. I know it's a week night not a snuggle night, eh well.

11/2/2017 8:56:53 AM
It's almost afternoon. what's for lunch guys?

Tip: Obeying without meeting is something I'll only do if I feel like it. Doesn't sound sub or slave to you? Well if we haven't spent real time in person and agreed to be together I'm not yours so it won't sound how you want it to. Committing without meeting is NOT something I'm interested in. I feel it would be dumb on my part to set myself aside for someone I haven't been around in person or someone I can't be around frequently. I'm not saying I won't have a committed LDR where we see each frequently. I am open to friends that aren't near or able to meet because who knows but that's not what I'm on here for. Not being mean I just want to be clear.

10/24/2017 5:45:02 PM
My chair is squeaking and it's like soooo annoying...
Kinda excited for the month ahead
Yes I'm still around
Which of you loves seasonal flavors?
Which of you thinks fuzzy socks are cute?
Which of you can remind me to get some noise cancelling headphones tomorrow?
random humor: an ex's relative just told me to go to bed... smh my little side was like yes Sir but I just responded with ok.


10/15/2017 5:24:46 PM
Most overued first messages on CS... 

How's the search going? 
Had any luck on here? 
Hello slave (gets automatic delete)
Are you owned? 
and any 2 word compliment you can think of... 

10/15/2017 5:18:02 PM
Soft request... When you guys read this journal, please keep in mind I use words with their action definitions in mind, and if not I clarify, please take what I write as simply that. Lately I've had people write me getting far out ideas when often times the words I used have aren't the same as what they gather. 

Example: If i write some days I don't want to wake up... That does NOT mean I'm suicidal. It does NOT mean I don't feel worthy... It means... roflmao "some days I don't want to wake up". 

Example 2: If I say I don't prefer hairy balls... That doesn't mean I don't like them... It means "I don't prefer hairy balls" or "hairy balls are not a preference..." (I do happen to prefer shaved smooth balls and I will NOT enjoy sucking them if they aren't) 
I'll write that and get some crazy reply like "I guess you won't suck my balls because they aren't smooth" and I sit there looking at the screen like "knucklehead you just assumed yourself out of a possibly enjoyable experience for You" because I didn't say "I wouldn't suck hairy balls"
 
Example 3: If I say "I don't care for grey facial hair, especially on blk men" (which is actually true) I would come to messages with assumptions like "you don't like blk men" or "you wouldn't be with me because I'm grey, that's shallow" when in actuality I have been with a few blk men with grey hair on their faces... one salt and pepper and one totally grey and I loved them both (not at the same time)... Somehow people read that and glean from it "I don't care for blk men with grey hair" which is totally different.... 

I'm going to say something many of you Doms or Masters love telling subs or slaves... "Stop overthinking it... You're thinking too much into this" and it's counterproductive, not to mention enough to actually make me want to stop posting on here if I wasn't really a writing type of person. 

If you are curious about an entry just ask me... A good starter is "what did you mean by..." but it's likely I meant EXACTLY what I said, nothing more and nothing less.

10/13/2017 8:01:19 AM
I'm not able to quickly respond to messages on here so if you don't get a quick one nothing personal. The issue will be fixed... A question was asked by a handsome gent how the being possessed and my free spirit coexist. It was a good question. While unowned (which lately I've enjoyed) I suck up the attention from others, but while owned I bask in the attention I give to serve. Why do I seem sad some days? Because I like the bond in M/s there's nothing like it. Why do I seem like I don't care about having a Master other days? A few reasons one reason is attention... yummy attention.... I don't get down like that while owned. I focus... Another reason is: some Masters don't want you to enjoy life.... Some get hard from taking slaves through changes and cheating themselves because they don't feel worthy and maybe they aren't life too precious for all that time wasting. Do I want to be owned? When it's my time, yes Now a question or two for you... I'll ask later.

10/10/2017 9:01:33 PM
Follow your gut... If you're already thinking negative things from the beginning there IS a reason. If you're giving the person a reason, to: doubt, assume, or think negative be an ADULT especially if you have daughters or sons because karma is a bitch. We are all getting older and some never grow up, but you can. We can all be better than we were yesterday. I challenge us all to be authentic and transparent. It's hard sometimes but it's real.

10/9/2017 12:08:54 PM
When is the last time you've been sucked?

10/8/2017 12:56:11 PM
Shrugs it was a nice weekend

10/7/2017 6:48:22 PM
Enjoy the pics if that's your thing A few more coming just a heads up

10/6/2017 8:56:35 PM
Is my place at your feet? Is it my job to greet, you and your guests? To always do my best Knowing you desire nothing less Is it my place To nightly lay In your arms as you say "Slut, you're mine" I take my time Breathing... I get shy You get my drift I feel pressure Your palm squeezes your treasure I don't fight to breathe the texture Of your hand on my neck Has this body shaking I become wet Please let.......

10/5/2017 6:45:23 AM
Pounding me Drowning me In cum You come It runs I run Down my face it goes Down a path I go With who? You? Who knows My heart would beat So free You will beat so freely Ooooo Take me

10/2/2017 6:29:37 AM
I woke up this morning wishing I was possessed... or just didn't wake up. Life is different without someone. Some days I'm happy about being free other days not so much. I wouldn't take drama and confusion or constant complaints over being free but I would take building a life or sharing a life with someone(s) I can trust enough to belong to. Someone I love enough to kneel for mentally. Sexual talk does nothing for me and I really don't even get the point unless we feel an emotional connection. Very few people on this site that I've chatted with really get that. So I'm going to hope people that get it come my way.

9/30/2017 8:29:51 PM
My ass cheeks and triceps are in pain I already took a hot shower. No not from s&m. I want a daddy but I think the gentleness I seek will only be found places other than cs. The Master thing is more likely from this site.

9/29/2017 3:21:24 PM
I have to be able to accept you for you, and you have to be able to accept me for me excluding the stuff that behavior mods won't fix otherwise there's no future.

9/28/2017 11:15:49 PM
Random thought before I head to snore... I mention the thing about d types vanishing or not being willing to talk through things, and then I see s types mention "Not being free no matter what" makes them happy... Maybe these years that's what I've wanted. Not a hostage situation, but a "whether W/we're pissed or happy we will always and forever be an U/us dammit slut." in words and deeds, a girl can dream.

9/27/2017 3:23:22 PM
We all have things we just won't cope with... Oddly I haven't met anyone (besides one couple) that didn't get longevity by tolerating stuff that I currently refuse to cope with. On the other hand I'm sure I am willing to cope with stuff they just couldn't imagine lol so it goes both ways. 
Example, people caring for aging parents that were actually there for them as decent parents while they grew up is something I'd totally flow with. Yea I might lack attention because of it, but guess what? To me that's sensible, it's worth it. It's better than them tossing the responsibility aside or dishing them to a home without even trying first. Someone having a well behaved offspring or two is also fine I don't mind at all. Yea I'll lack attention, but not necessarily because if we're serious with each other he might be the one lacking attention lol. The last person I mingled with (I say mingle because I didn't agree to be his because eh demisexual reasons). Our dealings ended with him texting a month after our weeks of silence saying "my son misses you" and I thought to myself "heck I miss him too." He was caring and fun and so freaking smart! The offspring not the guy lol. So to those who think I seem like there's no wiggle room eh there is.

9/26/2017 8:56:30 PM
Why don't I list prior training or my kinks or things I like? I list some on profile under interests tab. As for prior training... each master trains for himself if I'm interested in him so why list it? Just because I was trained to do it doesn't make it's my kink. My feelings for the person I'm under is what makes it something I desire to do. Yea typical, all about the feelings right? Lol you have NO idea. Also I'd hate to list some of the things I enjoy and then end up a ghost because "she said she liked xyz" lol. One thing I was trained to do is not put myself in positions that could be avoided hints the discretion. If there's mutual interest after quality time you'll find out...

9/26/2017 6:57:30 PM
Pouts I no fewl good

9/25/2017 6:53:51 PM
I go to bed early everywhere else but when I'm at home... odd

9/24/2017 6:26:22 PM
Glad to see more knee taking...

9/23/2017 9:59:12 PM
I don't hate being unowned or quality time with d types but the thing is... the time is temporary because I'm not theirs. So it's still a desire to belong.

9/22/2017 9:38:26 PM
Passing on someone not too far away and kinda handsome all because of communication and kinks not matching up. Oh well I tried.

9/20/2017 8:06:29 AM
If you are into pet play or degradation but still care about your sub or slave try human grade dog food. Tylees is one brand.

9/19/2017 3:47:03 PM
this guy sends a message saying he'd like to have a conversation... i say ok and he gets an attitude... i don't get why he'd expect me to say more when he couldn't realize sending a message IS starting a conversation, but he won't ruin my day lol.

9/12/2017 5:50:21 PM
So new tip... If you send an antagonistic message just to "get my attention" it'll likely be ignored. smirk and one more tip Wanting me when you know nothing about me or haven't even seen a pic is creepy... I want to be wanted and needed, really i do but... I just... You guys understand right? I'm not saying it's gotta take months before we have interest, but at least some time... Right? Maybe not. My little friend says it's not creepy and I shouldn't be picky but if i was going to not be picky... well... um... shrugs...

9/10/2017 8:19:15 PM
Would you consider possessing someone that was an attention addict? Right now I'm reminded of something, if ya don't want to share my focus the attention i receive especially at night has to be good. That's one thing i don't mind about unowned life, if one doesn't oh another will...

9/10/2017 2:35:44 PM
sooooo arousedddd... is football and cock too much to beg for

9/8/2017 6:50:58 PM
went to get new glasses lmao i so wished for a D type to say "she'll take these"... it would have gone way faster but I got a pair and the others will wait. Now to pick my sneakers... hashtag unownedlife isn't always fun well at least my sneakers were picked for me but the ones that the D friend picked aren't available anywhere in the color, size, and price I want so... lol

9/6/2017 7:48:36 PM
In fall I get cuddily, a tad clingy, short leash hungry, and a bit generally submissive... And random cravings of physical s/m.... my apologies in advance. If you rather the free spirited let me do me side message me in May if I'm still on here by then lol

9/6/2017 9:19:49 AM
Don't let anyone ruin your day especially a total stranger's opinion.

8/22/2017 8:32:43 PM
Sir will you extend / a gentle warm hand / calmly convey your pleasures to be sure I comprehend? / Can you tell by my deep breaths for me service isn't a trend? / that this life is very special and I crave control from a gentle M? / Could you start fresh with me / Forgetting Marisol, Tameka, or Emily? / Let my mistakes be mine and yours will be yours (cause they will happen)/ I'm confident we'll be great as long as they're acknowledged and made up for / No adding them up and boiling over I'm sure you won't because you're mature / I won't mention them over and over because you'll show me i can be sure / your intentions are genuine and you'll see my heart is pure / I won't flirt with other men unless it's just my way of asking for / extra attention, a bit of yanked submission / blood rush to my head because you put me in suspension / next day I'm in your bed you hover over me i still feel tension / i beg and i plead "slut get on your knees" / is all you say to me / giggles I'll try hard to please / it's odd that i kinda think / when I'm owned is when I'll feel most free / suddenly you moan as i begin to blow you deep /

8/16/2017 11:30:24 PM
about to chill on the terrace while she takes her shower.

8/14/2017 4:01:47 PM
I should pack... Goes to do laundry text me or kik me if you like i feel so lethargic. only visiting guys

8/12/2017 6:11:10 PM
s types if you're seeking a Master check out AnnonaMouseDom he seems pretty upfront and no nonsense in my opinion.

7/29/2017 11:17:13 AM
Here's the thing... I've been on here a while. Actively looking not for a while. If we've chatted in the past like 2012 ~ 2014 pleeeeease dont think you know me because besides "mr 420" NO ONE from back then off of this site actually consistently spoke with me in real time or on the phone from then to this year. So you DON'T remember ME. you remember what we discussed back then. A LOT has changed. So either start fresh or pass me by. Many have been blocked or hidden because I have no desire to see the same faces in my viewing section if we don't talk. I'm actively open to pursuits, but only if I feel a positive connection and I don't have to meet you to catch a vibe. I do have to meet you to commit.

7/28/2017 8:57:22 PM
From: brokeraby Dated: 7/28/17 11:53 PM Mmmmm I want you! You need a big black Daddy/Dom like me who would lead you by your collar showing you off in front of my other big black cock friends while I make you wear a tiny short skirt that would ride up when you move exposing the fact that I don't let you wear panties while your with me. So I can slide my hand easily under your skirt to feel how your pussy trembles at my touch getting instantly wet in anticipation from what I will make you do next. "this dude is about 5 yrs too late. It's so lame when they think they're hitting me with some brand new stuff. The whole no panty or always naked stuff is typical dom request. Somebody make me hate lame."

7/28/2017 8:54:14 PM
unattractive guys are really acting crazy today. usually I dont talk about looks but again a guy in kik asks today and yesterday if I have pics. He didn't offer any yesterday so today I tell him he asked that yesterday. So he proceeds to send like 8 pics none in good lighting and ALL were EXTREMELY UNATTRACTIVE!!! Major weight issue, no smile, no fashion sense... Why am I picking on this guy when I dont pick on people? Because he CHOSE to come out of the gate talking about pics INSTEAD OF allowing us to get to know each other as people and him not being attractive wouldn't have mattered to me.

7/28/2017 10:19:15 AM
lmao i just saw an unattractive guy say "must have good looks" really??? I get you can't pick what you're attracted to but lol. I just passed on a trip to my city I feel most comfy in... Why? Idk I'm just not in that mode right now. Sorry atl

7/28/2017 7:34:16 AM
I've had a lot of marriage questions lately... I have no desire to get married. One Master had me close to it but he lived in the middle of nowhere and right before he got me to believe he was sincere he showed his stinger lol or immaturity. Plus we were cool for 3 yrs before we even met in real time which neither of us are big on talking that long without meeting. So I don't want marriage not on paper anyway. If you're over 55 and somehow I get interested in you and we last 20 yrs or if you get me to carry your kid those are the only ways I deem marriage necessary or if you're like the daddy of my dreams as high isn't likely otherwise I just want a bond that lasts forever fuck the ink

7/28/2017 7:13:16 AM
I'm kinda cuddly and emo today. ya know what i think is amazing? stability Where both people go through spats occasionally but no one even thinks of leaving. Maybe the relationship opens up but no one runs away. i dont mean going through stuff every week or something happening every month lol thats when in my opinion there's personality clashes or other outside forces to handle. I mean like every 4 or 6 month minor spats. if i have to live to be 41. I'd love to say "yes we've been together 5 or 10 yrs consistently.

7/25/2017 11:58:00 AM
"all messages go through my master" Rofl half of these chicks exerting their Doms cyber dominance are getting banged in REAL TIME which is where I live lol by some other guys who probably are vanilla or HWC / BBC. by the way for the ignorant ones you CAN'T be a BBC you can have one but if you say you are one: it's showing your stupidity, it's saying you're a dick, lol @ the guys with dick pics but they don't want to get attention because of their dick loool. 4 many of the guys in my opinion with dick pics don't even have attractive dicks. The person with the most beautiful dick I've seen thus far has never put a pic of it on here and that made me feel honored. To the girls that think they're sharing a profile with their D type, unless you are helping him search lol odds are he has another profile.

7/24/2017 8:42:06 PM
i haven't played with a man's facial hair or sat on a lap in almost 2 months, am I losing my flow? have I ever been choked during sex?? I don't really think so. I know I've been choked but that was in rage or passion or my attitude offering checks that my lungs couldn't cash lol but I don't think I've been choked (with hands) while literally having sex and that's kinda some lightweight stuff. Um D types some of you are looking kinda confused when you say you're not into something but it's on your interests as curious about or loves lol... a 21 yr old bought their slave the type of collar i once longed for, then they posted concerned if it would be ok for their slave to sleep in... that's so sweet and mature and considerate just slightly unnecessary because they are made for 247 wear. just more proof maturity or mastery isn't about age

7/23/2017 9:56:05 PM
for the chicks messing with married guys... if he ends up on life support its on the wife to choose so you losing the person you've given your life to is in someone else's hands. thats one of the many reasons why if the dude is married shes gotta be on the same accord otherwise I'm not down. a new associate made me remember it when he explained why getting an uncontested divorce was important to him. I get it... Plus he's younger than i am so its a good time to get out in other news... i want cuddles

7/23/2017 6:10:17 PM
is it bad that if someone actually falls in love with you you'll be over 30 but you've been in love twice? lol life is funny that way and people wonder why I'm big on reciprocity...

7/22/2017 10:08:03 PM
wow lol first time a person on a lifestyle site hinted at a face pic without a pic of ANY PART of him not even chest lol i thought only vanilla guys did that ha silly me

7/22/2017 7:25:25 PM
you guys are all the way live tonight with the craziness lol

7/22/2017 7:09:25 PM
deserving respect?? lol we are ONLINE STRANGERS neither of us deserves anything at all from the other at this point. Do you know the crappy messages we women are sent daily??? Some men have the NERVE to say what they deserve from people countries away... If someone's phone making a typo or the site having issues is all it takes for an "I deserve" rant, there's REALLY little left to say. I dont like typos either but seriously? I'd sound extremely entitled to tell a stranger what they should or shouldn't do

7/20/2017 8:50:57 PM
I only advertise long term because I can offer it. Completely single, I know it's not super common on here oddly, but I am and if that changes it'll be clear whether I'm poly or mono. Hoping the right fit(s) will respect that. Yes I know the profile comes up black to some that don't like thinking inside of the box roflmao!! What's happening this weekend? I'm interested in some cuddling and suckling and having fun in the sun. I've been asked a few times lately why my preference for older men vanished... Older guys are often just as immature and scared if not more than younger guys. I said OFTEN not always. That often is based on my experience not yours. The other reason is the same reason I try motivating my dom friends to go for younger s types, often times usually less baggage. With every older guy I end up wishing I had met them before the others got to them and had a chance to leave whatever bruises they put on their heart or taught them whatever craziness they did was acceptable. If I had met them first I wouldn't have had heartbreak and they'd be happy but people are who they are. Wishing i met someone earlier isn't positive. That doesn't mean I'm against older guys it's just not AT ALL a preference. Age is not a level of mentality, maturity is not measured in age.

7/18/2017 9:11:41 PM
well I think I found company for my layover coming up. Between two chocolate muscle bound guys and an older creamy daddy dom. I did not expect that at all but I'm glad because when I oddly asked my first love if he'd be in town and he said no I wasn't upset I just thought it would be nice to take extra time and chill comfortably instead of waiting around. So now I just might chill comfortably. We've still gotta exchange numbers and get acquainted more first. I'm just surprised to actually have options to hang with that I'm attracted to physically in that area and so quickly. 29, 32, and I think the creamy one is like 50 but eh it's ok. often the quick responders aren't my cup of juice

7/18/2017 8:42:22 PM
loooonelyyyy I'm so looooneelllyyy kiss me lol yes yea lonely by choice doesn't mean it's not annoying sometimes. I know trips coming up but not here yet. ooo football season almost aye meanie are you doing fantasy with me again we need 1st place this time we were robbed last time! if not oh well you're mean anyway lol that's a shame meanie could mean one of like um well almost any D type I've met in person in the past 2 yrs lol so I'll be specific bastard meanie lol

7/17/2017 8:33:28 AM
need to get dressed but nothing to wear 10:45pm est I ended up in a tank and khaki skirt. It was an alright day had to handle some electric stuff but it was accomplished I felt all adulting and what not. lol So I'm back in my no suitors mood. Who knows. I'm thinking of going swimming this weekend. one girl had her man recording her at swim class. I was like awww. I see the guys picking their girls up from places or holding their ice cream or encouraging them at the track and I stay confident I'll have that type of motivator one day. Not someone after sex or a break from a life they aren't happy with but someone who wants to build with me and beat on me in the naughty way is how I mean beat lol. Someone willing to communicate through confusing times not a runaway. I am starting to have visions like I haven't had in years but this time I don't see the man's face because may be I haven't met him yet. Seeing myself belonging to someone forever. Trusting someone with my heart. I think I'm finally back to being ready to go all in with someone(s). It will not be automatic, but for a while I didn't think I'd ever picture myself doing that anymore because I know how it can end up. I've learned from the experience and that's a great thing. Sweet dreams people. I'll be up a bit but if you're heading to bed gnight.

7/16/2017 5:39:45 PM
Early Bird tickets are NOW AVAILABLE for those ddlg people heading to CapCON in 2018. I don't really get into the ageplay because for me it's just a part of my personality, but there will be a lot pertaining to middles and littles and daddies and baby girls. If you're planning to go, let me know so we can chill out. It'll be in Chicago. So if you live there and just wanna stop by the room that can be arranged if I don't have a Daddy at that point and if I do.... I've been running into guys that aren't jealous so ya never know lol.

7/15/2017 5:26:09 PM
I'm not the hottest thing but when I love I love genuinely, deeply, and completely. when I serve it's my all if I'm yours. That's a check my heart, mind, and ass can cash. It always has. How I am has changed but I'm still me. in other news I just saw a profile on here and if he'd shave the beard he'd look 15yrs younger.

7/15/2017 4:59:24 AM
Almost a month from the date I visit AZ. Flight: check Hotel: check but I might change it from a resort to a regular hotel lol. Plans: check Sooo... now I just want to find someone to relax with during my layover in Houston on the way back. My first love did cross my mind but I think that would be too uncomfy. As for finding a date in Arizona I think I'll be out and about so much with my lady friend I won't have much time besides the night I fly in. I wanna hit the beach before this lol if you'll be in AZ mid August let's talk may be set up something that night. Dinner or a bar. 25 ~ 40 for that night (unless I already know you) because I just wanna enjoy myself.

7/7/2017 5:59:37 PM
yes the profile is intentional lol thank you fellas if y'all insist I'll be normal but what fun is that

7/6/2017 7:32:11 PM
So nervous right now but I promised myself if nothing happened by the promised time I'd do it. I just didn't know it would be so soon. I'm just uneasy instead of excited. I always pictured me doing this with someone not on my own but oh well.

7/4/2017 4:57:33 PM
Nothing is so strong as gentleness; and nothing is so gentle as real strength" - Penelope Garcia

7/3/2017 6:03:15 PM
the question was asked what's the perfect daddy dom for me here ya go humble and mature single or no craziness Loyal (when stuff happens he will have my best interest at heart always) Good with finances even if he's broke. GENTLE & CUDDLE LOVER & PDA ENTHUSIAST A little jealous but a lot possessive Transparent active listener CALM passionate in bed trusting and deserving of trust i gotta make sure people are doing the right thing for the right reason when it comes to my heart and my naughtiness. So I just realized yes I'm unowned by choice.

7/3/2017 1:02:13 PM
A few have noticed I'm not very giving of info about my life right now. privacy is nice. If you're involved in my life you'll know what's up. if not, it's not personal I just don't see a point.

7/2/2017 9:13:26 PM
Well June is over Seemed like it took a bit to end Alrighty how is ya fellas? 4:00pm productive days make me feel soooo good!!! Now just lacking that Daddy to make it all come together.

7/2/2017 11:59:07 AM
this guy thought I was a prude just because I'm quiet and personal about sexual things, until today when he mentioned thinking water sports was crazy. I said I don't see that as crazy and he responded asking if I've done it. I answered and explained how bonding it can be lol. I'm not sure what he's thinking now, but I'm sure the prude thought is gone hehe.

7/1/2017 8:27:45 PM
so I'm just settling in hehe guess what? I'm eager because my associate the one thats cocky but I loved his tongue a few years ago, I think he's going to approach the girl I was trying to link him up with. She has a sweet personality from our chats and such beautiful powdery white skin. She's totally his type. I think it took a few years but he finally gets that my trying to match him up is me caring, not the opposite. I'm just a hopeless romantic. simple as that.

6/29/2017 8:12:24 PM
I want someone to hold my hand and walk wiff me at night. why is that so hard? someone to sit at the table while I make him breakfast wait I'm lying that part is easy but I want to love the same dude I'm making breakfast for that's the hard part. I want a bedtime story or sex after my shower. just pull my panties to the side and let me whimper I want to lay on... nevermind

6/29/2017 6:01:59 PM
imitation is one of the greatest compliments. Remind yourself of that whenever someone copies your actions.

6/28/2017 4:18:30 PM
guy with muscles in Tucson I think your message was lost in my mail so if you see this can you shoot me another so we can text or something before i arrive. thanks in other news originality is priceless. It's sexy when a D leads with his own unique ideas, approach, words, and habits. I love it! hehe So I will either find something fun or back to my Atlanta plans for the 4th. the guy kind of had my attention to get me to change my plans but I can be fickle. One or two signs I walk away because I was totally honest with him so no guilt here. he texted this morning still trying smh he should have been mature.

6/28/2017 12:14:47 AM
*giggles* ni night cuddles all the loving people

6/27/2017 10:18:14 AM
so today I done being happy and free for today I want cuddles and a daddy to rub my head and my tummy cause it hurts and him to pick my nail colors and take me to get lunch and then we go to the park and relax. Watch movies and cuddle or baseball. I want him to take my phone so I no have to talk or stress myself. and then I suck his penis licking the top and kissing the balls til I fall asleep it's been forever since I've fallen to sleep with my head between a man's legs the mentors say I'm ready and I guess they're right I want a daddy at least for today with facial hair but no beards lol

6/24/2017 10:04:10 PM
craving a nice tanned extension of manhood to suckle... my love doesn't fade I just learn to channel it in healthier ways for me.

6/21/2017 10:19:37 PM
😃 the perfect DD/bg song and video, all she was really asking for was longevity and maybe that's the type to give it. https://youtu.be/h9rCobRl-ng

6/20/2017 5:59:27 PM
just because you're submissive doesn't mean you should accept anything lol I tell girls and they don't get it so hear it from a man!! https://youtu.be/yRfE4oh3zQ8 follow your gut don't ignore signs don't waste your or his time

6/17/2017 7:01:40 PM
sweet kisses I never thought I'd crave kissing. It has never been my favorite thing, but I have the desire for some serious making out followed by candle light massage and sex in the tub...

6/17/2017 6:28:52 PM
congrats to the new fathers out there lol

6/16/2017 6:12:26 AM
Strangers telling me what they want to do to me is creepy. Just felt it was necessary to share because some messages seem to think I'm going to reply or feel turned on, nope. Now if you at least made it romantic I might become intrigued not likely but possible.

6/15/2017 6:39:48 PM
Next event I hit I'm hopeful a D type will be my company. Going alone is fun for different reasons but it's not the same. Not really time to think of that right now. I have to figure out this trip thing. If I'm going to do it alone and fly when I know my mind is going to be all over the place or if I'm going to ride with someone I don't know well. Granted it will feel better not to be alone but I'll be nervous and maybe fearful... This is one of the few times I want a daddy for a selfish reason. Someone to hold me and tell me I can do this. To hold my hand as I go there and if the results are agonizing they'll hold me as I cry. if the results aren't bad as I think we can celebrate... Many are accustomed to the safe arms of a mate regardless of they're happy with them or not. I'm accustomed to the daddies I show that side to, vanishing. Gotta do what ya gotta do. If you're my friend, before you message me I know and appreciate you guys looking out for me. Meanwhile ya know although I'm grateful it's not the same. I'm not ready for this. No, I'm not sick at least not to my knowledge

6/10/2017 2:35:15 PM
where can I find a nice penis attached to a gentle man to remind me how to be throat fucked? yes he's gotta be gentle Idk why I just don't lol

6/9/2017 10:19:53 PM
lol found a site with cheap and slutty workout stuff... going to get a few. this guy on a motorcycle used being locked up in the city I live in as a pick up line. I heard a past master in my head saying "if you give him your number from that I'm kicking your slutty little ass" then I just said "oh I'm alright nice bike"

6/9/2017 8:40:57 PM
sometimes I wish I wasn't such a hopeless romantic. In the end I am who I am... I have clarity tonight regarding a few things. There's nothing wrong with that. Arms to belong in and owner(s) to serve one day...

6/9/2017 7:48:07 AM
atl plans arranged hoping all goes well.

6/7/2017 8:44:05 PM
uff there's people that state assumptions instead of inquiring... kinda sucks because dude was attractive too. Maybe if he was vanilla it could slide but if you're interested in ruling my world you need the balls to ask what you wanna know. if it's assumed I'll ignore it or play as dumb as those assuming to get answers think I am. I probably would have gotten irritated if my friend hadn't made me smile but I just shrugged it.

6/7/2017 6:34:02 PM
my phone has only 18% let me charge it up don't wanna inspire any issues might be up late tonight running my mouth feel free to text if you have a way. my middle side is craving to come out but I'mtrying to keep her inside I might stop posting or even remove panty pics. the attention is nice but the begging to remove the panties can get a tad annoying... I know I know I'm unowned but I didn't really have pussy pics on kink sites before I was owned and while I was owned I was taught to leave it to imagination so... I really no wanna show my cookie. I just no wanna.... I want the person(s) I belong to be the one(s) who see it. the pressure kinda creeps out my babygirl side

6/7/2017 6:26:16 PM
I'm sorry but sometimes when vanilla guys say something about pain, I try letting it slide but if it comes up again I have to say um I've had this and that done so yea.... Not in a braggy way but in a "chill out and relax type of way". then when I share an experience or two suddenly I'm being called crazy for letting whatever be done to me... But they weren't crazy when they were talking about lighter things... hmmmm it's funny because when they go on and on about being freaky I just let them talk lol. I guess I'm more open to their pain than their sexual advances lol.

6/7/2017 8:53:53 AM
if you had an average looking or below s type with you literally 247 for 1 - 2 weeks... Could you do it without having sex with her?

6/6/2017 10:44:07 PM
cuddles and spanks and suckles

6/5/2017 6:38:25 PM
how long do you take before you consider someone a potential? if someone you like was attending a lifestyle event would you rather know or not? training myself to finally keep my phone charged and close by, even if it means carrying extra batteries and power sticks lol...

6/4/2017 8:34:13 PM
FUCK! Selfish guys turn me on!!! just the things they say. my cookie creams but have to keep my mind right

6/1/2017 4:04:48 PM
if I beg for mercy would you b3 sure not to hurt me b3 sure to leash me up not drag in a hurry be sure to snatch me up if I became too flirty y'all know how I do, rigs or convertibles but what y'all miss is that I'm actually quite true a few hav3 told the lie but I know I'm not cute beyond the little eyes is a heart that'll see you through beyond petite thighs is something especially for you beyond the innocence is a slut to please you beyond the shoulders tense are fingers to soothe If you're set for me, I'm ready for you you ask why I'm solo? no one compatible has crossed my path

5/29/2017 11:40:04 PM
I tired but not sleep yet

5/28/2017 3:45:18 PM
One friend (female) says don't try giving me until I have me Another (male) says men work better with offers and agreements I have me... I want to offer me... Now.... Is it ok to pursue even though my life isn't how I want it?? Some may say what better time? Others may say no... I gotta think about it more but I feel ready

5/27/2017 7:07:06 PM
Yea there's a black box full of stuff for me in your closet but it's not important to make effort... So put the stuff on or in the people worth the effort. Goes to find my own fox tail butt plug. Guys wonder why I say buying stuff for a girl often times doesn't mean you care at all.

5/26/2017 8:17:04 PM
If you don't get something I post it's ok. Bearded guy said I should write for me, so I'm not going to work to clarify, justify, sanctify, pacify, and hopefully no one will write to me intending to crucify. In other news I wanna get out of town and one of my trucker friends is heading to NC but I not going wiff him. He's a meanie a funny meanie but a meanie he said girls can't sleep on the same bunk unless they gonna have xex wiff him (yea yea my liddle side spells sex wrong) lol. I think that's mean. Since I'm Demisexual I think I should get special rules like... I can sleep on the bunk for comfort but I have to give a bj if I want to stay on there the whole night... I mean work wiff me... But noooo he won't negotiate. So I not going... Well I could sleep on the top bunk the whole time... But I think I might fall. I de clare If I get a Daddy Master person wiff a truck he never gonna make me sleep on top. On the other hand he'd always get sex so I guess my point is moot On the other hand if he always gets sex that might be all it is to him, which would sadden but wouldn't surprise me. Eh well I know there's good actors in life, but usually my gut let's me know if it's about feelings or not... It's only been wrong, once I guess, and on that one I'm ok because I know my intentions were genuine and positive *smiles*. Night people I think I gonna go ziplining next week alone lol But I wanna go see sesame Street live lmao that's not happening

5/26/2017 7:41:50 AM
I no want anyone knowing how I sleep, that's personal. If you're in bed with me you'll find out how I sleep or how I sleep when I'm comfortable. Yes they are very different.

5/24/2017 5:36:07 PM
If you're a non creepy guy attending the hotel event in greensboro nc, let me know if you'd like a bad lol or bed even, for the second night of the event. I booked a 2 bed, room so you'd have space if you desired. Basically tickets have sold out and as the date gets closer the babygirl side of me doesn't want to be in a strange room alone at night. Plus I don't want any odd boogie man to follow me. My other idea is to invite a friend even if they don't attend the event but my new trucker friend said that makes no sense unless I gonna screw the person... I have mean friends right? See I need a Daddy cause he's a bad influence lol

5/24/2017 10:06:39 AM
I feel like a new person after shaving my cookie lol

It's gloomy and rainy I want a daddy Master lover person thingy to cuddle So have any of you heard of nofap? Well probably not since some of us are kinky, but it's like the worst thing since orgasm denial. My recent trucker friend told me about it, so I said I'd do it and the first 2 weeks (he says it was one) it was easy... The last 3 days have been gloomy, but idk why I've been doing it, but is it fap for guys and tap for girls? Ok so this no tapping thing sucks. I have NEVER MASTURBATED 3 DAYS IN A ROW! E v e r!!! The point of it is to NOT masturbate. Well evil communication corrupts! So grrrrr

5/23/2017 8:21:48 PM
To those married to vanillas or estranged people let them know... It's kinda hard to feel bad about moving on if for years they've tried to keep you sitting still or haven't tried keeping you at all. Wanting you when someone else shows interest, does that even count? That's why I don't have an issue with married lifestylers if the partner knows. Only one life I'm logging off folks. Text or call if you have my #

5/23/2017 6:40:33 AM
Morning people, so last night talked through some particulars for the AZ trip, that went well. Someone asked if I'm having success on here... It's a mixed bag as usual. A guy last week seemed he'd be a fit, but he quickly showed he was NOT. The messages are going back to when I started out in all of this with the oldest lines or questions in the book "what got you started in this?" "do you want total or just sexual?" "i think you have tendencies" rofl. The lines that prove you really aren't original... I guess it's an accurate hypothesis would be men really don't know what other men say. Which is even more amusing because so many men usually the Jerky ones are busy trying to tell me how men think as if they are the spokesperson for all men. When a guy here seems genuine, I respond whether I'm interested or not, usually. Basically as for potentials I don't consider someone a potential until there's mutual interest in a dynamic / relationship. I'm not going to share if there are or aren't any... But let's just say with it being summer I'm a lot more open and flexible. In other news everyone wants to go to carowinds but there's no plan... I rather we all get together and plan it, get passes or whatever instead of Playing by ear and feeling shocked by the price.

5/22/2017 9:26:58 AM
I'm careful about my friends, so if I become yours, they aren't going away just because you want them gone. Friends usually work things out with me and motivate me. If they don't, tell me how, but expecting me to push people away that have been around CONSISTENTLY longer than any relationship has, nope. Now if you stick around 5 to 10 yrs consistently without vanishing then sure pick my friends.

5/22/2017 6:08:07 AM
So I read a profile. The guy was super attractive by most standards. He kept saying how "real" he was and how serious he was. Didn't share anything about him besides living in a 4 bedroom home and being very devious sexually... I'm not sure if he realized echoing how real he is makes him seem less real lol. I'm not sure if he knows explaining only his sexual desires kinda offsets him saying he wants a live in sub unless he wants only a sexual sub... That's totally possible. Why am I writing about it? It was the first profile I saw today and I wanted to help anyone who has a profile that reads like his.

5/20/2017 4:07:15 PM
Shrugs free buffet because the girl didn't believe my age... Whatever man, I was taller than her. In other news, the plan for AZ is August. I may change my location to that area a few days before to see if any locals want to link up after my plans. I was kinda keeping things clear for June besides events, because I was told a few months ago something might happen, but I guess not. As long as I know I kept my word, I'm good. So since I'm not focused on keeping it clear, if you're local or coming through let's talk (no business men).

5/18/2017 10:56:17 PM
Aye Bearded guy... Thanks for the encouragement I really appreciate it

5/17/2017 4:34:00 PM
So recently near my area some racist stuff has been going on and since some know I'm not against dating outside of my race they're like basically telling me to chill... I get it It is kinda scary But at the same time I let that fear lead me for a while and what did I get from it? If I spend my life being afraid it won't be very eventful. So for now I'm just trusting my gut and my heart. If it leads me to someone dark as night or white as snow or olive as Yoda. It doesn't matter that much. We all have preferences but I've had preferences before and ignored preferences before and the results we similar. So gut and heart. I feel good about that Delivers Attention & Discipline Delving into his girl's Youthfulness All I do is shake Not thinking about a thing All over my body shivers Loud screams my legs quiver I like it So warm Full of passion Undying love Never ends

5/17/2017 7:33:18 AM
Hey sexy people Every day you're alive you have the opportunity to love, smile, and make someone feel great even if that someone is you. Don't let a day go by without giving it your best effort. You deserve it! If you don't deserve it why not focus on being a better version of you. Situating the toy bag because I see this really sweet flogger... Now just not sure if I'm getting it for myself or my lady friend in AZ. Speaking of AZ, she's left it up to me to pick which month I'll arrive, I no likey decisions like that but with both of us being planners I'd love to organize in advance, so can someone give suggestions on the best time to go and why? Not the 4th of July I already decided I'm not doing that.

5/14/2017 1:47:42 PM
So the former potential that called a few times hasn't called but we've been messaging. Even though he's cocky and told me to get out of his life once a while back (d types have said some pretty harsh things but often out of anger or frustration so I don't take it to heart) not sure if that's bad or good. Anywho he's still been checking on me and I try checking on him and I think that's a good thing... It's not the safe feeling that I crave but it's nice for now. I know he's probably surprised I finally quit sending him potential chicks lol. I kept seeing girls compatible with him. I don't do that with people much anymore besides my trucker friend I do it with him sometimes but it's fun. Note: please refrain from referring to yourself as my daddy. It really creeps out my babygirl side and makes me wanna hide physically. That side of me has been inside hiding lately anyway, but messages like that make me uncomfortable. I know I can just block but then I have to calm myself and I no wanna be mean. I know it's kinda stupid I know many don't get it. I wan suckle and go ni ni. I've had a few surprisingly offer their wiggles for it but I not I just can't even picture that in my mind right now. Sucking dick? Ya sure maybe probably but suckling... To me that's... Just too... Bonding to share with someone I don't feel the DD/bg bond with.

5/13/2017 10:34:12 PM
It's been a while since I've felt passion Been a while since I've cried As my owner enters me with my palms at my sides Been a while but I'm ready Teach me what I don't remember Rush in like summer's breeze warm me like fireplaces in November I hope you'll handle me ease but still show a rough texture I'll honor your transparency Fuck you anytime I see A window of opportunity Not because of the sex that's never been me But because you'll be the best to squeeze my leash Yea I forgot a lot in my years unowned And yes I've gotten feisty running a muck alone But I still know how good it feels to have someone hold A comfy short leash as if to say "babygirl, welcome home" The s&m won't be play it'll be me being sure that your sadist is toned The gentleness won't be a phase it'll be clear when you kiss me Even if we have rough weeks or days I'll still know that you miss me Cause we won't play any games As you stroke my mane I'll see clarity in your eyes and be sure you are the way That I see you in my mind You won't change on me Good ones are hard to find but you'll hang on to me If I start to cross lines you might go looney But our tunes will still bind as the music is booming Feel my body rewind as you fast forward doing me Parks and pools for fun Rubs and bubbles to clean You say I'm your love I say you're my King You'll know I'm your slut Others won't know anything A bond based on trust, plus communication, topped with integrity When you hold me I'll know it's where I'm supposed to be You're not under another's control you're busy controlling me Service you With all that's due Remain true See you through It all and if we fall Neither will turn and walk away We'll be each other's supports lifting each other and standing as we say "we got stronger" Whenever you appear I'll be ready I'm hoping it's this year, if not I'm sweating With excitement and preparation You'll know that I'll be delighted to help build a life not just make your acquaintance And even if you happen to have a wife she'll know her position and my ranking If you're single that's even better, maybe help populate this nation My time in this hasn't always been nice but when you arrive it'll call for celebration If I ever mess up keep me, only free me if you can look me in my eyes and say my collar isn't where your padlock should be hanging

5/11/2017 5:37:17 PM
As long as I've been on here, I've heard the comment of my profile being too long but more so nice comments noticing my genuine desire... 

I'll put it plainly and let that be that....

I want someone to feel safe with, who likes things I like and sorry to disappoint it's not this new age definition of being a "geek". Someone to read to me sometimes, hold my hand, receive blow jobs and massages from me, into the night, accompany me to lifestyle events, and allow me to undress and bathe him or her afterwards. Someone without secrets involving others and someone who is maybe even TOO transparent, so transparent that it might hurt but someone who will always be there to wipe my tears if I'm hurting. A companion to travel with, try new naughtiness with, and make love under the stars. Someone to motivate me and instead of saying "I thought you'd do this instead" he'll say "i can see you gave it your best". Maybe those sound like demands or being picky, but in exchange for that, my unwavering trust, commitment, dedication, and service is desired, craved, and inspired, and for that I will be grateful. The person(s) I described are out there. If you read this and it sounds like you... Let's see, and thank you for reading;

5/9/2017 9:47:46 AM
Ready to hop back out again, already lol. Btw if any s types are looking for a new tall chocolate D type in his 40's but looks younger to explore with, let me know and I'll message you his screen name. He's funny, transparent (maybe too transparent sometimes lol) and doesn't mind attending events. Also he's into sharing. Why don't I take him? Eh just because he's great doesn't make us each others type he's still a cocky a hole but most of my D type friends are lol.

5/8/2017 3:23:24 PM
I read from a slave that I read from before I even accepted the title. It was an old writing of hers about being chained because she was sleep walking. I remember vaguely sleeping chained. Kinda uncomfortable but also kinda comforting. Felt safe... I ate like crazy today because I'm back working out on my mod. 2 eggs 2 pieces of toast a banana a handful of grapes and a tlt sandwich. I workout more and my body craves more calories. So it stands to reason. As for lifestyle who knows

5/6/2017 8:19:46 PM
If I'm into you and I tell you I'm going to do something, if it's possible I'll do my best to do it or I'll tell you I changed my mind. I'm not the type to tell you I'm going to do one thing and get all major about doing it and then boom, and on top of that have an attitude or forget that I said I'd do it. I know how I felt when it was done to me, so I would do my best not to do it to someone else. It's odd.... Sometimes I look at my lifestyle relationships as what not to do to someone else and occasionally I'm like oh well they did this to me so let me do it to someone, then I remember, I'm not one of those who came into this to hurt or use people without their conent. I came because it's where I fit. I came because I love it. I came because I wanted the freedom to fully embrace myself and serving and being controlled is a part of that.

5/6/2017 8:03:03 PM
Smiles Who is going to keep me busy this summer? Cuddles Oral Spankings Massage Cooking Laundry Mmm

5/5/2017 6:41:32 PM
I saw a pic with a dog bowl and chain and collar... 

Why did my babygirl side picture fruit loops on one side of the bowl and almond milk on the other side.... I know I'm always saying it's still me not another person just an extension of my personality, but I don't think I've really had a slave thought in a babygirl mindset before just now.... Um... Idk how I feel about this... 

I haven't been feeling hello kitty for a long time and I gradually started throwing away my hello kitty socks that I've had forever, but now I'm thinking of getting a hello kitty dog bowl lol.

5/5/2017 2:30:46 PM
This song came on and I totally empathize Https://youtu.be/NJlOmDWyoA8

5/4/2017 8:12:01 PM
"babygirl it's alright, I promise. I'm not leaving you in the world alone" When I hear those words yall know I'm taken if they're true and backed by action. I'm logging off and in bed. If you're up and know the number feel free to hit me or text til one of us drifts off. I'm up late right now. Sweet dreams sexy

5/2/2017 11:18:54 PM
Careers don't impress or gross me. I've had the best oral response ever from a computer guru. My heart stolen by a minister. Sleepy sex from a decorated retired pilot. The best oral I've ever received from a mensa member. Heart ripped out repeatedly by a trucker. Time wasting from someone employed to protect and serve. Thighs caressed by exes in homeland security (don't judge me). Best date ever from a 25 yr old I.T. guy. So... Yea... Telling me you're a CEO won't make me start cumming. Telling me you're a garbage man won't send me running. It's about who you are, how you treat me, and your amount of baggage, not your career field, unless you're in the crime career track, That's only cool in the Sims. But I have been fantasizing about sex with a real gangster, not a relationship just sex lol.

5/2/2017 8:19:10 PM
I just saw a post where a Master explained how he handles releases or in my opinion how he prevents them.... I think I'll adopt the route because I think it really represents a focus on longevity, consistency, and respect not the usual treating people as if they are disposable or trash or luggage... It's been a while since I've felt like I really gained something from the forum chats (I don't use the forums here but other sites) so today I gained a few beneficial tidbits.
Yaaay bounces around

In other news, a former potential called a few times, but I didn't realize it was him until the number was gone... I could say something about it and maybe we'd start talking again but I'm too shy and nowadays I'm in the "remember why it didn't work" mindset and if I ask myself "have the factors that made it unsuccessful changed" and the answer is "no", there's no reason to backstep. It's easy to waste time with things or people based on what "may or could" change, but when I look at what is, today, right now, or how the person is today right now, I find I end up saving a lot of time and possible negative pain. On the other hand one could say "you haven't spoken audibly to him in a while so how do you know those things haven't changed" Eh... I can tell... Just the fact of us going that long without talking (for no reason) and then calling, it lets me know there's likely no intent of stability. Knowing is half the battle lol

5/2/2017 7:20:50 PM
People say guys don't read 
They say guys on here only think with their dicks
They say you don't care about our feelings
Shrugs maybe some days that's true
But today all I know is I wasn't feeling well
And the messages of care and concern...
Made not having D type to look after me a bit easier
From the bottom of my clit
I thank you 
A lot

5/2/2017 7:46:09 AM
Soooo I'm not feeling well I want someone to look after me. Grrrrrr

5/1/2017 4:58:43 PM
If we don't have effective communication things won't have longevity. If something is not sitting right with someone I'm involved with and they verbally express it we can work together to solve the issue or at least have clarity and end things if no solution is reached. If someone I'm involved with is just short or distant with me I'll take it as a sign they aren't in the mood to deal with me and I may ask once what's wrong, but we're adults (yes I have a little side but I'm still an adult) so using our words is what I need from a partner to be sure I'm giving what they need. Otherwise I'll take the distance to mean the person is no longer interested. I'm not going to beg to find out what's wrong. Nor am I accepting of letting things boil over. If you aren't the expressive / conflict resolution type or talk it out type, I'm not the lady for you.

5/1/2017 1:00:59 PM
When I get a Daddy he's gonna pick me up and bounce me on his penis while he's standing up That's really what I crave Right Now As petite as I am can you believe it's never been done??? Nope never Adds to the mental list lol

4/30/2017 11:47:26 AM
Roflmao literally @ a song called chicken strut

4/29/2017 8:36:20 PM
I rarely discuss past relationships but even if a D type talks about theirs, s types TRY NOT to. Like its fine talking about what you've learned from it or what you wouldn't do again but leave off the naughtiness or the type of control you were under because it's not necessary. In some cases the person will want you as you were when you were taken not realizing you might not be that way toward them. It's kinda giving false hope or comparing. So if I do compare which I feel is perfectly natural, I'm not making the person want what I gave to someone else. That's not fair.

4/29/2017 5:26:02 PM
My entries are random A few have said they were confused by them Let's clear it I am still Unowned since about eh technically over 2 years, this is written on 4/29/17 and I don't have a zillion potentials running around, Also I'm NOT married, thank goodness!!! Some entries are advice Some are poetry Some are about others Some are happy others are ranty

4/29/2017 12:45:44 PM
Eeeee my make up came!!!! Dances around

4/28/2017 8:31:34 PM
Thinking about getting back on this body mod. I altered it and rounded it off because someone I liked wasn't thrilled with it, but eh whatever. In addition going to dye the hair hehe. Should I get it professionally dyed or should I just do it? I'm thinking I should treat myself. Then if all goes well fly across the US in summer so if you live in AZ let's start chatting now so by the time I'm in the area I'll feel like I know you. I'll be visiting a lady friend there.

4/28/2017 9:09:38 AM
Daddddyyyyy It's Friday I wanna go to myrtle Beach! Or carowinds pleeease I'll be like better than good In other news my trucker friend is a meanie he was supposed to take me to the fair the other weekend and decided not to only because I said I can't be his girl cause he's mean. Even though he knows he's mean!! If he were sweet I'd actually consider it but nooo. If I were him I would have taken me anyway and tried showing I had a nice side. I guess I'll call and bug him because if I don't he might ask why I didn't lol. But still would u flake on me just because I think you're too mean to be your girl? Be honest guys I'm curious

4/27/2017 4:58:39 AM
When I was taken Manny moons ago I thought flipping him off was cute. He'd take my finger and bend it crap hurt Last night a window kinda slammed on my middle finger... I didn't cry until I had to put ice Hurts like heck I'm glad it's still attached and everything I'm glad I did most of my essay yesterday before it happened. Lol I swear I just wanted someone to comfort me and hold me and say it would be ok.

4/26/2017 8:03:15 PM
there's a girl who thinks her person is trying to get back with his ex wife... 
He told her to get her stuff and go because he got busted trying to play games...
My thinking is he probably isn't even divorced lol she was just something to fill the "separation" space lol they usually go back the sooner she knows the better. I read the post and felt sorry for her because of her age, too young to be jaded but with boys like that running around I guess it doesn't matter. 
Hopefully she'll take it as a learning experience and come back ready for love but no rose colored glasses. to thy own self be true guys. I don't get it but eh well. 

4/26/2017 7:16:38 PM
Dear Diary, 

     Nah I'm just fuckin with ya lol. So being a demisexual doesn't mean I don't like sex. It means if there's an emotional bond, I can be a nympho. Like I'll think about sex at least 30 times a day if I'm emotionally connected to someone. Maybe he won't know it, especially if I can tell it annoys or turns him off, but I still think about it. Sex can be amazingly passionate and connecting or bonding. It doesn't make or break me, but when I feel sparks and chemistry it's like yaaaay. I'm way more open to feeling all those amazing feelings than I've been in a long time. Smile for me gents. If someone getting wet and having a racing heart just from your call or your presence intrigues you, that's great. If you've had it before with someone and loved it, share your experience. 

4/26/2017 10:56:05 AM
What's up with me? I'm alright Why haven't I shared much here? Because it's really no one's business I saw a meme It said find bae and shut up lol How's the search? If I saw it as a search I wouldn't do it It's baffling people call it a search anyway It's the most annoying line any gut can use Right behind "oh you've been single a while so am I" It's like saying well we both haven't found anything let's settle lol. If we have never met and don't really have plans to I'm sorry but I most likely will stop replying unless we've both agreed to be phone friends or cyber friends and I'm much better with phone friends than cyber friends but both get old. One friendship is seeming that way and I'm about to close the door I think. He's a cool dude but that's not enough for me to talk to someone with any regularity when they could meet but won't. Why meet if I don't want a relationship with the people, because meeting makes it real to me. Meeting makes it worth it. Time is precious and if I'm putting in time I am not into doing it with a stranger. You can still be strangers after meeting but that's a personal choice

4/25/2017 5:07:06 PM
I can tell when someone loses a sub or two if initially he had 5 and suddenly he's constantly on here lol shrugs that's why being honest about being Poly helps cause if you lie lol its cheating

4/24/2017 7:32:33 PM
I did my nails pink and purple Now wheres my daddy to cuddle me while it rains?

4/23/2017 11:07:53 PM
If you don't see yourself as Poly but you touch your phone after sex for anything besides work or family, there's a serious problem in my opinion. Stuff like that is why I'm opening up my mind more to sex before agreeing to a relationship or dynamic. I can notice stuff like that and keep it moving.

4/23/2017 10:46:08 PM
Why am I still awake binge watching party of five?

4/23/2017 12:07:13 AM
The right Master(s) for me wants to read about how shy I can get. How feisty I am when pushed or disrespected. How much I miss cumming on command and having someone to be there for. How curious I am about belonging to someone who isn't critical because they know their own faults. How much I crave someone transparent but still sweet and gentle as honey on fresh baked dinner rolls. How I stopped touching myself because I'd rather wait for someone special to me to do it. The appreciation I feel when a man is strong even if he's scared to be. The excitement I feel when I accomplish something The respect I'd have for someone mature enough to say what they want and be willing to put in the effort to keep it. The passion I moan with The love I lie alone with The trust I yearn to give The life I crave to live

4/20/2017 9:07:48 PM
Is being overprotective a requirement to own me? I don't know... Probably... I've had a 25 yr potential grab my hand super tight because he thought I was going to cross the street too soon. I've also had an older owner that basically didn't want me around anyone who might have interest in more than friendship even girls. I've had a Master friend recently say a new trucker friend was trying to "sneak up on pussy" lol. It was funny because the friend had an amusing response. I gave the examples to say there's different ways to be overprotective. Some are just generally protective. A protective man even though it can get on my nerves also makes me feel warm and cuddly. Especially if they've seen my babygirl side. It's a want not a need I'll put it that way

4/20/2017 7:47:32 PM
What do D types WISH s types would include in their profiles?

4/20/2017 6:06:19 PM
People sometimes seem to think men only get used for money women only get used for sex, not true. I'm noticing some D types of both genders out to see what they can get: financial, technical, etc. Using the D title to get something without putting in the effort. If I belong to someone I'm cool with supporting your vision for your career or future, but reciprocity must be evident. I'm not about putting free labor into your business or career and walking away with nothing, not even supporting my goals. If I want to help and I don't belong to you I'll volunteer. If I don't, then that means I don't want to. If you need your s type to double as a secretary, manager, Web designer, or atm / investor be clear about that before getting serious so the s type can make an informed decision or a business agreement can be formed. If you're focused on being smooth to get what you need or want, I'm not the one for you. Being straight up is much more effective and fair. If using people's desire for you as a D type, to get what you want without giving dominance, interest, guidance, or business agreements in return is your focus that's sad. Walking away from situations with people and them having work I put in or things to show for it, and me walking away with nothing is not going to be the beat I walk to. Same to s types if he wants to put you through school, invest in your carer, fix your appliances, cut your grass, etc they'll offer or if you ask and they say no leave it. I'm not saying don't ask for or desire help or support I'm saying it's jacked up to use the lifestyle titles to get it if that's your main focus.

4/20/2017 4:03:20 PM
Can you all believe it's almost summer???

4/14/2017 6:28:05 PM
Waiting for a movie so... I'm thinking... it was possible to get me under orgasm control but can I get myself under? Like is it possible? To cum exactly when u want without any other feelings attached? Tonight I'm going to try. I spent a lot of time this week talking about the past... It's not something I do much but I found myself doing it to not have the person feel I don't understand. I think I'm going to stop. Stay forward mentally. Lately I've noticed something. People feel the need to acknowledge my little side. I get me being a little is creepy to some but calling it out makes me just want to hide. So now I notice the voice change. The childlike side. The more men mention it The more I pull it in. Maybe it's my problem but I miss the days I could just be... babygirl and dance around and lay down or skip around and feel safe. I miss being able to show that side without statements made regarding it. I get some things have to end and if we've talked and you've said stuff like "your little voice" it's not only you more than a couple have expressed an alertness regarding it.... It's just... I just... I don't get why. Can't I just be me? Can't my voice change and still see me as me? Can't I get excited or sad and still be me? Or is that a luxury? I've had my share of Jerky backstabbing heartbreakers... But they let me as a babygirl / little be me.... And I just don't know why it's hard for some. So... I'll just either back away from those situations or hide that part

4/12/2017 8:29:11 PM
Laying here topless. Skirt pulled up. I feel the air on my back. Now all I think is a hand creeping up my thigh Caressing me A voice in my ear "i want you, precious" I shiver He whispers "come to bed" Hehe One day soon

4/11/2017 9:30:09 PM
Do I still prefer jealous guys? Jealousy has never really added anything positive to my life excluding some hot grudge fucking. It's actually done the opposite. Plus often times d types that are super jealous are jealous because they are doing dirt themselves. So... No Being jealous is no longer a requirement of someone I'd submit to. Heck earlier today I thought something I've only dreamed of was likely until the friend said "well I'd be jealous if..." My tummy almost turned. A phrase I once thought of as super sexy became nauseating. It wasn't just this... I still feel certain other elements are super sexy but eh jealousy I can take or leave. I think these days it's mainly because I've never seen a man I'd define as genuinely good or deserving of loyalty get jealous. It's usually the ones fronting or lying ones or the ones cheating and feel jealous because they know they deserve to be cheated on but they don't want to be lol. If you're a genuinely good guy and you are super jealous I wanna marry you and have your babies and get your name tatted above my pussy lol. I don't think there's a such thing. Meanwhile, I still don't like when men are like "I'm not the jealous type" lol usually those are the ones who are jealous. But even if it's true ewwwwww. Its like giving me permission to dance all over a line. Saying you aren't jealous is like saying "ok maybe talk to whoever whenever and do whatever" But on the other hand if I'm really into someone I won't flirt even if they aren't jealous... Well I won't flirt in real time anyway lol online, you're just asking for it.

4/11/2017 8:40:09 PM
The deal with being shared.... I was kinda "trained" not to be or to not get enjoyment from it outside of the enjoyment of pleasing said M. I kind of still think I'd desire a Master like that. There's something to be said about a bond where another person isn't to touch you outside of the M approving. On the other hand... Dealings with someone who constantly shared his girl while he was out working kind of intrigues me slightly. So it's like a limbo. I don't think I'd be the person's girl, partly for that reason I'd just find it hard to have a bond when I'm shared while the guy is 500 to 1000 miles away. But I'm questioning myself like I'm older now, all the effort to be an untouched girl didn't really get me anything in terms of better treatment or longevity, so why not toy with it and if someone else owned me I could be one of those girl's that in the past I was baffled by saying "i can't be with you if you don't share me" See a friend mentioned it and I think I scared him with how quick I got curious or willing. So questions... Do you share what's yours? Would you want to share me? s types do you enjoy being shared? I think it's emotional for me because I'm thinking of certain people sharing me and I wanna cry. But this person or someone I'm just cool with its like whatever. When I say share I don't mean in a relationship way I just mean sexually. My friend mentioned sexually but naturally I thought hey now wait lol in the relationship way I thought he was expressing he likes mutual Poly lol. Nope

4/11/2017 7:11:32 AM
Is behaving long distance easy? I don't think it's genuinely long distance if the person can magically appear to beat your ass or whatever. I also don't really feel it's long distance if they're one 1hr flight away for a decent price. For me long dinstance is like.... Different time zone for long periods or two or more flights one way or over 1k miles lol. I don't know if in that situation being good is even worth it. I mean I guess it depends on how strict the person is. Ponders he'd have to be super strict but then I'd get irritated with the strictness because of the distance. Lol I'm odd. I didn't do my essay because I was distracted by men folk. Lol I know, bad girl. Well too bad because no daddy or Master is around and I've done other stuff on time so there! Why am I even thinking long distance I need too much strictness to be obedient long distance. It's funny you think you have long distance and then realize you don't. If I like a guy's rig better than him does that make me materialistic? It's only because he's mean and his truck isn't lol. Speaking of the devil....

4/11/2017 6:47:43 AM
Last night was.... Enjoyable

4/10/2017 3:45:33 PM
Ooooo I'm about to make a scene playlist lol
Ehehehe

4/10/2017 10:27:21 AM
Five ways to know it's gone 1. If you're always complaining or have an issue with your slave or Master like everyday. 2. If you are always waiting for them to leave or walk away 3. If you're stressed more than happy 4. If they expect you to make changes when they haven't changed anything at all in their life 5. If material things are what the relationship is based upon or you two have drastically different versions of what took place. Just things to watch out for. If any of those occur occasionally that's expected maybe, but all or most of them, consistently is a sign that you're hanging on to nothing for nothing. No one deserves to waste precious time like that. Hope everyone has a lovely day. Now my turn to ask... If a new Dom isn't into picking clothes should the girl just respect that, even if she isn't his yet? Or should she just let him know it's important to her? To me being dressed is important so I basically said "if you aren't comfy dressing me there's no future" i think I was a bit harsh. What I meant was to me certain types of micromanagement establish a bond and certain types are just annoying lol but dressing me establishes a level of dependence and trust, so if a potential isn't willing somebody else will and that's teaching me it's ok to turn to another for my needs. If that's what they rather cool, but I won't feel connected. It'll start with clothes, then food, before you know it'll be don't have sex with him or him or him or.... Fuck that's sexy mmmmmm....

4/9/2017 9:45:38 PM
You thrust Your lust My trust My bust Is yours To have So green Don't laugh So gold Won't glitter Your pole My spitter You told Me no quitter I'll hold your heart's center Together I never Felt better About ever Being focused If you own this I'm growing To give hopeless Romance Another chance So dance Hold hands A glance Hit foreign lands Our plans I comprehend Your angle No fronts No double lives No stunts Make love He yells cum I do It's true Those who hurt you For shits and giggles Knew Exactly why No need to cry Tears licked Your balls twitched My palms Upon them Your spanks upon my clit I thank For all of it Lessons came Heart felt pain Wisdom aged No playing games Peace received Truth believed Lies leave Spies deceived Webs weaved The stuck don't breathe They suffocate In the heat they cleave My love escapes It doesn't leave Make no mistake Not here to tease If you take Be sure to see What you crave Is it what you need? If so I'll be happy Total Control From owning Devoted and loving You'd see If you'll hold it consistently This leash The controlling I'll love you eternally Following Your lead

4/9/2017 9:19:53 PM
:-) hehe

4/5/2017 6:22:31 PM
This year I will finally be loved by a mate a Master a Daddy.

4/5/2017 6:08:30 PM
Me: I want a story My friend who is also a Master goes: once upon a time goldilocks got raped by the 3 bears That ladies and gentlemen is how you scar a little Yes, I know I have mean twisted friends Hides behind my own chair and builds a fort

4/5/2017 1:38:42 AM
I'm going to type up some particulars for live in because if it does happen people deserve to know things ahead of time, so I'll work on that later today. I'm getting a tad bit excited, but not sure why. The law of attraction. If you're a Daddy Dom or Master that happens to enjoy being the focus of attention for a potential, currently if we started chatting you'd be the only D type with my attention. I finally let it go with Mr 420, as said before we'll probably always be friends, but that's that. If I'm interested in you I'm big on mutual pursuits or being pursued. If you're expecting me to chase you or push hard, it's not happening. As for first call or first messaging I sometimes do that if it's appreciated. If I'm mistreated lol no I won't make an effort to contact you first. Nor will I give respect that isn't deserved.

4/4/2017 3:35:02 PM
So why does spring always feel so short? Baseball amusement parks Grilling and breeze The joys of spring Who is ready for the games tonight?

4/3/2017 8:11:23 PM
Story please

4/2/2017 8:18:14 PM
I'm curious about something...
I've hidden a few people because if we don't message but I see your pic in my who's viewing me pretty often it's like "huh".
I kind of wonder why click a profile kinda often of someone you don't speak to.....
Then I thought maybe to check pics or read the journal, but it's possible to do without actually clicking "view full profile"
To read blog post just scroll down if I pop up.
To check pics just click to left or right if I pop up in your search or feed...
 I just find it slightly perplexing I suppose...
If the same amount of people that checked my profile repeatedly, offered me real time cuddles, I'd be quite a fulfilled girl.

It's just that, I think maybe that's one reason so many people leave cs...
Same people... all the time kinda  blah


3/27/2017 4:35:59 PM
Just submitted my essay... It's shorter this time because, well it was allowed to be, and because I had fun writing it. I looked at other essays and saw how everyone had their unique style, and this time I took the journalist standpoint which is my favorite. I even threw some puns in there lol. I hope he's cool with it.

It's odd, yesterday was pretty crappy, I went from my phone breaking kinda, to feeling pretty bored and down, to today I received some good news. Don't let one day get you down. Don't let bad news stop you from your dreams.

Only thing I didn't do today... Eat... Which I think I'm about to do.

So 4 pieces of bacon, 2 eggs, half a small zucchini, and half a small tomato later. With a few spoons of applesauce.... Yeah I know I didn't eat 2 peas lol. I rarely eat after 8, but I think I'll be ok.

3/26/2017 12:05:16 PM
Just saw a Poly Leather Master with his babygirl and I'm just like.... Sigh, if more people would be comfortable and honest about being mono or Poly, I swear relationships would increase and so would peace. I like monogamy, but I also love the transparency within polyamory. Then I think of situations where people had the makings for it, and I guess deep down they didn't want it or didn't want to embrace the reciprocity and maturity that must exist for it to be fruitful. Not sure what type of relationship(s) I'll go into, but I'm aware of what types i won't.

3/25/2017 7:42:22 PM
Feeling generally sub which can be good or bad... So I spent most of the day at the park. It was fun. Can someone help me get freshened up? Bath or shower? Panties or no? Body spray or scented butter? Maybe it will wear off, but if it doesn't I'm going to post a few of these. If you are into fiction check out the marketplace if you haven't already if you have I have another for you, and if you're into nonfiction I've been reading a few books that I think are great for slaves. One book I was stomping to get my hands on is now out on Kindle and it went so deep I have to close it and say let me stop and read this when I'm owned because the mind frame it had me heading toward was a bit too deep for a s type unowned. Like I was already considering heading in that direction but I know it's risky... I also notice how reading books that don't deal with bdsm help me communicate and respond In other news with Mr 420 yep that's what I'm calling him (or if you're reading this You) no word from him, but again that's how we roll. So idk if we'll link up next month or not, but if that's the plan I need to know something so I can grab a flight and pencil him in, my plans for April are starting already and it's more a first cum first serve lol I guess pun is kinda intended lol. There's really no rush, but some D types wait until the last minute to make plans and then get "irritated" when a girl is not accessible or I already have arrangements, well ya don't get to take priority if you're making a guest appearance, that's just me.

3/24/2017 8:20:35 PM
masterd34 decided to ask "are you a shemale, yes or no" Sorry to ruin his hopes but no. How do guys expect to recover from asking a girl that? Like seriously. I could crack on picture how it's so close to... But I'm not going to. In other news, I am serving myself a slice of humble pie. I thought someone I'm close to didn't tell me happy bday. Technically he didn't but I hadn't been on fb messenger in a while. So I download it tonight and then I see it... I still wish he would have called, but he thought to message me on the day OF even though our phone conversation right before my bday ended kinda odd. He turns into a meanie when 420 hits. Anyway I'm kinda smiling now and it's not like I complained to him about it, we haven't talked since then which is kinda just how he is in general he's the type who needs space when not in person. So anyway I'm not grouchy at him anymore and if I'm not taken by then looking forward to linking up sometime soon. I don't think we'll ever have a M/s relationship we are just too different in that way, but it's great to be around the only M Type who I'm totally sure is attracted to me physically. No it's not all about looks, but it's still new to me to have someone look at me like he does. We totally get along in the vanilla way and that in itself is probably why we probably will stay cool. I wonder if he will still be my friend if I'm owned... I doubt it, but who knows.

3/24/2017 8:28:56 AM
I enjoy the group discussions and I get the reviving of chat rooms. It's a positive in a way, but sometimes answering questions reminds me I'm Unowned in an annoying way. Sometimes seeing those in chat rooms with online relationships makes me say "huuuh, is it really that major and if it is that major how can it be fulfilled by using a word as serious as Owned in regards to someone you've never met?" Then I see people in relationships with doms or "masters" doing stupid stuff that I'm quite familiar with and some stupid stuff I wouldn't even take and I become again content, almost dare I say happy that I am unowned and don't have to worry about lies, or overflowing obligations, or if people are or aren't in 50 million relationships without telling you lol. Compared to that stuff being unowmed is way more peaceful. I don't know anyone that's married that is my picture of happy. I only personally know two women that are slaves that are faithful and take it seriously. I only personally know one M Type that has been transparent to my knowledge even if he did make his girl shave her head hehe. So I guess I'm saying pickings are slim and at least being unowned I don't have to deal with immaturity or craziness or someone else's fear ruining my future. It happens every day. So it's Tricky. I want to be owned, but I want it to be right. I want to be possessed but I also want peace. If those can't coexist, I'm alright until it can.

3/23/2017 2:06:39 PM
If you're a Daddy in or frequent Hagerstown or Reading PA, there's a girl who might be interested. 5'5 and medium build, African American and big tits. She's 20 so I'm thinking she doesn't want to go over 50 and if she does I'm not helping her do it, she's too young for all the obligations. I don't know her personally but she seems cool and she's looking hard for a Daddy Dom so being a hopeless romantic I want to help. If interested let me know, please have a clear decent pic, decent meaning combed hair clean clothes, no mountain man looks.

3/23/2017 6:17:58 AM
Bounces up and down Good lovely morning to everyone isn't it a glorious day??? Yes, yes it is.

3/22/2017 8:19:46 PM
Lays in bed What are you doing right now

3/19/2017 6:20:39 PM
The weekend was alright... Could have been better lol I woke up at 4am this morning, no reason that I'm aware of. Haven't been to sleep since. Here's to decent bedtimes. One day someone will hold you and say "this is where you belong" They'll actually mean it. How will you know? Actions

3/18/2017 9:27:39 PM
So how about a midnight spanking outside in the wind? I know I have to be quiet I would put my panties in my mouth but you don't let me wear them So I'll try being quiet After If I'm good I'd really love to suck you until you moan in pleasure and release Then we could shower Together I could crawl between your legs I could suckle you And fall to sleep Wake up to give you a morning blow job Go make breakfast And while you eat I'd fall back to sleep You might wake me with something ready to slide into my bum Oooooo I would like a story Somebody tell me one So I can fall to sleep It's not an easy daddyless night

3/13/2017 7:08:51 PM
I can look at my school work and tell when I'm going through stuff lol. It's funny but it's not. One class I have all A's but one assignment is missing and it was a stressful week when I wasn't focused... My last 3 assignments have been early lol. Shrugs, it might sound hippie like when I say I need peace, but it's serious. When I have peace in my life everything else goes better. It's also why I'd need a gentle Master / Daddy. Strict yes, but still gentle. Don't get me wrong, I love meanies as friends. I love outspoken couldn't care about my feelings D types as friends. When looking at owning me it doesn't take all that. Waaaay back in the day when I decided I'd offer myself as a slave, it was the person's gentleness that made me do it. He wasn't an a hole, he wasn't arrogant, he didn't cast me aside, not back then. A hand on my thigh or a quick backhand was enough. Even a potential I was considering his gentleness is what did it, besides the fact that I..., Nevermind. When I say gentleness I don't mean he let me have my way, I mean in our friendship spanning a few years he has NEVER raised his voice except that one time I got water on his floor lol. He would make his voice do this thing that let me know he was serious and that was enough. They both happen to be the last to have my cookie lol. I'm not saying be gentle or I won't fuck you, or am I? Of course not, sex is too easy for men to get I'm not saying that. What I am saying is, a gentle Master is very strong and motivating to me. Now let me get back to my little essay. Somebody kik or text me to keep me company if ya have my info. I finished the essay and my cuddly evil friend kept me company now I'm in bed... What is your name on here anyway? I know it has evil in it... Humph

3/12/2017 8:35:42 PM
I just had a nice little fantasy. I'm going to do my best to stay 115 or 120 so that fantasy can happen. If I'm snatched up by a man that wants me bigger he better be able to lift the size he wants me to get lol. That fantasy IS going to happen!
update: 3/13/17 soooo um people wanna know what the fantasy is... That's between myself and whoever gets in the position for me to want them to fulfill it. I was just sharing my excitement from having a fantasy because usually I don't have a fantasy unless I belong or have a potential. Right now that's not the case, so I was shocked to have a fantasy at all.

3/12/2017 7:53:11 PM
Someone asked what I meant by stable, I answered but others may also be curious... When I type stable or stability I mean lacking off and on. Talking things out, even if it means a day or week apart, still coming together and getting through it and sticking together. Knowing that no matter who pops up we will have each other's defense. We will not get all swervey and swayed. Just because I think bob is sexy I won't ignore you. Just because Paula decides to be nice today doesn't mean you'll act as if I'm trash. Stability is something I won't compromise on. How about you? Also thank you to the people that responded to the post below this one. It gave me some things to think about, smile about, miss, and reminded me we all have our tough journey days.

3/8/2017 8:58:41 AM
Do you Masters and Daddies and Doms get the same way we do when we really miss the bond and struggle with not having the dynamic? I really believe compatible people are out there for me. I also get maybe it's not my time yet. On days like today, that positivity doesn't make it any easier. A few of said I'm Unowned by choice. I agree and disagree. I didn't choose who I'm compatible with or who breaks my heart or who isn't ready or who has baggage or who is so far away my safety isn't guaranteed or who gets off on jumping in and out of a s types life. That is simply life not my choosing. On the other hand I get it because I could tolerate all that stuff and still sit there craving M/s which in my opinion would be ignorant. So I don't. I'm just curious, do you guys have tough days missing M/s? From what I hear not really, people just grab whoever because they're accessible and put on a smile, but I guess you can still miss the dynamic. How do you guys cope? Let me know

3/6/2017 6:40:45 PM
I wanna make love to the sounds of a sax Like in the bathroom at a jazz club or dark corner What I like about Poly men? Just because somebody likes them doesn't mean you can't still like them... No questions cause they tell you already.

3/6/2017 6:06:08 PM
Can we cuddle by the fire? Will you order me to bed? May I get wet when I hear your tires? Will you kiss me when you walk in? Could I do as you ask? Would you like to be the last? Dick inside of me? Hand on my ass? Maybe not the hand cause I'm kind of a flirt Does that make your temper stand and want to correct me via hurt? Physically I mean Can you really be my King? Jazz at night, my nails scratch you as I cream? Could you be the Master who brings longevity? And all youd take away is the best cause I'd give it easily Would you want me not cause you lack, but because I give what you need? Do you see I'm not a void filler, but pleasure I aim to deliver? Would you groan all night as my little body quivers? I'm just curious

3/3/2017 8:01:07 AM
Taste me Make me Taste you Be true Be free At peace together When you find me I will Be ready Like a tower you are behind me That's what I really need A strong force No negative discourse Making each other better Are you sexy in leather My hair? You love the texture And even if things aren't great You don't let that make me escape I don't wanna cause I'd love ya More importantly I'd trust ya I can't wait til you arrive I can imagine a pleasure to fuck ya Some start with love end with despise You and I won't The structure that you'll give As our stability grows You'll be an added reason for me to live Anyone around me will know No past relationships on either side putting a hold On our bond We know how to let go And move forward so we can cling to each other I'll call you daddy but we'll be tight like a bestie, a brother No worrying at night if you're chasing another You'll be straight up and treat me right, beat me like a Master and fuck me like a lover As you age I'll better gage Your moods and desires We'll turn each page smiling together due to this bond we've acquired

1/26/2017 12:57:59 PM
Why do people even read this??? Why act like my thoughts and feelings even matter? If they did so many things in my life wouldn't have happened... I think out of all the opinions and unsolicited advice from people who should take their own advice and assumptions only a few have really understood my points or message. I deal with it But just dealing with it isn't getting results... So it's gonna be motivation. I'm not using this journal anymore It's no point Any messages about this entry will fucking be deleted and fucking ignored

1/21/2017 9:31:20 PM
So ya.... If you have the # you aren't being ignored my texting isn't working I guess... You can call or Kik me

1/19/2017 7:19:56 PM
I'm not crazy I just like Rules regulations possessiveness trust spankings grudge fucking role playing passion love deep warm kisses holding hands giving orders making me feel so submissive

1/17/2017 4:37:19 PM
I've been a bit quick with people lately mainly because I'm sick of people who have people not appreciating it. Who am I to judge? All I can do is my best to appreciate the one(s) I end up with, but I always do. I don't see a reason not to. I can only control me.

1/17/2017 4:08:40 PM
Being unowned sucks right now only right now I want a controlling man with a pole to bounce on Like so fucking badly right now Mmmmm You guys understand right??

1/16/2017 8:33:29 AM
Anyone here who doesn't masturbate and hasn't had sex in a year or longer please message me I'm curious about your experience I don't mean an a sexual

1/16/2017 6:46:30 AM
Soft touches and kisses Snuggles and wax Caresses and scratches upon your back Tastes like candy and sex on top of that John Mayer won't mind If bodies combine You'll find It's been a long time Since I aligned With a man of your kind I'll pour the wine Made dinner for you to dine If you have it make time I'll begin at your feet I'll climb You like a pole I think you would know How much I have to offer How I yearn to grow For a special type One to share my life Focused on peace and progression No anger and strife And even that ends in heat Because you love to beat I can take the heat If you can Cool me down With no release Besides your cum

1/16/2017 6:15:18 AM
I am soooo aroused my nipples are so hard... Wishing for a naughty daddy to tease me. Then love me, but right now tease will do lol. I really want my nipples licked and pussy played with and a spanking then slow passionate sex until I beg to cum. In this lifestyle I rarely think about my sexual needs, but I'd love to be taken care of like that.

1/12/2017 4:02:14 PM
I just realized why single 30 yr olds go clubbing... Because otherwise what will you do on a Thursday or Friday night? Think about how being single is only fun in summer yet I manage to be selective until chemistry and longevity appears... Until then what shall I do?

1/6/2017 11:02:30 AM
Everyone is hating on my middle side today All she needs is some one to control most of what she does and make her behave and maybe fuck her sheesh I'm so open to poly but today in my middle mood I need a daddy disciplinarian that's only focused on me lol and his career. First thing he'd probably make me do is eat shower and walk my dog it's 2 and I didn't do any of it I'm just laying in bed seeking attention on my phone so he'd probably snatch it At least you guys here like me. Everyone have a great weekend to my pal enjoy lyn lol Ttyl

12/31/2016 6:32:28 PM
If a guy calls you bird maybe you act like you have wings Giggles I owe someone a package holiday stuff got in the way but u have not been stiffed

12/31/2016 4:21:40 PM
Wishing you all a low to no stress, positive, new year!!

12/30/2016 9:01:45 PM
Is cuddles, care, peace, d/s really too much to ask for? It isn't because i offer it. Hold me if I'm tipsy Ask if you're curious. Love me because I'm good to you and deserve to be loved Have me whole not just a part of me that puts a smile on your face. You'll have my all if you offer at least half of what I'm giving. I know I'll be someone's prized girl one day and when i am, everything I've been through will be even more worth it. Positive vibes to everyone

12/30/2016 6:39:08 PM
She's telling caning stories and the girl is just like um um um al alright blush blush She's like ooo it's gonna break a lot of skin The girl is just like um um well alright lucky subs i guess

12/30/2016 4:01:05 PM
Your nipples on my tongue You could be the only one Damn daddy you're so hung And even if you're not I'll suck you like I'm sprung From inhibitions I guess I have too much innocence For a girl my age so corrupt me with new positions Have me sore for days and attenpt to grasp my submission You need a maid? Cool it'll be my mission Massages feel great? It's often how i convey my feelings If i make a mistake communication won't have me reeling If it lacks then escape is the best way for me to keep chilling But if you get me you got me and if you got me it's good If you hit me you like me and if you like me I'm good If you need me that's new If it's new i need you too Teach me to hate lame so i recognize truth Show me its not a game and i promise I'll trust you If I'm genuinely your aim let's see what we can do

12/30/2016 11:48:13 AM
A master person thingy said the worst thing u can do is let a woman think she's making u healthy or taking care of you. I think he meant a woman you aren't interested in, because if you are interested wouldn't her thinking she's caring for you be a positive?

12/29/2016 6:25:10 AM
The answer to the question is 42 lol

12/25/2016 9:39:50 PM
7am will b here soon Sweet cuddles I don't wanna sleep yet I wanna feel kept Then I'd rest in many ways. Wanted genuinely whether things are great or not Is that wrong to crave Nope not if it can be acquired Night

12/25/2016 4:45:34 PM
I hear I'm obedient in real time then asked why I'm not collared... No one has displayed a sincere consistent desire to keep me and what does a collar mean if not that I am kept? He smiles and caresses her

12/25/2016 12:28:27 PM
It's hard turning me on, but once I'm on the off switch is hard to find. Is that bad? Happy Holidays

12/24/2016 5:46:02 PM
Flirt is just a friendly loving intellectual real teacher hehe I did not post this my middle side did Please refer any ass whooping to her Thank you and gnite Smiles I feel good

12/23/2016 9:29:10 AM
Short term contracts are not always bad or about someone getting their rocks off. I'm starting to think they can be mutually beneficial.

12/19/2016 7:33:00 AM
I started to call someone close to me who claims to want me for xmas and share these thoughts, but he told me he'd be busy so... I will share it with you guys, that's what little unowned girls do, right? I woke up Horny for you Wanting you to let me lick your lolli and shower me up. Wanting you to molest my little kitty on the way to your errands Wanting to whimper for you because you put snow on my pussy Wanting to moan as you play Nina simone lol Mmmmm I'm so turned on So busy thinking of your hands all over me So busy pleading you won't make me cum again I need a nasty daddy today F u c k!!! If I had one this would totally be a day I couldn't do anything but work and be with him because my mind is so deep in the gutter Piss running down my clit nice and hot would be lovely mmmmm FYI: if you've never fucked me but pop up fussing at me for posting this I'll probably just laugh it off... But it depends on how genuine your fussing is, it might just turn me on and make me offer myself lol Maybe I shouldn't talk to anyone today lol No mas

12/13/2016 3:11:37 PM
Hugs everyone Thanks for reading through and being around to share the ups and downs. Take care. Hit me in the box if ya need or send me your name on f life to keep up with each other.

12/13/2016 3:07:35 PM
So let me answer a question but first the winner of the drawing... Is Thornblood Please send me your info so I can send your prize. Also I need what type of scent you like. Thanks for entering to those who did Now to answer what's wrong with California. I'm just not living there nor am I having a serious bond with someone who lives there.

12/13/2016 6:01:40 AM
Good morning... So I gotta pick my tea since I've been up a while. Then I shall pick the name as I drink it. Then I gotta pick stuff for my domme friend and this year I'm learning to gift her as a friend and not more, like in the past. It's tempting to spoil her rotten, but no lol, just like it's tempting for her to command me instead of ask, but we both knew the facts. So yea... I'm really just wanting to get away. Not the next city or a state over, but really away. I know I was just away, but shrugs. Oh the comment about xmas some guys are wondering if I have someone in mind... I'll let yall wonder hehe, but I don't currently belong to anyone so I'm fair game. It's almost officially winter so even though I say that in a teasing way, I don't say it with a smile. It's odd an associate who might see this messaged me last night basically saying he feels he's the best option for an offer I put out probably because he's been pursuing me off and on since like 2013. Don't look at me, I'm innocent. It's not about physical attraction or lack thereof and more about cockiness and getting grouchy and being mean to me. But eh Idk... I guess I should feel some level of comfort because I kinda know him but... Eh Idk... This whole yr has been about me "trying" and "giving chances" when it came to potentials because people close to me didn't think I did. I guess technically the year isn't over. See when I'm owned I don't have to think about this stuff. Lol

12/12/2016 7:45:39 PM
Sooo yea I hit Jim beam honey on an empty stomach for a night cap... And people wonder why I need micromanagement. Lol I don't really drink like that and it's my first time ever having whisky. I drink girlie fruity stuff, not whisky. I'm already borderline my generally submissive mood, that'll probably hit in a few days. But I do feel like I'm really relaxed. I'm gonna be ok right? Right? I will pick the name tomorrow, sorry today was a ufff day.

12/8/2016 6:17:13 PM
I want attention!!! And a tuck in!! And and and I sensitive! Coddle me?

12/8/2016 12:02:04 PM
Yall might wanna hold me back kinda joking but serious!! my middle side will go to the mattresses with this chick lmao. If a s type approaches a d type that I like or belong to I stand down with the quickness unless he's genuine enough to admit he's poly, I'm like whatever she can have him lots of decent d types in the world BUT... My unmarried D type friends, nope! I aint standing down for nothing!!! In this case lol, he was feeding me cookies and hot cocoa before he even knew she existed lol. I aint gotta be on a friends list or page lol. He said she's gonna get it ok cool but if she doesn't stand down she's gonna be rocked so hard she'll think I was a Domme lol. My middle side doesn't play that. And that goes for my other d type friends. If they have girls I respect that but if they're brand spanking new coming at me crazy ahha they will see a WHOLE different side! I don't give a flying flip how much they take your pain or screw you! I was here FIRST! I'm not leaving unless I decide or the D type decides. So get froggy if ya want lol. Now back to your regularly scheduled maybeher Oh and if it sounds odd I'd stand down on a partner but not a friend lol d types as my friends usually are genuine with me, I respect them. D types as potentials or mates will hide, lie, deceive, and come and go. My friendships with d types have lasted longer than any d/s or M/s off and on stuff. That's maybeher's stand, what's yours? Check my footwork Lol yes I have a feisty side. Now I feel better See if I really wanted to be catty I'd add him to my list JUST to flex, but I'm gonna chill. My lifestyle energy isn't even focused on that.

12/8/2016 9:32:12 AM
:-):-):-)

12/6/2016 8:08:40 PM
Sooo I'm listening to slow jams right... And I find this earlier song by neyo. It didn't get radio play for obvious reasons but but B U T!!! Even though he's a guy he expressed the equivalent of how I feel about jealous dudes lol He explained it perfectly! I knew neyo was a freak lol If you don't like pop/ r&b don't play it or just listen to the words and make a girl sing it instead This song explains why I like crazy guys because it's SEXY!https://youtu.be/PU6-2RSkA_c

12/6/2016 3:35:25 PM
So guess who called me. The lingerie place. My favorite set out of the order isn't even sold anymore. Yes I have a refund, but it was so cute! It had a butterfly on it. Guys are silk robes still sexy? I haven't had a piggyback ride or been picked up in almost a year. Isn't there some law protecting me from this type of stuff?

12/6/2016 9:04:48 AM
Drawing is on the 10th thanks to those that entered And to the jokes about entering me lol if you had some size to ya it won't be easy lol.

12/5/2016 5:20:38 PM
Do you ever post ads and think no one will reply? And then feel like "oh" when they do... Sometimes it's like that. I wan coddles!!! Not cuddles coddles cause everyone that could give good cuddles is too far so I'll settle for being coddled lol

12/4/2016 2:44:58 PM
I decided what my first tat will be... And oddly it's not what I thought for years it would be. Very simple, yet motivating. I'm ready for it.

12/3/2016 3:01:41 PM
For tonight ya wanna adore me? Really, you wanna assure me? That you're genuinely interested and not just Horny? Hmmm that makes me shy Got me slanting little eyes I love I mean I like it when doms put hands on my thighs And just let them rest Telling me to STAY dressed Kinda unique right? Well distinct is the best You don't have to press I'm looking at you like you want Daddy to be how I address? You, make me wonder Coming at me like thunder Not too strong but still gotta hunger Mmmm I already know you're a hunter Cause you found me at my strong points Instead of trying to make me weak In you I sense more strength Waiting for a type where we see each other as a need You're older? Ok teach! Got advice? Cool preach! You know I'm hard to get and easy as pie to keep? Wanna swing a couple hits? Master give me the heat Beat this little ass like an African stampede You wanna coddled me once a month and treat me like a dream? You get cool points if you don't wonder exactly what that means Take all my sides: slave, babygirl, slut, and let my masochist scream Why I treat you so well? Because you'll be King

12/2/2016 2:02:15 PM
Kiss me deeply please Push me to my knees Instruct me to suck it Give my throat a squeeze Almost cum Growl that you want it My pussy Want me? Pick me up if you will Show me passion is real I've been void of it a while Be strong, be brave, claim me with a smile If you can't... stand down If it's hidden... another should be found I'm not the one I need strength, integrity, and honor That describes the Master I need You thrust inside In front of the world Always own me with pride Train me to be sure That no woman can scare you Or call your shots If you're fucking me your aren't getting fucked by some vanilla who is not You're Master no matter where As you pull my hair You kiss me and whisper "you are her, I declare If I have others you'll know because you don't run me bitch If I have things to handle I'm still Master, I don't switch Most importantly even those close to me know it You'll always be mine forever, isn't that your wish" I couldn't ask for better I yearn for one like this And until he finds me *giggles* i guess poly or trusting no one it is. Been a while since a man has slid in me, I see no signs of that changing (by choice) but if the above ever occurs he'll have a lot to teach me or help refresh me on. I think me being unowned this long is good because it's almost like whoever is getting a brand new slave with a Lil knowledge

12/1/2016 12:18:59 PM
I noticed there's a few messages and I'll get to them, but right now my eyes are tired.
I just finished on the phone and I have a question.
Have any of you ever been handling nilla stuff and then the person on the phone so sounds soooo freaking sexy???
This lady sounded amazing!
It was like a warm but smooth tone to her voice, and I was like O M G. A bit masculine
and Dominant. She heard a bit of feeling sad in my voice because the answer to one of questions was no, and mmmmmm the way she said "it's ok" I wanted to rip hear clothes off, slam my head between her pussy lips, and just worship her for hours!!!!
That has NEVER happened with a woman before just from her voice.
Ok now back to life, ttyl.

11/29/2016 7:38:05 PM
Ok ok last post for today I promise. In the words of a Master friend I've "had ass on my mind a lot lately". Lmao I really laughed when I saw that text, but I had no rebuttal. So, I'm still curious... What goes through your mind when performing anal? Please no it depends I know it depends, but if she's yours and she's screaming or pleading as you enter her, what's going through your mind at that moment? What are you thinking or feeling? Top 3 thoughts or feelings if one is too narrow. Mmmmm narrow and anal... Frick! I'm not gonna cum I'm not gonna cum... Night gents. I'll read responses as I fall to sleep. Everyone is welcome to answer cause I'm really curious.

11/29/2016 5:29:00 PM
Rory told dean on the gilmore girls revival "you taught me what safe felt like" Swoon, it was so romantical. I totally identify with her on that. He literally fought for her. He punked this knucklehead for picking on her, he built the girl a freaking car for floggers sake. He's super tall, super jealous, and super protective. Uff... I want someone to remind me how that feels. Is it so wrong to want longevity in all this? Is it so bad to desire Stability? It's almost like you have to pick: jealous and possessive but won't last forever because you'll never be a priority or appreciated. Or stability and longevity but no passion or protection. That's alright I'll rock solo if that's how the choices go. There is always poly but not many are willing to share, even if they have exactly what they want. I'm staying positive, the Dean is out there.

11/29/2016 12:43:36 PM
Fellas I'm not moving to Alaska. It's cold!!!

11/29/2016 6:38:02 AM
Why look to others for the closure that YOU need? Sometimes a person's actions or lack of are closure enough. Sometimes the way you treated them shows you'd never offer closure. Sometimes the way they treated you lets you know it's a door you should have been sure was closed long ago. Every once in a while it's not closure that is needed, but another way to open up. I'm not the type to chase and if a friendship of a few yrs can just vanish unexplained, then oh well. With women who know me I have a rep of "not trying" or "not giving it a chance" after something juvenile is done mind you lol. Well this year, I said I'd try, I said I'd give it an honest chance with D types and dating Vanillas even if things were done that I'd normally take as yellow flags or exit signs... I did! So no more hearing anything about wanting people to be perfect in relationships or brushing people off, or "acting" hard to get. Why do I care what others think? Sometimes the opinions of those close to me does matter. Also, I wanted to prove to myself that I could do it. That I could show endurance, tolerance, and the ability to ignore my gut (which I really don't feel you should need with a potential). So it's been a year. Now hopefully I can get back to interacting in a way that's comfortable for me. Smiles I look at the relationships of those who aren't single and I see the stress, neglect, disloyalty, and sometimes anguish and I'm like "yall can keep it." Committed relationships are the one place I feel should be free of extreme worry and confusion.

11/28/2016 7:28:15 PM
Sometimes if you want something in life you gotta go for it, address it strong but warm, caress it, and if it's right you will possess it...

11/28/2016 10:11:26 AM
Guys I'm big on attention and clarity, if you don't have time for potentials don't expect them to have time for you later, unless of course they've agreed to do so. I get life happens, but I'm looking to share a life or combine a few lol. If you aren't, let's be genuine about it and you can be a fwb or something.

11/26/2016 8:47:44 AM
omg they have athletic christmas stockings? uff and people wonder why I want a holiday hubby lol someone to spoil with holiday food, snuggles, and a few festive gifts, not to mention all the romanticism the holiday offers, and holiday lingerie mmmmm he'd just rip it off anyway or maybe he'd bind me in it and torture me a bit, blood is red ya know? add a green bruise and I'm all festive too lol. Ummmm romanticism it's a word lol I could cum just from saying it just like psychologize I love fun words that seem so cool and sexy people are like is that a word? lol

11/26/2016 7:18:47 AM
So what's up with the flirting?
A friend and I discussed this and I end up talking about it when potentials love boasting about not minding a girl flirting. For example, it's hot if a Master sends a text about someone flirting or swinging at you, before you even notice it lol that's close enough to jealousy even though he may not see it as such, flirting can inspire vigilance and vigilance is *giggles*. Just something about it feels... Like... All warm, and fuzzy, and stuffs lol (that kind of thing not only appeals to me as an s but also my babygirl side). It's kinda a protective warmth from it. That's not why I flirt... That's just a hot bonus.
I think many see jealousy as this horrible, violent, crazy type thing... That's not the definition of jealousy, and if it were, some people might still flow with it. That's what I'll say about that (yes I saw forest gump the other day).
I learned often times when I flirted it was more me trying to be nice, or playful. After a hair pull and some other consequences I learned it was flirting lol (whatever I bloomed late alright). Occasionally if I wasn't happy with how I was being treated or neglected I'd flirt too.
Being unowned flirting has the added possibility of something coming from and that's kinda exciting. Plus, I sometimes think the right type will just hop in my box or call me and put a stop to it, and after I wipe the cream from my cookie I'll offer my submission lol. Yea yea I know it's a dream, but it came close once. A guy from the past popped in my box while I was kinda randomly flirting online for like a week straight, (how was I supposed to know he was watching he wasn't even on my friends list lol) basically saying "you're acting crazy, I will come down or fly you up and put a stop to it" I knew he was serious, and it was hot but we never had a relationship and one wasn't gonna form solely because of that, close but no cigar.
Another reason I flirted was because it's not something I'd do in person, that just wasn't my style. So online it felt good to just be free in that way.
Lately... My flirting, at least online lol, has died waaaayyy down (screw you I got witnesses). Mainly because, I know what type of D or M I am drawn to and since my fantasy of him spotting me flirting and putting it to a stop isn't likely, I chose to settle down a bit because the future person or persons may only approach me if I'm behaving myself. If the s on persons bothered you, mmmmmmmm you are probably my type hehehe. I've got issues I know. So yes, since I desire to be found, I decided to chill. Plus I kinda had a few potentials pass through and I was genuinely trying to be a good girl.
There might be other reasons, but that's basically the rise and fall of my flirting lol.
I still do sometimes, simply because lol I'm unowned, and I can, and I haven't been backhanded in forever (aaayyeee that is NOT a random public invite to hit me) lol.


11/16/2016 6:03:29 PM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8dM5QYdTo08

I'll let your love adorn me
If you let my tightness assure you
That it's yours
And encores
Don't pour
If there's not more
Than a desire
Please acquire
This girl Sire
Yep with an e
This girl? I meant me
I belong on my knees
But I promise I'll figure out how to fly if me in the trees
Would make you pleased
If I can't fly
I was a tomboy I'll climb
As long our bond isn't destroyed and that perfect smile will shine...
I'm good

11/16/2016 3:58:06 PM
Soooo I'm finally getting a toiletry bag and some packing cubes, lol. Im choosing between orange and colorful polka dot, help me pick? Thanks to the D types for the help polka dot it is! Yea yea yea I know it's proof I still don't like making decisions sometimes so what

11/16/2016 9:56:40 AM
This isn't play to me!!! Have I played at some point, yea but I'm not on here seeking play. I'm not on here wanting to play... I seek something far deeper.
Am I gonna compare you? Subconsciously probably. Why? Because I've had synergy I've had compatibility, I've had passion filled domination, I've had all that, and I'm still hungry for it. So yea.. That's the best way I can put it.
I'm sorry... I'm sorry for being so fricking picky. I'm sorry I like guys who are gentle and super possessive and romantic, I'm sorry none of that really goes together.
Why am I sorry.... Because today for the first tim in maybe ever I'm seeing so many people split up roles like you can't be it all. I'm sorry because I feel like I should apologize for wanting what I crave. I feel sorry that some people are just in this to use for monetary gain or temporary space fillers and I'm sorry that I am not that way. If I were my life would be much easier but I'm not. I'm me and whoever I end up with will get M E.

11/15/2016 12:19:42 PM
In life, if you are patient, you'll see exactly, what you need to... I did.. And scene Shrugs

11/14/2016 1:38:35 PM
So I was asked if they said come would I come... The few times the topic arises I always think orgasm control and sometimes I kinda try but... I just... I won't say I can't, something in me just won't. Don't get me wrong, I've cum but cumming on command... It's been a while. In a way I'm glad to have that control not to cum for anyone who says it, even in a sexy way, but on the other hand... I don't know... I was close to cumming on command a yr ago, but naturally it had to be another freaking scorpio... Although my heart was in it my mind was still floating elsewhere... If he had gained my mind, if I had gained his heart... I probably wouldn't have left the countryside... I'm not blaming him... I'm just saying for different reasons we didn't hit the point I once experienced of orgasm control. It's not a requirement in a relationship. I've had chemistry without it, but when someone brings it up like this morning, even in a playful way and I try forcing it... And then I feel odd rushing feelings I... Just... I don't know. It is a nice reminder of where I can go... The question now is... Who will take me there long term? Now I feel like crying... This is not one of my happy to be unowned days, but I'm glad this is off of my chest.

11/13/2016 6:25:23 PM
This past week, well year actually, I did some standing up for myself. See it's not just the height / weight on the profile, but I guess I finally get that maybe I don't give off the most "adult" persona in tone or appearance (unless I'm upsetor handling business for someone else). In years before I honestly didn't notice much, but I think that has a lot to do with people that weren't offered the right trying to "dom me". I don't mean from this or any site, that part is expected and handled. I mean people would actually make a deep voice and tell me you are going to xyz like I have s type written on my forehead. You'd think being an s type would make me say ok sure... Nope it makes the opposite happen because #1 before this year people weren't that bold #2 when I was owned I was taught to not respond to random commands #3 controlling me is earned not just given out because you are cool with me or have the same blood as I do. They wanna flex I'm going to flex right back. I'm 30 and frankly it's a fact regardless whether I look it or not, sound it or not, or tout it or not. There's good and bad. Some things are a blessing and not so much. Bucking up isn't my favorite thing. It's one of the few self centered advantages of always being with a Daddy / Master. I could be as shy and timid as I wanted even in sketchy places and not have to worry about anything but pleasing one. Didn't have to talk, make eye contact, go very far at all alone. I'm not complaining because in the future when I'm possessed, if I have that type of freedom, yes I said freedom because it is freedom to be myself, I'll appreciate it even more than I did then, if possible. Why did I share this? Because some of you say you enjoy reading about my experiences kink and not so there ya go.

11/13/2016 4:52:40 PM
So I'd like to find an escort (not the pro kind lol) for my gal pals grad party in NY late January. The plan is to stay up there a few days so if you're already near or will be near message me for specifics. (naturally if I'm snatched up by then this is not going to remain because I usually get jealous types lol) I'm posting here because I do wanna enjoy some alternative time while there lol

11/13/2016 12:20:28 PM
https://youtu.be/bnVUHWCynig I'm just hoping for a Halo To others I've been an angel But they always had an angle Couldn't keep it straight so It's cool cause I'll be grateful When the one I guess I'm waiting for Finally walks through the door He'll be crazy but it'll be called for The type I'll cut others off for The one that when we lock eyes it'll look like soft porn He'll hold my hand so tight yall will call it hardcore If we happen to fight he might strangle the girl But you'll see him ask "aren't you my pain whore?" Then he'll probably laugh, let go, and catch me right, before I hit the floor See that's having my back and none of these dudes really have before Others might come but they'll see I've got it all and if I need more Others might cum, but as soon as it falls they know I'm still spoken for When it's the right fit there won't be a stall, just locks on shut doors Is that too much to ask? I'm not quite sure Why a Halo? Cause I need you above me Guide and lead me so I can feel you love me Your warmth from your glow has me feeling darn lucky Your passion in each blow has masochist tears running The loving in it I know I feel it as you comfort me I don't need a hero but Halo that trusts me

11/13/2016 4:44:26 AM
My little friend and I were chatting and I had fallen to sleep. I woke up with a text where she was like he'd never share you... One way it made me angry the other way it turned me on... You never know what someone will or won't share given the right circumstances. I love jealous territorial guys but sometimes life isn't situated to where no sharing is healthy. Sometimes sharing is necessary for both to be happy. Sometimes choking out of jealousy is necessary for both to be happy. And sometimes being untouched is necessary for all to be happy. You gotta do it your way... That pleases everyone involved. Hm Right now sex with cuddles a joint bubblebath and breakfast would be nice I'm in my emo mood and so cuddily Do I wanna be shared? Depends on who you are

11/10/2016 11:52:33 AM
Before you say you don't like games or drama or fakes, try doing a fact check of your own actions, your own life or lives lol, and your own way of treating or mistreating people. The main ones calling people fakes are faking. The main ones not wanting to be left in the cold did it to someone else. Reciprocity is important to me

11/9/2016 5:54:32 PM
If you're into fishing I'm open to whatever tips you have, preferably freshwater. Wish I had a Daddy to "stand behind me helping me to cast" but that could turn naughty... Tying me with 30lb test and cane me with the rod Pierce my nipples with hooks and dangle the bobbers on them... Hmmm ok wait back on topic, so yes fishing tips. I've missed it, glad to be back at it. If I get back to Florida I definitely will bring my fishing equipment that I'm slowly contemplating. So the irritation of the results was brushed off by 13mph Carolina winds, good sun, fresh air, and the pond.

11/8/2016 8:49:41 AM
I want real CUDDLES NOW!!!
gimmie gimmie gimmie!!!!

10/31/2016 8:27:57 AM
No maybehers were harmed during the visit to Florida. I did get to hit the beach and that was great because I didn't go at all last year or this summer. Thank you for your concern, well wishes, and curious inquiries lol. Some of ya'll kinda nosey.

10/26/2016 8:11:40 PM
Yall see my cubs right

10/26/2016 2:58:25 PM
Ok I admit it, maybe my training was screwed up because telling me about gangbangs or dressing me like a slut in the first message makes my stomach turn. It doesn't mean I wouldn't do that stuff if I belonged to the man. I did stuff I didn't always wanna do, because in.the end I wanted to please... It just means... I need my mind to be under control before you mention the body, unless it's a sucking dick lol that's different (I was once at a point where I understood sucking dick was sex... Um shrugs) Well I'm almost packed, hopefully this will be enjoyable. If nothing else I get away from this 50 degree weather for a few days. And the learn the meat jam

10/25/2016 11:11:24 AM
Thanks to those who checked on me. I think I beat the cold just in time for my trip in a few days. If I come up missing after I'm due back one of the people on my friends list did it, so you guys have my back right? Right?? Nah I don't think he'd do anything too crazy to me, but I gotta leave a paper trail, ya dig? I'm hoping Guavaween will be fun, but it's gonna be dark lol yea I know darkness usually happens at night.

10/23/2016 8:43:27 PM
I feel like I'm catching a cold, I have things that need to be done so I don't wanna be all stuffy... I know some don't feel they should take care of their girl when she's sick. Sometimes I don't even feel like it's right, but tonight warm arms, tea, and something to suckle would be nice. I already took a nap and still feel flowwy.. I wan cuddles For the D types asking if I'm a babygirl... It's a tough answer. I don't say I'm a babygirl because that seems general, identifying as a little is easier. I do have a babygirl side that I show if I feel close to the M or D type. I have only shown that side to one person in person and another was able to get to that side, but wasn't ready for me to show it while we were in person... Basically saying that's a very vulnerable state for me to be in, so I'm very careful. Being little is just a part of my personality so it's likely to peak. To me it's separate. Hope that makes sense. Doesn't mean I'm not a s Now can I have my cuddles If I had a Master daddy he would make me get off of here and come to bed....

10/19/2016 6:36:30 PM
If you are chivalrous I doubt I can resist If you have a sense of valour I promise I won't be out there Acting crazy tarnishing your name If I'm serving a true gent, how dare I misbehave? My middle side might get beside me Just give me the daddy eye it'll subtly bound me I promise I'm not perfect but you'll be glad you found me Bad days will be worth it because usually you'll be happy Telling all your friends "her submission surrounds me If this girl located the earth's end she'd go to it to keep me from drowning" My hair in the wind I cry out Your manhood pounds me I'm not against having friends but I'm craving more How's that sound sweet?

10/18/2016 8:39:54 PM
If me being coy is unbecoming I guess we won't be cumming If my shyness isn't what you're loving I guess I'll have you running If you don't like oral before bed I guess there won't be suckling If you'll strangle me for giving head I'll be forgiving your jealousy If my ass is what you like but you won't let me show it If you know how I can fuck all night but wanna beat me cause I just let others know it If you feel my pussy is tight and would love to make it swollen Are you my master? Just a sick bastard? A Daddy looking quite dapper? Or a taken in hand fellow wanting his happily ever after? As I taste royal blue jello maybe it's time we start a new chapter One requirement, I hate to discriminate, but no actors You must be legit and have low dramatic factors I miss spanks on my clit and nipple claspers As I give last drops of cum licks, would you have cuddles waiting after? You might be him Or have you been him before Sometimes you never know sometimes I'm not sure I need the one I'll grow With and be more, than just an outlet And I bet he's somewhere looking for me And hasn't appeared yet About more than being horny Although he'll keep me wet Even if I'm sad he'll try to ease it And if all else fails and I stare at his dick He'll mount me, slide inside, kiss my neck and squeeze my tits Whispering "I wanted to remind you, just incase you thought you might think you'd forget" I'll laugh to myself thinking he's crazy and I love it

10/18/2016 5:59:39 PM
If people would quit dying and getting sick that would really be fine and dandy for a while... Sheesh! I know I know but Sheesh!! If ya got a pair of warm arms could I have them, just for night time I won't even snore. You people who are use to having someone in bed at home waiting are so lucky and ya don't even know it, ya just take it for fricking granted like it's always going to be there, well it might not. Newsflash people die so pay attention to your freaking mate while you still have them and stop being self centered. Who am I fussing at? Whoever the shoe fits

10/18/2016 11:18:57 AM
Date: wife called, they answer, I'm sitting there about to walk away and give space, I feel him grab my hand as I stand, he says "just a moment honey" to her, he looked at me and growled "is there a reason you're leaving me" I sat back down wondering where this was going... he went back to the phone "oh I'm relaxing with insert my name, we just finished dinner" I didn't screw him but myyy does transparency turn me on. No whispers no mutters just flat out and straight up. She asked to speak to me and we made plans to have a nail date the next time he's with his gf. Nope wifey isn't poly he just happens to be upfront with her and she just happens to respect that just like I do. Lol don't get bothered fellas he and I aren't compatible, it's just nice to feel respected as a woman by an in charge type. Plus I like having a man around every now and then without sexual pressures until I have a D type. Hopefully that gives married guys some clarity about me being cool as long as it's evident that wifey knows. I don't just mean you told me she knows I mean me knowing she knows. Now if she's cool with it or not that's between you two. I don't expect every girl to want to hang with me, but knowing is half the battle...

10/16/2016 4:53:08 PM
Seeing people traveling together made me smile, but wish for it. I'm really missing being someone's babygirl today. I had swiss rolls, a lunchable,, coffee, fuzzy socks, an old classic movie... Football... At the end of the day... I want cuddles... I want someone dragging me by the hand around the airport. I know it probably looked awkward when I was that girl lagging behind a mean looking guy like a little puppy, but something just felt warm and fuzzy about it, it felt right. Those warm and fuzzy feelings were long ago, but it's just a yearning day is all. I know the right person(s) for me to follow around are out there, and I'm in no rush to find, but could speed up a bit on finding me lol. No offense, but if for whatever reason I or you feel we aren't compatible that doesn't make what we desire any less authentic than it was before. It makes us mature enough not to waste someone's time especially if we know it won't work. Please refrain from sending me bitter messages, if we aren't compatible I'm really not worth the time it takes to press send. Now how's that for this "ego" some assume I have? Lol I think dude confused ego with understanding of self and standards. Pops collar

10/12/2016 6:12:44 AM
http://www.pornylust.com/video/66583/sara-luvv-fucks-step-dad# Before any thoughts are assumed ddbg and or taboo is about way more than hot sex to me so no need to inform me, I also know they aren't always connected, but for a bit let me have this... Many of you will not find the above arousing, but to me it is the best solely vanilla porn I've ever seen and I'll tell you why... For starters his fricking VOICE!!!!!!! could get a girl to do almost anything. His approach: stern, but so so gentle He uses that voice and knows just what to say She wasn't all super fake She looked freaking like she could be her role I am convinced they had been together before: look at how freaking gentle he was, how she responded to him, how they kissed, how he freaking forced her to let him keep eating her, the way he kept talking as she sucked him, the touches and eye contact, and the positions he kept their bodies touching the whole entire tiiime uffffff This freaking thing was so real for me I didn't cum watching it the first time. I was too busy drooling and wondering when my version of him will appear. It was even hot him saying.... Well nevermind If they had thrown in some bdsm I'd go craaazzzzy He fricking seduced her in a very subtle in charge way,,, girls are always expected to seduce and there's nothing wrong with that but a DD I can be myself with and he encourages me to enjoy the pleasure I give, I'm craving that. Control the mind and the body will follow Lol I'm such a hopeless romantic OK add candles cuddling and a warm bed.

10/11/2016 8:12:40 PM
So the post about the dude in TX is gone because I got sick of it being there and I'm gonna have fun regardless... Plus the poems would vanish if I kept it and posted this so not cool... Well, tonight mi gonna talky abouts missing exes. Rolls around... I don't really think many D types ever genuinely miss an ex. I think they might occasionally get lonely or want sex or miss something that ex did that others didn't but missing what someone did is totally different from missing the person. I know I'll get messages saying I'm wrong, but unless the ex is dead I just don't believe most D types miss them. If I'm wrong shrugs won't be the last time lol. As for s types I think when half of them say they miss their ex they really do. The other half miss the power and controlthe ex had over them and the feelings the ex inspired, but not literally the ex. If you miss your ex, in my opinion it's a good thing. It means the time you spent wasn't a complete and utter waste lol. To me missing doesn't mean you want them back, it means you desire their company in one way or another for a set time or another, and I don't see that as bad or weak. It also doesn't mean anything has changed. I can miss people and know things would actually be worse trying a relationship now than it was back then, so try not being so quick to deny you miss an ex or so ready to assume someone who admits to missing an ex isn't ready to move on. Sometimes people stsy exes for years and realize they are kindred spirits. Others stay exes forever and fuck each other senseless. Others stay exes and just keep swimming. I'm just saying if you miss your ex there's no horrible thing about it. I personally worry more when people deny loving people that they just can't stay away from, emotional masochist much??? Or when people say "no I don't miss my ex at all". Lol missing doesn't mean you still want them lol. I promise NONE of my exes genuinely still want me heck none of them genuinely wanted me to begin with lol, but a few probably think they miss me a Lil. But seriously if you spend 1 plus yrs with someone and don't have good memories that make you smile or moments you want to call, what does that say about the time you spent? I'm just curious...

10/7/2016 9:18:49 AM
In the rain he strokes my mane And whispers to me "you're not the same As you were when I found you You've been hurt but made it through I promised I'd guide you And I did So kneel slut" I already am They not looking but they feel my leash in your hand You took me to a shrink and even they said damn They hadn't a clue of what to recommend I think more of you would be the best medicine You put a brand on me Just cause you got horny If anyone happens to lay a hand on me You'll handle it super cool to naked eyes it'll look boring Naked thighs with deep scratches on them Is entertaining to you You never trained but ooo Taught me exactly how to please and unwaveringly serve who I belong to Lips to pussy it's you I love your pursuit Cause you didn't quit when you got me like those lazy doms do You grabbed me, nurtured and taught me, you made me want to Daddy it's worth it, please stop me if I decide I don't want to Be yours any more Your gentle tone Takes me from a woman scorned to a little girl missing home I'll stay at your feet overjoyed to be owned They think it's overrated to be sweet that's contrary to what you know The way you master me takes sugar, possessiveness, and control That's why I'm so sweet licking the key that you hold Sucking the balls that you know I love Forever is a while but as long as you hover above I'll keep an eternal smile and remain filled with love

10/6/2016 11:42:56 AM
If you've ever stayed in a foreign hostel let me know where and what was it like? Especially if you've been to Ireland, Finland, or Germany... Some people wait forever for someone to travel with rofl aye life is for the living ya dig? I hope everyone is ok with the storm) hurricane and everything. Right now I'm kinda concerned and trying to convince myself i shouldn't be... People have people to be concerned about them so i really should just chill, right? Yea i should... Easier said than done but I was once recently told "being sweet is overrated, accomplishing goals is better" so let me chill... And calm down. It's not my place... If you have a fantasy team make sure you don't have bye week coming l ifso do your changes.

10/3/2016 7:42:53 PM
Take me as your lil girl Wait i already lied Take me as your slut please And when I'm by your side Hold me as your lil girl And when you need a sense of pride You know I'll obey I love it when you say "damn babygirl i love when you suck it that way" I love it even more when you moan out loud Fucking my throat like I'm a whore making me try to wiggle out Of your grasp You smack my ass It's getting hotter now I love what I hate for you Shrugs like the singer lloyd "all i wanna be is tru" No need to have me spoiled unless you want to Aye i love attention Promise no need for suspicion Before I hide a dude I'll petition A release from service cool? Not that I'm planning to Just saying loyalty is deep Whenever you get horny that's how you might take me... Deep Sir I'll cream As soon as you instruct me It's not only the sex But is it bad that I stay wet When I'm owned although I'm grown being treated like I'm not, yet Teddy bears and cute toys being flung off the bed To fuck me They say you're lucky You say they want me I'm not studding Anyone but you Even if i do... I'm a flirt that's how I roll i thought you knew Why you think I'm attracted to jealous possessive dudes? Short leash Makes me leak And maybe just maybe it kinda helps me keep My head right Pussy tight Every time you enter it's like an mma fight Get me down daddy Correct your girl, please strap me Ooooo i promise my focus would be to make you happy Tell those fuckers over there you'll be damned if they have me Then loan me for a week watch them return me in an hour Saying "aye I'm just not ready, that slut only accepts your power Cause I'm not gentle enough to show my inner strength... It's all you man you're all she wants, squirms, and thinks" I'd stand there bashful grin, like what can I say i like them distinct You slap the collar around saying "you'll always belong to me" I'm not quite sure how that sounds, but at the moment I just take a seat With permission of course, set to please a King When you arrive I'll call You gift, but for now I'll call you Dream I've shared enough drag me away Kisses cuddles And Scene

9/30/2016 8:13:59 PM
Shaved pussy, new month clean slate lol. The thing about hanging with nilla men you gotta know what you have a taste for lol. Now I'm just cooling With an odd urge to watch in the heat of the night lmao I need to give a massage, any takers? Lol I want cuddles!! Have you ever slapped a girl for skinny jeans or mini skirts? If you have tell me about it lol Give me a bed time story about it? Rant below lol Only 2 d type men this week have heard my voice with any regularity. I hardly feel that's having lots of guys. If i had as many men as some assume i do I'd be taken right now, don't ya think? Maybe it's my approach so allow me to explain... With 3 men in the past as soon as I became interested I shut down communication with other men, totally. One of those men is still cool with me. The other two, well they're scorpios enough said. Point is: it hasn't EVER been advantageous for me to focus on men the way I did, besides the fact that they can say (if they feel like being honest) that they had my total focus. So now when someone is of interest to me (which is rare), I don't focus solely on them, I get to know them but they share my attention with whoever else just like I share theirs. It's a good way for no one to waste time or get prematurely attached. It doesn't mean I'm screwing anyone, just means I'm talking and getting to know different people at one time. If someone's actions show they are ready for something serious that's different. If someone's jealousy shuts the rest down that's different too, lol but that's only happened twice. I say all that to say, an M type friend seems to think i have men all over the country lmao but besides him and the one of the three men, no doms have heard my voice this week. Last week another one of the three heard my voice... So there you have it. As for my vanilla dating, that's a bit different, but I'm not dating anyone right now. That is why I don't like d types alluding to me "having" men everywhere because #1 it's simply not true #2 if i did i would be taken and serving in one of those places on a night like this #3 two out of the three were jealous to the point where even the fact that this friend thinks I have men all over the country would get me snatched up, heck one probably wouldn't even let me talk to the M type because i kinda think his voice is sexy... So now that we have cleared up... Btw unless I've been your babygirl before or you've had your wiggle in my cookie or i suddenly ask to call you daddy please don't call me babygirl strangers it creeps out my little side Stomps away

9/30/2016 4:01:17 PM
Sometimes there's stuff i wanna share but i dont want anyone thinking it's ok to suddenly do it, just because I share it.. Lol ufff Don't ask me why I like jealous or possessive types, just see it as a fact because I'll get all hot and bothered thinking of stuff that's happened that probably isn't even safe to share. FUCK! I'm aroused now. It's Friday... Ponders if i should fix it. I'm gonna cry I know I'm a lil fucked up in the head, but aren't we all? Stomps away

9/30/2016 11:40:08 AM
Looking at pics from the Daddy littles convention in Cali, a d type friend of mine is keeping me updated on what's going on so that's pretty cool. I don't even want the "if i was your daddy" messages lol. I've never in my whole life taken an actual couples getaway with a man before so ya I'm not a fan of ifs. One day when it's my turn to have a daddy who has my back and wants to do stuff like that with Me, I'll be there! Until then you better have a blast sleppyhead

9/29/2016 6:42:23 AM
Chill day today ooo... Wish it was a day to play... I feel like I have tense parts that only a gentle sadist could heal. If it hurts when you do kegels i think the pelvic floor muscles are "snug" enough. Right now i wonder how I'd sound with a nice, warm, not too thick, not too thin, manhood, thrusting into me. I love hanging on tight. Letting the energy flow. With one D type i actually cry cause it feels so good or hurts so bad, been too long, gotta rectify that. I'm forsaking some good pleasure for what exactly? Wanna grab me and show me how strong you are? Wanna hear me moan daddy or Master in your ear as i try fucking you back If i wasn't so picky... Well we shall see, but if you have any sense of romance and sadism we might enjoy each Other. Another side of me wishes i had someone making sure I don't get naughty with anyone but them. Lol owned vs free vs poly with a selfish guy to own me and a sexy relaxed guy or two to date. A girl can dream right? I need to suck a pretty penis until all the above is sorted out lol. And don't come in my pm telling me anything about your dick if you aren't close by. Mmmmm my middle side is waking up and she wants to suck! Ufff I think it can make the pain go and change my mood.

9/28/2016 7:38:06 PM
Lol @ nilla trucker telling me to wake him for breakfast sigh he doesn't know me very well the phone will be blaring at 5 am like "top of the morning to ya" Sigh Le me lone when you're sad anything can amuse you. Going to head to bed and see if what one asks for is really what they seek. And I WANT CUDDLES!!! But me no have any

9/28/2016 9:46:45 AM
I received a card... Offering condolences... I've lost people before and never had thAt before. I'm not big on cards, but it was special. Even though she's far away now she's still a great friend and Domme. I'm trying to get back to sleeping better, but I've been off. I think I'll add back a vitamin i was taking. With it being fall i have to get back in the habit of domming myself no matter how bad I rather not. Self discipline is good. Sex thoughts have finally calmed down on my mind, but love making on the other hand would be nice on these rainy nights. I still do have the feeling I'll belong to a good D type soon and then pieces of positive sexual energy can release, So many don't get how i go from being totally turned off by any sexual question to being turned on just by the man's attention. Mmmmm I'm soooo ready. Is it about sex? Nope all the other stuff glides, then i think on sex mmmmm... Can't wait to moan out for him after cleaning his place, to shiver from walking around in very little, to sit on his lap as he fingers the pussy he'll call his. To hand him a drink as he reads something and get om all fours to be his footstool. Mmmmm I'm so freaking excited. To iron for him and get a playful swat. To get dressed in a naughty way because he feels it's hot. To see him display glimmers of jealousy, not like many of you think. It will stem from possession, not insecurity. Mmmmm for him to find spots and tricks that make my mind putty lol. For me to find new ways to please and tremble with shyness and him to whisper what I've only heard a few times encouraging me to bask in it. Swoon... Soon... I can feel it

9/25/2016 10:38:35 AM
I know it might not get better with everything happening in the world. I know family members die it's just life and they aren't coming back but I really wish everything would just be good for a while. People keep saying I need a vacation, well Maybe I should take one. Nillas don't realize flying to meet potentials isn't usually a vacation for me it's actually kinda stressful. That's y i was excited about Houston i thought I was meeting a friend. Right now I can't imagine this world lacking another person who loved me. Now from that generation i have no one left. If you have loved ones in their 80's and 90's cherish them, call them, ask them about old times, don't wait. I just wanna make a blanket fort and hide. The bright side: a good daddy friend of mine found his babygirl / sub i hope this one is the right one but I doubt it. I told him what type of girl I feel he'll be with, I give it a yr or two and he'll realize I'm correct, and nope it's not me lol. I do miss safe arms and the two sets of arms belonging to Masters i felt physically safe with aren't accessible for various Reasons. Doesn't matter anyway because if they were all I'd do is cry. Sigh I'm gonna go hide. Keep me updated on events in NC GA FLA and H town.

9/24/2016 10:11:36 PM
Did anybody else see the bodypaint??

9/23/2016 6:39:05 PM
Grab my hand Or my neck Wander your fingers Am i wet? Taste my nipples Taste my lips Caress me be gentle Let me taste your dick Please Lower me To my knees I won't tease If i do you'll like it Teach me how to ride it Mmmmm i feel it Ooo you do it He grabs my throat and growls "if you're mine slut prove it" My nails scratch His back I moan I throw it back Rolling my hips Mmmm just like that Bounce and shake Tighten my thighs Oh yessss He slows I know He's going to Release

9/23/2016 1:16:45 PM
Itinerary and curious NC Any munch groups in Winston NC? For the weekend or week ahead? TEXAS Any chocolate or Latino Doms or Dommes in Houston that can host for 10/8 - 10/12? really don't wanna waste this flight i don't mind if you have a girl I might actually prefer she's around to keep me company. if she's drama free. I thought of getting a hotel but the guy who cancelled was supposed to cover it and I'm not dishing out extra to sit in a room alone. So i don't know. FLORIDA Any dungeons in Tampa or st Pete with events in late October or November? I have an open roundtrip arrangements and a friend or two in the area so you don't have to babysit me lol unless you wanna, just looking for the hot spots. My ticket doesn't expire until May 2017 but i really wanna use it to enjoy the heat in the winter months. GEORGIA Also I might be in atl the 22nd - 25th of November i know it's the holidays but I'm only going if there's a meet or two for me to enjoy (no race preference for Florida or Georgia) And as for the other trip... Who knows... I feel so iffy about it. I'm tired of the same games / hypocrisy.

9/17/2016 10:16:07 PM
:-) sweet dreams guys and girls I'll close this off for a while with a question from a Virgo musician... He asked: are you even ready for a relationship? If the right connection comes, I won't fight it. In a way I feel I've been ready, a long time. Then again nothing says a person has to be ready, but i also know the pain of someone not being ready for you. Some ask if I'm even ready because I'm not missing them after two days of talking or I'm not responding to them saying my name with a little base in their voice... Shrugs They aren't asking their selves "am i ready for her to cry like crazy when she leaves? am I ready for her to not be able to really sleep without my body touching next to her? Am I ready to be her protector even when she doesn't feel she needs it? Am I ready for all her unleashed sexual energy that only comes out when she really feels connected to someone almost to the point of feeling she wants sex most or she's always on edge?" I'm not flipping it intentionally, i just don't think they're asking the same question... He asked a good question

9/17/2016 7:36:49 PM
Why do I need love in M/s?
I'm starting to think it's hard to get me to love someone so maybe I don't need love in M/s but I wan it because it feels so fucking good.
When I am in love with a man and he slaps me I feel it throughout my whole fucking body.
When I am in love with a man and he slides inside of me I feel it years later until someone just as good if not better comes behind.
When I am in love with a man and he does dumb stuff (yes d types do stupid immature juvenile things sometimes or lots of times) but when I am in love with a man I am not so irritated by it days later. I'm rolling my eyes not requesting release.
Without me being in love there's no purity in the passion or drive behind what I do.
If I'm not in love with you and we do naughty things (I probably shouldn't share this but I'm in a blunt mood) most likely there's probably some thing or someone else on my mind.
WOW... I just realized it... The being in love while being M/s is so deep for me because (when there's no drama with it) it's freedom... I knew being owned felt free.... But I didn't think of how free and airy and light my mind feels when I am in love with a Master (without drama). I think back to that and wow. It's a beautiful thing.

That ladies and gentlemen and assholes, is what keeps me hopeful.

9/17/2016 6:26:00 PM
If you're a disciplinarian crossed with humanitarian let's rock!
If you can motivate me while I serve let's see.
If you can care about my goals while I make your goals mine let's see.
If you will be strong enough to have my back and be my white knight even though I can hold my own and not punish me or leave me hanging in the wind because of that ability, hell just drag me down the aisle by leash. I have never ever had a man come to my defense or stand up for me, and honestly I don't really get into crap making it necessary but still it would be nice to know someone is loyal enough to have my back.
I've had and seen men rescue others and even stand against me at the defense of other women who have royally screwed them. It's not fair to them but it's their choice. It's not fair to me, so I seek something more.
So if that might be you... STEP UP! Because I definitely give more than I get, and maybe it's finally time for that to change.

Note: i didn't say motivate me to serve I said motivate me while I do it... That means in life or in bed... You moaning while I suck you could be motivation lol. You pushing me to get stuff done could be motivation... So for those confused there's the clarity

9/17/2016 10:10:01 AM
so a hot d type on here wants to know "do you ever do as you are told"
simple answer: of course
extra: if i belong to the person... If I don't then I do what i feel like lol

9/16/2016 9:30:23 PM
So this dude (don't know him at All) sends this "go to the corner and turn you ass to ME and wiggle it until you are wet and sloppy, then lay flat on the floor and crawl to MY feet, dragging your nipples across the rough floor and leaving a trail from your cunt all the way to ME, and beg for ME to use and abuse you ! ! !" I get we s types get those type messages, meant to f our heads up. Welp in a way he kinda succeeded because as I read it, it was like i saw visions of the stuff in the message happening from back when I was owned. I mean it was way different than the message more intense, more spontaneous, more real lol.... But sigh ufff dude you suck royally for that one. Otherwise my night was alright If you're into fantasy Scifi kinda minotaur came on lol and I was social i guess but what i really wanted was to be... idk

9/16/2016 6:38:18 PM
The whole "littlespace" thing... I get it's a bite off of subspace and i should be focused on fun right now not lifestyle but I'm not in a nilla mood... So i guess littlespace is supposed to be when you feel little but i think people try too hard to get "into" it. Just be little when you can and enjoy it. You don't have to have a big ritual for it. Especially if you have a Daddy Dom or a Master who let's you be yourself and embraces that part of you... Just follow his mood and make it happen. Let it flow and the little in you will come out naturally. Try not forcing it. No need to search for a little: age, voice, or space. If you welcome it, it will come. Hops off of soapbox and begs for a piggyback ride.

9/16/2016 6:18:08 PM
Only a d type would want to hurt you and slap you for trying to suggest a job lead for a chick who likes him. Smh it's not my fault she won't stop bothering him now

9/16/2016 12:37:45 PM
More and more i want to post pussy pics... The craving was haulted by having a jealous associate to send them to but as usual I knew it wasn't going to be longevity even though he claimed to want it... I really want to share them... But something in me won't let me. I like being a Master's little treasure but i kinda ask myself if it's just from the short leash in the past? Maybe... If it is, is that good or bad? Even though I leaned back on the associate Maybe I can still send the pics just because i want him to have them? But is that teasing? Maybe he doesn't mind being teased? Why can't I just send to another guy friend? Every man especially D types don't necessarily know how to appreciate pics without being greedy or critical. He does get greedy but not in the beggy way and I think us meeting before makes it seem "real" for me. Why him? This isn't me gushing over some guy because like a few that proceeded he had a chance to have me and passed it up in typical fashion of his sign, but he's the only man lifestyle or not who I'm totally sure loves my body and if he doesn't he fakes it so well i don't even mind. Even in person the way he held my wrists, the way he gently grabbed my waist, the way he talked about my ass cheeks, legs, and nipples, the dude even likes my hair lol i don't even like my hair sometimes. I shaved my pussy a new way and it just happened to be the way he likes so I've been maintaining it that way. Not because of anything other than I'm not taken and it's nice to be adored. Is it ego? Nah but if you knew me you'd understand how calming it is to have someone physically drawn to you not for sex or because their main person won't do what you will, but simply because they are drawn to you. For me it's rare. I think it's one reason I saw possibility back then. I mean do you know how well i could focus on serving without freaking about my physical appearance or being chastised for it? I was like i could serve the heck out of this dude... But again it was passed on, not by his words but action. So back to pics... I think I'll do a set and send... If he's cool with it great if not I'm sorry cs you may get your eyes assaulted in the near future. The only thing he doesn't like is the body mod but if we got together i would have haulted that.

9/16/2016 10:01:26 AM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4_TyO0PEwpo
minus the crib my middle side is all over this throw back song
if u don't like pop / r&b don't click lol

9/16/2016 9:56:51 AM
Singing this song with my pal lol he's all dang girl you sing it like you got feelings behind it lol
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5nZueSZRJrA

9/15/2016 8:37:18 PM
One day I heard a guy yell out "im not going to let you fuck me up the ass" it was soooo funny to me back then because it was basically him putting his foot down in a unique way... Nowadays especially lifestyle i hear of things and I'm thinking don't let her f you up the ass. Smh

9/14/2016 6:17:01 AM
Bounces on the bed Bouncy bouncy bouncy boucy bounce Mi wan b plaaaayfuuulssss Not in d naughty way Grrrrr Lions I'm a tiger Gimmie a bear then we all be super happies So i wan go for walk Then wash car or twuck Then eat breakfastest Then then then um.... Clean up the house The give cuddles and do work Then um... Blow job yea yea Then more cuddles Then be efficient and get shit oops wait don't hit me i mean get stuffs accomplished Then sex in the shower Wiff cookies hot cooking after And then spanks on the porch Then go night night Wiff suckle Yaaaaay See me just planned out day Now only pwoblem is Where's mi daaaaaddyyyyyy

9/13/2016 4:57:20 PM
YaaaaaY

9/13/2016 1:09:42 PM
If a door closes in your face, turn, there will be a lovely hallway, that will lead to an elevator with amazing music, and take you higher than you ever dreamt of - maybeher

9/13/2016 8:45:18 AM
I'm wondering if I'll ever be the way I was or if how i am depends on the person I'm with. I'm glad I'm no longer shy to the point of being numb almost but i also enjoy knowing if i dont want to speak i don't have to. I wonder if whoever i end up with will get a slave who isn't shy but outgoing. Who isn't coy but blunt. I fluctuate and in some situations i compensate. As my tea brews i ponder. The feeling I mentioned in a past writing that i will be taken soon still lingers. I just don't know the who or when. Thinking of how things will be gives me shivers of excitement and nervousness. By the way, I went to a cafe for the first time in nc lol it was pretty fun. I sat at the table as my feet dangled i giggled quietly thinking this carpet should rise a bit so my heels touch it lol

9/12/2016 8:02:38 PM
CUDDLES!!!!

9/12/2016 7:34:14 AM
Take the worry away Whisper "sweetheart, it's ok" Caress my hair gently, by my side music plays I need you Call me your silly girl Tickle me for no reason Beat me for whatever Share holiday seasons. Tell me I'm yours Because of how i make you feel. Tell me i can take more Just because it's real Force me to do nothing Inspire me to do all Let me know I'm capable But you'll catch me if I fall

9/11/2016 9:37:37 AM
Happiness is infections Gives everyone bunches of hugs

9/10/2016 4:06:14 PM
Deep voices / Clothing choices / Teaching me what that toy is / Making me more productive / Helping me see what giving fucks is / Being an addition to my purpose / I have goals and some are coming to fruition / But the right dom holds my leash, and shows my position / His control shines, encouraging me to extend submission / With positivity / Our authenticity / Keeps negativity / From our vicinity / He'll bring out the very best and pour it into me / While I do the same / He'll see it's not a game / Teaching me how to offer blind trust once again / Saying "babygirl I'm around glad you're not focused on them. / Let's go, rock the town, meet the fam thanksgivin'" / To me that really sounds like a life I could live in / With a Master like that around I'd be set for live-in / Do what he needs done / Heck I'm good without procreation but if he wants I'll have his son / No antagonistic conversations only goal focused ones / He'll see daily i learned patience before he popped up / And for our relationship's duration I'll remain in his clutch / No drama filled situations because he was clear from jump / If he feels like he's poly and others are what he wants / Aye I'm down for the cause duck duck sub hunt / If he only wants me, I don't believe in marriage but he can ring me up / It's not hypocrisy / It's just simple to me / If he's right and fulfills my needs Sir fuck my wants / If I'm focused and aim to please what reason would he give up / Every night end on my knees and as I look up / A tear drops and I'll be thankful that the right M popped up

9/10/2016 12:53:00 PM
To the D or M types that pop by... Sunny Daze On a sunny day Let's swim together On a sunny day No cum is better On a sunny day You get me wetter And wetter Than ever I caress your jewels In the swimming pool You lower my head Using it as a tool Later back in bed you teach me to drool Or not Cause you To feel hot And bothered My aim To offer No pain Your pleasure To cane My pussy just came Or didn't For you All simply To prove My focus If you want it On you I do

9/4/2016 6:50:33 PM
With different people you deal with different things. A guy has been trying to show interest in me back when I was off & on a few yrs ago... So a week or two ago (give or take). I finally get tired of him "talking" about visiting me so i spot a nicely priced flight and offer to see him... He starts talking to me way less after i book it, even though he said weeks before that he realizes the other guys i have interest in pay more attention to me so that's why I don't take him seriously. I'm like fine i don't mention him not talking and only texting occasionally because well as he said I know a d type I'm cool with who stays in contact so there really wasn't a "void". Something on his end comes up, I'm like cool, do you need to cancel? But he said no... Suddenly now he needs to. Am I mad? No But this guy spent yrs talking about a chance. Talking about my ex doing this and that when he did one huge similar thing. Talking about he wanted me to not think about that one old thing and a have a new "chance". Talking about being jealous about me going out with guys or having interests. Talking about if you were mine or if you were here... ??? I'm not going to be committed in a ldr based on ifs if we've never met! If you don't call If you aren't attentive If i don't sense natural dominance Why visit you might ask? Because I get flack for being selective, not giving chances, or looking for perfection. Even the guy who I mentioned gives me attention said he use to feel i wanted perfection. So now I try harder with people sometimes. Especially since he did step away a day at work to call and make sure I was ok during a subdrop and breakup... But that was years ago This is now. He wanted in a sense a "do over" Welp this is what he does with a do over He was doing better before the do over dude lol And to top it all off he makes a profile on this site the other day lol Lmao yea ok whatever

9/3/2016 10:01:54 PM
One part of me feels it's not appropriate to give something special to someone who doesn't possess me. The other side feels it's inappropriate to keep something for someone who doesn't possess me. The decision is really getting close to choice time. If loyalty doesn't matter is it really an issue? Nope

9/1/2016 6:25:48 PM
my first rope redness mmmmm... Sucks that I gave it to myself lol but it felt kinda good and Idk why my nipples are tender now giggles?I got lightheaded and everything. The work wasn't perfect but it's been a while... About to send it to my pal and if they like I'll probably add it to my profile here. It still feels like the ropes are tight around me... Like a dick after you haven't had sex in a while, you still feel it inside... Okay, I think I'm horny now. Goes to get water... If I put it up should it be the default or just in my pics? It's only on the tits lol

9/1/2016 4:20:51 PM
Are ya'll ready for some football? Real and fantasy? If you haven't drafted go ahead and do what ya gotta do!

9/1/2016 9:23:00 AM
Why date vanillas if you're a slave?
Well I'm free and it's occasionally fun
The main reason is D types I click with often aren't local... aren't ever in my state lol and honestly holding out a month or a few weeks for a meet while they do whatever really isn't my style while unowned... Neither is waiting however long for another visit *shrugs*. Neither is randomly moving for a D I don't know.
I also like to not lose sight of the fact that many lifestylers thought they were vanilla when they started out. I've run into a few so called vanillas who actually were dominant, which brings me to my next reason, doms that think they're vanilla lack the arrogance many "lifestyle doms" have. They don't come out of the gate expecting naughty play in text, phone, or in person, expecting sex eh most guys expect or want that the first meet that's a whole different can of cocks, but doms who don't know they're doms are a lot more relaxed when getting to know me and see me as a person instead of assuming or coming off as entitled. So the man I serve forever may very well come from a vanilla meet. I wouldn't be so.... I just wouldn't say "I won't date vanillas" because really what is vanilla? Are we talking sex? Habits? Lacking guts? or just lacking flavor? Because a "vanilla" associate of mine ufff me and these scorpios made the point while picking on me for not liking plain coffee "that's what I got you for, to add flava while I can sip regular" lol eh speaking of him I think he's a tad annoyed I didn't call him yesterday, it's not my fault he claimed he wasn't that type... I guess time will tell and yep he's vanilla supposedly too... I give it well heck the dom side twinkled at me first conversation

8/31/2016 8:55:16 PM
Omgosh Ok like seriously guys! If you're going to have your default as a cock shot pleeeease make it look attractive pick a sexy angle and all that, please? I won't say what i just saw but... No just no If it's in your pics that's one thing but default i don't even get a choice ufff

8/31/2016 8:26:17 PM
Lol my dom associate picks on me because I need alone time after being around most "dates or meets" for a few hours. But i promise it's not always the case lol

8/31/2016 3:07:12 PM
Jamming to funkadelic lol so who's my dawg? Lol

8/31/2016 2:18:59 PM
A trucker in TX was rescued he lost a leg but kept his life he didn't slam on the brakes which probably saved lives. Be careful out there guys. I

8/31/2016 12:43:28 PM
The mod is going well, if I'm snatched up it's reversible so no worries. Profile pics are from January and April of this yr so the mod isn't visible, i think I'll keep it to people online I'm close to and those who see me in RL. Hey, I know we s types can occasionally be tough on D types or M's but i want those sending positive messages to know it's appreciated. I also want those D and M types who have become friends or associates of mine i do not take you for granted. s types there are some genuine d types on here. Perfect, no, do they have faults? We all do, but if you're looking for perfection you won't even find that in your mirror.

8/31/2016 3:13:49 AM
Only squeeze, hm? randomly up and that was the first message i read, thx NZ lol

8/29/2016 11:16:55 PM
If any d types are in Florida check the profile and see if we'll click because I have free flight that way, haven't used it yet. I'll likely be traveling to other areas the month of October, but late September or early November are fine. I've been to Florida numerous times and never hit the beach or laid in the sun, totally hoping to make that happen before the year is over, but it would be more fun to do it with someone, stress free and drama free at least during the time we're together is a requirement thanks. Message me if interested.

8/29/2016 6:28:35 PM
Right now I'm craving a lil pain (this is rare for me while being Unowned) i don't think it's ever been a craving without love and ownership behind it. I wish I wasn't so picky cause I'd fulfill this hunger with a 20 something caramel sadist about an hr away, but if i did, it would mean nothing and afterward I'd never wanna see him again, and using people is not me... So i chill and text and eat Italian ice...

8/26/2016 9:45:02 PM
I will try to not poof posts i make so when I get odd messages like the one below you guys will know what is being referenced and still realize how odd it is lol good night. See now she's got me thinking of when i would hear him say "slut you better not fucking cum" and how he'd grab my neck or bite my buttom lip when i couldn't hold back any longer. Ahhhh let me stop before you guys start thinking im tripping lol Ok so my friend just informed me i am tripping fine be that way! Why i gotta be tripping? *walks out loudly*

8/26/2016 9:10:25 PM
Someone wrote me and said... "I'm not trying to be rude," if you must begin with defending yourself you probably shouldn't send the message lol "but apologies in adavnce:" if you have to apologize in advance you probably shouldn't continue lmao "this will sound rude." didn't to me it sounded like an opinion based on... Probably my writing about why a dom wants to control a girl from being sexual if she isn't his yet lol she probably failed to notice the joys in express below of orgasm control "Are you looking for a dominant or someone to fuck you on pornhub?" not sure about pornhub but clearly she is lol "I could help with either....." um is she offering to be a matchmaker now?? "Being a slave means giving up your sexulaity to another completely." does it now? Well to me being a slave means much more "Meaning no sex, no cum, no ogasm at all unless giving with permission for the pleasure of another." aye I'll message you my formers screen name and you can ask him the pleasure i got from serving lol. I got pleasure from massaging his body, hanging his clothes, taking his pain, learning his ways, and making memories and um he didn't say permission to have pleasure lol. "I don't think, from your writing, you can or want to do that." thanks for your thoughts lol all they are, are thoughts. My writings are my thoughts this email your wrote are yours... Thanks i guess lol I'm not sure how i rubbed her wrong but I'm sending out positive vibes and hopes that she and her partner find who they seek.

8/25/2016 7:02:36 PM
Sweet kisses people don't say I never write for you all. Be back another time...

8/25/2016 5:34:46 PM
Do you have yourself My mentor would say I've got nobody in this life we live this way So i cling to me I see the things I see No one in the end at midnight holding me Cradling me in arms saying this is where you should be In all genuineness it doesn't get lonely I've got memories Maybe a few suitors But i do get sick of being free Waiting for one or two provers To possess me Aye I'm a sharp shooter Blindfold me then call me cupid but i hope I'm cuter Just hold me sick of exchanges over computers I told me, love will come later or sooner

8/25/2016 5:06:53 PM
I will Obey If you Can say I'm needed You'll be greeted With all of me If you mean it I yearn To be loved You yearn To be served You yearn for my trust I yearn for you to hurt My body Make it yours Your passion traces my conture You're asking me for My existence to be yours If i agreed I'd need To believe My sweet Heart Is safe In yours

8/25/2016 12:49:57 PM
D types be honest what do you think of a girl on here with pussy pics? I mean besides it opening her up to raw rude comments. What do you think? I'm not saying I'm going to do it... If i do i already know I'm risking 1 curse out, and one attitude, but shrugs I'm not owned... So tell me what you think of a girl when you see it? I'm sorry if you're a guy with cock pics your opinion is null one thing I love about being unowned is the freedom from double standards lol The no's win... Thank You Doms for the assistance and taking the time to answer.

8/23/2016 6:59:17 PM
Eye roll, i was talking to a D type and he was talking about me visiting and he said just come but for a sec i heard "cum"... That emphasis on cum and the silence that followed took my mind somewhere it hadn't been in a while... Ufff orgasm control. It took my mind a minute after my clit jumped to realize it wasn't a command. I realized how fast I use to respond to that from another source and laughed out of nervousness... What do you know about orgasm control he asked... Yea well... I didn't cum I caught myself. My mind was like close but no cigar, my body was like aye sorry I thought I knew what i heard... Lol I really need to stop messing with scorpio D types... I went out last night and he's like who were you with... I think we spend a lot of time reminding each other of our former loves... But I'm me and he knows that and he's him and I know that... But ya can't expect me to spend yrs serving someone similar and not be reminded. I can't expect him to not see his ex in me either. I think we both know we can't make anything longevity happen... But i think we also know going in and out of lives doesn't help. I've never dealt with him while talking to the ex, if you understand signs just a little it's easy to know why a naturally submissive pisces couldn't have more than one scorpio or leo in her life at a time unless she's got a death wish... Scorpios don't like to share and i dont just mean sexually i mean they don't like sharing your attention, passion, loyalty, at least the ones I attract. It makes them terrific matches for me as Masters. I swear in the past it's like one disappears the other appears one disappears the other appears. The babygirl in me takes it super hard because they're both the only ones to connect that deeply with me but in different ways. I'm not expecting any reappearing, but i do expect this one to disappear again even though he's trying to show he won't. He's had chances to snatch me up and show dominance and didn't until now when I'm totally emotionally guarded right now with him... They say the same thing "you bring this side out in me" it would be an ego stroke but instead it means nothing because at the end of the day... This one belongs to his first passion and location, and the other belongs to obligations. That means... In the end, I'm still left searching for where I belong. Which leaves me, dating or hanging out, which takes us back to "who were you with" sigh Bittersweet

8/23/2016 6:28:25 PM
So for the 3rd time in a week i was told "you can be really confusing sometimes" i had a surprising phone call from an ex who has known me since 19, so I asked him... He basically said no but it's the rest of us that are jacked up and jaded... Mind you this is the same man who told me to my face i was the most unattractive woman he's ever dealt with and he wasn't mad when he said it lol so my point is he wouldn't say it to rub my ego... Here's the thing... People who have had me don't see me as confusing... Weird, i can take that, complex, i embrace that, bitchy, i know i can be sometimes, but confusing... Telling me that is like saying maybeher you are DEFINITELY not her. In other news I'm about to give my "little" the boot... My emotional babygirl side will always be there if she's brought out but the whole craving and falling for D types too far to hold me is getting old. Getting fussed at for dating in real time by d types who i know care or are selfish but don't show they wanna possess me is getting old too. Sigh it's been a kinda interesting summer but it's time to settle down.

8/19/2016 10:19:02 PM
To some love is a word, to others like me it's an action, a feeling, and a state of being. Don't tell me you do if you don't show It, it's been done too Much.

8/18/2016 6:25:40 PM
Why am I so bad? Cause I'm not yet motivated to be good But when i am... Oh when... I... Am... Ask about me *pops collar* Dang i guess I'm picky cause only like 3 you can ask lol Sometimes i try explaining how i think when owned, then I'm like nah you just gotta be there for it.

8/18/2016 4:23:06 PM
It's a rest day from working out... The mods are quite pleasing to me and a few dom friends lol. It was a tough day and I failed to feel a connection to anyone. As for Classes, they're asking for info they already friggin have which is slightly irritating... Between finding out stuff about an associate and losing and then finding my purse, it was a long day. I know who I needed... Or what i needed... But that doesn't matter, so i just gotta stay focused... I want to go away the weekend, but if i go it's gonna be super ignorant because it'll be with someone i totally don't trust to keep me safe. Why? Because i don't trust much of anyone lately... Ufffffff I really really am staying positive, but some time away from daily life is about to help.

8/17/2016 12:13:09 AM
Soo someone said they'll train me? Been done Modify me: been done and I wasn't even his and being done again I'm not this guys either but these mods aren't permanent although I do have a mod that might be permanent unintentionally of course and I was his lol. Change my behavior: been done Take me from normal life: yep had that done too... I'm not bragging... Because obviously I'm still unowned so nothing to brag about... But why tell me what you can do like a car salesman without knowing if it's been done or if it even needs to be done. Those who did any of the above didn't get close to me by saying what they'd do, they just gradually did it. Example: i was trained by a man who says he doesn't train My babygirl was reached by Masters who denied being daddies I was penetrated by men who say they use women for sex.... I was used lol but not for sex in my opinion lol See the pattern here? I'm all for transparency, but know the need before trying to fill it.

8/16/2016 11:14:53 PM
Telling me what a normal day would include when u don't know me... Ha!

8/16/2016 9:58:01 PM
I guess the stretch needs to be broken and soon i guess it will be... This time it's longer than the last, which means... Well nevermind, it's not everyone's business what it means. I'm a tad nervous, a tad excited, and the babygirl inside is probably like you really shouldn't, just give it time lol. I don't know... It's not that serious right? I can't tell you how many times I've heard a D type say it's just sex or its because they were accessible... I guess either i am supposed to believe that or they're crazy enough to think i do. But i guess... Sometimes sex gives a girl the burst of confidence she was missing or relieves stress. I believe that

8/16/2016 9:21:27 PM
Been messaging this sub all night I'm no Domme but the attention isn't bad until I'm snatched up. Some doms don't seem to want their girl to care the sub might appreciate it i guess Sigh im all that over the place

8/16/2016 1:32:28 PM
Guys if you're sending your girl to pursue me, yall need some yrs together. Many lifestyle relationships fail or go off on in the first year. I'm not looking for that drama. Plus I've already had doms show they weren't able to be fully in charge of their lives so a girl coming up for you basically proves it...

8/14/2016 5:35:55 PM
So today I was dressed... It's been a LONG time since someone had a hand in picking out my outfit. I felt a tad guilty, because i slightly still have a sense of loyalty in undue areas, i digress. Something about it also felt calming... Organic... Genuine... It happened naturally, not the usual bull speech I'll control what you wear, blah blah blah... It's like you're a M type so I'm not surprised... It didn't go like that at all. There's something about my pisces soul even being slightly controlled by a scorpio (even though they do grimey knuckleheaded stuff) something about their control makes me swoon. It felt good... Just that little reminder of how calming life was when I was owned... Made me crave it even more. In other news, I bought condoms lol...

8/12/2016 11:08:06 PM
Girls, be careful about when and how you go about body mods... Make sure it's for someone you've been with a while, or for yourself, or something you can reverse easily. I am not sure how i feel... Earlier i didn't feel well and I just kept saying "i want my _____." then it was like yea that's not possible. Lol I feel a bit better, turns out I just simply didn't eat enough. I find body decisions difficult being unowned, because different people like different things. I'm pretty poly for a girl, but when it comes to that, having only one person is a bit easier. I guess I'm going to bed. Cha cha cha changes

8/12/2016 10:18:13 AM
I wanna buy lingerie but somebody is being a meanie head! Granted i still have stuff i haven't worn yet, but what does that have to do with anything? I started to play the not yours card, but I'm feeling a tad submissive to people I've met in real time (for today) so fine! Be mean *Stomps away*

8/10/2016 3:28:32 AM
It's Wednesday I've been up 2 hrs...

8/8/2016 8:54:15 AM
If you're contradicting yourself please don't blame lil ol?e lol If you say you want something in particular or a certain type your profile should convey that lol.

8/7/2016 6:01:54 AM
I want my...... Daaaaaaddyyyyyyy Sigh what i hate about french kissing people i don't belong to? I feel like they got icky germs... What i hate about people i don't belong to playing with my body? They don't know the sensitivities. I just feel better when I'm possessed at least when it comes to physical stuff. Where is my Daddy? I've only cuddled two people and felt totally comfy and connected. One is a tad too sadistic and won't give me stability. Why am I gonna go see him? Idk The other wouldn't be transparent and rather hurt me than love me, and wouldn't give me stability. Why do I still miss his control and our chemistry? Cause it was friggin unprecedented. Why the heck were they both the same sign? Who knows lol What am I gonna do? Continue this dating stuff and mingling with potentials... Maybe one day stability will be offered by a good cuddler and controlling force of passion with a hint of jealousy. Sigh

8/5/2016 7:45:41 PM
Who do I belong to?

8/5/2016 7:43:09 PM
I no like being daddyless in football season... Ufff I no like being masterless in spring I no like being single in winter In summer... Don't judge me lol

8/5/2016 4:11:18 PM
Sometimes men act like I'm speaking another language. Why is it so easy to ignore what i clearly express. Ufff...

8/4/2016 8:32:43 AM
This year has been the first year in a long time my little side has mostly been kept under wraps. I got to be expressive that way one night in January, but that was mostly it... I want the rest of the year to have the right man or men for me to show my little side to naturally. I was told I can show it when i visit an associate, but i think many d types see it as "play" which brings in complexity because if you "play" with my little side then i won't naturally let it flow I'll just show it when I'm horny lol which isn't my desire.... If people would just let it flow and not Call it out or trying figuring it out, that would help. The D doesn't have to deal with my little mode. How does that work? Acknowledge it and just let me be me i guess. If i wanna spin around and no one is aroused let me. If i wanna draw let me. Sigh I'm not even gonna add all the other moods. I really feel like in DD/lg sometimes I'd rather not have that than to have and lose it. It kinda sucks sometimes. Yea i know the profile says you don't have to be a Daddy Dom, that's true. But it's true for a reason, sigh.

8/4/2016 8:17:03 AM
Don't stop your hunger for someone who won't feed you. Be straight up. Say what you need and if they won't give it, say you'll get it elsewhere (unless there's a medical or mental reason they can't then be nice) Stop denying yourself for people who aren't denying themselves for you.

8/3/2016 7:59:27 PM
For those who have had f buddies... Um... What did you get from it? How did you feel after? If you had f buddies in the past and don't in the present by choice, what changed your mind? I am thinking about it... But it's really not me... Plus the person wants way more than that supposedly but i don't want to offend them by thinking we'd be terrible together as a Couple or even as fwb... I'd rather be transparent with him but first I need to understand this f buddy stuff Thanks in advance

7/31/2016 4:03:47 PM
So it was cool... But i wanted chemistry i wanted butterflies i wanted just a little intellect... Sigh... Why are those that fit so well with us the ones who hurt us the most? Those who have done us no harm make us feel no click... That makes no sense. I'm going to give it time, plus it's local so how difficult can it be?

7/30/2016 11:50:05 PM
Wish me luck, local meet tomorrow

7/30/2016 2:57:05 PM
I need cuddles

7/26/2016 12:25:22 PM
To the gurls fussing about one liners... Here's the thing... I rather 5 words a man wrote than 250 he copy pasted. I don't know about you but even after 4 yrs on here (i started with a different profile) i still get paragraphs per message many of which are often copy paste. I get these because they think this is what we want, it's supply and demand. Even with my summer semester being over and work being slow i still lack the time or desire to read paragraphs per message from someone i might not even be interested in, or someone it's obvious wouldn't find me useful. I use to be one of those "no one liners" because i had 100 hi messages a day, but now I see why. I rather a "hi how are you?" It let's me know they are curious and inspires me to scan their profile. Next time you get a decent one liner at least check the profile, he might be the one.

7/26/2016 6:44:37 AM
A few messages have come my way expressing issue with the amount of time it's taking for me to be acquired. If I'm alright with it, why shouldn't you be? Some days it's more preferred than others, but it's okay. Gives me time to prepare, flirt, improve myself and life. In addition, if it hasn't been expressed, i am not for everyone and I can be quite fickle in the beginning. In other words it doesn't take much to push me away or lose my focus when things start out. Some guys have this whole I'll be mean or guarded until we meet junk going on, they fail to realize that approach dwindles my desire to meet if i had one to begin with. So ya... It's ok lol it really is.

7/24/2016 10:38:46 PM
Warm arms Chilled breeze No harm Just breathe Too far Don't wanna leave Close stars No city beams Polution less I moan yes He growled it's mine Am i the best A choke came I can't maintain My composure He flips me over On my belly Not or ready Grabs my hair Balls are sweaty Miss it there Life will test me To see how fair It's been getting Enough rain has fallen Enough sun for scalding Clear skies and autumn is calling Ummm i fit? Ummm he fits It's been said by others Should i believe it. Been fucked but only one lover I doubt I'll forget Now what to do Share what feels wrong Forget saying who it belonged to Let another rip off my thong Maybe Maybe not Maybe I'll just think like a dom Do it for the heck of it because it's really not wrong I just wanted to give If he'd take it Wanted to give my all For a reason But there was none Wasted They felt no love I will again I have before Good girls do win It's just something we have to wait for But until then do i add more Adventures with whoever I rather not but maybe I'll feel better If i do

7/24/2016 9:47:01 PM
Gosh i miss the feel of a cane Football season starts soon Any of u guys gonna fantasy this season?

7/24/2016 1:17:37 PM
I have a bit more time to get on here now, so hello. As for how things are going with having the dynamic i desire sometimes ya think ya ran into a decent potential and then ya realize they are or aren't the one. As for the summer, I'm about to decide if the possible meets are good ideas or not.

7/23/2016 9:02:58 AM
Wow a lifestyle doms vanilla wife actually left for real this chick has balls. That's what's up... If her dude had a little more understanding of the actual lifestyle I'd keep that spot warm and play house til we found a suitable replacement lmao

7/23/2016 12:31:15 AM
Ahhhhh

6/26/2016 12:46:07 AM
I had a good day... But right now... I want to fit perfectly in warm arms. I just do.

6/25/2016 1:35:36 PM
Topic: where i stand I'm not really braggy. I don't feel i have much to brag about but lifestyle wise I've been accused of looking for perfection. Nope i just expect some worth receiving my all because it's definitely what i give and once I see signs that you wouldn't handle or appreciate that, I move along.

6/25/2016 11:28:12 AM
Topic: people comparing ass fingering to bdsm... Fingering my ass doesn't make you a dom it makes you kinky. Fingering my ass means NOTHING AT ALL. So i fail to see a point. Just some guy fingering my ass... That's play and although I'm opening up to a play partner still man come on lol. People amaze me thinking because they're kinky or swingers that they're bdsmers... I'm not saying one is better than the other. What I'm saying is there's no grouping I'm not in this for kinks unless you wanna call D/s a kink. Lol control a kink... But to me the why is what makes something a kink or a lifestyle. The "kinky" things I've done were never done with me thinking about getting off. When a man who gets me comes along without a world of drama I'll clear my profile and just used the journal to share lol but maybe not cause doms can lie so much mayb I'll use it to play the same games they do lol and then call them mistakes lol

6/24/2016 9:34:43 PM
I no fewl gud Goes to lay down

6/24/2016 9:20:16 PM
Topic: describe what vulnerable feels like As one dom use to say when we'd have a heart to heart "exposed" For me it's like, easily accessible or guard down. When i was owned vulnerable times were when i guess my leash was tighter. I get in my think the best of everyone moods. My i just wanna be cuddled as friends mood. My this is probably bad but I don't wanna be mean mood. That's my general vulnerable mood. When I'm vulnerable stuff can slide that I'd normally curse someone out for. Like today I told a kinkster my tummy wwas hurting and before I knew it he's trying to get pics and talking about short dresses. Normally I'd either tell him off or end the conversation. Today I was more pouty and told him he made me feel like he didn't care by doing that and I let him smooth over. Now in a dynamic it's a bit different... I started to go into detail but i won't. I'll just say if i trust you or feel safe with you and I'm yours i feel vulnerable with you most of the time and it's obvious. I just i can't explain it... Even during sex it's just.... I can't... I don't know... I just feel... Vulnerable. But in the dynamic it's a safe yummy vulnerable and again I really would love to explain more but I gotta think about my safety and also I'm not really into kissing and telling. Outside of a dynamic it's a stranger danger type vulnerable and the few selfish dom acquaintances I've had usually end up fussing at me or forbidding me in some way. Those moods don't last long but when they come they come strong.

6/24/2016 8:09:47 PM
Take the cord of your girls ear buds wrap it up 3 times hit her with it Hurts Like heck

6/24/2016 5:07:02 PM
I plead temporary desperation lol why? Because I almost just asked this guy to b my Daddy who is way more into kink than D/s. Lol Sigh, but I'm in a vulnerable mood and i guess it would be nice to have a person and it's even nicer that he's single without attachments but... There's no chemistry. Heck even when my little friend vetted him it didn't go well lol I was just thinking for a moment maybe.... Idk I know people have lasting relationships and marriages only from what's familiar and comfortable and if i could he'd be perfect but... It's just... Not... Me And it really sucks

6/24/2016 12:12:41 AM
Feeling vulnerable and daddyless right now. I'm not sure what to do...

6/23/2016 10:01:47 AM
Topic: cuddle buddy?? I am picky about how my cuddles feel. If I arrange a cuddle night and the cuddles don't feel right what do I do just sit there through it? Or do I just get up and leave? Maybe I'm babygirl snob, but um if you don't know cuddles or stuffies me no likey you much as before lol. I'm thinking every weekend in July of having a spoil weekend. Like picky a local or somewhat local guy and just making him feel like he's the Sir in my life. Making him feel appreciated. Why? Because I miss doing stuff like that. I miss body worship, heck i haven't made a guy breakfast since January lol it feels so wrong. I haven't bathed a man in just over a year. I haven't dried off and massaged a man in 8 mths. Why you nay ask? I don't do stuff just because i enjoy it, I do stuff because it means something and the last guy who could have had that stuff done locked the bathroom door out of habit... That's a cop quirk i guess lol. Guys if you're attracted to a girl do not lock the bathroom door... This dude seemed like he wanted the pussy he already asked me to be his i said I'd rather we just date until i feel a click, but he also wanted sex but was trying to respectful. If he had left that door open that day, he would have been bathed, dried, had a nice massage, which might have motivated me to take his bbc (i did not like his size at all way too thick) but after massaging a Mans body sometimes it can magnify the chemistry. So yea I'll see what i can do about finding men to give some tlc to

6/23/2016 9:16:54 AM
Topic: "blacked Or "whited out" I often see other races touting getting blacked. I also see some talk about how well they are treated by black men. The white doms i have met were very different from each other but they all had a vibe of pride about being with me and as I've said before I know I'm nothing to write home about, but they were very pda, very "i have nothing to hide" very "even if I'm poly I'm focused on you". And when i think about it... It feels kinda nice. The black men I've met (notice i specify the ones i have met so I'm not making an ignorant generalization such as "black women aren't submissive") the black men I've met can focus but even the ones I've offered or given my heart to if another race pops up they rather chase that. Even if it means being used, put down, and disrespected. Something about having a certain race does something for most of the black men I've met. Even one guy on here came off almost anti white and i go to a different profile of his and lol what do you think i saw, lol. Maybe it's the same for white guys I've met. Maybe having a little butterscotch NOT CHOCOLATE there's NOTHING chocolate about me excluding my nipples. Maybe having some butterscotch flavor in their life strokes that ego a bit. Strokes that passion a bit. Maybe I should rekax and make it a point to stroke that cock a bit hehehe. Girls get "blacked" and it's like something to toute. I rarely see a girl get "whited out" and toute it lol. I think I'm finally motivated to change that. Ya know what I really wish? I really wish for someone i share chemistry who really didn't care about race. The messages like "i love black pussy" disgust me because no pussy is the same The black men looking at white women like the best thing ever disgust me because every woman is different. I know we all have preferences, fears, desires, i just wish they weren't based on something we can't control like color.

6/22/2016 11:53:28 PM
Topic: career to impress me... (this might actually sound arrogant which I do not do often at all but i need to get a point across) I've dealt with a man who didn't make much at all I've had a six figure guy 140+ iq sending me customized to my fav character keys to his house I've belonged to men that travel the US I've had the business owners The military vets The millionaire that needed a son to pass on his legacy to... (wasn't about looks because I'm not all that) Lincolns, benzes, rigs, convertibles, motorcycles are all nice. But here's the thing... It won't work. Throwing that stuff in my face won't get me interested. So just lean back If you have it like that good for you... Let me get to know you not your career title thrown around or hidden Just relax be you

6/22/2016 12:20:12 AM
Topic: if she's tight she's not aroused Stares Yep someone really said that. Besides me wondering how loose she is I was baffled because well... (thinks to avoid tmi) Ok i haven't had as many vaginal sex partners as i might like to say I've had (my slut for many side is constantly cock blocked by either selfish dom associates or my inner good girl) so naturally unless the guy is thin cocked and under 8 inches. entering will be a kinda task. Even then there's still gonna be... "a certain response" i guess. I've been dripping wet before. First time I recall the man's sheets were soaked and no i didn't do what most women call squirting aka peeing (yes it's pee studies have been conducted) but i was still super tight it was difficult for him to even slide a toy in me... Men I've been serious with have not had issue arousing me. A couple have had me dripping just from being around fully clothed no sexual talk or touch... But if or when they slid in things were still tight or snug. I think back to being nervous about sex because some guys would get frustrated or disappointed from tightness. So when i saw that topic it hit me kinda hard. If anytime a man feels I'm tight or snug or anytime i whimper means I'm not aroused then that would mean i have yet to be, and um... There's a few to disagree with that. If ya don't feel ouchy or feel tight around a man while you're wet, fine, but making the assumption that she isn't turned on isn't really fair. In no way am I touting tightness. I am just saying assumptions about it is pretty odd.

6/19/2016 10:21:53 PM
The cavs won I got mad attention from an associate Ayeeee I'm cool It's not being owned but Ayeeee I'm sorry there's something sexy about a guy (especially one who thinks he's vanilla) saying "if you're my woman I really won't share you, I'm a jealous man" lol

6/19/2016 10:05:57 PM
Did my grill thing for all the dads in my world and their friends It went just fine. Next year it'll be spoiling whatever d is connected to me.

6/18/2016 4:43:59 PM
I made him put his phone down hehehe that's what's up a girl ca rock with that. Happy weekend people

6/17/2016 3:00:49 AM
Sips coffee I'd rather 3 words you wrote for me than to have 500 you send to all that strike your fancy lol

6/16/2016 11:49:29 PM
The moment when you suddenly realize your new running shoes matches your favorite tumbler lol unintentional swag lol

6/16/2016 10:49:56 PM
My friend and mentor has motivated me to not stop progress and to just keep living and reaching goals. I will... Until I can no More. She is truly amazing and nah I'm not kissing butt cause i doubt she's even on here, it's just the truth.

6/15/2016 10:31:24 PM
That was an interesting night lol... But i still say nothing compares to love and passion, I'll have it one day

6/15/2016 12:32:18 PM
Should i get licked tonight? Lol

6/15/2016 9:05:45 AM
Topic: feeling used There's a good way to feel used... I miss that There's another way some call used i rather say misused lol Many s types use it in the area of sex. Many babygirls use it to say a D got sex and left... For me, I dexide in my mind if I willingly have sex with someone that if it's a one nighter I'll be ok. It's about being mentally ready My first time with my former i knew I'd be kinda how i was but I also knew i wanted him, so if we had sex and that was that I already decided I'd be ok, but it wasn't. He came back for me the next day and for the following years he was the only man inside of me. Could I say "oh he just used me for sex" sure I could but it wouldn't be accurate if that's the case we used each other. Even if his plan was to just get sex (ya never know) i don't get why some females act like they aren't present during sex. Like it doesn't feel good... I mean I've had sex that didn't feel good but I wouldn't be likely to repeat it. Our sex usually was great so if you have sex with a guy and you both enjoy it then he's gone i get it's saddening but the whole he used me thing... Unless the sex was bad or you froze up because of nervousness (it happens) i don't feel it's being misused. I feel another word like mislead or tricked is more appropriate. Just my opinion

6/14/2016 11:17:04 PM
I'm laying on your shoulder Begging you to flip me over So i can backwards cowgirl ride you Your stamina is like a soldier Even if it isn't Sir just train me my precision Will Inspire your decision To Take the lead position As My King the one I listen I'll Keep your manhood spitting As Much as I like your hitting It's Really about me living As The girl who you find fitting That Would be truly fulfilling Like your dick is in me Let's take a trip to Kissimmee That Night you'll start pinning me Or Maybe you'll just grin at me While I do my best at hitting the Back Of my throat you're pulling the Hair That you hold my tears dripping If This is bold you really haven't seen My Definition of daring

6/14/2016 6:30:29 PM
I get irritated when subs or slaves put on their profile I'm a s but not Your s... But sometimes I see the point.
Submission is earned. Dominance is EARNED.
In my personal opinion. It's either earned or INSPIRED
Inspiring something in someone takes EFFORT. Something has to be done to make things go in that direction.
So if you're getting to know me, you are getting to know me as a person! Not as your slave. If things naturally flow in that direction, great, but for all general purposes I could care less how long you have been a "Master", telling someone that you don't own to do something and THEN expecting it to be done without question, is not necessarily functional. Some might say, they don't ask because this is not vanilla. Asking for what you desire is NOT about vanilla verses D/s. I've been OWNED and I've visited Masters who still said "will you..." "could you..." hell they even said "thank you" sometimes, lmao. That's not at ALL about being vanilla, that's about being RESPECTFUL.
In the beginning stages (in my opinion) respect with us should be mutual. Heck even if I belong to the master, there's still a certain level of respect I'd desire. I thought my profile said that at one point, it's a shame I might have to add it again.
Respect comes before trust in my opinion, and I trust people until given a reason not to, so if you show lack of respect for me, then that's a reason not to trust.
In other news, guys I wish you realized how old being called a brat by people who don't even know you really is.
What's more AMAZING is I think people are so accustomed to calling people brat that they fail to recall the definition of it.
Maybe they find me being offended to be odd because I'm not someone who gives all words already defined new definitions just because this is "the lifestyle".

Websters definition of brat: a :  child

; specifically :  an ill-mannered annoying child <a spoiled brat>
b :  an ill-mannered immature person
I am many things, immature is usually NOT one of them. I have many faults, lacking manners is NOT one of them.
When I'm in little mode sure I might be playful but that's being me.
Now there are some who know me, and affectionately title me as a brat when I'm INTENTIONALLY being difficult, but that's more a term of endearment, but usually the definition that has been created by those who don't know me is
Brat: one who doesn't do what you say when they are not given a reason.
That's crazy... That's nonsense... In actuality to call someone a brat because they didn't do what you wanted is... dun dun dun... BEING A BRAT.
D types, please check the brattiness at the door. thanks and goodnight

6/13/2016 11:56:49 PM
One guy today messaged asking if i was real. Not sure if he meant a real person a real slave lol a real female lol or what To my knowledge only two guys off of here have warm dripping wet proof of the female part lol. But 2 more could vouch for me being the girl in the pics And about 10 could vouch for me at least being human. Not sure how many could vouch for the slave part lol men fluctuate on thinking you're a slave based on their mood attitude and feelings i guess. I am selective, but i have met a few men from this site in real time. So approaching me like I'm some hide behind the pc wannabee simply will not do. And just because i didn't meet ypu doesn't mean I'm a fake lol. It means I didn't meet you for whatever reason. So a new potential and also a dom I've known a while hopefully within the near future will both be added to the list of those who have met me, and maybe kinda soon lol my celibacy stretch will be broken if chemistry sparks. I hope I still remember how to throw it back lol.

6/13/2016 11:40:29 PM
What am I into... I get that question often... So the answer sucks and i say this with no arrogance... I'm into what my owner is into In my past we may have had sessions but if so i knew nothing of it. I liked what he liked because pleasing was what I loved Of course you learn your slave and of course I got to please in some of my favorite ways, but I'm into control and pleasure. I'm into TPE, I'm into He man, me girl lol. I'm in to the DS Sm from bdsm lol the b is cool too but I'm not into it unless my owner is. Call it bimbo or mindless i could care less. In the words of lionel Richie "i call it Love"

6/12/2016 11:50:56 PM
Before bed... Ya i know 2:43am and just getting in bed I'm sooo unowned right? That will change, I have faith. I wasn't up lolly gagging i was being productive and i lolly gagged before that. I started to write something but I'm not going to. Life isn't a race against others, I'm not going to put others down to lift me up. I'll just say, if you become the center of my world time out that's a lie, redo If you are someone i care about and I think you care about me too, my goal is going to be to build you up and help you get closer to your goals in and out of the lifestyle. It's just that simple. It's just how I "role" lol yes it's the right role lol get it?

6/11/2016 8:06:24 AM
I don't scene really but ummmm a good sex scene just went through my head... The guy is fucking me and I'm all please no wait i... Then everytime he thrusts inside he's like "who am I" and keeps slapping me because I'm not calling him his desired title. Then he goes deeper and chokes me and asks again. I finally give the right answer. Then he's pounding harder asking another question and I'm moaning you are you are you are... He covers my mouth banging me harder and i just lay there holding him and crying and he stops inside and releases.

6/11/2016 6:54:04 AM
Sometimes there's questions that are better asked of close friends. Sometimes certain groups are better than others for certain pieces of advice. Before ya ask something especially s types ask yourself "how crazy would i look at someone for the same exact question" then come back to reality. Just because this is thev "lifestyle" doesn't mean youccan or should forget your common sense. D types, keep a question on standby "if someone vanilla asked the same thing of you how would you respond?" sometimes that question helps subs or slaves say "oh ya this is still real life" Then the common sense becomes active again.

6/11/2016 1:59:23 AM
It's 5am on Saturday lol I just finished looking at this owned girl thoroughly used... I do miss it. I'm enjoying the whole no rules free thing but ufff i still miss it. Trusting someone to shed your blood tears sweat and fears Mmmm that's love lol

6/10/2016 1:29:02 PM
My flirting... Um.... Well... I feel like I haven't flirted lately, but sometimes it just jumps out and when it does I'm just like um... Well lol... Today it was like oops did i just do that then I realized wait lol nobody is going to do anything about it lol. That's the odd part about being unowned you forget that you are sometimes. Shrugs Should i go to Florida to see this mean domly man? Lol

6/8/2016 9:09:41 PM
Topic: are you always so silly / talkative? Nope but if you bring that out in me it's a good thing. In the same day (actually yesterday) i had one man (dom) tell me i was more talkative than slaves he'd spoken to before, compliment or insult idk lol. Another man (vanilla) complained about having to carry the conversation. It just depends on the person and the vibe. Some people bring out a serious side in me, some i get all mickey (love to see you smile), some i just go blank... Every once in a while you meet someone where even the silence is cool. I've only meet two or three like that: of course the scorpios and one benze driving Virgo (only mentioned the car so he'd know i was typing about him) Communication is big for me. It doesn't have to be everyday but just feeling that connect is nice.

6/7/2016 10:09:42 PM
Omg the whole thing about a mans dna remaining forever... Inside a woman... Ok yea um... For once I don't feel bad about not being really experienced with multiple people. I also understand why some people look nothing like their dads lol dude he looks like her ex from years ago lol. I'm not planning on kids but i dont want to carry everyone's dna... So yea um... Goes to rethink the play partner idea lol. I didn't get clarity if the man had to release inside of you or not but it even mentioned oral so... Yikes Plus for the women who have cheated and gp back to the first guy or even to the man do you realize the dude she cheated withs dna is still in her? Wow yea i saw the studies but i need more evidence so I'll research tomorrow if it's solid um.... Idk i just don't know I wish people i fall for would just be decent to me and appreciative not insult my intelligence, then I wouldn't have to worry about dna and others dna in me. Lol no I'm not preg It's amazing what people dream up from what I write sometimes

6/7/2016 12:05:08 AM
If your profile makes it clear you aren't into or exclude black women I'm not going to waste my time trying to convince or show you anything. I respect your preference, so should you. In other words there's no point in twisting it or explaining. Meanwhile I also understand a preference can be just that a preference but there's a difference.

6/6/2016 10:38:57 PM
Ufff topic "u can't handle me anyway" Nilla guys say that and im just like ok lol. I guess I'm supposed to take it as challenge lol i don't because once they say it i already know they aren't ready. Plus I'm like if you already have a girl you aren't ready for me I'll run you crazy or make you so happy one way or the other nilla girl will notice lol. I'm just like ok dude... But when i say ok they get irritated. They look at me and see innocence They hear my ok and think scared I'm cool with them thinking that because only a very few amount know how or if I'll get down... And I'm cool with that. I rather that... For the longest how i am has bothered me. For a while my prior training has annoyed me... But I'm at the point where I don't mind. I've had real time where I did as i pleased I've hqd real time with a choke chaine (literally and figuratively) and i preferred the latter. Right now I'm enjoying the freedom, but it will end at some point and when it does whoever has me will appreciate me and my limits or lack of lol.

6/6/2016 6:33:11 PM
Cubs better win

6/6/2016 2:56:54 PM
Lol so black snake moan... All chained up, lol. Don't underestimate the power of chaining a girl up. But have logic about it, make it so we can get around and be functional ya know? The dude was like daddy dom personified lol. If i could attract that kimda tlc I'd be cool

6/4/2016 10:32:14 PM
I feel you inside You fill me inside We can't hide We can't hide Laying here connected Laying here so warm You inside of me Your manhood demanding more It hurts I love it I'm wet You love it We take with our moans We sing with our bodies We shock with our grinds You say you want me I say mmmmmm You say cum I say mmmmm You say love I say yes You say enough I beg For more Your beds Your doors Are home To my Inner Passion

6/4/2016 8:04:46 PM
Uffff my orgasm control is so off... I tried not cumming just now and it was quite unsuccessful. My lil remote thingy is quite powerful, but oh well. When I'm taken again I'll get use to it

6/3/2016 6:25:08 AM
Lol talking to me this early about being naked in ya jump seat lol.... Deduhdee #rarelykissntell

6/2/2016 11:53:37 PM
Buying me stuff before meeting me but u can't remember if I suggested a movie or not??? What?????? No like really the dude says he bought me a bunch of stuff But then says "you mentioned a movie right" lol i swear the only thing saving him is a hint of bostonian in his accent I'm not the type you gotta spoil with "stuff" So i don't even know if i wanna meet him lol I don't I want a daddy who gives me cuddles and spanks and fusses sometimes lol and is transparent. Stomps!!!!!

6/2/2016 11:43:01 PM
Sooo tipsy Homework done Watching scifi Wit newly legal pal Both just tipsy We so need daddies ok I'm lying she needs a male sub but still lol i want my Daddy!!! Daddyless is mandarin for purgatory lol Ok I'm lying I'm lying ahhhh wish I was lying between a daddies legs suckling ever so sweetly

6/2/2016 8:52:40 PM
Uff me being lil is not like a roleplay. If you want the roleplay cool b a play partner but if you want something for real, it's not about me acting young. That's one reason I leaned back on finding a daddy. Sheesh I can find another master I'm confident in that but daddies... That are compatible with me are Rare... A holes yes, but rare lol

6/1/2016 12:13:13 AM
My views on : Play in public ... such as getting fingered in a restaurant or movie or outdoors in the dark? Hope the asker doesn't mind me using it as a topic ifso I'll remove it. My views on it... Sigh... I had to think about not cumming when i first read it simply because i have such vivid good memories associated with that... Under tables In movoes Outdoors Mmmmmmmmmmmm is mmmmmmmm a view? Lol

5/29/2016 10:06:30 PM
Self discipline: night people Would be so much better cuddling up to a daddy telling me to turn off my phone but life can't stop cause of daddyless swag lol

5/29/2016 9:48:52 PM
So i did open it up for topic ideas... There's a few already so I'll address 2. is it too demanding for a Dom to set his s type an orgasm quota... like "today you must have 20 minimum"? Of course it depends on the s type but for me it would depend if it was real time or long distance when the quota comes up. Me cumming 20 times on my own is just not going to happen, but I could be around an owner and want to cum sopping wet just from his scent or facial expression. I'm pretty sure I've cum 20 times in a day and maybe only half were from sexual things. On the other hand I'm a reasoms kinda girl so if it's 20 times I'm gonna be curious of why... So i guess my answer is "not too demanding but a bit far"... But it also depends if the s was trained to cum on command (please be careful with that) i promise after you're use to it it'll be soooo hard to cum for a while without it. The other topic... Why don't we see your other parts ass / pussy? Simple answer "cause any owner I'd have: past or future may not want you to" i usually get selfish d types. Plus I don't think it's necessary i want something to be set aside kinda special. I mean if you're showing the world then it lets me know your focus is first that of a sexual nature and it turns me off. It could also come off kind of thirsty. One guy sent me a nice message and he had built in cool points because he worked in transportation but he attached 2 dick pics without me even expressing interest. Don't get me wrong occasionally I'll like a dick pic but those men with dick pics aren't men I'd take seriously at all. It's the same the other way around. I get men are visual, but i think even men I'd entertain as play partners but especially potential masters would feel good about a snug little nookie their sliding into not being on this site lol. (i only said snug because that's what the last dom i did anything with called it, yikes it's been a while lol) A bit of tmi none of the D types i ever did anything with AT ALL showed me a pic of it before we met. If they had i would have not wanted anything and maybe not even met them. None asked to see my nookie but one i volunteered because he wanted me to grow the hair out so i wanted him to see. I see tits differently because i equal it to a man taking a pic with his shirt off. There's no entrance on my tits lol. Thanks for the topics

5/29/2016 9:52:11 AM
Thanks to those encouraging me to write but right now i am just focusing on my goals... Having a amaster to base my goals on is much more peaceful and structured for me, but that never worked out for me in the past. I'm enjoying this weekend but glad it's almost over. So um... I guess if you have topics for me to write about i will, as for me personally I don't have anything I wish to share right now.

5/28/2016 11:00:51 PM
Cuddles would be nice I'm sensitive tonight and wish I was safe in arms Still a good mood Just feeling like a daddy dom is needed Do any really want to be needed Night ni

5/28/2016 8:43:07 AM
Morning it's a beautiful day. One thing i love about some doms, they think shyness is a good thing and don't try changing it. As for me... I'm not really sure I wanna go to Miami anymore. I know I need to get back on my location research. I checked out some apartments in a larger NC city but i kinda stopped because I was trying to see what would happen with someone I've been talking to off and on for a year ish... Nothing happened so no more hold back on leases if i find the right spot. I was afraid to sign a lease a bit because i kept feeling as soon as I did the right dom would pop up and then relocation would have to wait a year... But oh well if the right man or men appear they'll work with it i guess. Monday I'll contact the school to see what's up with my info. I'm just really needing some atl air. I think after i get there a lit of frustration will fade.

5/28/2016 1:25:02 AM
Slide in me Defend me From My Inhibitions If you feel I'm destined to be yours

5/27/2016 11:36:54 PM
Being a total brat to this guy who claims to live in atl... I don't buy it because he changed the location and then a few months back I suggested we meet while i was there (i know shy me) and he poof vanished so whatever he deserves my bratty energy now that he's resurfaced chicken

5/27/2016 9:51:22 PM
And anal cuddles and anal and snuggles

5/26/2016 9:46:46 AM
Ayyyyeeee people wanna be single so bad make it happen folks People wanna play make it happen folks People wanna own make it happen folks People want me to play dumb... Well ya can't have always do what ya want

5/25/2016 10:17:27 AM
Why do people say "always" in regards to a relationship? I haven't said always since I was 19 lol. I'm not naive enough to think a relationship is going to be always. One day you can think you're the luckiest person alive and the next you realize you are a pawn lol. I saw a woman I look up to use the term and i was shocked. A few years doesn't mean you'll always anything. On the other hand I'm happy for people who can think that. Bliss I guess.

5/25/2016 10:07:11 AM
Don't mix cocktail wine and rum, i woke up wondering how my panties got off (i was home so I'm fine) lol I'm such a gangsta lol. Today is better. My classes were purged but that's ok in another week they'll have the info they need and I can start. I hAve a cute Betsy johnson backpack so that totally makes me middle side happy. It'll also work as a weekend bag for whatever. Marriage dude I just couldn't take it anymore he kept asking me to be his girl and then said he'd stop. He kept talking about spending lots of money in one day. I just... Ufff then he became a bit antagonistic lol. Plus he kept offering me money, I should have accepted but we hadn't even met and he admitted he felt buying things is an excuse to neglect a girl. I'm sorry I just couldn't lol. I haven't ever dissed a scorpio without them first doing the biker shuffle on my heart but first time for everything right? If this is a hang over it's a very productive one i made dinner and it's only 1pm lol

5/24/2016 12:59:45 PM
Next week everything will be much better. Plus I think I'll arrange a meet with this local sub / brat who has really been trying to get with me. I'm not into male subs but i refuse to have a boring summer, plus I'll likely hit atl for memorial day so I guess I'll go ahead and break this no sex stretch while down there.

5/24/2016 12:03:49 PM
It's not the best day but it's bright outside. I have to get back to putting myself first and not those around me.

5/22/2016 9:35:57 PM
My heart will go on...

5/22/2016 9:13:34 PM
Sigh.... It was a good day, but I felt so drained and without a daddy Master to look after me it was kinda bothersome, but thank you to the threat to punch me in my toe and other stuff. So i was watching a show i like again and Uff the character plays a man who is always there for her. Even when she was married a bit and her husband was slacking this guy was still there, but when she wanted to marry this guy he wasn't ready. I know it's tv but it's art imitating life. Anywho if i had a man always there for me like that, I'd just enjoy it and treasure it, but eh lol...

5/22/2016 2:51:07 PM
Is there anyone in Miami that isn't psycho? If you are cool and down to earth message me please. If i connect with someone(s) cool I'll be down there for about a week. I'll have a room if we are comfy enough maybe we can chill there, but i move slow so i rather talk a bit first. Let me know.

5/22/2016 6:48:24 AM
I wanna talk about settling right quick. I personally feel most people I know are settling. Most of them when in genuine moods will agree with that. I do feel settling for a person is a horrible thing, meanwhile settling with a person or their situation is sweet and possibly good karma as long as the situation isn't ripping you apart. I don't feel i settled for anyone I've been technically in a relationship with. With one there came a point where I settled for the situation he put us in. At the time and now I think it's probably good karma because i was trying to do what was right for him or us... Later it started ripping me apart and causing way more agony and no good at all and that is when you look at the situation for yourself. Even in lifestyle you can't bank on people protecting you fully, you have to protect you.

5/21/2016 8:57:51 PM
I made it 24 hrs without sugar at all. Besides a slight head ache it went well. I didn't even eat bread with sugar in it

5/21/2016 8:56:33 PM
I've been told or asked why I make certain activities seem romantic... To me it depends on how they are done but they can be very romantic even if it seems kinda Dark. If the s is yours you can make almost anything seem like an intimate cuddle even if it makes her screen out in agony.

5/21/2016 8:03:12 PM
I saw a question... It basically dealt with your sub teaching or telling you what she liked... A man wandered if it made him less domly... I don't feel it does, but it also made me think for a moment when i was owned we just didn't function that way. I think the post was more a sexual vibe and in that area it wasn't about what i liked. It wasn't about what i enjoyed i craved his control and approval, so it wasn't really "do you like this" as our bond grew he'd inquire of my feelings and he figured out how to get whatever reaction he wanted or taught me to relax enough to give it, but it just wasn't.... About me in that way. Some may see that as rude or stupid or whatever, lol some may totally understand. M/s is different for everyone, but maybe that's a bit of my apprehension... I just want something to flow like that again

5/21/2016 3:23:53 PM
It's a lovely day isn't it?

5/20/2016 8:17:22 AM
So grades are out... It's funny how i can look at my grades and actually see when i was stressed lol. Sometimes people come into your life just long enough to knock your focus off if you let them but I got 2 levels of math out of the way and totally passed everything else, so I'm okay. I've gotta talk to my advisor and trying getting summer situated. If my gpa was where I wanted i wasn't doing summer but oh well. There's a lot of people who don't think I'll finish but i will. There's a lot of people who frankly didn't care until i didn't care if they cared anymore. I'm cool, plus my advisor has a hot Boston accent so it'll be a joy to hear that voice lol

5/19/2016 10:31:41 AM
Communication styles have a lit to do with how things progress in getting to know other people especially when what you start with is online or phone. Some friends i can text and have a blast but not talk to. Others I can talk to for hours but texting is draining. Some with messaging can give off certain vibes and that's fine we all have different styles. Some prefer a debate type of discussion, some rather interrogation style, other prefer a peaceful flow, sometimes some even enjoy antagonistic... That's great as long as whoever you are talking or chatting with respomds well to it at lease in free time. I'm more of the peaceful flow type. If it's a struggle to have a natural flow in communicating where we both enjoy it without assumptions then it's great, but that's just me. In life you'll have to deal with many types of people, but in this there's no one you "have" to deal with, isn't that great? I think that's another reason why I rather not belong to anyone with negative situations involving others because even if it's not directly in your face, you end up dealing with it, and if they keep it inside it comes out as hostility or stress toward you. For me, it's just too much. Lol oh and if something is yours, to me it means someone else's name isn't on it, and someone else's funds aren't wrapped up in it... So sometimes when people say my this my that I'm thinking "rofl it's not yours maybe you had a hand in acquiring it" It's like men saying my child but their name isn't on the birth certificate and they're sharing costs with the bio dad lol dude it's not yours lol

5/17/2016 10:36:03 AM
Have you ever asked someone out before seeing them in person? How did that work out? I know when we were kids we would but as an adult I've never done that. I have felt like I belonged to a man before meeting but we both wanted to meet and be sure of what we felt. We did and we were right but still... I know i know some people do online but that's not me at all especially if you're let's say only 2 hrs away lol. I am just curious. I know certain people just go for what they want, but i just... Idk Granted when a man says certain things i do wanna commit for that moment but it's no comparison. My former said lots of things that made me want to be his but none compared to the first time he embraced me and said "hey babygirl" it was like magic or something... So i don't wanna say things that makes a man want me and then meet and feel like "oh gee hi there" lol... So guys (and if ladies read this) share with me, has someone wanted you or you them before meeting? Even a step deeper has someone asked you to be theirs before meeting? It's one thing to want someone before meeting but to verbalize it, isn't that a bit bold? I've clicked with a guy from here before meeting like way before like talking 3 yrs off and on and finally meeting last year (for those who know me no i never talked to this guy at the same time I was talking to my former i don't work like that) but anyway when we met the connection was still there but I got the vibe he was more a sadist than a dom... Plus by then i had been jerked around so much in our dealings that i didn't expect him to want me (hears ex in my head saying "that's your problem you never expect them to want you") anyway, point is in that case if i had offered or he'd accepted it would have been a waste because d/s wise we didn't see things the same. So i was wrong thinking we'd be a total fit. As vanilla partners we would have fit and Omg did i love........ Nevermind tmi, which brings me to another question: have you ever thought you'd be absolutely great with someone and then meet and realize "not so much" like i just described? How did that work out? Am I being too nosey? Lol i mean i just figured since I let you guys jump into my views or thoughts i could pick yours... I'm listening

5/16/2016 1:19:20 PM
Alright, so I'm a bit calm after my rant a few days ago. Here's the game plan. I'm currently open to play partners now. I have never been open to them before because for me it's just stupid, but it's summer and trying give guys on here a shot has been a ball of confusion even when i think i have found the one so... I'm only open to daddies, disciplinarians, or dommes located in NC SC or ATL as play partners. If you have people in your life with drama or complicated situations we just will not discuss daily life we play we leave no aftercare necessary I'll handle myself or get a friend for that. If you don't have complicated situations in life: I'm hoping to hang as friends and also have play. Example: day at carowinds and then some ddlg play or slight s&m or oral exchange. Aftercare would be appreciated. No sex beyond oral. If the right Daddy or Master(s) find me all play will END i am loyal. I will still be open to relocating for future Masters or Daddies. Please message me if interested in being a play partner, i want to get to know you FIRST I'm still open to a long term M/s bond just jaded right now

5/15/2016 11:59:21 AM
Single is a very funny word. So many people say they're single and I'm guessing they mean thry "feel" single, but for the other person it's not about how you "feel" it's about the FACTS. Assisting a person in wasting precious time on you is not love, it's actually quite cruel. I can't let the actions of others get to me, all I can do is try not to be like them. Apl i can do is try to wisely use whatever time I have left in life. Ya know what's odd lately I've been thinking, if i had some huge killing disease i really wouldn't even fight it, I'd just let it take me away because some days I feel like I'm breathing for what exactly? I rarely wish people would make better use of birth control lol. But since they don't, I'm here... I'm making a list of goals and looking over goals i did reach. I feel like I'm going to be found. I feel like I'm going to xome out of this swinging. I feel like I wasted A WHOLE LOT of time in my 20's lifestyle related, but then again all the crap i learned has helped to benefit others and it helps benefit me because when doms or "masters" or "daddies" she signs i know what I'm looking at and I can run. I am going to figure it all out. I am going to make some person(s) very pleased I am going to reach my goals I am not going to spend life putting happiness aside or using people for selfish reasons or fear of standing on my own. I'm better than that

5/11/2016 6:02:21 PM
I'm just gonna not really think about all this very much... If that's possible... Since 2010 my lIfe has revolved around Bdsm. Before that it revolved around d/s before I knew about bdsm. Before that it revolved around putting my desires aside for others... So I'm not sure if it's possible but I'm going to try. Collarspace hasn't brought me anything but lies pain disappointment and disgust... Yea a few good memories but still... I'm not going to say I'll leave but I'm really just questioning it all... Well i don't question if I'm a slave i don't question that I met TWO soulmates both too fricking afraid to let it be in one way or another. I don't question that people will forever do things without thinking. I don't question that somewhere he or they hell even she is out there somewhere... Wait i do STRONGLY question that but I only question it because of being on this site and what comes from it. So why not leave? I don't know I just don't know Does this all have to be so hard? Before the "are you ok" messages starting flooding in... I'm alive Why every time I express myself is it like I'm on the edge of breathing? I'm just a bit jaded A bit disappointed Fuck it I'm just tired Tired of wanting to serve but no one REALLY ready to accept it Tired of being unowned but too much self respect to submit to crazy people Tored of almost no one GENUONELY single or UPFRONT ABOUT THEIR RELATIONSHIP STATUS I'm tired of feeling someone is too good or not serious enough. So with this comes... Idk It was a rant Right now just a rant The world doesn't stop just because i rant lol

5/11/2016 5:15:38 AM
Maybe her maybe not? Hehehe it's kinda a new thing from the messages lately.... I find it amusing lol

5/10/2016 7:38:06 PM
Reading is fundamental lol

5/9/2016 10:42:57 PM
I miss the road tonight maybe just because it was a rough day

5/9/2016 9:32:16 PM
So I've had like 3 messages just today talking about my pics here being defiant....??? Wtf??? How when the pics don't even show my face? How when i haven't been own in yrs technically. There's only one person on the face of this earth who could call my pics defiant and that's because one goes against something i was trained not to do but that's not where these messages are coming from so huh??? Ufff I'm getting that week away from cs itch again it comes every few months lol

5/9/2016 8:12:31 PM
When asked about my status i say I'm picky or selective or haven't found the right fit for this point in my life or people have obligations. Why do I say that? Because it's true. In the past my answer would lead someone to believe I'm unowned. Which is fact. It would also lead someone to believe I'm single, again fact! The thing is on more than a few occasions lifestyle d types don't function the same way... They say I'm picky or haven't found the right one or something of that form and what it actually means is I'm married or I'm a chaser who will never be satisfied because it's just who i am, or it means I already have a few but one or two aren't acting right so I'm seeking a replacement, or it means I'm in the middle of a bunch of relationship stuff... I've never encountered or heard a girl encounter a situation where it really means I'm single or don't own anyone or I'm openly happily poly... I don't get that, and I'm about ready to stop trying to get it. Oddly the doms who don't know they're doms or doms who don't date from online seem to be a bit more straight up. If they're picky they're picky if they're owning 3 but dumping one they say it. Unless their scorpios lol. I know go to munches get involved get off line... Well that's not the most comfy way for me to meet people and the local guys aren't my type but oddly those who fall into my type also fall into the not transparent area... So i just feel like giving up cs on one side because i have only met one person from this site who doesn't have an issue claiming his slave from the very freaking beginning and explaining why he is open to adding. I respect him as a friend for that even though he's mean lol. On the other side i feel like I should just continue the being open but not looking thing i had going on and maybe the types who say "I'm not with anyone because... " will really mean they're not with anyone. Or those that are with people will say IN THE VERY FIRST CONVERSATION "i own xyz but i seek more this is why" I swear I am poly friendly i have friends exes and maybe enemies that will vouch for my almost forcefulness to poly lol but it's more comfy when i know on the front end. It's something else I've noticed and I'm not bashing it's just an observation: a good amount of black doms wanna say black subs are demanding or aren't submissive which isn't true because they haven't dealt with all black slaves or subs but if i said "I've only met one black dom clear or transparent about his status from the very beginning" they'd probably go bonkers. But it's true... Also the whole bs about age... That one black dom who was actually up front in the first convo about being single happened to be 25. Yea i passed because maturity in another area was still an issue but I had an amazing date. He was kind and caring and it just felt so relaxing to know for a fact I didn't have to wonder or have stress or waot for more information to come but it is what it is right? If i had known the lifestyle was going to be this way everytime i think i would have passed and just kept dating dominant vanillas.

5/9/2016 7:10:49 PM
It's all a joke isn't it? Lol Who is having a night cap with me? I'm tired Today was just ufff I need atl air again that's all then I'll be fine

5/8/2016 10:33:22 PM
Crying ur guts out to someone totally emotionally unattached is really a bad idea. Sigh you ever look at someone and think "we can not be related!" Lesson learned... I have the information i needed. I really sometimes miss having someone who understands moments like this...

5/8/2016 6:04:22 PM
Hope everyone had a lovely weekend. If you didn't there's always the weekend ahead.

5/6/2016 7:12:28 AM
There's a guy on here called super trucker lol that brings back some funny stuff. So it's the weekend... To the mother's happy mother's day... Hopefully you did your best to raise them right and not turn them into spoiled manipulative twits lol. If you no longer have your mother remember the good times and if you have made someone a mother be decent to her... Sometimes I wonder about men who procreate with a woman and then backstab them. I'm like dude karma is a bitch so you may never know the trouble in relationships your offspring go through but they will go through trouble and it will be your fault.

5/5/2016 10:31:02 PM
Ewww icky some man messaged me about his seed and my cunt... Ya i know it's just the net but if i had a daddy master person I'd pout to him to protect me and my cunt

5/5/2016 10:16:19 PM
Ok gotta add for those curious about my thigh high fix lol, not thigh high boots but socks and stockings. And yes they all arrived. I'll take a few for a trip and leave the rest.

5/5/2016 8:59:27 PM
The semester is over! I'm likely taking summer classes... If you're Local or visit often and have references for spanking, i might be interested in being a play partner unless i have other commitments by then. Contact me if interested

5/5/2016 12:39:53 PM
So a sore clit and two orgasms later.... I still am irritated horny sad and tired I have to finish studying If i had a person he'd take me out for fresh air lol that's sounds like a puppy O well contemplating getting drinks tonight and getting some lip practice lol

5/5/2016 11:44:16 AM
Stop complaining that he didn't make you cum and take your ass to sleep on edge

5/5/2016 11:41:04 AM
Just because you miss someone doesn't mean you aren't ready to move on. I also fail to see harm in trying to move on. I don't expect anyone to sit around tripping over me unless they screwed it up and even then ya screw something up try fixing it if you actually know what the issue is after that if it doesn't work or you are unable to change find whatever makes you happy because clearly it wasn't the person you screwed things up with... I'm really having a draining day, finals are almost done but I have one more. I found out something really annoying, and I'm daddyless on a gloomy day. A Master friend made me laugh about something we both saw oddly but it's not the same. I want a person or persons for me. To everyone who has a local or live in or partner at your grasp don't take it for granted. Most doms will take it for granted anyway but whatever. As for my entries... Thank you for reading. I'm going to give it a bit of a rest. I'm really in the mood to suckle and fall to sleep on a dom or get licked till I pass out

5/5/2016 7:54:49 AM
You ever feel like somebody reached in your heart and ripped it out

5/5/2016 6:47:50 AM
Yaaaay my thigh highs come today!!! I can't wait to try them on and get them ready for my trip!

5/4/2016 8:48:13 PM
https://youtu.be/IgLcQmlN2Xg Hehehe

5/4/2016 8:07:05 PM
Ufff white sox were supposed to win

5/4/2016 7:32:27 PM
Finds a button that says "charges" presses it. Why? For neglect Screams loud

5/4/2016 6:14:25 PM
Married and sick... I see a high number of "my wife is sick and doesn't or can't please me" If i were open to marriage we'd have this talk beforehand so he wouldn't have to go sneaking around... I get sick pick one or two but don't go around lying or Being a whore. Why? Because there's loyalty and stds lol. If I'm sick and can but won't have sex I'll find you someone or a few just be safe and if i won't find you someone divorce my ass please. Lol all this for better for worse but refusing to please your hubby or refusing to let him be with someone who will please him lol whatever. All this I'm hiding because my wife is sick or wouldn't understand whatever. Unless she can't physically hear or respond she's capable of having a conversation about your needs. Now if she or he for that matter can't respond that's a bit different. Let's face it lol marriage is a sham for the most part and that sham is a shame.

5/3/2016 1:08:59 PM
If you have no desire for a discussion please don't message me. This is a bdsm site yes and I get some D types are one sided, but it makes NO sense to message me if you don't desire a response that's like forcing submission LOL

5/3/2016 5:48:40 AM
It's hard to explain lol no it's not control the mind and the body will follow totally overused phrase but it's true for me, occasionally my body will follow for the heck of it but if that happens my mind will not be available after the fact. If I'm into you it's likely i get into what you're into but the whole what you're into coming up first... I get it's a necessary conversation but... Idk

5/3/2016 5:42:57 AM
So this guy was saying he doesn't feel a girl should go out without her man... He was vanilla or at least he thinks he is lol... So naturally a good back and forth convo occurred. For me "sips tea" it's all hot and sexy for a man to feel that way, meanwhile.... If he doesn't wanna do stuff then i feel like I should be able to have fun... Granted, he was specifically saying the club and for the few here that know me, that's a non issue unless under major peer pressure lol. I get where he's coming from but he mentioned breaking up with girls because of it and I'm like uh people will have different interests lol. I'm not likely hitting the club but when not owned I'm going to do my thing, heck while owned I'm still going to live and experience different outings with permission yes but still. Plus even though he'll likely just be a pal he lives in the wrong state to expect me not to be out and about lol. He's cool but "looks at Phone" calling me at 8:30 am is a bit too early lol. I don't even start talking to myself before 9 lol

5/2/2016 8:58:05 PM
I'm not sleep yet... This is your fault!

5/2/2016 8:36:19 PM
I drank a tea to help me rest and relax... I'm very relaxed like almost too relaxed but not sleep. I'm laying here and I have a desire to be owned and taken... I miss being taken so bad right now. Not the title of taken but the act of being taken... Sigh and if you're taken it's hot but to be taken by someone you belong to, there's still a mental and emotional difference. I yearn to be taken right now.

5/2/2016 6:50:51 PM
Don't subject yourself to something you wouldn't want a loved one to subject themselves to.

5/1/2016 10:57:58 PM
So i just bought more thigh highs lol maybe my screen name should have something to do with thigh highs lol

5/1/2016 9:35:21 AM
I think I've had 3 lifestyle relationships... One i use to count as my first D i don't feel i should because being around someone a few times doesn't make you theirs... But i did fall for him fast and cried like crazy, hell he was the first to take me to subspace and then leave me in subdrop without warning... Idk You may wonder why it matters... It doesn't until people ask and I don't wanna lie about that... I usually just count both 24/7s and explain the rest as potentials because the potentials weren't all bad... Hell one was a scorpio that kinda stomped on my heart "accidentally" and repeatedly as often scorpios do... But he was a good person and was pretty gentle with me when he wasn't being sadistic as scorpios often are. I just wonder what makes what a dynamic or just a failed attempt

5/1/2016 9:27:43 AM
How do you know what doesn't and does count in bdsm Is it sex is it feelings is it how long you dealt with each other? I just wonder, so share with Me When someone asks "how many lifestyle relationships have you had?" how do you count them? What about if you were living it before you knew you were living it? What if it only lasted a shirt time before you found they were full of it?

4/29/2016 7:23:38 PM
So before I find a muck to run i just realized after a discussion how long I've actually been unowned. I forgot those nights of staying home or going to bed at 10 on Friday just because my Master was tired granted we rarely did that on Friday but the point is it kinda slipped my mind. Those nights never were anything I noticed or was bothered by. So i was all "why would I stay home if you're sleep" then the epiphany of ooiih yea i did do that stuff lol. That's what you do sometimes when you're owned... It's odd, some days I feel like being owned was just yesterday but sometimes like the one that just happened it feels like so long ago. That let's me know more than my ass will need to be tuned up or modified shrugs It's kinda bittersweet bitter because it's time spent reinforcing habits and outlooks that i may have forgotten but the sweet part is the time the bond building and the new stuff to learn. Well...

4/29/2016 4:05:30 PM
I'm tired but I think this will be a weekend that I'll dip out and get into something... I've been in too long..

4/28/2016 9:33:50 PM
i haven't said much personally... so lets go in my thoughts for a sec. I'm wondering if I'd be alright without micromanagement. Some will say uh yea you've been without it a while right... Um well kinda... But still I moreso wonder in a dynamic would i be ok without it... Idk I find it odd something i once saw no desire for is almost regarded mentally as a requirement. But i guess it's not a requirement. Micro has two sides the ooo he controls my life side and the ufff i wish he'd give me freedom but im still turned on side. But when i think of 24/7 M/s live in (which um I didn't think I'd be thinking about but annnywhooi) i kinda ask myself would micro be too much. I also ask myself if live in 247 is something I'd be ready for again like sooner than later. Don't get me wrong I wanna serve but live in 247 M/s.... It's not a quick decision. I chopped a section cause i needed to digress so anyway Right now all I'm picturing is bite marks on my neck and a dick against my ass entrance... That would probably put me to sleep I'm not sure because it's been so long since anything has been in my ass, and yes i do mean anything...

4/28/2016 8:46:05 PM
Muckrunner would be a cute screen name for me lol unless you're in the country then that's just nasty i know i know one week in the sticks and i think I'm daisy duke lol

4/28/2016 8:40:50 PM
So i now own thigh highs.... I know I'm late, don't judge me and while we're speaking of late i didnt deepthroat until.... Nevermind Hehe but i was early on... Nevermind again. A few doms told me they found them hot, sexy, etc but i never found myself motivated enough until recently so a few days ago I got em. I'm not sure how I feel about them yet. Pics might get posted, but idk some people say they get jealous but i am not convinced lol and when I'm not convinced i tend to run a muck. One of the few joys of being unowned the ability to run a muck

4/28/2016 6:55:55 AM
The whole being shared thing... I'm cool regardless but some people take not being shared very major. Others take being shared very major. For me... I kinda know a dom super serious about sexually sharing so i thought it over and agreed if i became his I'd obey... Guess what happened? Before we hit that point he decided he wouldn't want to share me. I was cool with that too . I've also been on the other side where I wanted that freedom not really for the sex but still. Right now i think either way I'd still be cool... It would be cool to experience different guys i guess but at the same time I like the feeling of knowing your owner wants you to only be his, but i think some girls forget men have the same right to change as we do... I say that because some girls actually walk away because a man expresses or doesn't express desire to share her. I know how scary something new can be. I also know how scary someone wanting you for only them but screwing the world can be. At the same time what if he's perfect for you in the chemistry kinda way but just dies or doesn't want to share you? Are you walking away? I get it, I would have said yes a while back and in certain situations I'd still walk but not just citing i don't or do wanna be shared. It'll be a reason.

4/27/2016 10:12:43 PM
It's raining i feel the breeze I'm so craving love making with s&m thrown in... I'm planning on behaving but um... Uffff Anyone can give you a fuck i guess, almost anyone can share Sex, but love making With s&m lol doesn't come as easy. Mmmmmm i love it..

4/27/2016 8:37:24 AM
My neck is bigger than I thought lol... Oh well the more to choke right?

4/27/2016 6:44:08 AM
Good morning See I'm being all nice and acknowledging that someone might be reading this. I once heard someone say "if you're asking someone for something you're admitting or assuming that they have it to give" my advice: that might not be a good plan of action until they make you aware of it with action. Would you ask a singer to play hockey knowing nothing about that talent or skill being in them? You might, just to challenge them just based on what you see or think, but that's not always advantageous. In D/s people often ask what i expect... In the beginning i feel expecting nothing or little is good. Theres things I'd like but expectations come after the person or people show me from their own actions or occasionally words, what i can expect, but i rarely let words stand on their own. I've noticed this helps greatly on being disappointed. It also helps greatly in reducing the odds of people feeling they failed you. As the bond grows i may expect more or the bond doesn't grow. So that's my take on it expectations. You may wonder, how do we know if there's possibility if they're not told what i expect. My needs are still made clear, but someone telling me their needs are way different than them resting them on my shoulders expecting me to fulfill them. I might share my needs or it might be easy to notice if they will or won't be fulfilled without sharing them. Depends on the person, everyone is different. Have the best day of your life!

4/26/2016 11:20:40 PM
Sometimes when people doubt you there's a reason for that... Are you going to sit there wondering why or make greatness occur regardless?

4/26/2016 11:15:35 PM
Sometimes people take a minute to grow on you. Sometimes you let people tell you they'll change but other times life lets people show each other they've not necessarily changed but improved. That excites me. Doesn't it excite you? To see progression in the person someone is and they see it in you... Not by superficial things that can get ruined but by their mindset and actions. Kinda cool, right? Sometimes in life you end up saying it's better to have loved and lost... Other times you end up feeling you are the wind beneath my wings... Ayeee guys i have a question... Why when I get super bitchy or serious i get the "you ok" messages but then when I'm all super positive and mushy i get the "you ok" messages? It feels nice that people actually kinda maybe care but hehe it's like regardless which end I'm on some people think it's strange lol. I could always be numb lol

4/26/2016 10:56:26 PM
No one is better than you This is not a race We are all on our own paths I have love for you people

4/26/2016 10:54:34 PM
I should be sleep but I keep thinking of a voice calling me defiant... I am so not defiant... NO NO NO!!!! hehehe sweet defiance maybe? Lol

4/26/2016 5:22:18 PM
Lol masterdaddy30 just called me the N word simply because i didn't want to go to a chat as soon as he messaged me. Lol I'm sooo glad I didn't waste my time

4/26/2016 10:05:37 AM
Right now whatever fears seem pointless. I kind of rather just take a chance... So that's how it goes sometimes

4/26/2016 7:57:06 AM
The profile annsky is fake just Google Ann hester scam The scam is super old why do scammers think we're stupid

4/25/2016 5:04:47 AM
Just because something doesn't happen the way you feel it should, does not mean it shouldn't happen. Just because a D/s relationship doesn't look like others you've had doesn't mean it's strange or wrong. Just because it took a minute to build consistency doesn't mean, you'll be abandoned. It may mean that but not necessarily. It could mean you blossomed or they grew. It could mean timing sucked but now is ticking fine. Things are possible whether they appear to be or not.

4/24/2016 7:15:23 AM
So if there's any unowned subs that read this or slaves and your open to poly... Preferably in the south or willing to relocate in the near future swing me a message. I may know a great d type for you. Strict, stable, under 50 over 30. Reach out for more information. Requirements No drug use besides light smoking or drinking Parent of no more than 2 Desire to please The most common limits are fine Anal and throat fucking a plus but all that will be discussed later.

4/24/2016 6:59:53 AM
I once saw a post that said find bae and shut the h up... So um... Not much to say lol. Semester is almost over.

4/23/2016 7:30:28 AM
I no like Disney all the much Dreamworks has a movie called tros coming out in November, I'm going to see it.

4/21/2016 7:06:51 AM
Folks allow me to express something THIS IS THE INTERNET lol For me personally I don't do online which means NO control will be given via it LOL if control is given or power exchanged it will come from us both knowing each other well enough to do so... If that means something bad to you oh well

4/20/2016 1:03:39 PM
Ya know what... I feel disappointed in myself sometimes when I read a long message, go to the profile and realize I'm not his type so..., To make a doms life easier, after reading my profile, a simple hi or are you interested is cool... That way I don't waste your timr and if i am I'll hit your profile and respond with conversation or a no but thanks. I think this approach os a lot more respectful to d types but if i respond and we both have mutual interest i would desire mutual effort. Just my take. Pops collar It's a far cry from "i won't respond unless you send more than a sentence" lol. I also find the copy paste annoying so if i see it most likely I'm not interested

4/20/2016 8:35:07 AM
Some say labels aren't important. Sometimes they aren't but I've had issues as a result of men saying they were gay but really being bi... Saying they were sub but really being dom. Saying they were dom and craved control but really being controlled by women in their world. I just realized why some say they aren't important... Because they don't mean anything. Until the person's consistent actions express or define the label it's just a word... Dang that's an epiphany I know i know really simple but i was about to say people shouldn't mislabel when they aren't able to stand flat footed on it, when in actuality i ended up realizing labels are just wprds until you open the lid.

4/20/2016 8:06:04 AM
Getting your life together before starting something... Some s types rather finish school or have a banging career before starting a dynamic.... I don't know... I could say you have to finish raising kids before starting a dynamic but it's still just my opinion... I don't feel studying would disrupt me from Service, it actually could help the bond if the M is a good fit. One visit with a Lifestyler i didn't have to be told or pushed to study, his home was just an environment conducive to my educational application in my opinion, but him coming by swatting my behind or asking me what my essay was on really helped. It's on thing that made the visit special besides him having a chase that fit my body perfectly lol. Oddly in the end my education was used as an excuse not to continue. We both had our reasons but i doubt school had anything to do with it... I digress... That illustration was simply to show that sometimes life goals can bring you closer not rip you apart. As for Status the same could be said "don't jump into this until your relationships are in order" well I've been on both sides of that and I do feel this lifestyle shouldn't be entered unless things are somewhat peaceful in whatever other relationships you have, but you make the choices in your life

4/20/2016 7:33:56 AM
Every day I spend here is a pause in the journey... It was once said to me and I do understand it. I think i get why some s types have play partners. Without them, everytime you start a new relationship you start from the beginning in certain areas like oral training, pain processing, anal training etc. So now I shall ponder if a play partner is a good thing just to stay current and get better... I'd really rather not but at least I finally see an advantage to it.

4/20/2016 6:10:13 AM
In the beginning i look at it like we are both just people learning each other so... Making any rules or requirements or expectations without mutual effort is your choice but it won't fly with me. Shrugs I believe in reciprocity. I also believe certain rules or requirements aren't effective and actually push the s type away. Let her do her unless you own her or have met and are considering her. That's just my opinion

4/19/2016 2:54:14 PM
And again I cum lol This egg remote thingy is quite nice on the clit lol... But i no wanna break anything so I'll quit. Lol

4/19/2016 1:27:52 PM
A daddy dom is easy to find So many great men everywhere It's a lovely time for love and compatibility I'm ready for love again I really am And I'm ready for mutual love I'm ready for loyalty And it's so obtainable.

4/19/2016 12:36:56 PM
Do you ever cum everywhere and sit there like "sooo why'd i have to cum everywhere" lol Sex is easier cause then you're cumming on a dick but if you're just messing around you cum like well everywhere I'm not complaining i haven't cum like that since like Ummm a long time lol... Now I had gatorade and either I'll be energized or go to take a nap lol.

4/19/2016 7:14:59 AM
Sooooo the possibility of being or having a 3 hole slut doesn't give you tingles? Oh but it should hehehe.

4/18/2016 5:27:15 PM
Visualization... Is... the... Key 
Followed... by... Action

4/18/2016 11:12:16 AM
So planning trips... Wish me luck... This summer should be great, at the very least I'm getting to visit places I've never been. Might come out of it with a loyal loving slightly sadistic D or M type. Hehehe

4/17/2016 3:15:57 PM
All this pretty weather without a Master is kinda depressing... Yes I've been enjoying it and the plants and hookah but sheesh... I think it's time to start mingling with nillas to pass the time again lol. Today I actually thought for a second of not being a babygirl for a minute then something was like you are what you are kid lol.

4/17/2016 2:06:44 PM
Tip: when a D type says "I'm not like the other doms" um lol that's EXACTLY what the other doms try saying lol so it actually makes you just like all the others... Show you're different with action

4/17/2016 12:02:33 PM
I'll be your cheerleader as long as I look good in the skirt lol

4/17/2016 10:24:11 AM
My name is maybeher abd i like flats... Yes i have new wedges and a few pairs of heels but while unowned i like flats and if they freak you out or keep a guy from approaching me oh well. The Master i end up with will love that I'm short and then stick me in heels lol

4/17/2016 10:20:39 AM
One good thing about being unattached, you don't have to frustrate yourself over changes someone makes or if they're being honest about them lol. My associates make changes I'm just like cool if that makes you happy. I don't concern myself with the how or why or the after... My mind is light

4/17/2016 10:11:59 AM
Tip: for those still rocking sideways pics on here... Turn your phone sideways then upload the pic Tah dah Or todah if you wanna get hebrew about it lol

4/17/2016 8:48:53 AM
I just went through bunches of pages of messages to realize I had some slip by me lol... So the new mail thing was just sitting there all red and stuff... I figured out for some D types even female ones it's a lot easier to complain about the fakes than to accept the ones they feel are genuine.

4/16/2016 2:24:54 PM
Why do people say you have to want the same thing in M/s like that's it?? I've wanted the same things You can share the same dreams you can talk forever about nothing and travel the US together and still doesn't mean it'll work... There's more to M/s than being completely compatible and in sync... God I wish there wasn't sometimes but there so is

4/13/2016 4:42:09 PM
So a message from today. Again I get messages of those pushing one TWUE way lol. "Birolorus says after reading your entire profile I found a small problem you aren't a slave even with your alttitude of writing & what you think about the future while a slave can pick their Master what happens next is the master wish point so I suggest you change to Submissive unless you don't know the difference" To me, and to one of my mentors (a slave who has been doing this decades) one of the main differences in a slave to sub is how a slave thinks. After i belong i can comply or say goodbye, it's that simple. Was I allowed to discuss yes. But no negotiating (for me) and no wiggle room unless given. It's that simple. Some feel my selective vibe makes me not a slave. Some feel me sounding off makes me not a slave. Some feel me not kneeling to men who won't put their foot down at home makes me not slave... Guess what? That's absolutely fine It's your opinion I have mine I know who I am. I see guys i don't feel are doms but i dont waste precious time telling them that if they aren't bothering me. As for the future... Did I say anything in my profile about the future. Actually I said I quit worrying so much about it lol. Whatever I write right now is written as an UNOWNED slave lol. So when I'm owned by a strong Master and if i still write the same things then by all means go bonkers. Until then I'll add it to the pile of "you aren't a slave" hehehe

4/10/2016 8:28:47 PM
Need me because you're better with me, want me because your sadist loves to hit me. Trust me because you'll know no other will get me. Crave me before juices flow as your manhood splits me. I'll need you because you give me freedom, I'll want you because you keep my inner slave creaming, my intellectual side thinking, my babygirl pleading, and my masochist that i deny consistently screaming. We both will need want and crave each other as the bond deepens. If it's ever asked, we live it, no need for scening. We both simply bask in this union, hearts beaming.

4/10/2016 8:17:18 PM
I guess I'll try and rest. It wasn't a bad weekend. I just wish I was sharing it with a dominant soulmate not just friends fam or platonic dom friends. I came twice today and didn't enjoy it. Lol please don't message me about that unless you know me well enough to understand what that really means. This guy messaged me on that other site about wanting to teach me to be a bimbo and telling me how men love clueless vulnerable women... Sigh i was polite and declined. I get he sends that message to many people but... I've been completely vulnerable before so I don't need to be reminded of that. And now I'm crying lol I haven't cried in a while. It just made me kinda sad because... No just because you're vulnerable, loyal, submissive, etc does not mean he will love you. In fact in my experience it means he will love those who are the TOTAL freaking opposite of what he claims to want. They might get an ego stroke from vulnerability but they don't need it. Lol yea i let a stranger make me shed tears but only a few like 2 mins I'm ok now. To the slaves... It's easier to find a master or D if you need to be wanted instead of wanting to be needed and if you actually have being needed or a comstant as a mutual main requirement i think you might be screwed lol but we can't be alone there's gotta be others. Shrugs and hugs pillow

4/10/2016 4:58:13 PM
Brisk evening, walk in the park, salted caramel hot chocolate, mmm now all I need are cuddles and a thriller film.

4/10/2016 9:35:48 AM
Tip: unless conversations are going super well ya might wanna try not going to chat feature super fast. Some do without even knowing what i am interested in. I'm like why make the extra effort if we could be total opposites. No i don't wanna message forever. There's a few guys here who have my number to reach me, but to at least figure out if there's even a reason to invest time, it's easier and more efficient to keep it on here. That's how I feel about it. A few D friends of mine get curious why the girl stops talking but they only swapped two messages here before he asked her chat name. I'm like that might be why. Heck sometimes it comes out she's only a bot. I don't know i just think there's no harm in swapping a few messages or letting her offer a mode of communication. Even with pics. It irritates me majorly when guys ask for pics after I've sent a face pic already because let's face it most guys here don't have a lot of pics and if they do it's rare they are recent VERY VERY rare that the pics are from the past 6 mths. But ooooh they want to see.... Again let her offer. I get wanting to see a full length pic, but i ask.... Do you posses one? Did you offer one? If not you're starting off already expecting something for nothing. I guess it works because so many do it but not for me. I often hear "men are visual, you girls like taking pics". Ok that's close minded because sometimes we women are visual too. That's an assumption because some of us find it tiring, annoying, uncomfortable, and pointless to take pics for someone we don't belong to. I'm not really what I call visual but i am a hopeless romantic and there are no heart flutters at all in hearing "send me a pic" heck I'd even appreciate a "would you send me a pic?" one is a command the other is a request. No it's not "just" semantics lol. For me it shows in a relationship he would meet me halfway in effort. Now if i belong it's different.... I gradually become comfortable enough to send pics and the man gradually becomes confident enough to know his girl wants to see him too. Plus even then a pic is an addition if we've met but if we haven't shrugs i just don't get it. So i said all that stuff to say, pic collevtors need not contact.

4/9/2016 7:26:28 PM
When he finds me I'm going to be so totally like https://youtu.be/3WH1Ma50QUk

4/9/2016 6:41:54 PM
Soooo i guess some of the poetry lines ya gotta know me to get.... One was about the past one was about the trials of entertaining potentials That's all guys...

4/9/2016 8:55:19 AM
People borrowing coffee traditions Instead i just get suspicious Make your own habits with me Where's the passion if you hit me Expecting my submission From arrogance good riddance I'm sick of this empty position It's empty cause of slim Pickens I'm picky regarding one's intentions With my heart Is that so wrong You look sharp That won't stay long Let's get dirty Let me clean If you'll hurt me by cane's sting Will you alert me for misbehaving Pantyless skirt me to access me I'm lost in the jumble Low self esteem no just humble What's my dream What do I think That I could love you When you're seen I'm sure I'll want you Show you believe, in return I'll trust you Thia whole thing has been rough to Get through I mean I really would love to Belong But how long Shall I ask and answer My own requests for permission Is my total submission That hard to acquire Is there no one wishin' For love

4/9/2016 8:54:11 AM
The hand on my throat Mine clinging to his coat The slap to my face The way his palm tastes The whimper he recieves As he thrusts inside of me I miss it and I guess memories Never leave My knees My tears My hopes My fears Were once his Hard after years To forget things so clear Tough to not compare The good that was there The bad outweighed If i stayed Nothing would have changed I know because I prayed Many nights and days That a moment for him to say His truth would raise Rarely it occurred I'd question if i was worth The effort The actions Speak louder than any words If diesel passes my ear Slightly startling to hear Happiness and sadness are both brought near The sun and the rain were ours to share It was us

4/7/2016 11:05:38 PM
and this is the point where I climb in bed and contemplate resuming intermingling with nillas 

4/7/2016 10:01:21 PM
Where's my DADDY!!!!
Gimmie gimmie gimmie!
Where's my Master???
Bring him now!
Stomps around being bratty and blowing raspberries
And NO! blowing raspberries isn't something kinky!!!
If he doesn't appear soon I'm going to do like those people on that other site that threaten to leave forever lol
And now we return to my gilmore girls when I totally should be resting 


4/7/2016 6:10:54 PM
SCREAMS I've got an ouchie on my wrist ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh 

4/3/2016 5:14:11 PM
If a girl comes to you with a little problem changing the subject to something naughty just seems like you don't care. So I was thinking of going under consideration cause someone I was talking to asked, but I guess it's just clear online or committing without meeting isn't my thing. I know the concern is the girl not getting snatched up by another or in my case obeying another, but if you're sliding in my life there's little to no room for another. As for the obeying part... That's not my fault, micromanagement is a very very powerful thing and even after you are without it and make your own choices you still cling to it. If someone who is interested in me doesn't offer that extent of control, shrugs that's cool, I have a friend or two who don't mind helping with that sometimes but I know it might disturb a d types clout, again not my fault, or is it? OK OK I'm not saying if I belong to someone not into micro that I'd obey another but in the point before that belonging eh.... Who knows lol. As for ldr punishment... hitting myself as punishment is almost laughable for me if that's your thing great I'm not the one. Have I done it? Yes, but not often when I did I still had real time to pull from. If I gotta hit myself I'll keep domming myself. Why must all this be so complex? It's cool, I'm learning more about myself.

4/2/2016 1:30:59 PM
So one more thing.... Lately I've been reading other girl's journals here... I'm not ranting hey write what you want, but the amount of subs telling guys how to approach them in a ranty manner is surprising. 

Yes these guys can be rude, but do you realize the rude ones are rarely the same ones reading your journal? Do you realize saying "don't" "i refuse" "you can't" "you better not" all seems a tad demanding? I get if you're dealing with the d type and he's basically treating you like crap or disrespecting you to where you have to stand up for yourself, but um... These are people who don't matter in your life. 

They are sending messages... That's all just messages, or sometimes unwanted pics. But let's inhale, exhale, and remind ourselves "they're just messages" now if there's soemone you actually know or threats etc rant away but besides releasing steam fussing at these guys does nothing. 
Telling guys what to do if you don't know them doesn't help the decent ones feel welcome, I'm just saying. 

4/2/2016 1:11:12 PM
Believe it or not, I forget a few of you actually read this thing.... 
I think I've always forgotten people read this. Even when the post is to help. So, thanks people. Also thanks to those who encourage me to share my thoughts through the times I'm thinking of just stopping because there's no point typing to myself ya know?
Well... Today... Sigh... Today is a day... I can't really explain it. I could but I'd rather not... I'll just say lifestyle wise today is not a super easy day for me. It marks my self respect and a strength I often deny, but it also marks what I hoped for and don't have. What I was told I could expect and what I can't. So that's how that is. 
In other news I bought a couple dresses I love. Odd when you don't have anyone in mind when buying them, but I'll get use to it and they'll come in handy for meets. 
As for the associate... I really wish we could just be friends and leave it there but oh well... So leaning back is taking place because I have to be fair. 
I have math to work on, a Masters draft to finish going over, and my nails to do and paperwork to go over. I guess I'll get to it. 
Where's Mr.Right on a lovely spring day? Well this morning I chatted on the phone with a super sexy could be mr rightnow but noooooooo I must be all emotional and big on connections etc... The dude looked like fricking montel williams before the ms, bangs head on table. I just didn't get any sort of spark wasn't looking for one but still lol. If you were talking to an arianna grande twin wouldn't you be spark hopeful? lol
no dom vibe, no daddy vibe, no vibe at all... What's funny? The site we started talking on thinks we're pretty compatible lol. 

3/31/2016 5:00:28 PM
One slave expressed a feeling of "can't leave". I have felt that way twice... Once was a few mths ago trying to just let things flow but the dynamic just automatically kicking in anyway. Another time was a few years back feeling literally ill from requesting release. Granted those feeling they can't leave didn't have the issues i did thrown at them, but still, I get it. Do I think they're crazy? No i think it's beautiful. To physically be able and free to leave but feel you can't is amazing. It reminds me of a couple fighting and still not wanting to physically be a part. I think i called it a bit "too real". Lol I'm not saying this should be fake or play but to go through almost everything and just lay there emotionally because the M won't let you go lol that's as close to non consensual slavery as you can get without anyone getting locked up lol. I wasnt planning for all that. I hadn't thought about it much lately. In the future I'm not saying I'd want that type. Bonds like that take time. One of the slaves saying she can't leave has been with him 21 yrs. Me feeling the cnc slavery took 4 ish years and a good amount of those years had offs and ons. A key for her was knowing he valued her. A key for my having to leave things was knowing he didn't value me. I guess in short I'm saying, I'd love feeling i couldn't leave if it was because of all the great reasons it should be. I look forward to again feeling "he's not letting me go" but if that ever happens with anyone again , it'll be for all the reasons it should be. I'm mushy right? Oh well. Maybe sometimes i romanticize M/s, is that so wrong?

3/30/2016 5:18:01 PM
I saw a discussion on why many don't want 24/7
The gist was it takes effort... 
My simple take is... You have to find someone you want to deal with for long periods of time. Then the needs you both have should be able to naturally be fulfilled. Not to mention longevity and hopes for the future... Those people have to mesh... 
The other thing that's easy to forget is all the people who want 24/7 but their lives aren't conducive to it. 
Let's not even dig deeper and say Stable 24/7... 
Plus we all have different definitions of 24/7.
Do I want 247? I want peace, growth, and fulfillment. If that can be mutually received via 247 sure I'd be open to it. I promised myself there would be a contract to end off and on bs. I also promised myself once hidden things leaked out I'd get release. 
i think i got so use to the feeling of "almost" 247 that I forgot a perfectly good fit could be out there just not a 247 type. Would I still crave more? Probably. We'll fish that pond when the season comes. On the other hand I often feel the almost could be the issue... Who knows.... I feel for some reason my time is getting closer.

3/30/2016 11:39:20 AM
weeeeeeeeee spins around and pokes you yep whoever you are you just got poked! Don't mind me lol. I fewl liddle lol yup when I'm little sometimes you would think I can't spell lol I promise I don't really talk like a baby lol. I don't really mention "little" stuff on here the most you all get is babygirl but I moreso focus on my core which is M/s. 
I wan CUDDLES!!! GIMMIEE!! 
Runs around stealing evweones cuddles muahhauhauhauha. 
Ok so who is taking me to the park??
I just had coffee and a giant apple fritter for brunch amauhauhauhauhuaa. 
Come wiff me to pick out pwetty dresses for spwing eeeee!!! 
Sigh my online fashion consultant isn't feeling well so I not gonna bother him wiff it, booooo. Plus he'd probably make me buy heels cause when we met he picked on me for being short. grrrrrr but me no care me thinks me looks rockidy in flats. Me likes being short lol. I'm probably gonna delete this because then I won't seem all serious and what not but oh must I be serious all the time? Isn't that a Master's job or something? 
My legs are all super smooth and no hands are on them boooo.  Grabs your hands, washes them and puts them on my thighs. Yaaaaaaaaaaayyyyy

3/29/2016 8:06:51 PM
So I finished my studying and I attempted the clit rubbing but it annoyed me so I quit lol... So I shall make my tea and fold some clothes, and text anyone who feels like texting lol... I am kinda use to talking to my associate before bed but again I'm thinking creating distance will help, so I shall. 

3/29/2016 1:20:11 PM
lol I wanna be naughty right now, but I know this would totally be a micromanage / orgasm control moment...

Girl: Daddy
Dom: no slut
Girl: i didn't even say anything yet
Dom: ok you're right, what is it sweetheart
Girl: daddy may I play with myself for a minute or suck your dick or something pleasee
Dom: no slut finish your studying
Girl: pouts, cries, rolls eyes
Dom: slaps her and yells and don't cum
girl: wonders if that was really supposed to make her not cum 
Dom: opens book and helps her study rubbing her clit after every section she completes

lol no the above has never ever ever occurred but a girl can dream right? 

So back to reality... No DD which means, I'm going to go rub my clit which I really dislike doing and then I'll study lol. Oh the joys of being unowned rolls eyes but heck with all the doms being so far away even if I were owned this would probably still be an issue 

3/29/2016 12:40:17 PM
No More Locked Doors  After this I'll get on my studying... If I had a D it would be the other way around but I don't so haha! 
So the associate that doesn't want to be one and I discussed things. I was really really clear... Um this dude isn't trying to hear anything I'm saying... So right now I feel like I don't know. I was clear and in the past I might not be as clear about not feeling a connection as I should be but this time I was trying to be a big girl and make it so no one feels jerked around... He said he understood, but I'm still going to be his. I'm like uh no wait it doesn't go like that... I feel close to him because he reminds me of the type of guys I grew up with, but I'm not what he needs and I don't feel any submission coming about when we talk. But oh do we talk... I think that's part of the problem so I'm going to lean back on talking so much... 
I also know if the right one(s) pop up him having interest in me would be an issue so I'm trying now to be clear even though there's no potentials. 
Even when I was taken I'd sometimes get in trouble for not being clear because I didn't want to hurt a guys feelings. This time I did the right thing and it didn't fall on open ears. It kinda feels like trying to close a door but the person on the other side has his foot in it. 
It's not flattering like some might think... I'm not sure how I feel about it. 
It's a situation where I want to curl in a Daddy's arms just for comfort. 

His persistence for me is something I'd love if I had that type of connection with him. I've had relationships where I wished the person didn't treat me so disposable or wasn't so quick to give up, but I know myself and I just don't feel it. 

If you're still reading here comes the advice... If you share long messages with someone, don't do it for long. Go to the next step so you won't waste time and you can see if the connection is really there. Sometimes typing and talking are very different. As time goes on I realize how the flow online is very different from over phone or talking. So if you wait weeks you've invested a lot of time to perhaps end up let down. 
I'm not saying give submission or dominance quickly, I'm simply saying once you feel a connection go to the next step. 

Remember in science class the: question, hypothesis, procedure, data, conclusion? My suggestion is to follow a somewhat similar outline with potentials. Question: Will this person be a good fit for me. Hypothesis: this person might possess the qualities I seek. (by chatting or messaging) Procedure: figure out the best way to go forward for you both and agree on it. Data: Phone, cam, meets, knowing more about them. Conclusion: this person isn't (or is) a good fit.  Sometimes midway through it you realize the hypothesis or question has to be changed or the whole thing needs to end because of new data. 
It's funny because once someone told me "I was doing an experiment by dealing with a black sub" my irritation was you should tell people that they're being used as an experiment before conducting such lol. I still believe that. I am not saying it's an experiment, I'm just saying grade school science class layed out a pretty cool simple outline for dealing with potentials. 
That is all for now. My head hurts lol. 

Another way I know I'm not his type, I sat there eating cheese ravioli while talking to him. Some may say "he didn't know if you didn't tell him" to that I say, It takes an attentive Master to handle me... 


3/28/2016 9:34:34 PM
Gets up to make tea... Sits back down and texts then remembers I'm in my carrie bradshaw mode
So after this odd day I realized another of my few needs in a Daddy Dom, maybe not a Master but definitely in a DD... He has to be able to calm and soothe me... That doesn't mean I expect him to fix anything, but at least help me calm and feel better about it. 
An associate of mine was who I turned to today and I ended up getting irritated by the end of it... 
I think that's going to be almost as hard to find in a man as transparency lol but I know that type of emotional support is obtainable.
turns off tea and gets ready to climb in bed and text my associate who has no desire to be an associate Shrugs

3/28/2016 10:27:17 AM
Certain things are hard to get over. For me, it's hard when I'm not given clarity. Today I heard from someone i care a lot about. So much to where they happen to be the last d type i did anything with... I had to protect my own emotions and feelings because when dealing with scorpios i can't trust them to look out for my heart. It was difficult because i wasn't expecting to hear from them nor was i expecting all the past feelings to resurface. We'd been cool for a few years and oddly they'd appear whenever a past partner would ditch me. Today I had to be a big girl and look out for myself. It was difficult, and while looking out for myself didn't give me any clarity, it did give me the realization that our dealings are done. We have our memories more good than bad and maybe that was our purpose in each others life. I wish we could have stayed friends but the way things transpired just left me feeling worse than the situation he always appeared after. If location was different i probably would have responded differently, but to clear things it needed a face to face and not a mandatory 2 flight to get there type. I guess again it's a low of needing real time.

3/27/2016 10:51:30 PM
There's a good amount of things I probably can't do. I can however assist and obey... I miss doing things like that. That's a lie. I miss doing it for someone i belong to. It's just different doing things when you belong to someone. I know i can belong in two seconds if i want in general but i know if i tell just some decent dom i want to be theirs it won't make me owned... It won't... What would make me owned is my desire to please and their control over my mind being so strong that I'd only want two choices... I miss it.

3/27/2016 6:12:42 PM
People talk about being better than they were... This time last year I was really confused, really stressed, really sad inside, really feeling dirty, unimportant, undesired, unloved, unappreciated, disrespected, and unattached.... Those feelings are a part of life but to have all those feelings at once is really difficult and draining. The only one or two i have left are unattached because i no have a M/s partner, and a little sad... So i guess that's improvement right?

3/27/2016 5:59:42 PM
Why is being a girl's trusted friend so bad? Sigh... Is she supposed ignore feeling like a friend? Is she supposed to walk away because she gets a pal vibe? I'm just kinda confused... I have been friend zoned before and I either embrace it or walk away... I wouldn't try getting a position the person said we wouldn't fit in. If a girl tells you, you deserve a different girl and definitely more attractive girl, why not take her advice? I'm not going to lie, I have a type... That type is intellectual, gentle, radiates dominance, and has a warm vibe. How do i know that's my type? Because it describes those I've served, loved, or been seriously interested in. I don't care if he's wealthy or not, degreed or not, high iq or not, dresses fancy or not... I care about the care, the character, the control.

3/26/2016 2:58:18 PM
Just getting back to msgs sorry people. I'm actually surprised i had some messages waiting for me...

3/24/2016 6:01:07 PM
just saw a couple on here where both partners looked presentable... Notice I didn't say unattractive or attractive because people can't help that and looks aren't everything (they hapen to both be in my opinion very nice looking), but for some reason it's hard to see on here both partners physically appearing to be clean and friendly like they may actually Want a second... Kudos to them

3/23/2016 9:14:48 PM
That conversation went well... Hopefully it'll end up a good connection even if nothing special... I'm kinda thinking of going away again.. I know some are like "you just came back" but that was only a week or so and the more I talk to people (from this site specifically) the more I realize, although I stand by my decision to end dealing with the games, that type of M/s DDbg combo may not be obtained again. I think it's why I held on so long because I really had faith it could be successful with transparency and respect but once i realize I'm beating a dead horse I do the right thing for everyone involved. I rather be uncomfy but have peace without the right person than to have what I want but us both constantly stressed or unhappy because of extra drama...  
Meanwhile, the missing of the bond, or wanting something similar in the positive ways doesn't stop. 
Even though I left looking alone and am just making myself available, that in itself can still be draining. 
Like tonight... I wish I could have just had a Master/daddy to celebrate with and cuddle, and maybe my reward could be trying out my paddle that I still have yet to have used on me or just some quality time and deepthroat practice, but I'm still keeping the faith, sooner or later...

3/23/2016 5:20:08 PM
Another section of math I won't have to see again... I'm going to treat myself, any suggestions? I got fam coming in the weekend I so wish I was vanishing lol. 

3/23/2016 10:58:44 AM
Today is a brand new day... Each day is a new day lol. 
I'm just excited about the weather getting nicer so I can wake up and run. I haven't been running in a while. I'm also excited about grilling out. I'm really excited about finding the right spot, the search isn't going bad. I still have that feeling that once I pick a place the right D type will appear but if so oh well lol we will work it out. I'm going to stop saying the right D type will appear because it's like I'm saying the few I talk aren't the right one and who knows... 

3/22/2016 9:12:26 PM
This life to me is important... sacred... special... beautiful sometimes even.
Call me juvenile or whatever but this life is about organically forming bonds, not getting each other to do what you want them to do. When things are based on manipulation they will fail... They just will... My submission comes from my desire to please, my desire to please comes from the aura of the person I serve. Not them manipulating me to do what they want me to do. I have been manipulated... There was nothing nice or genuine about it. There was no mutual gratification within it. There was no need at all for it. I can fill your needs, you can fill mine... Without us manipulating each other. Me manipulating a man is not necessary. If I'm doing that, I'm not happy.
Tell me your needs... I'll tell you mine.... Tell me your wants, I'll put mine aside to make yours happen if that's what it takes. 
When a slave or sub is manipulative it is called topping from the bottom 
when a dom or master is manipulative it is called playing games... 
My opinion doesn't make it fact... But neither does anyone else's and I do not care how long they've been in the lifestyle.
Thinking it's about manipulation is straight up VANILLA. 
In my personal opinion.

3/22/2016 4:56:01 PM
WHAT is a slave?  A sub asked that in her journal on here because she sees herself as a sub but men are telling her she's a slave... Ok for starters, many doms will tell you you're a slave because they want you to be one lol. They will also tell you that because newbies take it as a serious compliment. Very few d types will tell you that because they see how you think and feel based on how you think are a slave. 

Next... The sub vs slave is an ongoing debate but to me personally and to one of my lifestyle resources who has been in this for about 30yrs (not saying that means anything but anywho) it's not like one is better than the other, it's more about how you think not what you do. It's not about if you like decisions being made for you. It's not about if you can learn to deep throat while he drives down the road. It's not about how well you can take a punishment or kneel or how good you look in a corset. It's about how you think. In my opinion after the slave belongs to the Master she has one choice most of the time, obey or release... While a sub may or may not have one or more choices... Also a slaves mind just naturally responds to control from the person she serves... The thing some seem to miss is the part that says AFTER the slave belongs. 

For me, I realized I was someone's slave after I did something I said I would NOT do. No it wasn't sexual. Like I literally told him from the beginning "I'm not doing this" and I did it because it came to a point where his happiness, his pleasure, outweighed my comfort, my nervousness, and even... my safety... I put all my trust in him and allowed his pleasure to outweigh my wants and I had the faith that he'd feed the need I had, to serve. Me as a sub would have said "I informed you from the beginning I was not doing this and you said it was ok can't we find someone else" Me as a sub would have said "It's not even fair for you to put me in this position to do something dangerous to make you happy"... Me as a slave thought about it... And said... "I'm so freaking scared Sir... I'm soooo freaking scared, but if this is what it takes to make you happy, I'll try it. I'll trust you." 

To some it may seem little... But to me it meant a lot and back then he seemed like it meant the world. 
I'm not sure if that explains the difference in my opinion, but it's the best I have. 
Again it's not like a sub or slave is better, they just are different.
Think to yourself and you will be able to point out moments where you simply obeyed or walked away... If so... Maybe they're right, maybe you're a slave. 
We still make mistakes, we still deserve respect, we still have bad days or attitudes, but at the end of the day the Master is our focus throughout.

3/22/2016 9:08:11 AM
So I usually do NOT put peoples screen names out... Like I really seriously frown upon it but this takes the cake... The guy I was feeling like a bitch for saying I wasn't compatible with (MasterBlackMale) sends me a message today saying "I sent one of your pics to my friends and he says you're a guy so that's why you weren't interested or wanted to move slow". Blank face... The cockiness it takes to think just because a girl isn't into you that she's a man is just crazy... Meanwhile, on the topic of pics, the pic on his profile is from 2012 and he currently looks nothing like on his more recent facebook pics. I mean he looks NOTHING like that at freaking all. I am not judging those with mental problems but stuff like this makes me want to just never deal with anyone who has mental situations. Him saying that was so juvenile... It was like back in the day when a guy would say "you're a guy cause you won't show me your pussy" lol seriously dude. 
I didn't even break it down that I wasn't interested in a mean way but I still have the messages and right after I say I'm not his type, I'm a guy right? LMAO. 
In addition to that, he claims he has had a sub but the vibe I get is he's feeling around, he wants to be bossy but is clueless of the time it takes to really invest in an actual M/s relationship. Heck I even took the time to proofread his "contract" that he seemed to think was legally binding LMAO when I told him a slave contract was not he tried to skip the topic... He's also the person who most recently said I'm more sub than slave simply because I had no desire to tell him the things I did with my past Master or had no desire to talk about walking around him naked when we have NEVER EVEN MET he tried that on our first day talking...  I still let it slide... So am I mad? No but a bit irritated. And while he's busy sending one pic to his friend and female who wants to see what he looks like now lol let me know cause clearly he wants to hide it. Now I could add pics on here of my pussy to prove something... But I was trained better than that... I was raised better than that... and if he had any sense he'd know there's already pics rolling around that show my nookie to prove he is totally lying. 
Not to mention anyone I've dealt with in the past might not say amazing things about me but I'm pretty sure they'll verify I'm not nor have I ever been a guy and if he had gotten to the point that he wanted to get to he'd know that. 
The one major way beyond a pussy pic (because science is crazy now) is the fact that men acting like women can't have a girl time... If he was my Master he'd know it because that can not be simulated... Don't go throw him any heat but just be careful with people on this site. He also works in computers so I wouldn't put it past him trying to send my phone a virus or something. 
Be careful girls


3/21/2016 7:46:24 PM
I feel like such a bitch... I realized... again... I wasn't the one for someone... It sucks... Although it was totally clear they didn't read my profile really I get it's kinda long. I thought hm we seem to have a common goal, let's talk... Sigh... If personalities clash early on and you're putting more effort into holding back who you are so you won't annoy each other, to me that makes it clear that it's not a fit. It's not about not giving it a chance... I get irritated when people say that... The chance begins once we start any form of communication... I was honest to save us both time and frustration but I feel like a b for that honesty.
On the other hand I found out today an associate of mine is a scorpio... what does that mean? it means... good sex (but I'm not trying to go there) it also means good cuddles (I'm not trying to go there either). It also means easy conversations I asked the dude 50 million questions in typing lol only scorpios bring that out in me. But also scorpios cause a lot of hurt and pain in their tracks with me... So do I cut ties now before I end up hopping a flight to Mass? lol aye don't judge me, I said I was waiting for the right one to find me but as soon as he's found me I'm proactive ya dig? 
Plus I've only met one d type this year... I need to be more friendly. But again I'm not trying to get hurt.. So while we're associates I should run right? right!

3/21/2016 6:33:21 PM
Lions and tigers and... cupcakes!

3/20/2016 4:57:46 PM
"You're more a sub than a slave" If I had a nickle for every time someone who has never met me told me that... I'd like a bunches of dollars. Does it hit a nerve? Sometimes it still does, because I know everything I went through to finally admit that I am a slave so when someone says the opposite and they don't even know me I kinda get a bit bothered but then I brush it off. Why? Because they aren't me and they have a right to their opinion. I simply explain, especially if we just started communicating, I don't just put me out there as "your slave"...  I'm not going to apologize for that. 
If I was yours after 1 day or 1 week of talking, do you realize how quick or easy someone else could get me? In the past I do feel I was obtained easily... Meanwhile if he didn't get his way (at least in the beginning) he didn't try insulting me by saying "you're not a slave". He also didn't expect my submission until time around me... 
I'm not saying you have to be people of the past. I'm saying, things take time and if people were more focused on letting it flow than telling me what I am and aren't I'd probably be owned by now. 
I'll even be helpful. Men use to ask how to get me or what it takes to own me. I didn't really know how to put it into words at first. Then when I did, I tried sharing it on here but it vanished so I took it as a sign of it not being good to share back then. Now I shall try again. 
This is what it took at least to get my attention and start something... 
Show your personality or that you are unique, that catches my attention. Avoid being so dom that you are above admitting errors. Spend time getting to know me and at least (acting interested) in who I am and how I function, in other words, allow us to learn each other. Have a unique but attractive voice (I know a person can't help their voice, but I'm big on voices). Last be not least, transparency and patience... The transparency was always missing with anyone I belonged to as a slave but if it is there, I know I'd stay owned until the person no longer wanted me. 
So there you have it. What gets my focus (not saying that you desire my focus, but if you do) and also how I look at the whole "you're a sub because I didn't get my way? comment.

3/19/2016 7:33:41 PM
I don't know why, but tonight... I miss my stuffie... He was wiff me through a lot of stuff. He didn't care if I was cold or sick. He gave me snuggles even when I was in twouble... I have another one and other ones, but it's not the same... I miss him.
I feel liddle and men keep laughing at me... I just wish one understood, but all they are doing is laughing at my liddle voice and being mean to me, or saying naughty things and it's NOT nice *stomps around*. 

3/18/2016 11:01:03 PM
Sometimes we set limits for ourselves, sometimes we set limits for others... Sometimes we set a limit thinking it means something or proves a point when it really hasn't or doesn't. Sometimes certain limits can keep you from something or someone possibly amazing, and for what? Just to be able to say you didn't do it. Sometimes that's not enough. When it's not enough, you should remove that limit or allow it to be pushed. Just food for thought for others and myself. 

3/18/2016 10:41:14 PM
To those keeping me company messaging on here, thanks a lot. I'm here studying and in between breaks, actual decent conversations are helping me to stay awake and not give up on this stuff. So it's truly appreciated. 

3/18/2016 6:13:08 PM
so an associate was like "i don't control a girls eating unless it's necessary" why do d types ask of your experience and then try taking shots at it? Lol what brought it on? I went grocery shopping... I'm hungry... I'm probably not going to eat because i can't decide what i want to eat. But nooo my meals were controlled and it was COMPLETELY unnecessary... Eye roll. Not to mention the "you're petite why would your meals be controlled" there's a number of reasons Lol.

3/18/2016 2:07:41 PM
How did you feel when you got your first tat? I wasn't going to do it, but oddly a new associate encouraged me. He got a tat of his ex and even though it's over and he's over her he got it because of the story behind it. He's the first d type who didn't try pushing me away from getting it. Now I just gotta draw it up and see if he's gonna be a Twue friend and hold my hand through it...

3/18/2016 7:23:29 AM
I was made use to being called slut, in good and bad ways. Now a friend desensitized me to being called a bitch (still doesn't mean I'm cool with random people using it). So now I'm wondering what else there is... A meanie reminded me, I'm also use to brat and cunt never really annoyed me much to begin with...

3/17/2016 6:21:40 PM
https://youtu.be/qD9_hnDJiGA

3/17/2016 1:23:07 PM
Promotions are beautiful nightmares...

3/17/2016 10:44:18 AM
It's almost officially spring. Every babygirl deserves a daddy in the spring time. Every daddy deserves a babygirl in the spring time. Even the a holes and b's. Because it's pwetty outside and breezy and there's fairs and shows and festivals... So everybody go find your body somebody.

3/16/2016 2:51:28 PM
she opened the door for it lol So the dom friend is getting set to walk his dog... Her: whines "why come you never take me outside?" He: doesn't skip a beat and says "cause you won't put the collar on" Rofl

3/5/2016 8:05:28 AM
So many people are against people getting back together. I'm not... What I'm against is whoever caused the breakup or made the situation be drama to begin with not stepping up, especially if it could be solved easily. That's when i don't get it. So if you didn't put the relationship in a bad situation or you didn't do anything to cause the break up whether you asked for it or not, then I feel you should carry on with your life, don't chase behind the person. If they are the one who caused the craziness to begin with then it's on them to pursue you, and if they don't i don't care how much you love them don't give them forever to come to a sensible conclusion and fess up. Time is too precious to be wasted. You two or three could be busy making memories and if you aren't because of bs then you both were never meant to be to begin with. I'm going to lean back on this journal, but if you have any topics I'll touch on them for you. Still not 100% better but getting there.

3/3/2016 6:50:52 PM
I know some chicks who are all about money will run behind the sub positions i just passed on today... That's ok... sometimes I don't like having a conscience, other times it's what makes me, me. I get 1950's but my 1950's didn't come from tv and had NADA to do with submission. I get being a kept woman, but why be kept by someone who doesn't really care to ask how you are before they go on about their lovely: career, house, etc? Why be kept when you can pour your heart out and they're still going to be the way they are even though they know it's not the best they could be? I... Just... No! No I rather be unowned and crave a D type and even open up to just not searching, but having friends to cuddle, than to be with someone just for them to provide or because it's familiar. (yea one of the offers came from a very familiar source and I occasionally miss him and will ALWAYS miss his glorious freaking tongue ha mer cy) i digress. The other from a stranger on here lol. I get we all have our points... I have my points where certain things outweigh other things. Heck, i had to have my slave side needing trust and transparency to battle my babygirl side needing comfort and to feel safe. The longevity side won, the babygirl side will get over it or fade into the background (again lol) but we also all have those easy "if i were anybody else I'd jump at this but I'm me" type choices. It's what makes us, individuals. In my opinion. So no need to sway 6 or 7 figures in my face. If you got it, great! But it won't get me. I serve from the heart not the pocketbook lol. My shoe fetish hates me for that lol.

3/3/2016 6:28:54 PM
Why would a "Daddy" want to inflict pain on His babygirl? I saw the above in a journal... Just an opinion here's mine based on experience... He'd want to inflict pain to be her first... To teach her to crave it, embrace it, shed tears as he tastes them. To scoop her up after and have another chance to be proud. To bring her closer to him as she cries out loud. To simply bask in a new bond found S/m. To leave a mark so deep even if she tries to replace him it won't be the same. To slap her just right and send shivers down her spine. To choke her a certain way and without words say "slut you're mine" It's not just about hitting for every sadist. It's control, it's connecting, it's teaching, it's trust. People would say why do you look at him like that and only you two know it's because you trust him to do ANY THING to you. That's coming from someone who DOESN'T see herself as a masochist, but i gladly took his pain... Unless i was pissed and proving a point but that's another story for another day lol

3/3/2016 4:19:10 PM
I've had 3 people say i was in the wrong field lol I guess nowadays there's more than one way to get to the same place so I'm in the right major according to many websites and my advisor. Who knows if I'll stick with this field but the degree oh yes.

3/3/2016 12:44:11 AM
So many D types feel motivated to follow me or do what I do. I don't see myself as a leader but even if i am, is it too much to find one who can lead me instead of do what I do whether positive or negative? Is having someone inspire me to be like them for positive reasons too much to ask for instead of me having to choose follow their example and become someone i loathe. I want to belong to someone where i follow their example and become someone i love More each day. Is that so wrong? It must be because I've never had it. I'm almost ready to just give up for a few yrs on the whole faith in finding the right d type thing. I've never considered it making sense but i think once i truly give up for a while the whole 3 hole slut, do whatever cause it doesn't matter type of thinking will finally make sense. Thank goodness I don't think any of my lifestyle friends read this there would be an intervention lol (u kinda gotta know me to know why). Hopefully I can sleep, busy day later checking out a new area.

3/3/2016 12:05:46 AM
So many of you guys wanna call a girl impolite for not typing no thanks or "not interested" or even more than that, but do you know when we do take the time to do that, we're still met with "why" or "you haven't even tried" or better yet getting cursed out??? And if we don't respond to the response to our lack of interest we are deemed: rude, bitchy, conceited, etc... Maybe some of you didn't know that. If i deal with that i can't imagine what the girls with pretty face pics up go through... Do you imagine how many "no thanks" they send? Often to copy pasters? And then how many explanations for the no thank you. If everyone let a no thank you be that it would be fine. They don't

3/2/2016 7:57:52 PM
And another FAQ nope i still don't have bunches of doms... There's a few i text one has been my friend through... Well... Almost everything lifestyle related. The few others are people I'm just starting to text with. So nope no potentials... Don't let my ranting or crushing fool ya

3/2/2016 6:51:48 PM
So the long ago potential did text... Oddly today, and I did respond as promised. I just hate text communication if I've met and "done things" with the person. It's like why text... Sigh his job is probably the reason but still... He was sweet and i did feel appreciated during our meets and he did give me patience while i sorted out my thoughts a few yrs ago, and he was the only person I ever did anything with while the ex was talking to me but that was long ago and he has a mean side so idk And now i do know... Like many here, little effort so moving on...

3/2/2016 9:07:35 AM
Sigh i might add this to my profile... But for now it's here... A little FAQ Yes, I have done raceplay BUT only in situations where i knew for a fact the person didn't mean it. So that means it would take trust. Yes, I've been kept chained and naked but the naked was more my choice lol. Again it came from trust i had been his for about 6 mths before all that, he had met my family etc. Yes, I have had hard limits broken, refer to above and no i don't feel safe sharing what those limits are. Yes, I have been a no limits slave (so saying that to me in a message doesn't scare me) again it came from trust and knowing what his limita already were and knowing he wouldn't put me in physical danger intentionally. I'm not saying these guys were perfect actually they're assholes but they're assholes who in one way or another gained my trust. I'm confident to this day that the few I've raceplayed with aren't racists and I'm confident that the one I shared all the other stuff with would always keep me physically safe. To me that means something. So many girls want a master to be faithful with his dick lol i don't even expect nilla men to be faithful in that way. With me, be clear be transparent be faithful with your heart and to my heart and I'm good. As for my post last night... Thank you to my friend for the air hugs. If you're reading this sends back virtual bagels. And i also had a friend rush in with a story... I never had a story messaged to me that wasn't for editing lol so that was sweet. I am feeling a bit better.

3/1/2016 9:08:27 PM
My heart hurts literally not figuratively and it's raining and i can't feel my left foot and I'm sick of thinking about houses and apartments lol. Everyones life is settled and established where they are and I want to go where I'm happy. I blocked a long ago potential's recent texts but if he pops up anytime soon I'm responding because i need warm familiar arms that want me right now. We weren't each others top rated cuddle people but we both said we were the runner up. Lol i need to snuggle, and suckle, and soothe... I'm gonna take ibuprofen and go to sleep but I too hot and if i use to get too hot my before daddy gaved me cold water and put Windows down and take covers Off... Grrrr life is cruel So i opened the window, took some medicine, and now I will try resting my head is pounding. One class ended last night I forgot a section of assignment but i still passed.

3/1/2016 6:28:53 PM
From a site where a girl blogged a day in the life of pms... I only snagged the part that I don't think men get lol 8:45 am: Why haven?t I heard from my boyfriend yet this morning? He never texts me ?good morning.? He?s not romantic. He doesn?t love me. He doesn?t even like me. OMG, we?re falling apart. We have to break up before it gets worse. I?ll never find anyone else. How do I start over? 8:48 am: Aw! There he is. OMG, he?s so sweet and caring and thoughtful. I love him. Everything posted at 8:45am was everything she was thinking in the same fricking minute lol. So ya for some girls it really IS that serious Think I'm lying i can link ya to the article lol she continues it through a whole day lol Ijs

3/1/2016 2:28:33 PM
Yes I'm also going the vanilla route but i figured I'd search here too... I have some money saved, and money coming in to cover myself for a spell (nah I'm not talking taxes lol) so if you live in Atlanta GA / Columbus, Oh or Omaha, NE, and would like a roommate let's talk for a few weeks (I'm not in a rush) and then do a meet or two and see if it works. I'm not trying to belong to the person I room with. Not mixing it but it would be cool to have a lifestyle friendly roommate. Not seeking to be a housegirl or to live with a couple at all. Just ready to go somewhere new. I've been twiddling my thumbs about this for years off and on waiting for others to make a move, not waiting now. Also if you're a trucker i would be open to riding after I'm settled in a in a new state, but only if we click. I know it's lonely out there but I'm in no place of desperation or urgency and you shouldn't be either. Feel free to message me.

3/1/2016 10:34:32 AM
I wish my Daddy would call and make me get out of bed and get all nice and ready to go wash his car and then have fun in this lovely weather Problem is... No daddy... And any potential is too far to arrive after the call lol sigh I sad

3/1/2016 9:58:07 AM
TIP: don't torture yourself by being in groups that no longer apply to you. Lol i peaked in a cnc group and the example she used just had to be anal... Facepalm... So i could leave it all together or just not look in until it applies to me again lol I'm not even going to think about the darker topics... Lol I guess I'll ask you journal people... Or if you're reading this no matter who you are... What is your view on cnc? Have you or would you ever have it as a relationship basis? Can it be negative?

2/29/2016 11:37:56 PM
I don't feel you have to hate your past before enjoying a present or having a better future. I appreciate the past for what it is.

2/29/2016 10:38:18 PM
A former has literally walked across the street because i was afraid to cross it alone Taken me by my hand to public restrooms Cut my meat Made me get off the phone at bedtime And checked my hair for flyaways or flakes yes i said flakes lol I say all that because last night lol it's technically morning now, I was called independent. I disagreed, because i felt it wasn't true. Am I a freethinker? Yes Will i get things done for others? Usually Can i take charge naturally when necessary? Yep but i dont see myself as independent, especially when i have a master / daddy i trust. When i don't have one i think people mistake my: determination, tenacity, promptness, efficience, and energy, for independence... I was told I should have just taken the compliment. I told him i couldn't. In all honesty, I don't see myself as an independent person. People say they're independent if they do things on their own. To me it's independence if you can do everything on your and enjoy it. I can do most things on my own, some i enjoy some i don't, I even get uncomfy with this new way of swiping the chipped cards lol. I think it's another reason why I still feel i fit in my areas of the lifestyle. Some DDs or M types aren't annoyed or bothered by a girl who can't decide what to eat so she doesn't, or doesn't like going in the back alone at the Drs, or doesn't wanna talk to waiters or the guy at the adult store counter, or stuff like that. That annoys nilla guys. It's not to say i can't do all that stuff. I can, and for others i often do. I guess it sounds lazy or stupid... Idk... I'm ok with however it sounds because ya know what? It's true, and I rather offer him the transparency than to let him inhale his own smoke from my booty. A waitress once told a M i was with "Aw she looks to you for a lot, she's so shy and bashful, you like keeping her that way huh?" i was too busy trying to hide to even really think about it... Often times d types are ready or eager to alter my "shyness" i think his response was: a pause, a smile, and a nod. So if me admitting a flaw or bonus (depending on how you see it) is the way to have someone who is ok "keeping me this way" then so be it.

2/29/2016 11:23:47 AM
69 degrees who is going to enjoy this lovely day with me?

2/29/2016 10:51:04 AM
My friend told me I should have been born a taurus... Lol cause she feels they're stubborn i don't think she's that stubborn and my rising sign is Taurus lol just not my sun sign

2/29/2016 10:06:05 AM
Me and switch men... I find many lifestyle men suck at compartmentalizing so if they're a switch in lifestyle or vanilla it's going to bleed over and blend somehow and when the submission blends i just... It just ruins a lot for me. When i say submission i don't mean being loving or caring i mean them obeying a woman or doing things to make her content without anything in return. If you can't compartmentalize switching is still possible but that's when being transparent is even more necessary. Even when i hear doms/dommes say they're going to play to get it over with or were made to do something (outside of work or laws, of course) it kinda does something to my mind and my tummy and uck. It's just not bearable for me. So i guess if i dealt with a switch they'd need to either be great at compartmentalizing and not bring their sub life into their dom life (agter being upfront about the double life) or they'd need to have such a level of strength in their dominance "with me" to where nothing was seen as hidden or immature and just be clear about who they were. If it's that strong i won't care about them subbing as long as it doesn't impact us but often it is sooo obvious and i just can't. What inspired this? A few things... A switch messaged me and got me to thinking, and personal experience where a man had to alter his behavior to keep a D type woman happy but forgot to be transparent and let me know why the behavior with me changed (so again bleeding over). If i lack so another (who isn't making you happy can be happy i rather not especially when you lost the little strength to explain it to me) so there you have lack of compartmentalizing and bleeding over as a result, which leads to instability, which leads to a weak foundation, which leads to stuff fall down and go B O O M. So switches or those having double lives this is why. Now if you have good transparency skills, and ability to compartmentalize, and still put your foot down in your sub life (which even i can do when pushed lol) then we can look at some possibilities if you're into me, but trust me I realize how uncommon that is.

2/29/2016 9:51:33 AM
Ewwww I'm sorry but I'm one girl who can't get with HWC or BBC. An average size or slightly above average is just fine so if you're longer than 10 and wider than both my hands holding it, ufff it's even annoying to suck it. So please don't try impressing me with that, I'm not a size queen. I like a dick i can deep throat, not use every technique i was trained in or taught myself just to suck it in a comfy position sheesh. I'm way more interested in you getting my mind but if it's outrageously big Nuh uh.

2/28/2016 9:19:12 PM
I remember why I was seeking one daddy and one dom when i first put my profile on here in 2012 (i deleted the first). I desired one of each because i expect different things from a daddy than a dom. All daddies aren't doms, all doms aren't sadists, and all sadists definitely aren't doms or daddies (trust me I met one he had the potential to be all 3 but in my little opinion he was solely a sadist and there's nothing wrong with that, besides the fact he put himself out as a master. The thing i think now when I read "master" on a profile isn't their training or skill but to whom) A friend of mine and I were messaging about a week ago about our ex masters. If many would have read our discussion they would have said "masters don't do that" but still to us, we saw them at one point or another for one reason or another as our masters. In my opinion what made them masters was our belief in them owning us. Our faith in their capabilities even when their actions didn't show it, but i digress... I expected a daddy to stay! To give longevity. To not mislead me. To protect my heart before his ego. I know lifestyle daddies are different but the one thing I thought would be the same is no matter what they are still your daddy and loyal to that title. (Spme people confuse loyalty and fidelity lol they aren't the same but I'm not opening that can). Ya know the stupid phrase doms come and go but daddies are forever? I believed it. It's bs, but i believed it, I wanted it, I needed it, and now I am reminded of why I had it so specific. It was to avoid.... To avoid... Sigh... Exactly what ended up happening lol. What does that have to do with today? I let someone be my everything... Every D role and vanilla. It wasn't a smart decision at all and trust me I take full responsibility for being a stupid, ignorant, shy, faithful, optimistic, idiotic, hopeless romantic and I'll do my best not to repeat the display of most of those adjectives, but i do know it can be done. One man cannot be my everything but if i see him a certain way the man can fill every position. Just because the timing was off for what or who wasn't a fit in the past, doesn't mean a better timed forever fit is impossible this time. The thing is I still don't expect a dom to be forever and now... I don't know if i expect a daddy to be forever, and ya know what? *smiles* that's ok because if things end up with a daddy dom being forever, it'll be a great surprise! So yes, I'm open to maybe one day having one be everything, but I'm also again, open to one of each.

2/28/2016 7:06:14 PM
I have on my slippers and my new powder pink sleep shirt with leopard lips on it! Now I just want a daddy of my own for cuddles... And maybe other stuff lol. For the next two weeks if im still around lol (tomorrow isn't promised) I'd just want a daddy to myself (if you knew me you'd know how strange that is) I'd wish for no wives, no greedy / evil parents, no kids, no mysterious subs in hiding to bother me or wonder about, just him for about 2 weeks. The one Daddy i know who has that to offer, is a bit too cocky and married to his career lol. Sometimes I wonder if the amazing tongue is enough to make up for that but everything that tongue fixed, the cockiness from his mouth ruined. So, I ranted, I'll curl up in a ball and watch something and pout a tad tonight, I made an account on a very very naughty site, lol and I'll get over it.

2/28/2016 5:09:50 PM
Short leash: such foul language i declare lol

2/28/2016 3:59:47 PM
I'm thinking about doing massages to keep my hands strong. Haven't rubbed a lifestyle man's body since November lol, it's starting to get to me. As for a nilla eh just shoulders doesn't really count. So if you're near might have to set something up.

2/27/2016 11:47:56 PM
If you know anything about Omaha Nebraska or Columbus Ohio please swing me a message, I'd love to chat with you. These are two locations both near to my heart for different reasons besides being deemed most affordable cities lol i loved Nebraska before learning that. I am pretty nervous just thinking of moving to a place all alone. It's not like moving where you have a dom or family... It's just you going and doing you. If i do this I'll be afraid maybe, but I'll just do it afraid. Fear is only paralyzing if you allow it to be.

2/27/2016 9:54:04 PM
Quote from fuller house: there are some people that love each other but aren't meant to live together. I had to accept that reality as a young one, some never will. Shrugs

2/27/2016 7:24:36 PM
The way doms go on and on about pics but I'm seeing doms with pics 1+ yrs old lol i think my math class is more interesting than CS these days. Then they wanna request pics without even sending the same they're asking for. That's how a girl spots a lazy dom lol. Just want want want lol yea it's M/s or D/s but we are supposed to get something out of this too guys. Lol sigh bangs head Its sickening just fucking sickening Besides that I had a lively lovely fun day

2/27/2016 3:29:41 PM
Mozzarella sticks Mmmm I only ate two... This self dom stuff is an art form. I ate at this place with a school bus in it lol

2/26/2016 7:33:59 PM
If i ever question being bi i look at Lori Loughlin and mmmmmmmmm ooooo Mmmmm ggggg so fricking sexy. I'd lick every part on that goddess

2/26/2016 3:31:58 PM
Lol tried posting the answer I use to say i didn't have "how to get me" then it vanished on my phone lol i guess i wasn't meant to divulge.

2/26/2016 12:53:44 PM
Ciaa weekend ayeeeee tickets are like dirt cheap, i feel like I should go but watching bball is not my thing. What do you guys think? I know I have assignments to complete but eh...

2/26/2016 4:52:48 AM
Wakes up dances around, I've been up since 6:30 and how is your morning going? Smiles

2/25/2016 8:50:34 PM
This whole bedtime thing is going to take more effort than I thought. I had tea at 9 to help me sleep and I'm just getting drowsy lol. 11:49 shooting for 12 or before

2/25/2016 11:20:15 AM
You CAN want more fir someone than they want for themselves but, what good is that? Why see an amazing life of happiness for someone if they aren't ready to reach for it. Use your time wisely readers.

2/25/2016 11:14:36 AM
Sometimes consistently depending on someone cripples you. I rather struggle alone in regular life and dom myself in lifestyle than to be with someone who can only keep me because I'm afraid or they make me afraid that I'll fail. If I'm in your life I'm going to LIFT YOU UP not drag you down or turn on you. If i can't lift you up and we motivate each other because you won't let me or let others drag you down because you hear their voice louder than mine, I'll evict myself from your life. This is the year of productivity.

2/25/2016 8:36:05 AM
The thing about doms saying they rather experienced or older subs / slaves, it doesn't make sense because a lot of doms are playing games and the newer or younger girls might not notice it and if they do they haven't been through the let downs from doms yet so they have the energy to tolerate it. If you aren't ready or genuine it's probably better to go for the younger newer Subs. Less questions, less noticing stuff, and less "struggle" unless she's just a brat lol. Onto other news... Attached just from texting me??? Wth???? We never even discussed anything real. He asked a few lifestyle questions and now is attached?? Either it's a load of booboo or there's some issues so let me figure out how to get out of this one... I'm not saying I never got attached to someone via teXT. It actually happened recently but it was because texting the person is fun we had imaginary breakfast together, and he picked out stuff for me buy that i needed to get for myself, we gave each other advice, talked about family, so i looked forward to our texting. That's different than asking a few lifestyle questions and deeming yourself attached... Shrugs at least to me it is.

2/25/2016 8:16:17 AM
The good thing about lots of real time is knowing someone maybe better than you know Yourself. The bad thing about a lot of real time is knowing someone better than you know Yourself lol. Shrugs go figure

2/24/2016 11:08:21 PM
I was super good tonight. No flirting, just chatted with my friend on the phone and did some homework for class, and hopefully made a new connection with someone i hope to learn about. Well i guess it's my bedtime. Yesterday I didn't go until approx 4am and i haven't had a daddy giving me a bedtime since about 2012 lol. Instead of spreading submission around and asking for one from my friend I'm giving myself one gradually. I was doing well nodding off about 12 ish so I'm going to get myself familiar with that again. I have studying to handle later today and homes to look at. This might be the last year I'm open to relocating because waiting for the right person to come or stay lol doesn't seem to work and the way some people get baby fever, i have house fever lol. So we shall see. I think I'm just nervous that as soon as I move the right fit will appear but i guess I'll have to hope we could work through the distance, i kinda like having space sometimes anyway. I use to look at properties and automatically think about my former and if it would be enough space for him etc. The past year has been a reality check in so many ways and i now just look at properties thinking logically not fantasy. Whoever i belong to whether I buy or rent you will have a catnapper or a killer lay z boy to relax in. My b day is near. My first daddy comes to mind... On my 23rd birthday or 24th lol he took me to Galveston. It was nice i loved it, but we slept in separate beds... I knew this man since I was a teen but he didn't wanna sleep next to me. I woke up to a lovely sunrise no Cuddles. I haven't ever shared my bday with a man besides him (in real time) and it slightly bothers me. This year, I want to enjoy it or ignore it... If i enjoy it i want to enjoy it, like really, enjoy it. That means no guilt, no shame, no terrible thoughts or feeling less than. Many of you have read my openness to married guys, but around my bday i don't want any of the worry or self esteem hit that comes from all that. I'd just wanna be peaceful, happy, and cherished, and maybe spanked lol. I don't see that as too much to ask for.

2/24/2016 9:06:57 PM
Something cool i saw in class today... Times like that distance sucks because there wasn't a local daddy i could show it to and the one local that I'd be into that says he's interested doesn't even have time to sign on here. Sigh oh well.

2/24/2016 12:52:10 PM
What areas of service are my favorite? That's what I was asked... Well it depends on the man. One sadist gave an amazing response to receiving oral so naturally it was my favorite to do with him. A Master seemed pleased when i took his pain or massaged his body so naturally it became my favorite ways to serve. Another loved when I'd write him poems, so that's what he got. A daddy liked when I'd edit and assist him in his teaching plans and care for his feet, so that was my favorite. It depends on the man and his response to the area of service. Many talk about domestic servitude, but i have never met a man or Master that was appreciative of that... Wait, that's a lie one did appreciate me cooking and cleaning for him during our short time of pre consideration. The smile he gave when I'd bring his food to the table or even suggest somewhere for him to eat (because back then i was too shy to eat in front) he always seemed grateful. One day I was in the kitchen washing dishes and as he sat in the dining room eating i can remember thinking to myself "i could get use to this". That's when my mind goes back to thinking poly because no one is an island, but different strengths from different people can make things amazing. The domestic service guy could have been exactly that but we had no sexual passion or chemistry so someone to fill that and every other area would have been great. I thought of him today because one thing I didn't appreciate was him popping up unannounced but actually if things aren't 100% with a master and i, i think it would comfort me to know that he'll jump in his car and be at my door to fix it. The fixing part he wasn't great with but the initiative... If i have that from a lifestyle mate it will be appreciated, because i know how it feels to feel the person just really doesn't care and it's better to hear or see them and know they care, than to read words on a screen and know they don't.

2/24/2016 10:57:09 AM
If you matter to someone and they're just texting to you lol either someone is there that matters more or you don't matter to them much.

2/24/2016 9:44:20 AM
Looking at a girl's profile a lot of times doesn't let her know you're interested. Frankly, I end up thinking the man is bored so he just clicks it over and over.

2/24/2016 12:22:00 AM
I don't get married people doing the whole "leaving thing" but guys and girls I'm gonna help you out frpm someone who thank goodness didn't end up married... 5 ways to know their ass isn't really leaving ROFL but seriously here's how i know 1. They pack after a fight / argument / blowout / disagreement (that's anger, hurt, and pain lol not being done with you) 2. They make sure to pack up in front of you. Lol (they aren't packing they're giving your ass a chance to come to your senses) if they're really leaving they'll do it when you're gone. Why make a big soap opera about it lol some love drama) 3. DEAD GIVEAWAY they get a regular hotel ( lol when people leave for real they move in with adult children or other relatives or a rooming house, even extended stay lol. They don't go to a regular hotel. That's not leaving that's blowing off steam lol) 4. They take their house key... You leaving what you need it for? 5. They agree to get together for whatever reason (if they're leaving they don't need to eat, drink, sleep, chat, etc with you because lol they're done and leaving, right? ) 6. BONUS They have been with you +10 yrs even after you or they were unfaithful. (There is a rare occasion like the one I read about on another bdsm site where the man was strong and transparent enough to tell her he no longer loved her the same and she didn't make him happy. She was hurt but more than anything she was afraid after 20 something yrs of being a wife she'd be alone what would her purpose be? still she admitted she was only hanging on. So once in a while that happens but usually people see 10 yrs as too much of an investment) So now that I've shared those tips pleeeasee married people stop acting like you're leaving lol. Stop giving the I'm not chasing them speech and please for the love of paddles stop telling those who know better "oh you're wrong, it's over" just to add a lie to the one about leaving. Last but not least stop the bs about it being for the kids. Kids would rather happy parents that aren't together than unhappy parents that are together and if they wouldn't rather it they're selfish and should seriously seek help for such narcissistic behavior. Lately I have seen and heard a few more husbands and wives "leaving" and I'm calling it one of the worst bluffs in the world. You want stuff better GET COUNSELING, meditaye, hell if it's your thing PRAY, but stomping off cause your panties are curled lol it's juvenile and pointless and in the end just makes you look like an attention seeking drama king or queen. Then why do people do it? I'm glad you asked. They do it because IT WORKS! even with people who know better saying it's not gonna happen, it still works. So i guess it's not dumb to do what works eh? Lol In a live in relationship i "left" once came back after being asked and things only changed a tiny bit... Then I left for real Here's the kicker he must of not been paying attention because he claimed he didn't think I was really leaving... I didn't leave angry, i actually missed one flight to have more time so I'd be sure things were on good terms, i packed while he wasn't around, I was cool enough to still lay in the same bed, I voiced my issues, I left the house key. I left things he purchased even if they were for me. Heck i even cleared out a back room that we were supposed to do together. All signs pointed to a serious go. If someone does that and you really want them, do something because odds are they are NOT bluffing. I'll be honest he still had a little "one more chance time" but i wouldnt have been living with him and it was way less than the almost 2 yrs it took for a real apology. Good morning CS

2/23/2016 9:48:55 PM
Most likely I'm going to be a bit friendly with the digits, so if we click from messages don't assume I'm a fake if I ask for your number kind of soon. I'm sick of this text world so many are living in, let me HEAR you, let me feel you, I just might crave you. Plus over the phone it's pretty easy for me to see if we click or not. Texting at first is fine, but over time it is so draining and impersonal. So unless we've agreed to have solely that type of communication *shrugs* I'm not partaking in it. This is something I needed to do for me. For the married dudes, I'll make an exception if you're honest about the reason you can't talk, but again don't expect me not to look for more from someone else.

2/22/2016 8:46:37 PM
To the men who think i look young lol i have nothing on Powell9 has me beat BIG TIME!! Aye just giving credit where it's due plus the girl has incredible lips

2/22/2016 8:22:40 PM
Journal prompt For the free subs/slaves what rules do you miss and why? Doms/Masters/daddies what protocol do you miss and why? How does having it make you feel?

2/20/2016 7:35:20 PM
Sometimes you want to hope things or think things even though signs are pointing to the opposite, follow the signs. We all like to say how important communication is, to some it's more to some it's less, but early on pay attention to styles and ways of communication and take it into account before anything even takes place. A tip for everyone including myself.

2/16/2016 12:50:04 PM
How do you lose manners... Not apologize... Demand a fricking pic... Then ask to see another type of pic... And then still fix your mouth to say you aren't a dom... Fine then he's just a dick and about 2 days from meeting the block zone of my text feature. On top of that no I'm not even going to say that... 2 days only 2. It's too pretty out to be grouchy. Should have gone out to lunch but I had no clue of what to do to my hair. I'll study in a few i guess or cum whichever comes first.

2/16/2016 6:58:19 AM
Say "no thank you" If every person told every message they got no ty do you know how much time that would take? The automatic reply feature is great but besides that... Some on other sites expect it too... Sigh back in chatroom days we didn't say "no thank you" it didn't mean we were rude. It meant we were online and didn't owe the person anything. What i don't agree with is people talking stopping and not saying why. You still owe nothing but if they invested time... Come on lol

2/15/2016 9:58:24 PM
Why do some chicks do the "baby walk pose" in pics... Ya know the pose with their legs spread super far like they are ashamed that their thighs touch or something... Shrugs sometimes my thighs touch... When i workout they don't. I'm not doing a "baby walk pose" to give an optical illusion

2/15/2016 10:16:02 AM
O M g sometimes you just really need to be Controlled... Mmmmmm... It's always a want but sometimes it's a need my fucking cunt is so wet. There's an empty space that vanilla men just can't fill... They could fill between my legs right about now but I mean more than that.... Mmmmm i think im gonna fricking cry. I don't think I've ever been like this. My friends get this way and ask why I never complain or why I seem content without it... I usually say the connection and stuff but Uffff right now i just could scream... I'm so hungry for it... Sooooo hungryyyyyy... Saying you'll keep me naked isn't new to me, saying you'll take pussy if I'm yours isn't foreign. Saying you'll hit me until I cant feel an ass cheek has been done. Talk is so cheap. Get in my head, fuck it with your intellect, choke it with structure, cane it with your jealousy, leash it with transparency, clamp it with protection, massage it with gentleness and Fuck... My... Mind and it might be yours at least for a little while lol. Back to my school and personal assignments if i can focus. Today I think I finally understand a moment of needing a sick fuck... Collapses into my leather chair with my dripping wet pussy against it to be productive.

2/14/2016 8:11:37 PM
If you wanna get a girl in the mood... If john Mayer can't and Ronald isley cant and Steve perry can't just slap the hell out of her

2/14/2016 1:11:44 PM
Happy Vday people ttyl

2/13/2016 9:51:54 PM
I'm not a big bible person or anything but I have been "trained" to believe that faith without works is dead... If there's no work to back something up, I'm not believing it. I'm more likely to believe the opposite. So if we have shaky ground and ya telling me something I kinda need something to base it upon otherwise it might as well not be said. Lol my friend is dealing with this dude who demands the girls put "may i be your sub" in the message lol but it seeming like a fling is what he doesn't want... Rofl i hope he catches something and his dick falls off he's probably already been close lol it's a decent looking dic from the vid she snuck lol but still In other news i told someone they were emotionally unavailable and they said "some of them are available" giggles like they're shoes or something lol. You evil people are funny. When is poke a sadist day again?

2/13/2016 8:55:21 AM
I'm feeling mushy don't judge me.... 
 Please
Allow me to light the candles
As you wipe down the implement handles
If nillas knew, it would cause a scandal
Why? You’re you, and they can’t handle
The heat
So if you beat
My ass cheeks
They wouldn’t see
The smile in my heart, how it makes you happy
As I beg before you start as my tears begin to leak
Give you head from the heart until we drift off to sleep
Sir you are unique
Once you find me, you’ll complete
My mission
And a new one will begin
It was brought to my attention
That in this phase of my life I just sprinkle in
When I feel its right to express submission
But with you every night it’ll be why, I’m livin’
Even with lack of sight, I’ll always see your position
As above me
You grow to love me
I’ll be lucky
For now just trust me
To serve
With more than words
Promise you won’t experience hurt
By my hand maybe my words
Can get a bit curt
If they do, correction works
We’ll prove we’re both worth, the effort, for the record
I’m a flirt, but I wouldn't ever, search for extra
That’s absurd, if you’re my texture, then there’s none better
I go by feelings, you make me feel wetter
Even mid lecture
I promise to do better
You’re the bar setter
So help me rise
In return I’ll fill your insides
With a burn
Of passion
Forever yearns
So bask in
My service
I only extend if you deserve it
I make you grin? That’s on purpose
I’m not bad at gaining friends but, I need a Master
To make this life worth it
Not feeling down or suicidal just saying I’d rather live with a purpose
Could it be you?

2/12/2016 6:12:27 PM
Thanks to Asha for the company in the A. If I'd had a Master we so would have played with ya girlie but i hooked ya up right lol. Leaving tonight I guess and for the second or third (why bother counting Anymore) time without feeling the way I use to oh well... It's still home my city was calling my name even if others can't. Now to figure out what shall become of Vday and i gotta sort out Math.

2/12/2016 12:44:17 PM
People don't always know why they do what they do in life. Sometimes it's fear other times there's no reason at all to them. Right now i just feel relaxed. It's odd because in the past when things didn't make sense I'd be a mess. I guess I'm not looking for some things to make sense. I've wasted time dissecting people's actions when in the end all that i need to be clear of is my actions and the reasons for them. I'm good with that. I thought things through after a chat when i was really just feeling thrown away... Again lol I realized sometimes it's the relationship people miss or value or want, not really the person they were in the relationship with. If it were about the person it would show. Soon enough many things will show, but in the meantime I have a life to live. One day I won't be living that life only for me, but someone(s) who aren't 100% without me.

2/11/2016 7:05:51 PM
With the approaching "holiday" to the CEOs and supposed average joes amd every half decent man in between... I've told and / or shown the vibe of this song to the few I've been with to no avail... So i send it to you gents hoping your Vday is full of: love, laughter, and altruism from the one you spend it with. https://youtu.be/er074Jc5vXA Happy V Day or Single Awareness Day in my case lol

2/10/2016 8:02:33 PM
This is one of those nights when my mind has questions that will likely never get answered and what do we do on those nights? We sip and pack a bag... Sigh, such is life. I'll return to your regularly scheduled slave tomorrow lol if i live and nothing don't happen as us southerners say

2/10/2016 4:14:57 PM
Sex to me is like...
It can be glue that makes two pieces that belong together stick.
It can be like fire that burns bonds.
It can be an annoyance if it's repeatedly brought up after you told their ass you weren't really ready at that... Oops segue much? 
Sex can be so many things to so many people.
An act that can shake, break, create, forsake, and take lives
So when I hear people say "it's just sex" 
I wonder mentally... How old are they?
Now I agree sometimes a fuck is a fuck... I guess?
I agree some people you screw them and wanna leave like RIGHT AFTER...
Some people you screw and it just feels so right regardless of how wrong it probably is.. 
But just doing it for the moment? The sensation? The ooo and ahhhh... 
I want to understand and in a way I don't.
What can I say... I'm a Pisces... If you are into astrology at all...
Enough said... 

The kicker... I don't see oral sex as sex bursts into laughter
but even with that... It's not "just a blow job" I mean it means something... 
It's likely it means something simple as the person asked for something and I gave it or in rare cases maybe it means they had a pretty dick cock or member... 
But I don't really feel I'm sharing the inside of myself... I guess my mouth is myself?? Shrugs and don't judge me... I was once trained out of that thinking lol no really I was at least I think I was... Well my actions said I was but I digress...

Maybe if I could brush the inside of my vagina with peroxide and baking soda and vinegar and stuff and forget all about it unless I chose not to, I probably would see vaginal sex the same way. 
I.. just... don't... not yet...  (moreso the forgetting that makes it more comfy brushing helps though lol)

I know this is a fetish site. I'm not judging people just having sex to have sex. Some of my best friends are... bursts into laughter nah I'm not really laughing only on the inside. 

As I approach the first anniversary of my 29th birthday (think about it a minute) I question if it's a part of being an adult to not only understand (because I kinda do) but to share in the concept of fuckbuddies and all that jazz, or if it's ok for me to be me, at least in this way. 

If you like... Change my mind, but if you change it there's probably gonna be a special place in: hell, limbo, or whatever animal or thing you become in reincarnation lol  I mean c'mon: for every action...

2/9/2016 1:58:09 PM
On my laptop cleaning out and returning messages while I settle in. Giggles I just got virtually collared by a dude in Cali, I think it is amusing it was in response to my entry about collaring me just because you feel like it, I guess hehe. A person I'm getting to know made something clear to me... This journal (cause I have others lol) may make it seem as if I have a lot of guys I'm actually meeting and dealing with in real time... I do care what people think, that's not a typo I'm one of few girls willing to admit that I DO care what people think. So I want the record kinda straight at least a bit, for anyone who may possess that opinion. I haven't met one dom in person this year of 2016. That means, any writing has been past experience, my general opinion on ls situations in general, or dealings with vanillas or guys who think they're vanilla hehe. I have a VERY small amount of constant dominant figures in my circle. So I'm sorry if I gave off a vibe that wasn't quite accurate. Meanwhile, that's the thing about public journaling, you leave what you write up to the reader's interpretation... I'm literal, I read things (usually) as they are so unless you specifically write or say something a certain way I'm not going to slide my own twist on it, but thank Paul, Peter, and Luke that everyone isn't me snickers. Sips dunkin donuts coffee. I forgot how good it feels to journal from my laptop, I'm feeling all Carrie Bradshawish and what not
Sigh, my former use to fuss at me for cleaning my messages every monday... Then something happened where I needed a msg and had deleted it so now I keep some. Well there's 41 pages of messages from gosh who knows how long ago... I will handle that another day... 

2/9/2016 10:42:50 AM
Enjoy life you only have one!

2/7/2016 6:23:42 PM
If a little sees huge stuffies grabs one and walks around holding it, let her get it and don't block her little space especially if she wasn't asking you to buy it. Sheesh

2/7/2016 5:58:52 PM
I don't feel my collar will be given... It will be earned. I've always looked at it that way... Meanwhile, there is something slightly arousing about a D or M slapping on a consideration collar and saying "you ready girl?" but that's only in my mind. In real time slapping one on without being sure we both desire it could go badly lol

2/5/2016 11:04:26 AM
Only one call away is my fav song right now! Now where's my hero lol Heading to lunch it's a beautiful day!

2/5/2016 9:08:18 AM
A dude from Iowa just called me an n lol i guess that's why trump came in second

2/5/2016 9:05:31 AM
Giving up on people isn't easy... If i gotta ask you to hide your antics because i finally accept they'll NEVER stop it's giving up. I wrote a long entry but i just put it somewhere else... But I'm keeping my question... Guys if you choose to screw someone but aren't in love what's the point? If you can't be honest don't answer... i have access to enough lies. And please for goodness sake don't give me that bs about them being available. Doms often talk about wanting to corrupt... Fine give me a good answer, it'll probably corrupt me.

2/4/2016 3:15:18 PM
You're free You're tall You answer the call Of a dripping wet pussy cunt Craving smacks from your balls You slide into a rosey butt Allowing your manhood to fill all The emptiness You won't repeat lies You won't seek to break hearts You won't apologize Just enough until again your immaturity starts You'll title yourself accordingly No matter if you own 1, 2, or 3 Your focus will be their health and sanity In return they'll promise you'll be A joy to please

2/4/2016 10:27:16 AM
If it's hard and dripping i was a good girl, right? Crawling on my knees at 11 at night Strangers hear my screams from your passion filled bites I'm slapped because i creamed before begging "may i?" You give my throat a squeeze Your dick gets harder as i cry Slapped again for being a tease on some naughty lifestyle site I'm yanked onto my feet You whisper "slut be good don't fight" I feel two fingers in me then no more light A whip cracks I shake My back awaits Another to take But instead you take My ass...

2/3/2016 4:05:32 PM
The devil Is a lie!!! Hehehe dances around i just passed my math test with a 90%!!! I know it's not perfect but I passed in the midst of 3 uncomfortable, confusing painful, and frustrating text conversations and i rocked it!!! I should have turned my phone off like I've been told but i passed!!! Jacked up notes and all... Even with the professor saying "you still haven't watched the videos you need the help" haaaaa take that!!!!! I swear if i had a daddy i would FUCK EVERY PART OF HIS BODY HE'D HAVE MY CUM DRIPPING OUT OF HIS EYES LIKE AWESOME AWESOME!!!!! See this isn't just a test this test means one full class of math is GONE GONE GONE!!!!!! I'm soooo freaking happyyyyyyyy! Why am I telling total strangers because lol i frankly don't really feel like anyone in my real life cares and the one who might sigh i don't know if he cares to be nice or because he likes how i treat him lol but even he's emo with me today so shrugs. Everyone has their own life own family own stuff to handle but once I learn to count I'll be someone's stuff too lol I swear i think that sounds sweet for some reason So i told you people Signing off for a day or so to live i suppose...

2/1/2016 6:11:09 PM
The messages inquiring if I'm ok... Thank you... Um... Idk... I've been in this position before I'm just staying busy. Not being on here much helps. The last time I felt this way I ended up doing something that wasn't really me... That dude randomly texted me a few days ago as if he was my Daddy after us not talking in forever, but I was still trying to be good so i blocked it... Idk right now I'm still kinda emotional, but i haven't cried. I watched care bears last night, got my stuffie, and just entertained my inner babygirl. I'm trying to be careful about choices but without having a D person I just feel kinda uncared for. This is why I say I'm a lifestyle orphan. Getting laid was suggested... I don't have vaginal sex a lot because i do like feeling a bond... I don't know... I just want to be protected and a priority and have passion and serve someone who won't take it for granted. I miss being owned, yea but more importantly even though I was believing a lie i miss surrounding my life around someone with the goal of a future together. I miss gentleness that put me back in slave or little mode when i slipped out, So many are so rough nowadays or so quick to say or treat a sub however they want instead if just remembering what she responds to. But if the sub acts out it's bad. I don't have a person so I guess nothing i can do can be "bad" but deep deep deep down inside idk... I guess i will figure out what the next few days bring. To the few trying to be kind, thank you. I've been through worse so I'm ok just felt alone confused and unwanted but now I'm just trying to figure out the best way to handle it. I am not sure what i consider the right thing and even with associates open to deciding that for me, who to trust is tricky.

1/29/2016 5:39:44 AM
This guy said in his journal, he's looking for the woman he can't live without. I'm not sure if we'd be compatible, but the coincidence is: i wanna be the woman my D can't live without. Just seems if i click with a guy that spot is already taken or not available to take by anyone. I fucking swear if what I was led to believe I had was actually what I had found we'd be so fricking happy. We probably would breed one into this lifestyle when he retired. We'd lead munches, do demos, hold pot lucks, and just bask in what we shared. Our time apart would just bring us closer. But yea it wasn't... And usually i can ignore it and keep eyes forward but when I saw this person's entry and thought about my quest for the right fit or fits, it cut like a dagger.. How i feel today emotionally and mentally about doms and the lifestyle is a far fucking cry from the innocence, excitement, and optimism i had in summer of 2012. Sigh... Sorry for thw f bombs but it kinda really hurts. And ya'll wonder why I'm rolling around entertaining nillas... Cause when they break your heart it's something to come back But sometimes when someone can't live without a person its for dependent or fear or comfort or another not so good reason... Like the guys entry... I do want a man who can't live without me, but because of good reasons like my mind, me goofy smile, my hugs, my passion, my whatever else he deems motivational and great. I crave one who can't live without me because of the FREEDOM he feels when with me, not the trap he fears without me. I want a man who lives better because of me. Sometimes you figure things out and envy their situation until you... Just... Stop... Then start again from another angle. One day

1/28/2016 6:46:01 AM
Bad girls have fuck buddies good girls have suck buddies. Playing with myself is something I almost hate doing if no one is around or i can't hear them. It's been a week longer if you don't count the shower head for playing with myself. Meaningless sex, is something I'm convincing myself I'm not ready for. So a friend to call and suck is probably the most behaved it can get while free, but i haven't initiated any sucking. I just chill and focus on other things. Men are different, they want it if it's around or in a 60 mile radius so i guess sucking saves me from playing with myself. I wish this was a Wednesday from a while back. I'd wake at 4:50am lay there looking at my then Master sleep and his alarm would go off. I'd nudge him and watch him dissappear and lay silently until he resurfaced. Then we'd travel a bit and about this time he'd come back to bed for the second time and wrap his arms around me keeping me warm and safe. Sometimes I'd release just from that. Sometimes he'd wake up and take me. This morning I just want warm cuddles and closeness. A guy pal wants to come see me today to hang and i know things take time but it doesn't feel the same. Plus I still have a bit more work to handle and knock out. If i finish early i guess we can hang... It's just I'm feeling so emotional and kinda extra submissive so... Idk if that would be a good idea. This is one of those days if i were owned i wouldnt be allowed to go out without my Master. Not because I'd cheat or anything, but my perimeters are blurry so i just idk... I wish I had a Master/daddy today very much. Some days I'm cool other days I'm happy to be without but today ughhh. A friend suggested just letting them relax me massage etc... Idk i didn't say no cause it's not that easy today. I just wan i don't know hides under covers and pouts

1/27/2016 12:11:18 PM
For subs if you're in charge of your Master / Mistress meal plan it's a good option too! Kinda fun too cause you can surprise them with lunch if you're nowhere around. I know what's next because it just occurred to me, I couldn't do this for a friend because they're in the country so grab some gift cards to send to their phone number, yep you can now send giftcards to cell phones. Find the eateries in their area and they can have lunch on you. Lol nope. If your partner is in school grab moodle or blackboard whichever their college uses, that way you can check their grades / assignments whether you're around or not. If you aren't invasive enough to request that info just have them email you their assignment schedule page from their syllabus. You can help keep them on point and beat them oos i mean discuss things if not lol. Call me stuck up but when a sub says "they want my social passwords" my question is "how about your medical or educational passwords?" If you want me i much rather my mind and body be your focus before an ego trip off monitoring messages. Plus someone can always make another social profile you know about. The same cant be done for school or Health. Subs you wanna do it too? Cool you can easily make sure you keep your owner reminded of appointments or fill their preions, in addition to assisting with scheduling business meetings or organizing work emails and editing powerpoints or outlines. Dropbox for me is a thing of the past. Google drive is bringing people closer everyday, so check it out. I use it for class, to help friends update resumes, store presentations, design meal plans, and it saves automatically so you both can work together on things. I know this is common knowledge but how many actually do what they know they should do?

1/27/2016 6:23:36 AM
Sigh i can't be on here or the other site until i finish my studying and my quiz so i guess I'll get to it. Ttyl everyone

1/25/2016 4:43:22 PM
To the guy who just admitted to being a kinda journal stalker of mine... I'm flattered and slightly aroused lol i know i know i got issues

1/25/2016 4:25:27 PM
Nowadays when people ask about the search they claim I'm nonchalant or vague... No i just believe in find bae and STFU giggles

1/25/2016 4:07:34 PM
TIP: if a sub or dom gets upset when you ask them things or can't answer in a positive way just find someone who does. Why is that a tip? Because I hadn't thought of it much until today lol. I've struggled with it in the past and when a friend struggled with it i just thought why not ask someone else. Sometimes we have people in our lives for certain reasons but dont turn to them because we fear getting too close or pushing them away... Well if positive answers brings you too close to someone maybe that's where you should be. If genuine questions push you from someone maybe mentally you should change their position.

1/25/2016 2:41:31 PM
I'm not amazing I'm just me. Now let me go buy yoga pants and tight jeans shrugs

1/20/2016 1:44:48 PM
Uuuhhhgggg i need to be Controlled!!! Within that control i have low tolerance for clingy wives or baby mothers. They want you that bad shrugs ya don't need me, train them. Believe it or not, I kinda like being needed not in a weak way, but in a i focus on her and become better way. I want her with me if I'm sick, shot, swimming, spanking, seeking, or striving for more. Any guys need That from me lol so far no evidence of such. Im thinking of getting a tat that says needed by none and if a guy does his mark will cover it

1/15/2016 10:26:51 PM
Rolls eyes at every atl resident who didn't tell me about the lights in stn mtn park Fine i saw them anyway Stomps away

1/13/2016 6:44:42 PM
Uuuuugggghhhhhhh Freaking fairytales don't exist

1/12/2016 4:28:51 PM
Well for now a sometimes friend of mine got what he wanted. I guess if someone is in your way and suddenly they aren't it makes ya all warm and fuzzy inside... Men are sometimes very weird and i feel kinda odd about it but oh well who cares how i feel, right?

1/12/2016 7:07:08 AM
It was suggested in a msg i "come to the white side" Well who said I hadn't? My town isn't interracial friendly. Ive met (in person) 3 pretty cool Caucasian doms... One we really clicked but i was hesling from an on again off again situation and the meet sigh it was nice besides the annoying onlookers freaking every time we touched. I just couldn't deal with it and there was another girl who liked him and who I knew would move faster... So he took my advice to go for it... They had about a 6 mth relationship and ithink he was happy. It felt good that he went for it without getting offemded. He understood. So many people are still close minded to racial mixing. With the way I've been treated ny my own i do understand why some pick what they pick. But i have to be comfortable Regardless of race. Telling me to come to the white side is not a good pick up line.

1/11/2016 8:01:35 PM
You said "let me be your man..." I said you didn't extend your hand... How can you lift me up? Could we start out as friends? So we did then you landed making houses homes... Out of all the cArds i was handed you brought in a throne and said "kneel you beautiful bitch. I'll be consistent no switch. I'll rule my world and yours then we'll find you a sis. That's what you want right? Aren't you sick of lonely nights? You there in bed with him but he's really not your type and what you want is taken, and has been, basically forever" i know the points you were making were accurate, you're quite clever. So i said "yes Sir, my heart is aching, years of my life I'm wasting, the little in me cries while the slave is patiently waiting, the woman in me dies, while the brat is mischief making, attempting to force bonds because of stolen arms... While she draws on a smile to cover being harmed. You lift my chin and kiss my head. Saying "tonight you'll rest in my bed. No fucking around with vanillas, no having to wonder if I'll get jealous. I won't cause you'll behave, you'll know where your heart stays. I'll give credit you're pretty good, I can see you've been trained, now it's about time for you to be maintained, let me keep you..." I nod, you strip, my clothes and hand me a stuffie... You lay me in your bed but you decide not to fuck me... And then you...

1/11/2016 7:26:52 PM
Topic is a spinoff from my oral question thanks to a message responding to it. Never letting him do anal... Hmmm i guess i could understand... I've only done anal with two people... One it was super easy and pleasant always... Like I'd just fuck him with my ass lol and put him to sleep lol. I did it cause he said his Asian ex wife never fully let him. Im not sure why, he wasnt thick or long by any means but whatever. I rocked his bed and at 18 rocking a 37 yr olds bed was kinda hot for me. The other Was very different... I would usually beg or scream bloody murder but... I was his... He wanted a 3 hole girl he got a 3 hole girl. I can't really imagine denying him That... It hurt often at the beginning but sometimes if i was good he'd be easy... I guess lifestyle made it a different mindset for me. I'm not really sure if I'd do it with someone else... I use to always promise I wouldn't and... I haven't... But it's kinda i guess a tease to tell a guy about anal times and when he replies with do you want to or would you, he's met with a crazy stare... Or shyness... I guess it's something I have tp think on. I would just feel so guilty for it... If there's a medical reason a girl can't do it that's one thing but just because isn't a very good reason. Which segues back to oral... For some girls after a while it just... Hurts! Imagine you're still getting a bj after you already came from the way guys sound when I've tried tp keep sucking i think it's the closest I can explain. If it's someone i belong to I could probably suffer or cry through it... Heck if he's a sadist i can get off on it Mmmm sore clit the whole week oooooo Yessss... But a play partner or vanilla Nuh uh my little clit can't take all that jazz... I start crying and shaking i swear a nilla guy would probably start freaking out and a play partner has no business getting my tears... But I'm going to research training yourself to withstand oral.

1/11/2016 7:05:42 PM
What are some rituals that can make a slave feel taken a little feel loved a brat feel wrangled and the person enforcing not feel weird or odd even if they're vanilla? Lmao i ask the easiest questions don't i? The corsets... Only one fit the others were exchanged so another wait. I'll probably situate the pics for those who picked this week. Sorry for the delay

1/11/2016 3:45:44 PM
Where'd the entries go? I deleted a few... To those who have time and a way to reach me you don't really need to read this to know what's in my head... Well that's a lie... Cause I rarely share whats on my mind or heart unless I'm writing or backed up against a wall. It seems it's better if i keep it all inside because when I let it out nothing good happens. I will be using the f site and my tumblr for personal thoughts or going ons... But the f site posts will be friends only. On here i will still post questions but little to nothing will be shared about what I currently do or don't do. Shrugs the world was not made for transparency i guess. Yes to the Italy pal the kinky writings will return to cs... I hadn't had a muse but... I have some inspiration... Question: if you're addicted to eating pussy and the girl you're into isn't into it continuously and you refused to do it with another girl... What would you do? Make her suffer through it? Try training her to not be sensitive to it? Or take her advice and lick someone else? Today was the first day of class so it was different i almost forgot what the actual campus was like until today. If it's of interest hit me on kik or send me some tumblr topics

1/7/2016 8:20:28 PM
Really just because you see one revealing pic does not mean you should act juvenile and ask for more. Hoping everyone has a good weekend, this should be interesting to say the least.

1/4/2016 9:57:19 PM
I'm so craving structure and a sound spanking followed by hugs and caresses and suckling... Oh well

1/3/2016 3:50:58 PM
My middle side is OUT tired but out and sooooo craving structure, jealousy, and love making that screams domination... I can't remember the last time I touched myself and I don't plan on it... Right now i wish for a daddylike tone to growl, "keep your horny little ass in the house, I'll be there to handle you soon and you better behave. Get off the fucking net and prepare yourself for me" In other news... When a nilla guy says "i don't share" it's nice... But not the same. It just doesn't have the same dominance behind it. Moments like this I miss my first daddy before he lost his dominance... That calm selfishness lol Moments like this I miss my first master, slapping me hard for sending pics that didn't even show nudity and then rubbing my hair as i cried kneeling in front of him until he lifted me up to take me. Moments like this I feel hungry for the right one(s) to arrive. Where the hell are you Mr right(s)

1/2/2016 7:12:02 AM
To the proud sluts or people fucking multiple people... How do you do it? Like um just... How? I'm all for poly but fucking more than one person at a time, I'm just curious mentally how it goes down.

1/2/2016 7:07:07 AM
First time with your sub or dom what was it like? Happy New Year! So I'm tired my head hurts my butt is so lacking a sting. Finding it would be easy but I've only had "play without a bond" a few times. As for resolutions... It's a few lifestyle ones... One is worry less about what could happen and be a bit more open. Stop thinking people are loyal and just do what's best for me. I had promises of being suspended that went unfulfilled and needle play so i wanna make that happen. Get better at bondage, pick a little hottie to tie up for practice.

12/30/2015 1:15:29 AM
I'm just gonna have to stay brave... Sometimes life is odd but you can't let it get you down. I'm use to watching my own back, but sometimes you need a daddy and one day...

12/29/2015 3:09:22 PM
Why take meds on an empty stomach? Ummmm... Because I'm an orphan! ........ Quit looking at me like that it's the best answer I've got. .......... Does the milk shake i had for breakfast count? Oh shut up i made everyone else eat so I'm a good little slave girl

12/27/2015 11:35:09 PM
Reason #163 why being vanilla would be hard for me. It's 2:33am I'm thinking of suckling.... But trying to continue this interesting conversation

12/26/2015 6:51:32 PM
How can one camera have you kinda cute and the other have you kinda ewww lol oovoo and i lol

12/26/2015 2:09:32 PM
It's a song that says I'm ya dude even when ya got a dude lol shrugs longevity much? Giggles

12/26/2015 11:17:33 AM
It looks like summer back here in NC lol

12/24/2015 7:03:59 AM
Data is not that bad lol

12/23/2015 6:51:42 AM
fresh morning air and... there's like 3 doms on here that look like matured zach morris lol rubs hands together, remember the episode when he and lisa were a thing? lol hehehe. Anywho I hope everyone has a terrific day.

12/22/2015 9:41:05 PM
Verbally one can say they feel this or that with you and it might be cute stuff too, but at the end of the day it's about where they land and if it's somewhere they say they aren't happy, one of those isn't true... Don't be bothered, frustrated, or angry... For a few minutes, be sad, because it's not about you figuring out which is the lie. It's about them, feeling a need to lie to their self. The growth this year was tough but great and I'm not going to stop going forward. If people are meant to be in each others life they will be, but if it's more negative than positive you already know what to not focus on. Just because someone is a part of your memory doesn't mean they have a position in your present future. Things get confusing when again you try forcing fits. If i don't fit in your life, please, keep me out of it.

12/22/2015 8:35:59 PM
Enjoy the life you have you only have one unless you believe in reincarnation and then... Your ass might come back as an ant lol

12/22/2015 5:07:47 PM
It was suggested I offer my services: if you want help encouraging your wife to be your sub, fuck your brains out, fall in love with you once or again, or see a better side of you, message me. I have NO counseling certifications at all (shrugs) but i have good ideas free of charge, so use me if you like. If you aren't serious about this or will delay taking the advice I cannot help. I have been told I have wasted good advice and i no longer wish to do so, that would be ignorant / desperate of me and I'm not an ignorant / desperate person.

12/22/2015 4:39:57 PM
Never take what you have for granted. Never make something subpar when it could be submerged in love and positive memories. Never feel it's not worth your best shot. This holiday season if you have a family of your own, make it the best most memorable time you've had all year. It's not about the gifts, it's about the love and closeness. If you don't have a family of your own, hang with fam or friends or by yourself and have your own fun saying bah hum bug. But i swear if one more person tries an undue bah hum bug I'm choking them.

12/20/2015 5:01:09 PM
So I shall start by saying "I'm sorry for lying" I said I'd do a story and I didn't... Therefor it is a lie, because I said I'd do something that I failed to do. So you people forgive me? lol I hope so but if not, I forgive myself. Why? Because it was totally unintentional. So moving on the weekend, I had no expectations whatsoever. I find that works better for me. Overall, the weekend was tiring but good company, and mostly good people so I couldn't complain. I got to do something I haven't done since I lived in texas so that was pretty cool... It doesn't take a lot to enjoy stuff... 
I've had a few people pop up lately... The ones I know in real time I'm just seeing what happens but the ones solely online randomly popping back up after not having time talking about "well we're both still looking..." yea no. Just because I'm still unowned doesn't mean you get to have a do over after one or two conversations and disappearing. I don't work like that unless those conversations were truly memorable... 
So... The year is almost over... What's different about me... I can tell I'm more proactive about things than I was at the beginning of the year and I'm a lot less afraid of new people / things. Still shy? Yes, and to the guys who tell me they'll change it or whatever lol who said it's bad?? I don't feel it is.
I wrote some goals for the year and to my surprise I reached a good amount, and I did most of the goals alone... No D type holding my hand. I even did a few that weren't on the list, with a little prodding from associates. Would I rather had a D type of my own holding my hand through it and sharing memories? Of course, but you can't say exactly when you're gonna be dropped or whatever so you either stop life or you find life. I found it

The story... Let me get to about 90% feeling well and I will follow through. 

12/18/2015 2:34:23 PM
Yaaaaaaaaaaaaay Filled candy canes lol
I really need a gay guy frined... like one that's actually gay. 
I got an order today.. Just wish for a guy friend to really go through how the stuff fits and everything. I love it all (surprisingly). 
Some of it was probably purchased a bit prematurely but in the moment it just seemed cool. Oh well... Still waiting for my corsets to arrive and one more order. 
I'm probably gonna cry / pout for a few minutes and then get dressed... 

See I do take my own advice... I tell people to cry a bit and then bounce back. If you don't you'll be crying forever. Sigh, no one said taking that advice would be enjoyable lol

12/18/2015 1:18:23 PM
Consistency is key people... D's s's and in between... But surprises are cool too. Get em under good actions it'll keep them under good actions. Get em under bad actions stuff gonna be messed up lol. My bestie is off punishment, I rocked the g's, why does the government wanna run you crazy and make you wait just for a lil book to make adventures? Oh well that's on deck too... A few more things to get right then I'm good. 
To those who enjoyed the positive energy in the last entry thank you. 
To the messages I haven't responded to, if we've been chatting I totally will.
I'm planning to post a short story saturday night might be pretty late or early sunday... If ya want anything in particular thrown in let me know. Since the semester is over I have time to do some creative writing for enjoyment. Any other fun winter suggestions? Yep it'll officially be winter in a few days.... Who's keeping me warm? People on that other site picked on me for saying I needed a holiday hubby but I swear sometimes don't ya just want a mate to snuggle up to, cut an xmas tree with? Bake gingerbread for? kiss under mistletoe? And why a hubby you ask? Cause for the holidays he's your person like really your person and you both are making it enjoyable together as a family! Being a slave is great even when it isn't it is but being a slave wife is even more amazing I think... Maybe I'm just romanticizing it, but what do you expect it's the holidays lol. I know I know I can't fully complain about that because the opportunity was flung in my direction, but a dom having you for the holidays isn't the same as a holiday hubby or belonging to someone and sharing the holidays... That's on my bucket list, close but no cigar. (I don't want the technically getting married part lol)
Oh and to answer a question about 420 lol no I don't without dom pressure and pretty pipes, well that was my motivation this year lol. I hadn't done it since I was a teenager lol

sweet kisses

12/17/2015 7:36:00 PM
As the weekend approaches... We just all inhale... exhale... try new things... don't be afraid... See new possibilities.... have what some made you feel you didn't deserve... Attempt what you've never attempted... Follow, what naturally leads and may never waver... don't burden yourself... don't say what should be said to you... don't demand what should freely be given... don't pursue what has already run from you many times before... don't frustrate yourself... don't fall into the same traps... just inhale... exhale... be you... be fulfilled.. simply just be... 
:)

12/17/2015 6:21:50 PM
Candy canes with filling?
Candy canes with filling?
Candy canes  with filling?
YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

12/17/2015 5:54:42 AM

If you get irritated easily do NOT read this.... I wrote this to help others and release my irritation
So.. I wake up a few minutes ago... Check that other site (because that's what I do when I'm not accompanied). I see a post... A long dang post... You guys think my posts are long, this rant blew me out of the longwinded lake...
He's going off about girls only interested in sex or using their pussy... Or being about finding a bf... Well see here's the thing... In the past few days this man has: sent me porn I did NOT request or show interest in, he's talked a lot about sex until asked to stop, and he's admitted that he wants to be a daddy dom but is in fact looking for a play partner that his wife approves of, not to mention as many married dudes he has the "double life" thing going on because he came at me expecting me to travel to him when I'm only 2 hrs away.... A D type have driven from his exact town with the quickness, just because he "felt like seeing you". This guy can't because um.... It's too far, not for him, but for wifey... R O F L. (No issue with his wife she's actually decent to me but she runs his ass with an iron fist).
I will give credit to him... He did apologize for being overly sexual and a few days ago he did what I've waited years for some to do, and he did it without me asking. He sent me actual proof of his wife knowing of his interest in me and she was cool with it (I asked him not to only because when I met him and my current close friend it was with the thinking that she and I would share him.... Well he messes up and she walks away from him lol it was a two for one deal dude, ya snooze ya lose so there's nothing to tell because he's not ever getting anything but a friendship from me and now that possibility might be gone too)
Why might it be gone you ask... I'm sick of this!!! I am aware now, that the way many doms see themselves is drastically different from who / how they actually are. Even if you get a "my bad I'm sorry" or whatever, it still is what it still is. No change will occur. They show who they want you to see, but expect s types to come openly. Many doms wanna say "girls don't know what they want", meanwhile they'll lead you to thinking that they can give something they can't. Yea for me this scratches up scars I'm still working with, but I'm staying on topic.
This one in particular rather market himself as a daddy dom, I guess not realizing that he's a sadist, he's funny, he's a dependable, hard working, family man, but at the end of the day he is a sadistic swinger, and won't let you know that unless you figure that shit out on your own. Will he admit it when asked? Yea and again I give him credit where it's due heck it's partly the only reason we're still half way ok, but why in the heck would you write a long frickin essay, on how sexually focused and fake some wannabee subs are when your ass is acting like you can offer what you cannot? Why post about how "outraged" you are about local females going too fast, when you had the nerve just the other day to tell me I'd be in a hotel waiting when you got off work for sex. Why act like you can run me when you lay beside pussy EVERY FUCKING NIGHT and haven't succeeded at motivating her to give you any in a month or two???? It's baffling... I choose to distance myself, so that's what I'm about to do.
Advice to some: Stop bsing yourself and those who come in contact with you. Take inventory of yourself, your life, your identity within the lifestyle, call a fricking square a square, and for dominant's sake stop fussing about girls not knowing what they want when many of you know what you want in theory but not in actual life. Consider your real... real life (yes real is there twice on purpose) and then figure out what you offer and expect to receive and whether or not it's logical... After you know that, have no shame and present yourself as whatever title applies. 


12/16/2015 6:18:49 PM
where's my santa???? Cause I swear I've just been sooooo terrible... Make me naughty... Oops I mean teach me to behave... Oops I mean... I need to learn a lesson.... I mean let me lick your candy cane.... r o f l ummm well... see.... you know what I mean... Why does everything sound so naughty??

12/16/2015 5:46:30 PM
Gets back and runs around slapping people for not reminding me to get the early bird tickets... See... See... I was gonna do a drawing and everything for a free ticket... Dang you space of collars people! Ok as you see the day did not improve very much... Goes to get my tickets... Stomps away!

12/16/2015 9:48:26 AM
Off to a not good start...
It's a beautiful day in the neighborhood... would you be mine... would you be mine... This is one of those days that being a not taken little kinda sucks...  I squished my finger in the door a little (at least I didn't slam it) and didn't have anyone of mine I could turn to and whine about it. Then I asked a few d types who are supposedly interested in me to pick my breakfast. I even gave them choices, neither selected. They didn't ignore me, no but still. I figured it was a teenie weenie step in a good direction, like dipping my toe in the water. The water wasn't cold but I promise, it wasn't the right temp lol. One finally took a "guess" I mean it was with a question mark and everything lol. By then I had already had two pieces of candy... So yep that's how it's going, and it's funny because one of them I actually made some clothing purchases with them in mind (didn't tell them, but still). So if I'm trying, but a simple choice is too tough what will happen with bigger choices... 
I'm not trying to talk or type them down. Liking to have things picked doesn't show my submission, but it does show my willingness to depend or take direction... 
I have been doing ok controlling and / or directing myself, but today I was feeling a bit more open and trying to give "chances" since I'm sometimes told I don't. So that's how it went. 
Oh... The one who was (i guess) irritated about one flirting still never admitted that the online flirting was the issue. They gave me some bogus excuse, but before they were bothered by my actions they had a female who was supposed to be in the past coming to visit them (which I didn't mind if i was informed initially)... While having a problem with someone visiting me... Yea yea I know double standard... yea yea I know that's what I get for messing with scorpios but what can I say lol. I called for clarity but no response, so I'm not chasing him... I'm moving right along.
I'm going to make today a good day. 
Just a shaky start



12/14/2015 12:17:28 PM
*hides under her hoodie to keep safe from scarwy pipples that she tries to be nice to*
if a girl is going out of her comfort zone to do something u ask... isn't it at least decent to willingly call so she can hear ur voice and send one face pic so she knows what you look like? Getting backlash against that is very off putting and frankly I just lost all desire... If I had any. and if a girl actually tries to show interest in your work but u have nothing to say about it and go to talking about sex... What the hell is she supposed to do? Act interested in screwing you even though she gets NO HINT of dominance from you at all?  ok fine... See me haves so many questions... So sense it was suggested I use this thing to at least finish out the month... This is what ya get... *stomps away*

12/13/2015 9:25:25 PM
Soooo... I'm developing this fragrance, for now I'm calling it "take it rough". Notes of jasmine a few hints of amber and a few other things... I'm trying it out tonight freshly showered, but I have no idea what color or style of panties to wear with it... I'm leaning toward a burgundy lace trimmed bikini type, or a navy pokadot thong...  Help picking between the two would be quite beneficial for me or any other suggestions would be nice... I have been harassing the carts of aerie and vickys secret quite a bit the past few months but that's probably why I have trouble deciding... Thanks in advance gents.

The corsets should be arriving soon to those who assisted in my selections...  A proper thank you will grace the inboxes.

night cs

12/12/2015 3:58:40 PM
Is it bad to send sexual energy to someone who didn't really fuel it? I'm not sure... I guess if your intentions are good it's ok... It goes against what I've been taught by d types... I was often told in different ways, if they give you that feeling then what comes from it whether: desire, cumming, sex, fantasy then belongs to that d type and isn't to be shared or taken over by the s type. If it's super bad to share with the source of it and it's just depriving everyone to keep it inside, then it's ok to point it in a direcion that isn't bad for anyone right? idk

12/11/2015 2:18:34 PM
But... I have a question.... How the heck can you get bothered at someone for online activity when 1. they aren't yours and 2. you never tried to get their mind so they could be yours and 3. you did some dumb crap in REAL TIME and still have yet to make it right? lol  
Does that make sense to anyone? I swear I'm such a freaking angel until people start doing dumb stuff... You do dumb stuff then that's your way of saying you don't want my focus.... But oooooh my, the world is bad when my focus isn't around... I swear... smh... I actually told the person to check with my references so he could better understand me and how to handle me but noooooooo.... So heck you get what you get.
and then this other guy... Mr. cocky we'll call him, decides to compliment himself saying his eyes are "intense".... The heck... Um.... So I take the time to look at his eyes... I'm not even into people's eyes but I somehow always get men with intense eyes... So then I look at his... And people... The dudes eyes are brown... Not chestnut, not almond, not all the interesting colors I've had in the past like green, blue, grey, firey brown, hazel, or even big beautiful brown eyes... Just ordinary day, run of the mill, brown.... I'm not even sure of what to tell him... and why am I talking to him you ask? Because our compatibility is 85 and heck he's a scorpio... and even though they drive me crazy... Um yea that's a passionate sign. But I swear he has one more time to give himself an undue compliment and I am soooooo done!

12/8/2015 3:25:17 PM
Do i miss being owned? Of course! I've been told it seems I enjoy being free. It seems some rather i walk around sad or give myself to the next dom no matter what. No, I'm not doing that. I haven't felt what i felt when I was owned even at the beginning i just knew... I just knew i was gonna be his some how and it happened. I also knew bad stuff too but I digress. I felt what i needed to feel. When i feel that or more, i proooomise I'll submit, not a moment before. Until that happens I'm not going to be sad everyday or longing everyday. I'm going to live the best I can. With that typed i head back to the  tumblr blog world. Message me here if you like but not updating... I'll come back occassionally like I did this time. ttyl

12/8/2015 2:01:11 PM
Yep I flirt online, sometimes it's what I do / It doesn't mean you're not on my mind or that I wouldn't be faithful / It just means I like to flow / It just means I'm kinda playful / It's just means that I'll be me but when the right one(s) come I'll be grateful / 

12/8/2015 1:55:29 PM
I love my lip gloss. Come kiss me, it tingles lol

12/8/2015 1:52:46 PM
these days people don't know asking from telling... If I'm not yours, ya probably wanna stick to... will you do xyz... not telling me to do it. that crap falls on deaf ears... and nope age is no excuse we're talking guys 40 plus lol and some wonder why I'm accepting date invites from dudes in their 20's... cause the older ones act 20 anyway shrugs. I'm an equal opportunity dater... actually that's a lie lol. I'm picky but still 

12/7/2015 7:49:12 PM
dominate: VERB it's what you're doing while getting kinky
dominant: noun or adjective it's who or how you are during the kinkiness or otherwise 

You can dominate you are dominaNT

12/7/2015 7:38:44 PM
geez guys so many dick pics tonight lol as defaults yikes.... 

12/7/2015 3:20:56 PM
catch me in the chatrooms lol 

12/7/2015 3:07:20 PM
He says what the fuck are you doing?
She says: fucking around, what's it look like
ROFLMAO
ok I know the girl might be knocked out before she got the whole word "fucking" out of her mouth but... Don't knock a girl for trying.... literally don't lol

12/7/2015 2:57:11 PM
lol this is the first time that I actually see a purpose in giving a D type a password lol. I have a 10 page final to finish and what am I doing? F-ing around on that other lifestyle site. lol I so need to be locked out of my account so I can finish this. 
One of my little friends has me lock him out of his so he can get stuff done but it's always short lived so I gave up like "dude I'm not gonna do this when you ask and then have you be a dick to me just because you can't play around online until goals are reached" I get being pissed hell I'd be pissed but I'd still appreciate it... 
I tell ya, life of an orphan. 

12/7/2015 2:17:43 PM
Sweet Baby by Stanley Clarke is sooooooo dreamy lol

12/6/2015 4:24:01 PM
How many meets do you give a sub/slave to offer herself or accept your request of submission?

12/1/2015 9:35:22 PM
I... Wan... CUDDLES!!!!!! Not the virtual kind either lol goes back into her fort. So many doms seem to want a slut in the streets and just a fuck toy orrrr a lady in the streets and a freak in the sheets.... What if that's not how things went... Where's the place for innocent in the streets and slut when her Master needs? Sheesh Why doesn't Fwb work for me? Cause sex really doesn't do it for me if there's no connection and if there's no D/s my maso side won't show so no s&m so it'll just be... Fucking and chilling... Yea, let's not

11/29/2015 6:20:39 AM
Papi please take me Grab my throat and make me cry for you. If you can be true. I can show you. Exactly how i exude, submission. I've been wishin' for a gentle Master to arrive and, snatch up his position With a vengeance. I might, not look into your eyes, but my voice will get your attention. I'll be upfront, yes I'm shy It just means I'm catching feelings Not perfect but I try I'll leave you with symptoms Of being over loved, and being given blind trust Deal with me, you'll end up cocky cause I'll fall, beyond lust. Crawl for you, giving my all just to, see you smile as proof, that you're pleased. When you put me on my knees, it's where I feel most serene, until you caress my chin and uplift me. Exes couldn't hand you? Don't look back you'll just see dust For the ones who couldn't be true, who cares? There's now an us. Need a sweet one who can take use Go ahead use me, be rough Skilled in aftercare? So you scoop me up Handle me with one glare that says "be quiet, slut" Life's not always fair, maybe it can be if I'm in your clutch. Need a slave that'll: love, serve, and share her mind, body, and trust? I've been waiting this long, take your time there's no rush I'm right here... Maybe I lied... About the no rush part, there's laughter I might, actually be, currently a bit sought after After all the tears I've cried a few wanna write a new chapter But I'm going slow, taking my time. Waiting to see: natural dominance, control, and protection before I offer more than play time. I'm selective because it takes a specific kind Of Master to rule my world and direct this leash of mine It's no breeze But i repeat My goal, is to make full attempt to: cater, bring joy, and please If that's something you can feel, go right ahead and pursue me

11/25/2015 1:12:36 PM
pink and white from greekjim Electric blue and forest green from oldwolf are the choices i selected. Thanks guys Happy thanksgiving

11/25/2015 10:39:37 AM
Pick gents... Corset colors... I'm already getting black and red, i need 3 more colors. And a tip... If a chick was owned a while and she's got real time habits that aren't bad left over, just show her the way you prefer, but there's no reason to complain about it. I mean it's respectful so what's wrong?

11/25/2015 5:20:40 AM
I don't think people get it.... Sometimes I talk to doms and they do some dumb or inconsiderate stuff and I'm like if i was gonna deal with this i would have stayed where i was. Slaves don't always leave because of abuse or cheating. Not saying it is or isn't there I'm just saying that's not always the drawing card. Sometimes we leave because of lack of transparency or lack of willingness for the dom to stand up for the relationship. People don't always leave because they aren't compatible. Sometimes they leave simply because there's no longer a beneficial reason to stay. Sometimes they leave because respect has been lost. Sometimes they leave because it is time. I'm not sure why people think i left one situation where the person had my mind and everything else and then did craziness to go into other situations where the person doesn't have my mind and still does stupid crap. Lol yea no. If you wanna do dumb juvenile stuff get my mind first lol i walk away slower that way. It's amazing the crap people say about someone they never met from years ago, but in actuality they have more in common and do more craziness than the person they supposedly don't respect.

11/21/2015 7:45:29 PM
He grabbed her neck and kissed her on the lips biting her bottom lip. She moaned and tried pulling away but his teeth went deeper. He grasped her ass cheeks with his large hands. "where were you" he asked. She looked at the floor playing with her fingers. He raised her chin... "i didn't do what you..." He Squeezed her ass cheeks tighter. "i didn't do what you think... Even if i did... It doesn't matter Eddie... We're weren't..." his hands quickly moved to her neck squeezing. "don't you dare give me that we weren't together shit, slut! You already know that doesn't mean a fucking thing to me!" she gasped for air as his grip tightened. "Don't you Riley?" tears slid down her cheek. Her knees tapped against each other. Her breath was Cold in the fall night's air. She slowly nodded yes. He tightened his grip licking her tears. "I'm gonna ask one more time! Where the fuck were you?" he let go. "my friends" she mumbled... He grabbed a hand of hair and pulled her up the cold concrete stairs. He unlocked the door and drug her inside as she stumbled behind him. He thrusted a finger inside of her... Immediately removed it. "you fuck your friends now Riley?" she dropped to her knees. "please... Please... We.. You... I..." He regained her neck. "I'm not mad Riley. I can't be mad." He unzipped his jeans. Took his dick from his boxers slid into her mouth and began thrusting. "That's right baby... I'm not mad. I'm.. Just... Pissed" he said slamming deeper each time in her warm throat. "let me feel your throat and while I'm there repeat this rule. I don't fuck my friends".

11/21/2015 7:27:55 PM
When cuddles feel right whether happy or not, that's how you know it's special at least at that moment. Are you all ready for the holidays? I won't be in atlanta for thanksgiving so that should make it an easier one for me.

11/19/2015 7:49:10 PM
Last weekend of ren fest so yaaaay

11/19/2015 5:02:45 AM
Lol dude with a copy pasted message mentioning girls being about bs... Uhg riiiiight

11/7/2015 12:09:54 PM
That look when people tell you "your d type is CA RAY ZEEEE" and then you smile and say "i knoooowwww riiiiight" lol i miss that a lil bit... Where's all the half psycho possessive sweet doms, that rule their own lives?

11/7/2015 10:33:09 AM
I never find what I'm craving when i look for it... Meanwhile when I'm not looking what finds me isn't always that great either lol.

11/7/2015 9:50:10 AM
Doms do you guys ever act like dicks until you meet the girl in person? Or are you the same? I have never had someone be a dick until we met... Well yea i kinda have one time i guess i don't really remember... Girls are you ever a bitch until you meet a dom? I'm not... I can be a bit willful until I'm sure he's not lying about his life and those in it, but after that I'm good.

11/6/2015 10:40:28 AM
What should I eat for lunch?
So I ended up eating Chinese and for the ones who suggested dog food... *goofy stare* you gotta get in my head PRETTY deep to get me to do that... 
Not sure why I haven't done that before shrugs ew I'm glad lol

9/11/2015 7:23:40 AM
Morning people, it's Friday! I forgot what was so good about them but in high school I felt like they were amazing. So yeah.... I'm ready to get this weekend situated and accomplished. Just to add, the people who are subscribed, that was nice of you and thanks. Last entry.... When you touch me until there is no more When you love me until I am so sure When you fuck me until i can moan no more When you trust me like no one before Then i am sure Sure i am yours Take care everyone Catch me on the public tumblr. Im still here peaking messages just moving past this to express myself. There's enough here to get a feel if ya need one. Sweet kisses Question: how can someone so sweet and passionate and protective become such a heartless prick? Is it the same person?

9/8/2015 9:49:30 PM
Sometimes friends can make you feel more alone than strangers

9/7/2015 9:54:49 PM
Long distance to me is NOT long distance to others. Virtual cuddles, sexting, and cam sex does nothing for the most part but make me wanna scream, roll eyes, break rules, or just go out on a date. I sometimes think i should have spent more time being trained virtually instead of real time cause these doms are racking my mind expecting SPANK to really do something for me. The word spank makes me want to be spanked and doing it myself? Ok fine but why belong then if all there will be are words and maybe feelings no action? I just feel kind of lost. You need ideas on rules? I got you Real time or LDR punishment? I got you Communication tips? I got you But how to have a successful virtual relationship or coping with lots of consistent distance... Que? Lol Aye part of humility is knowing where you lack lol

9/7/2015 9:30:31 PM
I think i have a fever and i would mention taking temperature but men always think of blow jobs well actually... Thats not a bad idea I'd love to suck one until i went to sleep

9/7/2015 6:47:50 PM
You need strict control? Lmao thats what a message said today... Nope i don't need it. I want it but I don't need it. I crave it but I dont need it. I've never had the level of strict control i desire and that's been ok, so again... I love it but I don't need it. I know my needs, I know my wants, and I've been blessed to know the difference. Thought for today: trying to make sense of other people's craziness could possibly lead you to being a fool. Is that really what you wanna do with your life? For me, I rather not. Growth is amazing

9/6/2015 10:42:37 AM
I miss tpe maybe just cause I'm sensitive today. Maybe because I see many struggle with it and remember how natural it feels when you are in sync. I know I'll find it.

9/3/2015 6:22:17 AM
Why do the same men come by my profile? Not just a glance but actually clicking the profile and looking at it. You do realize you can look without clicking so then I don't see the same faces in who's viewing you sheesh.

9/2/2015 10:03:41 AM
Tip: might wanna be careful ignoring your sub you might ignore her right under the leash of someone who IS paying attention lol.

8/28/2015 10:03:09 AM
So I'm focused on the future and that's the way it should be. I've met a few decent people thus far and hope to meet more.

8/20/2015 9:37:29 PM
Sometimes you just can't be friends... Sometimes too much hurt has been caused for no reason other than selfishness... Sometimes too many tears have been cried... Sometimes too many meaningless apologies have been given, and sometimes one that counts never comes. Sometimes you just can't be friends because the old feelings although old might still be real. Sometimes the touch might still be warm. Sometimes the unspoken connection might resurface. So that's the good and bad of why some just can't be Friends.

8/20/2015 7:01:23 PM
So I just had a great conversation with someone I really look up to. He's had my back through so much stuff and we hadn't touched bases in so long, just giving advice and actually understanding to a t how I feel sometimes just really helps... I know my few female friends have my back, actually... I don't but anyway often they have not walked in my shoes but a few steps. So when someone has walked in your shoes even if it was before your birth was even thought of, it helps A LOT.
In other news... if I've belonged to someone REGARDLESS of what has gone down I'm not going to only have bad to say. Number one because my taste is too good for that. Number two because that would make me an idiot to waste time and only have all bad. So if hearing me say something good or heartfelt about a former bothers you... Why ask me things that would involve them?. Here I'll even help... These are a few things that will naturally inspire a mention... Asking me bout experiences with anal, or trying to impress me because you have a rig, trying to get my attention talking about me kneeling naked or sleeping chained, going on and on about micromanagement shrugs we did and it didn't take a conversation to make it happen. It happened because I was his. If you want me as yours, focus on us learning each other, not getting ahead of yourself thinking that discussing any of the above will make me want to submit.
I don't respond well to being talked to as if I'm already yours unless that's how we roll. I get freaked out TOTALLY if you mention doing sexual things to me if I don't even personally know you like REALLY freaked out, like creeper type stuff. I can be super submissive but... Control the mind and the body will follow. Thats how you get me. I'm sorry if that sounds bad, bitchy, demanding, or whatever. You don't have to do anything to get me but if you want me you'll show me.

8/20/2015 9:40:07 AM
girls... if a chick pops out of the wood work after years of not talking to you... and the story you were told was that she tried to fuck your man but he declined... The truth is... She fucked your man... As for why she'd pop up... shrugs boredom I guess or to so called "help" your man... but we all know that just makes it even worse. 

8/17/2015 11:26:40 AM
Wishing I had a large handed Dom leaning over my shoulder asking "how's it going babygrl?" as I finish up this first assignment for the semester.

8/16/2015 6:44:03 PM
Lol@ people that I never personally gave my email to trying to appear... I wasn't even born at night time ya'll. Try again! Lol

8/15/2015 10:55:25 AM
I just love when men tell me that I'll be micromanaged by them without them even knowing anything about me... lol... They probably don't even realize that micromanaging a girl isn't this effortless bout of fun.. I mean it can be and often is fun but that takes time and often behavior mods lol. Orrrr maybe not... Lol at this point I wouldn't mind a little micro lol but I think macro management is more free flowing and easy for both.

8/13/2015 6:26:43 PM
Tip: I put it on another site but not here... When you ask a girl (at least me) the kinkiest thing I've done I really wish guys would realize it only makes the girl think of the person she did those things with and starting off with me wet and shaking from thoughts of another man... Isn't what I think any D type I'd want is searching for. I get the idea is figuring how far I'd go but that still wouldn't be a good way to figure it out.

8/13/2015 5:05:21 PM
8/13 ya I am odd... Are there other girls that feel odd when you are starting to like someone but haven't met so you know you have to keep options open, but then feel kinda bad for talking to other D's instead of focusing on one? I'm about to ask my lifestyle / homeboy lol he's married and poly so its funny cause i can not get over him not being able to sleepover with girls but he's also a Scorpio which means we can talk or fuss about anything and at the end of the day he's still probably gonna be my pal and I'll just ignore wifey running him. Heck if I don't belong to you wifey can run you like a 10k I don't care lol but its constantly shocking to me how many lifestyle D's let that crap slide lol. . But back on topic anytime I think of only talking to one guy until we meet it usually fades fast. But I also feel like can't I just be this one person's now and flirt occasionally until we meet? But nope I'm going to keep going slow and staying open. The right one(s) will come and set claim until then I guess I shouldn't feel guilty because I'm being up front. I think it's just still not being fully use to being a free agent so I just gotta get use to entertaining different coaches until the right team picks me! Hehe

8/12/2015 9:28:45 PM
So I've been busy with school stuff and everything is almost ready, just in time too! I'm surprised I got it all set, but I did without anyone nagging me about it or trying to motivate me. I even handled the math test and knew a lot of the stuff. Everyone was like I'll help you, after I took the test mind you lol but people meant well. At the end of the day it's me who has to do get it done and make sure those important to me do what they need to, but I'm even leaning back on that. People are going to do as they please so why worry myself about it lol.
I'm getting ready to knock this semester out and after I am going on my first cruise. I don't really get all the hoopla, a bunch of loud people on a boat but it's about time and who knows I might enjoy it. Plus, the lucky dom who joins me gets a trip so why not... I'm not sure by that point who it'll be because that's months off, but it'll be interesting to say the least. It's been a long time coming because when I talk to men that's always a question that comes up and if things get serious it's always suggested but never happens so this time just like with school, I'm taking the initiative and making it happen!
Then after that the big 30 will be approaching and oddly I don't feel bad about it. If I live that long there's a reason for it.

8/10/2015 5:17:25 PM
"How's the search?" The question I have received lately.... I think it's like an opening line or something lol. I'll answer anyway... I wouldn't call it a search as much as... Well hell I do miss being owned so yea, it's a search at this point lmao. It's going um... Not bad (no thanks to this site) lol. I have one meet planned and 2 people interested but they are going hella slow and for me that's saying something lol. If we clicked a while back but you feel I ignored you because I had a crazy sense of loyalty, then when I'm available and obtainable, you're texting every few days lol, you are likely asking to be ignored again and this time it's not because I'm taken or short leashed, this time it's because lol that's stupid.
If I were a dom and wanted a girl and knew after a while of "watching" her that she was big on voices, I'd call and let her hear me and make my interest known.... Eh well he made his interest known but hell telling me you're interested means nada. I'm looking for action. Guys on here make it like every girls a poser cause they don't wanna give the digits lol well sometimes you guys get the digits and what do you do with them lol ya text 3 words every few days lol or ask for naked pics. I know married dudes that let their wives run them who have better approach than that, c'mon.

So I'm leaning back a little and focusing a little on the one sending me some focus... Dude got the digits, dude used the digits... And I don't mean some bs wannabee phone dom crap nor do i mean hi how are you crap... I mean connecting, and that gentlemen, is how you get a meet. Not saying a meet with me is all that, it's totally not cause I'm majorly shy and like a 4 on looks lol... But shrugs a meet with many girls can be obtained not by trying to force her to post pics or do this or that. Not by trying to call her a fake in public threads. Not by being in her inbox answering every question she asks publicly (when she ends up being a fake lmao). But by taking time to actually get to know her, see if she might even have qualities you desire, and if you are the type of Master she desires to serve, and then if she gives that number that so many complain about not being able to get lol use it. Not like a psycho but use it lol. To learn and fill each other out and then lol she might suggest meeting before you do.

8/10/2015 4:52:45 PM
Sometimes men are odd individuals... I get the whole "can't live with em can't live without em" thing because it's only men that would check out people online of all places while the current love interest or sub they haven't been around in a while is right there but then when things fall go around as if they can't find the right person. lmao if there's people worth neglecting your current D/s partner for, then when the relationship ends it should be fast and easy to jump on those people that had your attention, right? Unless it's just doing stupid stuff for no reason. I wouldn't neglect my partner but if I did trust me whoever is worth neglecting you for better be right there when we break up or I'm really wasting my time being a dummy. smh men men sometimes doms make nilla guys look beter and better.

8/9/2015 12:31:08 PM
I've received lots of opinions about my 3 weeks out of 2 months... Men saying "it's not enough time" men saying "how could you deal with that amount of time away" men saying "I thought you were the clingy type".... Well I wrote that on my profile because it was suggested I express my view of what would be ideal even though I don't really feel there is one.
Let me explain.. That 3 weeks out of 2 months comes right after the words "at least". I'm not sure why some omit that but for me at least means that's the least amount of time I can comfortably deal with being away.
Why you may ask? Well for starters, some Doms drive me crazy and I drive some Doms crazy not on purpose but we all don't mesh so in the beginning stages I have no desire to see your face (regardless of how sexy it is) every freaking day continuously. Hell there's some days I annoy my dang self *shrugs*. Also most likely there will be some distance if I end up clicking with someone so why would I say 3 or 4 weeks when I know we might not be able to get to each other that often. I'm not trying to suddenly move in at the beginning.
For those wondering how am I sure enough to arrive at that specific amount of time... That's about the amount of time I had in my last relationship (give or take a few weeks) when I sum it up and for me that was perfect... Why was it perfect? I'm an introvert and we both benefited from time to miss each other. I enjoyed my "home time" to collect my thoughts, to relax, to enjoy memories we made, to think of new naughty things I want to do to please him. Without that, things get common (regardless of who I'm with), without that I get moody and so would many people, without that people seem to take each other for granted. But with that time, you can miss the little things, you can get romantic ideas, you can improve on flaws, you can surprise them with a new outfit or top or toy they just love.
As for those saying "I'd want 24/7" To you I ask... Are you saying you want to physically be around 24/7? Do you realize you don't have to physically be around 24/7 to have control 24/7? My guess is the men saying "I'd want 24/7" don't factor in the water cooler time or at work time or getting to work time that they have away. When I've had 24/7 I have LITERALLY been with the Master 24/7. That means... When we ate, when I went to the restroom, when we showered, when he or I worked, when we slept... Like literally ALL FREAKING HOURS of that 24hrs for 7 days multiplied by 3 or 4 and after that regardless of how much you love or want to serve someone... A moment to yourself is necessary lmao. So that's when I'd take a nap at an odd time, or stay in and get something done so he could breathe and I could too or go away for a week or two. Plus life happens so things would come up on both ends giving us time away or time together.
You thought I was the clingy type?... Um ya know I am really not into references but like seriously LMAO I say this with all humility ASK ABOUT ME (you can only ask two men because I'm not like that with everyone but shrugs)... lol If I am into a Master I am majorly clingy... I have knelt beside a man all freaking day again literally only getting up to do things for him. So yes, I'm clingy but that doesn't mean I have to be right there everyday forever. lol My clingyness shows more if I haven't been around the person in a while or if I'm just leaving the person and miss them. So again that time away can actually ADD to the cling factor. Now if you share my experience of 24/7 and you are saying you want your WHOLE life or even a year of it to have the same person with you every waking MOMENT of it... Um... YKINMK and that's ok... Outrageously weird but still ok giggles.
I love 24/7 I do. I love it even when I hate it lol but I also like a man having his time for his morning rituals or to hang with his friends or to do whatever it is he does that makes him come to me, grab me, kiss me passionately and say "hey babygirl" I have missed my slave". If that makes me picky, domly, bratty, a fake or whatever takes title and sticks it on my head.
For me, 3 weeks out of 2 months (8 weeks) is great. If I end up being Owned again and he decides to move me in, then I'll ho that row when I get to it but I still would have somewhere in my contract that we have our own days or moments to breathe. If he has a normal job away from the home then that in itself is enough time.

8/8/2015 9:27:24 PM
Sending flack my way for me being open to married dudes who don't hide it? Eh well shrugs. I know men and women who aren't happy for whatever reason and sometimes the partner just doesn't give a dang so it is what it is. I've served someone married and if it hadn't been for others controlling their life and lots of other lies I would have continued to. The only sucky part is regardless of how shitty the wife treats them at the end of the day they're going to defend her even if the context isn't at all applicable. When that happens it's time for me to walk lol. But besides that I don't get people acting like a piece of paper means you aren't human... Like a marriage means the person won't care for you, make memories with you, give you quality time, or try to protect you from everything excluding themselves. Whatever happened to your kink is not my kink? Lol I've never gone after anyone married. I've never started a relationship knowing someone was married. But would I start one... It depends... The experience helped us both teach each other something... I think I taught him being a lying asshole with a decent heart gets a girl who love you more than anyone in your life hurt extremely bad. He taught me that lying assholes are sometimes at the end of the day people who do stupid things and still need care. Is it cool to fix a marriage or finally tell the truth at the expense of my heart? Heck no, but guess what? It happened. And guess what? I'm STILL here! Being me doing my best not to cause the hurt that was sent my way. Doing my best not to play the games that were played on me. If that's messed up.... That's your opinion. Would I rather single? Heck yea I want a person I can build a life with. The person that might end up gaining my focus is younger than I and single. I like the lack of obligations, but that doesn't mean I wouldn't be open if I felt chemistry to someone with or without a piece of paper. For the ones who hide or lie about it, you'll get whats coming to ya. For those who have in the past, karma is a b.

8/8/2015 3:56:01 PM
No! If you yell at your girl it doesn't make you an abuser lol not if she likes it... Alot *giggles*

8/6/2015 10:17:01 PM
Sometimes people overcome things you never thought they would. I saw this lifestyle couple that had their relationship unravel online for all to see and they have now reconciled like a yr later. So I guess it goes to show ya never know what will happen in life.
shrugs

7/24/2015 10:17:56 PM
7/25/15 Sex.... Maybe it's my sign or morals or views but i just have no desire without emotion. It's pointless... I've had sex when the fire had dwindled but it was still ok because we still loved each other just not in love i guess. Since then I've thought about hooking up. I've asked about rebounding. But it's a loss. Those who know me know i just wouldn't be fulfilled like that. Sigh... But having someone touching, kissing, grinding is nice. Just has to be an emotional connection. Being demisexual sucks sometimes. But i haven't tried seeing if an oral hook up would do well. Tonight... I just want hugs and cuddles but nooo even those i gotta be picky

7/22/2015 11:09:02 AM
Question for the day have my tits been flogged? I don't think they have if so not much other things were done to them

7/20/2015 9:13:44 AM
sigh the thing about talking to more than one girl iwhen you aren't an upfront poly person or aren't great at multitasking is key details like age location etc get mixed up and for some reason guys forget that cs keeps history and even when it does its so sloppy so here's a tip fellas... Write it down... Her age location allergies and key information... Why am I offering this tip? I have no fricking idea I guess not really to help ya'll but to spare girls the pain of realizing lol you want our focus but can't give yours. So if this tip keeps a girl from getting her feelings hurt great!

7/18/2015 7:18:38 PM
Sigh you ask vanilla guys to pick a snack and... You'll end up starving cause all they can respond with is... Anyway... I miss having a daddy this teaching people or going through the motions of learning me is draining. They don't realize the right answer would have me begging to do the not so right answer lol. About to get off this phone and focus on one of my lifestyle workbooks

7/18/2015 7:54:13 AM
Sigh another man claiming to have trained 10,00 slaves um LOL what number is 10,00? Missing a zero or did he misplace the, no matter. See the thing is its one thing to approach in a decent regular way and offer guidance it's another thing to be a jerk about it and try telling me who I am. Call me vanilla if you wish. Heck if i were my life would probably be so much better but I'm not and if i was i would feel empty.

7/16/2015 8:47:49 AM
I can spot a lazy dom so easily nowadays. So I just follow the laziness until I'm bored lol.

7/15/2015 7:52:45 PM
This dude specifies the girl can't have any racist thoughts or bigoted behaviors while right before typing that he specifies he has interest in women of every race but his own... Stare... Seriously? Wow just not even wow just... Blank

7/15/2015 11:36:35 AM
It's so odd i move super slow unless i feel that connection. So if we're talking and I'm going at a pace you think is too slow feel free to tell me. I promise I'll understand and if i don't that's on me to handle. With my last Master and last potential it was just a natural chemistry I'm not going to rush or be rushed. Meanwhile if i offer my number or ask about yours and you aren't ready I'll be sure to let you know it's not my speed. Sound fair?

7/14/2015 8:03:15 PM
Lol i need a jealous man is that bad?

7/14/2015 11:32:32 AM
7/14/15 So i guess people don't get separation doesn't mean you still let her run your life or that she has no knowledge of said separation. It means you don't live or have the desire to live together fuck together or do anything but be civil together. Civil does not consist of keeping her in your life or letting her keep tabs on you or punching a guy for breaking her heart. Lol. I'm putting it out there because I'm seeing more and more "doms" that don't get what it means or some do get what it means and have to deal with their agreement. It's the latter I'm giving a chance to. But I'm not moving for someone married or separated. I know how fast it can go from "I'm only with her cause we never got around to a divorce" and jumps to with a big grin "it's odd with her trying to get back with me" while they feed into it. Lol that's game playing and I'm not putting myself at risk to be played. People are cool to not want you until someone has you then starts the good behavior. So for those who fall into that trap go for it. I'm going to be open because i get how people marry and then get stuck but based on past experience I'm not committing unless I'm shown visual or audible proof of separation and then I'm still not moving for that even if i commit. They can divorce or move here or heck I'm adaptable i can cope with the distance. I much rather distance than the drama from you being controlled by some woman or afraid of her reaction when you're claiming to be separated. So that's the FYI to those it may apply. I'm not just trying to be only a babygirl only a slave I'm trying to also be a partner. If your life doesn't have room or wife doesn't give you permission for that , it doesn't mean I'm not interested it means, poly is the option for us so i can fill the role you want and I can find someone to build with or leave me be if that's not cool. I'm sure you can find many who love to be side girls and I'm sure I can find the total Package or parts of the package willing to share lol As for my new friend who says he's permanently separated it's kept for proof incase any drama pops up. Update: 7/21 i think lol,but not today. This dude is still going over there to be Mr saveasocalledexwife so again lol, that's not a permanent separation. That's living somewhere else cause yall couldn't get along living together lmao.

7/11/2015 9:44:59 PM
So i took a quiz that basically confirmed what I'd explained to some men. Being beta doesn't bother me as long as you're real about it lol

7/9/2015 9:40:56 PM
I feel bad when men say they know me or know we click from my writings. It's humbling and flattering, but what I write doesn't even scratch who i am. I keep that even deeper inside. Only two d types in this lifestyle truly know somewhat who i am and where my passion is. That took time and learning me. It took patience for me to want to submit. It took hurting my heart to realize I was genuine. So thanks if you read any of my journal but there's still a person here behind the words to know you.

7/7/2015 6:25:24 PM
Just because you are due an apology doesn't mean you'll get it. Meanwhile, just because you don't get it doesn't mean it's not due. Don't take a too little too late bone over what you really deserve. If it's meant to be it'll come exactly as it should and if it doesn't, keep it going forward with our skipping a beat. Sweet dreams

7/7/2015 9:56:12 AM
Lol a 40 yr old woman feels this isn't the right lifestyle for me lmao she should be working on her manners

5/20/2015 11:17:17 PM
I feel like this site won't have what I seek. Same profiles same types of messages and the messages that are long and detailed I just can't focus enough without my mind going somewhere else. I want to say everything is great and that I'm not hurting. I can't I can say I'm done being angry with all involved including myself. I can say I'm not spending days wondering why but there's still too many memories too many reminders and too many guys who arent sincere for me to be able to be on here actively looking. So I don't know. Right now I'm gonna cry a little and go to sleep. Then smile because tomorrow is a new day and with each day I'm making an effort to kerp progressing.

5/19/2015 6:50:31 PM
Lately a few net people i was chatting with are thinking I'm nilla because I don't admit to being kinky or I'm not into talking about sex. Shrugs, I know knuckleheads that don't expect a girl to talk sex in the same week ya start talking. I just... I like sex I do I promise but even if you've known me years unless you're in my head I just don't have a desire. It is kind of annoying me that I'm not like that, but I just it really just makes me wanna hide and cry myself to sleep. I know toughen up buttercup you're online. Still is uncomfortable, And for the love of everything dominant, guys please STOP saying I'm different from the otber guys you have no clue how common that really makes you.

5/15/2015 11:34:30 PM
my asshole is so smooth. Lol i dont know why its not like im gonna let somebody in it... just cant do it. Maybe after while but i just cant.

5/14/2015 8:28:00 PM
I want CUDDLES!

5/14/2015 5:24:46 PM
I like those new people you talk to and just being yourself makes them laugh. I had one of those few hours when you drink fresh brewed mint tea and smoke a black and still feel irritated until you bring a smile to someone's face and you forget your stress.

5/13/2015 10:13:43 PM
Staying hopeful with odds like these explained: read entry below if you desire. None of my relationships were perfect, but I'll tell you what I've told them. I've been madly, deeply, genuinely in love twice! That's more than most can say and although it ended from basically as they both said "not understanding what you were offering" and one from that and his family just being (in my opinion and his often times) too controlling and using him. I had my heart wrenching heart break and piece it back together in the end it sucks, but the feeling of being deeply in love with a man is just, amazing. The one I thought would be the third or last once again just wasn't ready plus he never met me eye to eye so it doesn't count i guess but at least I'm not wondering what if. I just think with both of them if I could have gotten to them before "life did" I could have given them the love and service I gave and they would have been able and willing to reciprocate the love and match the service with effort and control. I don't blame them I blame me being about 20 or 25 yrs too late, and that my friends is where age becomes more than a number because by the time a genuine girl gets to an older man the man is sometimes so far removed from what they truly as a man deserve and what's expected of them that they don't get how to cherish it and in the end that's all I really wanted. I stay hopeful that the right man or heck men even will finally be ready and when I'm in deep love and service I'll be cherished

5/13/2015 10:00:43 PM
Sometimes feeling yourself is just what you need. I'm in that mood right now because I know at the end I've got me and dating and living is cool until the right vibe. Rant: So as for the first new trucker guy lol he wanted to see me because he had time today, supposedly he dumped his gf lol (yea right that's got his job written all over it) but I was cool then he tries saying he keeps it real so I had to call him on his crap. How dare you say you keep it real when I'm pretty sure ya girl doesn't know I have your number nor does she know you were trying to make me your girl after ONE day lol. he's all well that wasn't her business cause she's still obeying her ex wellllll lol maybe you should man up and get the ex out of the way or end it. Ughhhh I'm getting soooo sick of women and men 40+ staying in relationships they aren't happy in but justifying it with anything they can think of when really it's probably an understandable fear of being alone or abandoned so people go from one to another but still keeping the one that makes them unhappy or uncared for, just because of years or security. I'm not doing it nor am I going to tolerate those who do (besides the ones related to me) lol. I finally got him to understand but the kicker was I explained since her and I shared signs that she needed a controlling man he decides to say "shes not a child and I told you I'm not a controlling man anymore" you want the kicker? DO YOU WANT THE KICKER??? He was giving the girl a FRICKEN ALLOWANCE!!! But when it came to control and putting in freaking effort it's "she's not a child". Ok ok someone help me cause i thought children got allowances he could have at least played semantics and called it a stipend lol actually don't help cause I'm not wrapping my head around that. All it proves is what's been proven: another man rather go in his pocket to handle a home he doesn't live in (nope they didnt live together) to support a woman who he really rather not put in the effort to train or understand her so he can be pleased. I easily could have accepted his invite to move in and be "taken care of" heck he would have been happier, but nooooo the freaking morals and decency and taking something just because it's available not being right clicked in my head. I just... I'm not perfect I'm not. I'm totally not the prettiest or smartest but I've got a damn good heart and a level of loyalty that frustrates the hell out of me sometimes. So I just leaned back and I was gonna try being friends and see where it goes but I can't. In the past when I didn't spot men like him I wished I had seen signs but if I went into this it would be like repeating history with hindsight just minus him having any obligations (supposedly). So I didn't see him today but if he reaches out I'll be his friend heck I'm attracted to him and we do chat it up well so maybe even a benefit but nothing more I just can't. The only reason I'm entertaining friendship or benefits is because he was honest about the gf. I'm sharing all this because 1. Men are funny 2. he's like the 3rd man this year financially supporting a woman who runs him but at least he's not calling himself a dom 3. It helps to get it out lol and put it in prospective 4. Names aren't listed to protect the users and the used lol oh well and us people with hearts still believing in love have this to pick from. thank goodness hes not on here. Lol how do I stay hopeful with odds like this?

5/12/2015 10:38:50 AM
People wonder why I tell men they should check their profile before checking their girl's lol I just noticed somehow mine said I was only seeking dominant women lol now I know why the increase in messages from Dommes lol

5/12/2015 5:59:13 AM
So another associate lol two truck guys in one week but this one ummmm. I frankly doubt his sincerity. Hes talking about stuff he has which is cool cause it wasnt bragging but then he went into the whole are you freaky stuff. I hate when guys ask the freakiest thing ive done its so juvenile and lets me know they likely have that as their focus. So then it goes into a few things so im agreeing cause he sounds sexy then he comes at a hard limit. I make it clear its a limit and he goes back and forth a bit then laughs it off. Theres only one person ive even considered breaking that limit for and he was pretty selfish with me so he wasnt going to let that happen. So this guy laughs it off like oh of course i wouldnt do that to you but that was enough. The seriousness in his voice screwed it whether he was playing or not. I know likely he was doing what many guys do feeling around to see how far he could go but he should have stopped after i was clear. I know certain asshatery comes from certain professions but ive had relationships with men in that area and none of them joked about that. Too bad too because i was looking forward to actually spending some time and riding in one of his classics. Shrugs im sorry but money doesnt make my pussy cum and being kinky wont make you my man.

5/10/2015 5:25:10 PM
lol i swear, so i have a new associate he's a trucker (if you knew me youd get the i swear lol) and of course it comes out he has a gf but heck im cool cause i didn't have to find out anything on my own he was upfront i can live with that lol. dude said the girls ex still controls her but he's not controlling lol he tripped when i said "aw thats too bad" Shrugs nothing wrong with a new pal. Wish me luck on the meet in a week. his gripe is he only sees her once a week welp hes gotta be in my area every week so, until the right one comes along this might be cool. Only thing is when the right one comes i know I'm gonna hear "close the freaking door, close this door, leave that one alone, ok good babygirl now your mine" and I'm going to drip all over the place lol. Why am i going to drip? Lol because i loveeee a selfish man but he's gotta be transparent and trustworthy otherwise doors will be open like a walmart lol

5/9/2015 3:42:22 PM
Wishing everyone a lovely mothers day weekend and if yours is no longer around live your life the way she'd be proud of and honor her memory the best you can.

5/9/2015 10:13:56 AM
This lifestyle is full of men ready to take take take but few are ready to actually GIVE. Give effort, give protection from their own actions before being so worried about someone ekse treating their girl like crap, give emotional and mental control and support, give their heart, give their best in exchange for a girl giving her ALL. Do i have standards and expectations. Yes yes i do because if I'm giving my all and genuinely ready to be fully involved in the Dom's life there's no reason he cant match my effort.

5/8/2015 11:17:23 PM
My friend and i were talking and wondering if doms wouldnt mind not being told if they got their girl preg just so if things collapsed they wouldnt feel obligated to stay. I dont think its an obligation to tell the guy unless you know he wants it and wont change his mind otherwise raise it solo

5/8/2015 10:52:01 PM
i want cuddles lol i really dont i want so much more.

5/2/2015 5:55:50 PM
I'm around, i did think about stepping away, but it's not time yet. The past month has been a stress free one for the most part. I stuck to the goals i set for myself in spite of anything else that may have taken place. I've learned about people and myself as i evolve and slowly get better at setting boundaries. I'm still having that bit of faith the right one who genuinely desires to build and enjoy the remainder of life with does exist. in the midst of my patience i stand and continue on my journey.

4/25/2015 9:14:11 PM
To me attention and focus is good then go for the sub mind. If other lifestyle areas are tapped before that the result might be rebellion. How can you control something you do not have? This takes effort gents. If you're expecting me to just cave and take disrespect nope. If you're expecting respect because you are functioning in a respectable manner, if we share mutual interest you will acquire what you want. It's all a process. I don't deserve your dominance if I'm trying to top you into it. My submission is not motivated by combos besides beginning with D / s the rest of the BDSM will work it's way in, but for me after chemistry is clear that's the best foundation. We all respond to different things. If your heart is in sexual pleasure great, if its key to start with S & M cool, but on this journey the above is what i have learned about me.

4/12/2015 5:25:38 PM
communication is the key I think for some its the chase for others its the real long term for others its the play we're all different but if I say I'm not the one believe me from jump lol cause I'll just be proven right anyway

4/12/2015 4:19:57 PM
So there's this person and besides my former, this person is like the only Master / Daddy who i felt i could be myself woman me little me and naughty me with... but he lives far, very far, and I'd be isolated, and it didn't seem he could handle my sensitivity. Knowing that the past is. I guess the past, i cant help but wonder... Wonder if there's a reason i can't shake him even though we never touched. If there's a reason i thought I'd be good for him, even though he didn't seem to want to be expressive due to something he deals with. i guess i just wonder, if i missed a good thing. Or if he missed a good thing. I guess I'll never know, but if he reads this violets still would like to bid farewell.

4/10/2015 10:11:54 PM
If I trust you please don't hurt me. I'm so drained from it all, as I maintain my strength please answer the call, of love if you feel it. My heart, you don't have to heal it. The cracks may help us to understand each others feelings. I can love and care. Kneel and crawl. Be calm and be aware. I can't do it all, but I'd try for the one. I'd cry from the love. We make, chances we take, memories from the past fade, so my passion can stay awake, the love can shake, my body and soul ache, for my King to make, his presence known.

3/13/2015 9:33:30 PM
Caress my hand just because, tell me what my voice does, need more than a fuck, a bit more extreme than love... You can trust me, if you want me, guess im lucky, to see something and not lose passion. So sit with me a moment, few minutes later you're moaning, i love to hear a man groaning, I've got expertise in phone boning, but i really need a man controlling, my body and genuinely honing, in on me and toning, my curious interest would start showing, obedience would keep growing, our connection would, begin flowing... Im kinda sick of giving or getting rejection while they focus on owning, but won't own. We speak of trust, but none shown. I don't know... I speak of love, service, and a bond, but with each word, each day keeps going... Passing me by... sick of hopes based on lies, preparing or declaring, trying, or crying, which I've kept in check lately, sensitivity dying, still enough of me left, with something inside. For one strong enough to reveal his core, peel me back, find out I'm more, since woman came from a rib, he'll take me safe and secure, back inside near his heart. I'd be a source of his pride, I've not been to anyone , as his possession i wouldnt part, and in his possession I'd be loved more than a priceless work of art, because... He recrafted me.... Sigh as it rains i wish for the same i always, to look into the future and see clearly but no one can... For the girls who get owned super fast, i get your hunger... But often its not being owned when done so fast , just possessed, but i do understand I really do.

3/13/2015 3:10:28 AM
I had super potent coffee... was literally up all night #stuffgirlsdo #whycollarscomeinhandy

3/6/2015 6:22:09 PM
At your feet i lay, on your lap i play, in your car i beg, in your heart instead, of where?

2/20/2015 6:03:10 PM
men are complicated as us women sometimes. if a guy takes a girl out and she eats up $40.00 they complain (I've heard guys do this) but if a guy asks a girl out and she rather grab a juice or coffee its "odd or devaluing". See this is why I rarely date. if people got to know a girl BEFORE asking her out, odd stuff might become obvious stuff.

2/16/2015 3:30:36 PM
Guys a tip i have given before.... If a girl won't block out her number and call you or sign up for a free Google voice account after 2 plus weeks of messaging she's just not that serious about anything near real time. Unless she has a speech issue and there's Skype for that. Girls, if a Dom has your interest go ahead and do a records check. Don't be afraid to ask him to email copies of divorce forms and check backgrounds. If he tells more than 3 lies in the beginning figure if you like him if you do, do the same thing he does because he will lie from the beginning till the very end. If you want to be decent stop at his third lie and move on. If not be prepared and do not give yourself fully. And a tip certain professions earned.their stereotypes, you will rarely find the exception here but keep the faith and be smart

2/15/2015 10:08:01 AM
if someone is man enough to make a choice I'm gonna be a woman enough to live with it whether it is hard or not. when I walk away I see it as me giving up. when they walk away I see it as them giving in to what they wanted to do from the beginning that's life. its a lovely day outside but chilly enjoy it everyone

2/7/2015 11:47:54 AM
if you're a black guy and your name has something to do with seeking a white girl or you can't seem to have one black girl out of all the pics of females you have with you on your profile I will have sense enough to realize I'm not your type, so please dont expoect a pleasant response. I already know what's to come, been there, done that, so please spare us both the wasted time. I don't mind interracial at all but I'd never be rude or ignorant enough to clearly show my preference and then pursue someone that is not... guys if you aren't my preference I might not be rude and tell you but I'm going to let you show me who you are, not start you off with you wondering why I'm talking to you. i post this because of the increase of black guys reaching out but their name or profile already is bias

2/7/2015 11:41:26 AM
the good thing about ending contact with a past sub / slave, everything that bothered you about him / her you are now completely free of. nothing they do is an issue or stressor. no fussing, no anger, no jealousy, no feeling less... so whenever you consider going back to the past remember everything that you were bothered by, remember every gripe, issue, accusation, and pet peeve, inhale, exhale, and then, keep walking forward never to look back because if she or he was bad enough to make you walk away there's no way they'd suddenly be good enough to make you walk back, and if they are you probably should have thought about that beforehand. keep life forward in motion. just advice.

2/6/2015 1:28:58 PM
if you want me youll be a leader not following my actions. if that's going to happen lol I can go domme or vanilla lord knows things would be easier lol. Sometimes I think that's why so many women are domme, they give men a chance to lead and they don't take it seriously.... If you want me cool, prove it. Leans back, no mudslinging or drama here guys. I want everyone to have what makes them happy. I just think some can't be honest enough with self to admit what that really is and others don't feel they deserve to be happy. if that's true focus on being deserving of it. if you deserve it and get it, cherish it when you have it.

2/5/2015 5:22:44 PM

THE WHOLE DOORMAT THING...
I see it a lot... "I'm not a doormat" and I can understand, but if I may a moment put a different twist on it, because at a point in my life (in my personal opinion of course) I was a doormat and as long as my doormatry lol was appreciated I enjoyed it!

A doormat welcomes you as soon as you see it.
It cleans your shoes and reminds you when you see it that you’re home
It’s soft and sometimes shiny
When it’s cold out and it’s inside, you feel a sense of warmth
It serves it’s purpose
It gives the doggy somewhere to lay
It keeps the floor underneath it clean
Without it, you may slip
You’d track things into the house
You’d be frustrated and need to clean and mop and and and
A doormat is the key and even if it isn’t it’s right there when you use the key
Doormats are great as long as the owner deserves to have it
So, power to the doormats!

Disclaimer: I am in no way saying mistreatment is okay. I’m saying if you trust someone enough to lay down as they joyful walk all over you then if you both are happy, it’s beautiful.


2/4/2015 12:19:47 PM
If I make the step of giving you a way to contact me directly after all this hoopla about being serious, and you don't or you do but only for a few moments out of a week lol shrugs don't expect me to be receptive. I did my part *pops collar*. It's amazing sometimes the doms are as bad as they say us girls are. All this about real or fussing about girls beating around the bush but when someone takes a chance on you, ya don't even notice it. NEXT! lol and if ya can't answer certain questions without hesitation lol eye roll. 

2/2/2015 4:42:54 PM
i no longer read bulk mail (even when bored) so if you have more to tell me lol don't, go tell him or her or the other her PLEASE! And if you get off on being rude good luck with that too. I'm being me

1/28/2015 5:27:44 PM
To those "surprised" I'm still here and with a new "attitude" lol good thing this isn't my first profile, if it were you'd really think I've been here a while. As for the surprise... Come on people, it's a billion girls here, and some look like super models and act like puppets with the dom giving little effort so heck if it was my choice me or them lol taking them is the easiest choice, so I can't blame anyone. Girls like that can be therapy for a man so I hear... lol We all will have our time. Thanks for the compliments, kind words, and not so kind words lol.

1/26/2015 8:39:19 PM
my hearts broken in 5 places

1/26/2015 8:02:45 PM
today was a long day that just got worse... shrugs its cool I'm accustomed to certain things

1/26/2015 7:25:01 PM
Your command will be my wish/ My genuine service will consist/ of hitting every nook and cranny and of course crevices/ with just one look I'll go from standing to both knees begging a kiss,/ part of my purpose is to please and I can resist/ but what's the point in harboring needs, if I can bask while being captive/ mentally I mean, cause physically any bitch/ can bottom for some scenes, and secretly think "I hate this"/ I want to realize your dreams and have you smile, like "wow, we're making/ them become reality, look at all she has forsaken/ to keep progressing" in my past my heart was aching/ That helped me improve me, and my inner strength awakened/ some called it domin?ng. i call it protecting my heart from breaking/ But when that true King, finds me preparing not just waiting/ those guards up standing will find peace, and wherever he's taking/ I'll follow his lead, and believe in the path he's making/ for us for love for real I guess I'm saying, service isn't about just what I do its how i think. breathe, cry, smile, and even when not visible it's still what I feel,/ roflmao ya wouldn't believe what the hell happened in the midst of me writing this.... shrugs

1/23/2015 9:03:56 PM
you're a wolf, I'd be your prey/ you want to teach I'll learn today/ make me leak with words you say / just please keep me in my place/ no deceit that's the way/ to always treat, genuine slaves/ say you're ready I say o k/ we shall see where we go a ways/ if it's winter I like it cold,/ isn't it better for you to hold?/

1/9/2015 5:28:44 PM
if you use condoms and still enjoy sex share your motivation and tips. if you think condoms are the devil lol share how you trust your partner(s) so much. if you didn't trust them, would you use condoms to be sure or not engage at all? do you realize they aren't 100%?

1/3/2015 3:13:01 PM
When it comes to service, I don’t sleep/
The tolls are bittersweet, the roads might be bumpy/
There’s interest for me to pique, aisles for me to peak/
Yesssss I doubt me, periodically/
My trials might make me weep, meanwhile, I take a seat/
For a spell to just think, about where I use to be/
Bound was my creed, but now, I know it’s free/
Found what I need, deep inside of me/
Fast-forward and see, how great it’ll be/
When I’ve found who I seek, I’ll mount the highest peak/
I guarantee, his style will be distinct/
Oh, I agree, its beyond, me on my knees/
My goal is to keep, his smile on repeat/
So, I’d work to see, him fully pleased/
He’ll be the one to keep, the innermost key/
I’m genuinely, set to go deep/
Defined, simply… The beauty of following/

I guess, I’ll title this piece, my discovery

1/2/2015 6:39:20 PM
I really wan cuddles right now :-(

1/2/2015 3:37:12 PM
People who know me (very few personally) know I'm not big on sounding boards, having one or being one to a girl, but I talked to my friend today and oddly feel a bit more clear about some things. I thought our friendship was fading and now I feel like neither of us were doing our jobs but we're both more open to it. She really asked questions about what's going on in my lifestyle mind and I asked about her life. Talking to her helped me to actually see what I was thinking. I have a lot more clarity and my straightforward approach is back. So here's to the new year all.

12/30/2014 9:30:00 AM
Sometimes.... I just wish... People could see exactly what each other are thinking... It would help a lot. Wishing everyone a happy new year.

12/26/2014 5:10:30 PM
I want... CUDDLES and a lap... And and and... Cuddles up in fuzzy jammies

12/25/2014 2:57:41 PM

it takes time to get to know me. if you want a girl to just quickly jump into something or automatically submit there's plenty who will move just as fast as you like. I guarantee it... I do things gradually or not at all. Dom or not, I'm going to take my time. Read a book before writing the essay ya dig? If not cool, I've been rolling solo and have no problem to continue to do so. Yep I miss being controlled, but it doesn't mean I'm desperate enough to just obey anyone...


12/17/2014 7:48:05 PM
I'm really wanting cuddles. I saw a stuffie to cuddle I gonna go and get it. Dear Santa, bring me a daddy dom and let me keep him at least til new years lol

12/15/2014 6:50:31 AM
I'm not trying to be mean. Where my profile says "no busy business men", it's there for a reason. I know what executives, managers, etc have to offer and even if I don't, it shows in about 5 days TOPS. We would not make each other happy. I'm sure the right girls are out there for that situation. Also, to the ones complaining about being used, quit letting a girl know how much you make and bragging about it in the first few messages and maybe it won't happen. I'm not looking for an atm

12/5/2014 11:09:02 AM
She had done too much.  Pushed too many envelopes. Forgot temporarily everything He'd trained her to do. Things were getting weak. He put her on his lap "Thunder, why are you acting this way?" he asked. She paused. She hadn't seen him in 3 weeks. When they talked it was either her in trouble or his frustrations of life. Thunder wanted her Pa. She wanted what once was back when they met. She didn't have it. Couldn't force it. So she just relaxed, a bit too much. "You don't want me! Just admit it!" thunder cried. Eddie looked down at his girl, not even feeling she was his girl in some ways. She'd sexted, left after curfew with only God knows who, and didn't keep up with her check in times. Other girls titled Eddie as a control freak but when he met Thunder, she loved the way He was and he loved being loved.  Eddie placed his hand on her thigh. Thunder tried getting up. He wrapped his arms around her and she struggled to get away until she felt weak, with tears dripping down her face. Eddie kissed them away. Squeezed her tight and he whispered "its ok, we'll fix it baby. You'll be a kept little slut again and everything will be fine."   

12/1/2014 11:43:58 AM
Take the time to hit the ones you love off with joy not drama. If all you have toward a person is negativity, they probably shouldn't be in your life. Im choosing love, who's with me?

11/30/2014 10:06:22 PM

Help me pick a vacation?destination. Tell me where and why. Preferably?US or if not then somewhere unique. The idea I pick gets something from me. The top 3 ideas get to ask me anything and are promised an answer.?Hoping to have ideas before Dec?15th... ?thanks bunches

Top Three; keywest, Orlando and mexico are the top 3 so thanks for that... no nore suggestions please. if you suggested one of these, message me your 1 question. FYI i will check our conversation history to see if you suggested it or if youre juat being a time waster.

11/30/2014 9:49:45 PM
Tell me that tonight, I dont need to worry / tell me that if I'm yours you'll do your best not to hurt me / been waiting for that for a while so, this girl is in no hurry / I've got a unique style, and a slight habit of flirting / an innocent smile and occasionally you'll get me squirting / but when I cream its good too / tell me your dreams and I'll try to / make them reality yep they'll come true / if you're holding me I might as well cum too /

11/17/2014 10:29:17 PM
I'm a strong believer in flattery won't get a man everywhere, especially with me, but it is nice to hear certain things, when you have no reason not to be convinced the man means it. It's... Comforting, I suppose. I am accustomed to verbally or physically expressing my level of adoration for a man I'm interested in but, it's been a while since received from the other end. If you have, want, or simply have interest in someone, I'm not suggesting you kiss booty, do that too if it works, but don't hesitate to give credit or a compliment when due, and if you think it's rarely or never due... Ask yourself, what are You doing with, or being interested in sharing something with the person. Lifestyle slaves are still females lifestyle Doms or Masters are still men. We are still human. Kind words, still bring warmth, and baby it's cold outside :-). Good night, good morning, sweet dreams, and great day to one and all. For the first time in a while, this writing doesn't really have an "urgency" to it. Muse, maybe.

11/16/2014 7:01:51 PM

If you're informed you two dont click, disagreeing will likely not improve the situation. If someone feels that way, why try convincing them different? You are a great person or at least the right person for someone, so shrug it off and appreciate the honesty. Arguing the person down or trying to change their mind is in my opinion one of the main reasons "deleted unread" is a frequent occurrence on here. Many would say "not interested" or "I've enjoyed our chats but feel no spark" if pressure wasn't the response to that, or even worse, insults. I am not saying I'm right, its only my view. I respect people's right to fight for something, but make sure you can say it's worth fighting for... And a few days or weeks, probably aren't.


11/16/2014 6:50:35 PM

Passing tests... Often times in this life a girl expresses lack of interest by adding "but we can be friends". As I grow I realize everyone isn't meant to be friends. So when that sucky moment or epiphany of not clicking comes, it is best for some of us to explain and refrain. If the other person offers friendship and it would be productive, then that's great, but if not, using friends to soften a blow is often worse than not causing the blow and leading someone on. Be honest, be caring, be humble. Just my thought and my lesson I'm still forcing myself to learn.


11/14/2014 3:06:50 PM
To new Doms... If you're starting out and run into a girl who seems nice or genuine, if you don't know men who could help or guide you, try not being afraid to let a slave or sub assist you. (See how if it's another Dom I said guide and a sub / slave I said assist, in other words she's not taking the lead, but helping you). A slave / sub is actually equipped to express to you what you may / may not want to get to or from your future girl. She can show you what your future girl(s) may or may not require. Yes, a woman can't teach a man to be a man, but she can help him to be a better one. So don't feel like a wimp or like you're being topped just for deciding to have a female assist instead of a male mentor. I mean, look at your lifestyle journey as your own company for a moment... How many successful business men (if they can without fucking her) have a woman as their assistant or right hand girl? Very very many... Why do they do it, because it often times works. Am I throwing my hat in the ring for it... NOOOOOO not right now. The times it has occurred it happened organically. I'm not running up to guys offering to mentor them, besides being cocky that's also a yellow card... Also regardless of sex, please make sure to be as serious and committed to your growth and progression in this as the person(s) you select or connect with. Think about the time, research, and sometimes money, they are investing in YOU for no reason other than that of helping you. Don't allow them to waste their time, because a day will come and it'll be your turn, and I'm sure you don't want that done to you. Take notes, take heed, take stock. In other words, chew on everything they're sharing with you. I'm not saying take what they say as gospel, but also you shouldn't end up asking the same question over and over. You shouldn't get stuck owning a girl after a couple days of talking and wonder why you want to release her after 5 because you realize she's not what you desire. Also, I know some people (myself included) are sometimes rough on those who do online only, but it isn't necessarily a bad way to start out and get your flow going. I guess I have said all I desire to on this topic. One more thing, please before you try finding a girl, or a mentor, or an assistant, do some of the work and research on your own, and if you aren't passionate enough to do that, you may in actuality be kinky or freaky or actually dom / sub but just a little unmotivated and there's nothing wrong with that, but find out before allowing someone to invest that time in You.

11/12/2014 10:16:36 PM
OUR DEPTH PT 1
As you taste my lips, our nipples begin to harden
Your fingertips, caress my trimmed, secret garden
You toy with the grape, my moans are starting
To, slowly escape, “my little one, pardon?”
Is all that you say, as your manhood hardens
I love the way, it feels when it drips
Onto to my face, tummy, breasts, and of course my lips
I yearn for its taste, you deny me it
I begin to twist and shake, I don’t want to resist
I know soon you’ll take, your special deep dip
When you do you’ll be thanked, see, to me that’s a gift
Not the penetration, the passion in the midst
Not the fornication, the love, it represents
Although I know you’re patient, and initially opted, to hold it
The silent communication, taking place while we sync in
Is nothing short, of truly, epic
Please it’s not a typo, SYNC, is what I meant
I’m not at all a nympho, but I love the twist
When we’re no holds, intertwined
Just…
Like…
This
If I’m the one you find
We’ll share… A chemistry, eclectic


11/12/2014 6:48:18 PM

Lol there's guys still running around thinking free slaves dont have a choice of what type of Master they choose to serve. Lol i tried explaining, as long as a girl is free she has a choice. I mean if slave couldn't choose who they served can you imagine what craziness would happen. lOl so easy to spot a rookie sometimes. Shrugs. I'm glad to see new people but just because someone is new doesn't mean they mentally have to be a rookie or with no research under their belt. "true" this or that is usually a dead giveaway lol. My amusement for the night. It's becoming a weekly thing, as soon as I express a guy is not my type I'm told "you're a sub not a slave" I wanna fire back with you're a dick not a dom" but I just move on, their open is just that, theirs.  So many claim on their pages they can a handle a "not interested" but when they get it, there's a response of why or you should anyway... So can you guys really blame us for deleted read? unless these guys are thinking actual back in the day cotton picking slavery and in that case.... Would there be this site, I think not.


11/9/2014 3:38:34 AM

I'm okay... I'm just not sure what to do or who to turn to right now. What says I have to turn to anyone? Its ok right? To feel so scared of the future that you just want to freeze time. To miss being happy with a man so much that you wonder if you ever really had a totally healthy relationship. To wish for growth, peace, and tranquility some much that it has you up at 6 am trying not to cry... For a little it's agonizing, for a lady, its overwhelming and underwhelming, for a middle, it's... Life. So what sides can I be with the best result? I really came into all this seeking a dom to grow for, trust, and serve, not expecting the hurt that followed... I am not stuck in past scars, but I wonder often if scars and knowledge here and there is all I'll have to show from this"experience" of the life I have once found peace and identity in. Is it all worth knowing I belong?


11/6/2014 8:06:30 AM
Lol a dude can't even put his real age but he wants a real girl LOL of the day

11/6/2014 8:00:10 AM
As I see a younger couple blossom it makes me smile. Reminds me of how great it feels at 22 to trust a man to keep you safe and even handle your finances, to protect you. I miss those days, but I am happy for my friends that have those days right now, cherish them.

11/5/2014 12:40:32 PM
 . . . . . HaPpY BiRtHdAy!!! Hkng

11/4/2014 9:54:20 AM
i am NOT a tinkerbelle...

11/3/2014 7:11:36 PM
Shrugs oh well

11/2/2014 2:46:45 PM
horny, needs spanking, must have spanking, muat be controlled. needs structure, must have direction. mmmmmmm wants to have it, give it, take it, receive it. oooo. anyway i gotta go

10/29/2014 11:07:24 PM
Just read about a slave on here sleeping with her ankles chained... Gosh I miss that. I rarely talk about my past experiences in regards to actual lifestyle actions, but I miss that a lot. I dont recall if I pleaded for it but I know we discussed it... Then when it happened... I just, idk.... I remember being back home and not having the weight of it... I remember not having something to stop me from going too far from "home". I remember someone seeing me and looking so curious. I miss that. I miss those physical reminders after mentally knowing I was owned. She wrote about lashing out and receiving her correction... I remember saying things I shouldn't have, then he would land on top of me to correct me. Again I rarely share any of that because I know people have their thoughts... And assumptions... I also know there are crazy people and if the person still read this he'd probably make me remove for that reason alone. Being owned is like... Sex... Sometimes it hurts, sometimes its confusing, sometimes you wonder what's going to happen, you smile, frown, scream, but you know it's what you crave.  

10/29/2014 1:33:01 PM
I was asked today if I was irritated about not being owned... I gave a pretty detailed explanation basically saying if simply being owned was my desire, that wouldn't be hard to get. It's not just being owned... I want to click... I need to click... I want to have that deep connection in regular things and kink things. I want to know the person has my fricking mind before they are even close to my pussy lol otherwise nothing we do will mean much. I need to know they are capable of protecting me from them first, and giving the transparency and genuine vibe they speak of. I can't tell anyone how to get my mind (I'm not a Dom... STOP LAUGHING I'M REALLY NOT!)  Once I have time to get a vibe for someone if I don't feel their dominance it's usually a done deal. If I do feel their dominance and we have chemistry, but realize they're an a-hole... It's a sad day in history because I know it'll be AT least 4 months before that click appears again with someone else lol. So no, I'm not irritated that I'm still unowned... It's a choice to wait until someone I click with appears, and then after that it's the hope that they're mature enough not to hide things or tell useless lies to ruin the click, or level of respect I have for them. What irritates me is the amount of "masters" or "doms" who lie, hide, and play games all in the name of having an ego stroke or more than one girl, instead of just being grown men and being real and upfront about their actions. I'm sorry but I have enough to work on with myself than to follow someone who looks in the mirror and can muster up a smile while doing underhanded things. I'm not going to make it a race thing, because I don't like when doms do that... But I will say black men saying black women aren't submissive is about as accurate as black women saying black men don't know how to live without cheating on their wives and beating on their women. It's not race... It's the person...

10/28/2014 10:00:24 PM

Sigh... I don't wanna talk sex stuffs if I don't click... Yea I know, why talk after midnight if you dont click. :-( why can't people click with the people who genuinely want to be their daddy dom and would be good to them? Why is my mind so fricking hard to get control of for many? Why do those who get control of it not value it while they have it? Oh well.... Now I have to figure out if a situation that I can already see what will happen is worth it. To the half decent guys... If a girl already explained that you two didn't connect lifestyle wise, but you still wanted to meet her, would you understand if it ended up a one nighter or weekender and you never heard from her again or would you rather keep a healthy friendship and wait for your feelings to die even though it leaves you feeling denied? Usually I'm just asking randomly or out of curiosity.... This is a bit more serious so genuine opinions please.  


10/28/2014 8:58:45 AM
Sometimes a person's way of saying goodbye, is to make a promise that you both know they can't keep. if that happens, let them make it, and you both carry on in your separate directions without skipping a beat.   

10/27/2014 9:21:09 PM
i gon go night night... :(

10/27/2014 8:11:31 PM
awwwwwww this one guy got the cutest little lady from Russia and they've been married for like 10 months. They seem so cute and she soooo seems like a little lol. If it wasn't for them being married I'd actually think they were happy.

10/27/2014 7:29:15 PM
I'm watching my online bride... (I'm not really into tv especially at night so idk) these guys from US and UK search online and meet these women hoping for the right one. Before that I was watching another show, 90 day fiance where people from foreign countries come here after getting engaged. For the girls, all I'm thinking about is their safety or lack of... I get hmm not many maybe 5 genuine messages a month from guys in foreign places saying how taken they are with me and wish I'd consider visiting... Sigh, sometimes I wish I would too, but I just know it wouldn't be safe. Now if I'm already there traveling (which in the upcoming year is actually quite likely because I'm planning on using my passport a lot more) that's cool, but not otherwise. Funny thing, most of these guys on tv are looking in China and Ukraine not here, which I can understand because many have assumptions about American women but anyway. How wouldyou get a girl comfy enough to come to where you are or host you coming from another country? What are important things to consider when combining lifestyle and International? These shows weren't even lifestyle and I was already apprehensive...

10/27/2014 11:12:48 AM
Just made a very yummy rosemary tender chicken recipe for teriyaki stir fry. I'll leave it for the parents. One day (in a babygirl voice) mi gonna gets a daddy to make yummy stuffs for yep yep. I sampled a few pieces, quite JUICY

10/26/2014 9:34:41 PM
Watching my 5 wives and it's actually a good show. One wife said after all the years together communicating and stuff like that still sucks. They all 6 prayed together and although I'm no longer the good little Christian girl, I haven't touched my bible consistently in a while (still probably know and live better than so called Christians lol) if I go into a situation with a man and 3+ women, call me crazy but he better have a strong bond with God or Buddha, even Allah. To handle me and all those others his faith might do well to be centered on more than his own capabilities, and I still wouldn't be a "wife" this guy is at least 45 and did something SOOOO stupid and immature he's like that's the closest I've come to losing a wife... L O L! With me I wouldn't have been close to leave, I would have been OUT of the house lol. Grown men doing immature things is physically nauseating  for me. besides that, I could work with. I'd just want no marriage and mandatory poly classes lol

10/25/2014 4:51:35 PM
tears my tooth hurts

10/24/2014 6:44:54 PM
So after looking online I found a total copy of something that was very special to me. I just don't know if I should get it or not because what made it special wasn't really the thing, but the situation I guess. I don't want to get it and then not be happy, but I also don't want to not get it and then wonder what if. Any thoughts...

10/24/2014 9:28:50 AM

10/24/2014 6:45:26 AM

Again men, LEAD BY EXAMPLE!  Shakes head, it's really NOT that hard. oFfer the path. But everyone is different :-). Lol heck even someone with dry humor has been able to deal with me, and people wonder why I say the Master and I should be compatible in general ways as well as lifestyle shrugs. if you can't handle my humor when your own profile opens the door for it. "kindly removes the stick and skips away."


10/21/2014 8:46:06 PM
I am getting a whole new respect for the few half decent Doms and Dommes on here because so many come in your direction with no clue of how to go about this and what it is their focus should be... I mean heck I've seen some do things I'd never dream of saying or doing... Rolls eyes, and they call me a difficult brat... They haven't seen nothing.

10/21/2014 8:39:59 PM
I just saw the biggest dingdong from this site and all I thought was ouccchhhh. I am just not a size girl I guess... Wait... That's a hell of a lie. But the one I just saw, that's a bit too rich for my cunt. Gives self new rule: no dicks above 10 will be entertained for ny penetration. LMAO and as I post this for some reason I had a random "no more invites" pop in my head. So nooo guys I'm not inviting cocks of any size, I'm just saying lol

10/21/2014 10:03:15 AM
I can always tell when a guy is accustomed to having newbies (which there's nothing wrong with, heck newbies in many cases are what I'd suggest because you don't have to undo any pain or past training but to me it just makes less newbies kinda side eye) they often say things like "do you like being told what to wear" "I'd have you in a restaurant with no panties" "i can lead you around on leash into a room" I repeat all this is cool. I'm mainly saying guys who ask it right off or even put it on a profile... But what's the goal? Like seriously, especially when first getting to know a girl. Do doms on here not know that all that is so TYPICAL? I'm not putting it down because everyone needs a grab every now and then for forgetting not to put on panties but, I don't know maybe I'm just difficult. Most unique thing I've heard so far is the guy in my bulk talking about spanking my thighs with a hairbrush and that wasn't unique it just happened to be something that hadn't happened to me yet. Sigh... I really think I'm probably just having spanking withdrawals so if this entry doesn't make sense maybe that's why but right now, I understand it perfectly, and considering that at the end of the day it's My little journal, I guess that's what matters, right?

10/21/2014 7:54:53 AM
Message from a french dude after I told him "i don't skype" not with people I know nothing about anyway lol. "That is what life is all about sweetheart ! starting things you never did before ! ;)
One thing no dom or master or daddy or whatever dominant man, like : stubborn babes, and stupid bitches. I am certain you are none of these, but hey, if you want one day have a real a true high quality master, either do not answer messages or answer properly.
"I don't Skype" is arrogant, stupid and nonsense. Because if you want to, you do !
so keep that lesson for another dom, and for you , and go suck your toes...."    And you guys wonder why sometimes we just ignore messages? LOL as I told him... If I belong to a man I usually do as I'm told, otherwise I do what I decide to. Lol just because it didn't go his way, he feels I didn't answer properly... ROFLMAO @ a dom who tries telling me to answer properly ALL THE WAY ACROSS THE FRICKING WORLD AND NEVER LAYING EYES ON EACH OTHER??? Boy please get outta here with that bull----..... *sips coffee*

10/21/2014 6:14:25 AM
if you start off tweaking rules from the gate, it's probably not a good blend... just me guessing here lol

10/20/2014 10:06:38 PM
holding a shirt nice and tight / just to remember when things were alright / don't want to forget sometimes, it's better to / she wanted his smile to shine, and for their bond to be true / she wanted, what she shouldn't have, as girls often do / in the face of resistence she laughed and chose to continue / now she sees she shouldn't have, but little greatness does that do / because her love still may last, while loveless ones do what they do / hopes the time will pass, and one will become who / shes always yearnd to have, where she can kneel, serve, love, care, and prove /

10/20/2014 4:40:12 PM
If your message was recently deleted unread... It was either a) rude or extremely short or b) you landed in bulk (i delete bulk occasionally unless i see something interesting)... If you're under 35 and over 55 or a sub male you land in my bulk folder. c) If we chatted on here every once in a while but didn't really link or anything I'm just really not in the mood for cyber "chit chat"... There are associates / friends that stay online but not from cs, sorry.

10/20/2014 8:10:16 AM
an interesting dom once said "maybe wake up my Black Brothers..... Maybe we need to take a look in the mirror and understand what kind of attitude we helped create in our sisters, daughters and spouses before we complain that Black females arent really submissives because they are too demanding" - sometimes people should be reminded of their own advice because years pass and they forget.

10/19/2014 5:25:45 PM
Tonight peyton proves!!!!

10/18/2014 7:02:16 PM
at this moment a year ago... I was warm, comfy, and safe :) *pours out some fruit punch* lol

10/18/2014 4:54:06 PM
First impressions mean a lot. As people we are who we are and no one is perfect but sometimes first impressions stick and can ruin possible greatness. Oh well. I'm sure most peoples first impression of me is either that I'm super prude and have no place here or that I'm a total b who is accustomed to getting what I want and that's why I'm difficult. Neither would be true, but I understand everyone's right to their impression and I hope people can understand mine. I have flaws, I have struggles, I have things about myself that I can not change but try darn hard to change the things about me I can change if I am shown they can cause issue. I guess I'm just saying, just because someone doesn't wanna settle doesn't mean they seek perfection or feel they are perfect. I hope everyone is having a great weekend... Mine isn't as great as it was planned to be earlier in the week but it's alright.

10/18/2014 3:26:49 PM
hmmm hairbrush on inner thighs... Never had that one. lovely idea. Thanks for the msg. Why no reply... Cause I don't know you and sharing stuff like that already makes me run away. This is one of those "i want my daddy" moments lol the twisted thing... If I had one he'd read that message and then do what it said lol I'm silly right? and noooo not a bio daddy.

10/18/2014 10:49:04 AM
He asks: why would you want to sleep on the floor
She answers: who said anything about what i want?
he asks: would you want to sleep on the floor.
She says: I want to please my Master.

 I made that little thing up because, I want to show how some of our minds work. Now granted I have expectations, and granted if I don't belong to you, I'm NOT going to care all that much about what you want, but when people ask me questions involving what I'd want or like, I realize I can't answer (and most who know me know I'm full of answers, maybe not the right answer but I'm full of answers) questions like that I can't really think on.

 I was asked last night by a good friend (along with other questions) what is a sexual fantasy of mine... I know it could have seemed I was dodging it but I really don't have any, when single or without that leading force. So when it's asked my mind goes blank or to the sexual ideas that my former and I had in mind, and I don't picture those things happening with someone else, so I don't see a way to share those fantasies because they aren't "general fantasies" and even those were still linked to the person's pleasure.

I've also been asked what fantasies have been fulfilled... I can't really say, any. Because I'm not in this to make fantasies. Some things took days or weeks for me to even ask myself if I enjoyed or not because I was in the moment.

There was something I requested, and it was done, and well even then I can't say my enjoyment was my focus. I was happy because I saw his manhood rise while he did it and I'm not sure if he had expected that. So I guess if that counts, I enjoyed it, but I still don't see a way to share that. Heck even sharing the exact thing on here would be dangerous because there's crazy people out there and I can see it now "well i don't know her but I did it because she put on a site that she enjoyed it" ohhhh noooo.

10/18/2014 8:46:31 AM
falls over giggling promises to corrupt and pervert me.... Ummm Well the corrupting part... You're about 2 years late. The perverted part... googles perverted because I never saw it being used in reference to myself adjective: (of a person or their actions) characterized by sexually abnormal and unacceptable practices or tendencies. I don't get it... I mean who can really define what normal or acceptable is? I wasn't raised to say something is wrong based on society's view. I do have morals (some that frustrate even me lol) but I feel if I called myself "perverted" or say someone "perverted me" it's me saying I match my sexual experiences up to society and... I don't. Now corrupting is a bit different. I'm sure people know the actual definition of corrupt but sometimes the lifestyle and our definitions can make us forget, verb, to alter from the original or correct form or version. In the lifestyle we look at it as exposing one to things they wouldn't normally think, pursue, or enjoy, and I can totally say, I've been corrupted lol. That's not a bad thing. No one is perfect but I ASSURE you, I was not corrupted by someone hitting me with a message saying "I'll corrupt you", now hitting me with a cane... yea hehehe

10/18/2014 8:08:52 AM
Some doms have great profiles... They forget to add one key area... Na ni na ni boo boo, I'm not saying what it is LOL. But they'd attract much more chicks (including me) if they added it.

10/17/2014 9:24:23 PM
I saw an entry 10/17 asking what to do if you love someone you shouldn't. My advice, stop telling yourself you shouldn't.... Just because you love them doesn't mean you have to act on it. Do what you should and love them from affar unless the day comes when its OK for that love to be expressed. If you have love then left, show it, give it, bask in it.

10/17/2014 7:16:31 PM
nooooo smh people are funny tonight... Just because I dont wanna dip in a marriage doesn't mean I want one of my own you strangers... I believe marriage is the number cause of divorce.................... I don't know one happily married person and PUUUUHHHLEASEEEE don't tell me how happy your dad, best friend, uncle, brother, or boss is while married because guess what You don't know every nook and cranny. You don't know what they do, think, feel, say inside. Hell I know two sets of siblings one set related to me and one set I've only seen that would say "oh my parents have problems sometimes but they've been together for blah blah years." and guess what? I know for a fact both sets parents have cheated and will continue to do so LOL. I get back in the day when ya knock up some chick and try doing right by marrying her but even then you know if you're marriage material or not and so does she LOL. It's 2014 so that doesn't fly anymore. All I'm saying is... I like knowing whoever I'm with we can both just BOOM hasta luego? I think it is... I'm not all for running away from relationships but lol the breathe of fresh air knowing ya don't gotta go to court to end something is fricking beautiful! And to my friend about to get married girl I still love you :) and respect your choice. Yours isn't regular marriage so I can dig it.

10/17/2014 5:36:51 PM
NOOOOO I don't want to be an online sub sheeeeeeesh I give kudos to those who can and those who do online out of respect for real life situations, ACTUALLY I commend you!!! But it's just not for me. ADDED: Okay I was just reminded... I do sometimes "cyber steal" fun peoples articles of clothing or randomly "bite you" so.... Yea that's about all that'll happen and yes I do return the belongings, but first... Ya gotta chase me :)

10/17/2014 5:14:36 PM
It's funny... I remember leaving a relationship and the guy said "what about all our plans" the thing is, we made no plans. No future vacations, no future children (which I don't mind), not even a picnic for the springtime... It showed me how we were really in two different worlds. But, when you do actually have plans, and ideas, and hopes, and dreams... That "crap" HURTS. Like really HURTS when ya gotta leave it. It's like the Jackie Collins book you were reading last month that accidentally ended up at good will and is now probably long gone (no I don't read Jackie anymore) it is like New Years without hearing one firework. It is like.... The country with no crickets. I was talking a friend about her past relationships and it just had me thinking.

10/17/2014 4:07:14 PM
I promise I don't scare easily but oooooo some of you Doms have some frightening names! Call me judging if ya want but seriously, sometimes I ignore a message based on the scary name alone. *runs to a stranger for cuddles* lol wait wait that's bad...

10/17/2014 1:48:55 PM
To answer the question of why no married men... To make a long story short... If she's not in the lifestyle and doesn't know you are, one day there will be a choice to make whether it's about something little or big, it will be her you choose. You can mention all the problems or make her seem however you choose, but at the end of the day, you'll pick her and the one you don't choose will be left with less than what they came in with. I know life can't always be fair... But I can be fair to myself, and that's My focus. As for any married guys I chat with as platonic pals (which isn't many) we're totally cool, ya'll know that, but ya'll also know... I'm for the most part, right on this. So enjoy the weekend everyone.

10/17/2014 11:08:03 AM
Inspired by this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5C5JFDEGj8A

I don’t know why I do it, Kept putting myself through it/
When I know it’s the same game, same mind frame/
Like joining the crips when ya actually hate gangs/
Firm kisses on lips, collared, and caned/
Unique little trips, that really weren’t worth the pain/
To crazy angered fits, photos, messages, and stains/
My ripped sheets should have been it, but I maintained/
Now I’ve gotta get a grip, I’ll never be the same/
I gained some good tips, isn’t it strange/
How people repeat stupid, mistakes but still manage to hang/
On to some crazy hint, of hope for real change?/
I knew it all was a trick, but I refuse to call it a phase/
What makes the whole thing a bitch, is that I know a part of me will stay/
Right where it is, heart beating the same/
It is what it is, no position for me to play/
But we both gotta live, and I’m hoping it’ll be better lives via walking away/

10/17/2014 5:23:13 AM
Lol x videos is funny. Its a vid called my sub Linda... Only thing is, dude keeps jacking like he's not gonna keep it up or something... Eh well l o l

10/16/2014 9:30:42 PM
Yall wanted it shorter ya got it.

10/16/2014 9:13:09 PM

Odd conversations... Why be with someone if you dont trust them? Cause ya like them. Why aren't ya with them if you like them? Cause ya dont trust them.... Ain't life great?


10/16/2014 8:58:13 AM
I've gotta finish this book for class and unlike the other I promised myself I'd actually read this one instead of doing audible, so... I'm not going to be on here until I finish it. Stay sexy people, and have fun.

10/15/2014 6:30:40 AM
Today is a new day. People delete profiles and leave lifestyles everyday... I'm still not doing it. I still feel there's that person out there (maybe on here) who really wants to know me. Really wants to be straight up. Really wants to lead. I just have to be patient. When he comes, he'll be patient with me. Sigh... patience is a virtue. Yesterday was one of the saddest days  (in regards to men) I've had in my life. But, I didn't cry, I actually expected the possibility of it. I don't know if a break from all this is in order right now or if I just need to think positive. I am ok though. To the people who read this... I am ok.

10/14/2014 6:54:00 PM

Sometimes in life, you think you're making progress and two people finally understand each other. It takes others to show how wrong you were. I don't mind because it's all a part of growing. I'm not going to freak... But as I've said before... I expected men in the lifestyle would be more upfront and genuine, but I was wrong. It's sad, but I throw myself back out there I guess. Its ok


10/14/2014 5:29:08 PM
Think I'll go a year or two without sex and then give myself to someone special if I find the right person by then. Might be fun. We shall see. Only thing is long stretches like that have me crying like a virgin after the fact. Lol it hurts sooooo good.

10/14/2014 1:42:45 PM
Actions ruled by sex do no good bring no joy. If it does it is short lived. So doms think before screwing over the girl u say u love. Just be honest then get the sex. Lol

10/12/2014 2:16:47 PM
Netiquette and rejection... I've made this clear once and I will again...All girls, regardless of looks on here get a good amount of messages. Some doms feel they "deserve" a "no thank you" if we aren't interested... I'm not agreement with that. #1 We likely don't know each other and unless I am quite sure the message isn't a copy paste and that it actually took some time and effort, I am not going to go through the motions of a no thank you, because I don't owe you that, and it's not common courtesy because sites like this still aren't common. #2 Can you guys imagine how many times we do ACTUALLY say "no thank you" and are met with insults or efforts to turn that no thank you into an oh yesss? No I'm not a newbie but if I were I could not IMAGINE how much time I would have taken replying to every single message that I wasn't interested in saying no thank you #3 If you're really going through sent mail to send every girl that didn't "properly reply" to you some form of chastisement, *blank stare* and some say I take this too seriously well ya'll have me beat. #4 Believe it or not, on this site I have had a share of ignored mail... I have also had a situation where it took the guy months to reply due to not being on here often. By the time he did, I glanced his profile and remembered. I also took note that the message I sent back then was a simple "I like your profile" so in all honesty I would EXPECT a lack of reply because come on, where's the effort? When I have had that happen I didn't waste time by following up with a "you should be respectful" because guess what... It's THEIR box I'm writing into, and THEIR choice to respond or not. So, not intention to be bratty but although I do send the "no thank you" messages... I'm NOT going through extra effort to do it for everyone, especially if I can read a profile or message and see that I'm not interested.

10/12/2014 1:58:47 PM
lol this dummy just demanded pics when the fool doesn't even have ONE pic on his profile wow... just wow.

10/11/2014 5:01:16 PM

She lays flat sick of a battle. She lays flat drained from the days of yesterday that become the future, if she's let's it. She lays flat... Until a hand.... Reaches down, to help her rise. Once she does, that hand held out, gains strength, from her grip.


10/9/2014 7:51:03 PM
a girl doesn't have to dress slutty to do slutty things. Some of my most naughty nights have been when I was dressed sweet or nice. Some of my most shy / innocent moments come when much of my body is naughty or scantily clad. So..... Take your time, understand the girl.

10/8/2014 9:42:17 AM

So you have a girl and come by early from work to find her and her friend browsing naughty lines instead of reading like you told her to. Do you a) act like you don't notice and leave b) figure out why, then talk to her about doing better c) punish her and the friend too d) spank her in front of the friend make the friend leave fuck her like crazy and leave her chained to think about what she did and snitch to the friend's dom e) none of the above? Tell me then. I'm just... curious everyone picked D) but two people added B)


10/8/2014 7:22:53 AM
I'm soooooo craving stimulation... The only thing about hairless pussy is after you shave or wax it, you wanna play with it. Mmmmm then back in the shower lol. Why do some like making the girl sleep with juices on her lol. I think I'll shave lol  

10/5/2014 8:12:35 PM
Racing against the clock isn't the greatest thing to do. I just did, and although I'm pretty sure I did well it's not a habit I want to go back to. It's when I think for a moment about the what ifs. It's when I wonder about disciplinarians. It's when I really realize I am not a Dom. LOL Not that I ever desired to be one, but lately it's what I do with myself and it's how things get done. I know what it takes to handle me, and this was a week, that even I... Dropped the ball, big time. There is no, do over. There is no I'm sorry. There will be no, do better next time. My consequence will stand, my effort was lacking, and I can pay the price. The weeks ahead will be better, and I will get a bit better at what I do, regardless of how many days I rant about how I shouldn't have to. My advice... Do things when they need to be done, whether you want to or not. If you have that driving force in your life that pushes you and makes you push yourself, not just to take pain or not cum but to be the best you, you can be... Thank that person, by doing and being, exactly that, because it's not easy. Again, I'm glad... No, overjoyed that I'm experiencing this from both sides, because it validates what I value. It solidifies what I need. It reminds me of what I'd be grateful for. With this, I say, good night cs.

10/3/2014 7:41:26 PM
What's on my agenda? I get this question quite often from anyone who may message me with any regularity. I don't mind the question, but usually the answer is quite simple. My days consists of either working and studying, or reading, working out, and hanging with friends or fam in a nearby city. I think that's basically what we all do. We work, we learn, we live, we eat, we cry, we laugh, and we continue on. The only thing different may be, I make sure to grow food when I can, and focus on my submission, no matter if it's via a workbook, a few tools from friends to drive me loco lol, the kitchen, reading lifestyle books, or helping a dom pal or two outline things for their girls.

 Although many of us on here may be unowned, please don't think we aren't still working on increasing our submission or our skills. I want to be the best for whoever owns me, and if I am never taken again (with each passing day I come to accepting this as a possibility) my growth is not in vain, because it's what I need, want, and crave. I still have things to accomplish such as: getting better with make-up and hair creativity, increasing my passion and ability to read things I may not be interested in (my business class is helping with that), and maintaining my composure even when things are done that make my head want to literally pop off.

The above expresses that I have not "arrived" and to me that is a blessing, because when you arrive and know everything, the journey isn't as fun and there's not more growth to have. However, I have noticed in the past 4 months lots of progress in my self, my life, and my submission. It is something new for me, because in the past there was a lot of stagnation. I guess I was waiting for people to inspire and help me to do things, not realizing the one who needed to do things for me, was me. I was so busy putting others before me, so I wouldn't have to focus on me. I guess I'm now one of those people that I had always been baffled by. The ones who felt good and okay being single. Now don't confuse being good or happy "while" being single or unowned, with being happy that I "am" unowned... It hurts often that I'm not taken and under control, but if it comes it comes. I rather be patient and progression, than kept and stagnant.


10/3/2014 8:04:34 AM

Yucky, I just saw a pic with cum that looked not very appetizing to say the least. I guess it should be known I'm not a fan of thick stringy cum. I'm sure some are.


10/3/2014 7:18:21 AM

Can you go deep? While I sleep, please do keep. Exploring me, if I'm possibly, the kind of girl you'd keep, don't test the waters, make the rain overflow the creek.  Slow and then harder, entice me too scream. Why even bother with asking if I'm pleased cause you'll see it on my face, and feel it in my knees. You give me a taste, and I begin to cream. Oh I love the tongue like I love the wild thing. Don't have to be hung, handle me mentally, and that will be enough, give it a try, you'll see. I've been waiting to receive love since about 19, so if you have enough and see something in me. Feel something in my touch and crave an s type to treat, you as more than a kinky bump under the sheets, as more than a ticket enabling her to eat, then maybe it's the time, to try something, unique.


10/2/2014 9:27:59 PM

My lips right there where you see them in your mind. Your fingers in my hair other hand on my behind. You smack it, like in your fantasies. I never thought, you'd fantasize of me. The breeze in your face as you lift mine to kiss. My knees slightly shake due to, to the moment's bliss. Shall I go on? Let me know, my passion can show, it all....


10/1/2014 7:17:17 AM

Today is a day I just want to lay in bed and cry (i appreciate the "whats wrong" messages that may come but I'm not journaling this for sympathy) but i am not going to stay in bed. The past few months i have been making forward strides toward being the person i want to be, I'm not going to stop that. Right now i feel like appreciating the few in my corner. I feel like it's ok to keep going in a good direction. I feel it's ok to keep putting myself first. If thr time comes for me to put someone first in my life i will but I'll still be first to them and if not, to me. I get life is learning, but at 28 there's some things i have no time to waste and other things i have plenty of time to spend on. I'm glad i don't have many obligations right now, and the commitment that i almost had would have been cherished, it just wasn't the time. So I'm thankful for the good in life. thankful for lessons and knowing how some people function and what i need to see. i told a man a short while back... I still want to be your friend because I'm not perfect and although the friendship didn't last it reminder me what i function with when i care for someone. My advice, make sure your head and your heart have a conversation instead of just using one to think. Use common sense and emotion not just one.


9/29/2014 8:56:12 PM
Smh never cease to amaze me... Good night cs

9/27/2014 6:30:25 PM

I no feel good... And no dirty messages won't help lol. Maybe a bubble bath and candles.... And a bratz movie


9/27/2014 11:59:48 AM
I'm not scared, but I'm big on mutual effort. You want my direct info, cool make me wanna give it to you. Make me believe we could be interested. Make me inspired to get to know you. I have no issue with messengers, but let's get away from instant gratification for a moment. Go to a time when email was exciting, appreciated, and about learning. Some are so quick to hit yahoo. And often guess what happens? Can I get pics? What got you into the lifestyle? Or worse off, the communication totally stops and I end up removing them. Lol we can do all that junk right here why go to another chat for it? I'm not saying men that approach me aren't quality. I'm saying the few I associate with didn't get there by one liners and asking for pics. They didn't get there by saying things that typical doms say such as "I'm not the typical dom" l o l! they didn't get there by having the phrase that has become so overused because of subs being so happy to see a dom put on a profile "its not all about sex" or "I want to get in your mind" can you IMAGINE how many times a day we hear, read, or see that with hopes of it getting our attention... I'm not the best, but im authentic and real, striving to improve. Most of the people in my circle should complement that, especially a man wanting to be a potential. Please don't think I'm full of myself because again, I am not the best, but I strive to be the best me, and need that fostered. I admit my mistakes, I try to be understanding, and I rarely settle. So, if that is something you can roll with, give me proof.

9/25/2014 3:46:46 PM
Everyone isn't going to act like me and that's a good thing. Everyone isn't going to share my views or my strict focus on morals, and that's fine. Everyone isn't going to be able to tell themselves off for falling below their capabilities like I can and do. But as I get older I struggle with not being overly judgmental and still staying true to myself. It is not easy but I am making progress. It's a daily lesson and I thank my associates here for helping me to stay open minded, but more importantly open hearted. If you confide in me, my mind may not always be open or interested, but I can promise, my heart will do it's best to hear and comfort, the best I can. I'm not perfect, but I am a good woman, not because of lack of mistakes, but because of admitting those mistakes, and genuinely avoiding them. If that's enough for you, then I welcome you into my circle. I am blunt, I am silly, I am shy, bold, sensitive, and strong among other opposites, but in the end I'm human, I'm a girl, and I am real. Many use human as an excuse. I use human as a challenge, to be a better, not to excuse myself for not being the best.

9/24/2014 4:17:12 AM

My head hurts... I had dreams that confused me.... And... Well... I don't feel good.... I want...... Cuddles


9/22/2014 3:20:20 PM
You don't need to open doors, go ahead go first/
They might chase you more, but when you wanna be served/
The girl that you adore, rocks wedges and mini skirts/
They get slutty as you like, all I'm gonna do is smirk/
Cause they come out at night, but I'm in, the sun's burst/
Starkist, for you, leaning back check out the birds/
After what I've been through, with the past and others/
You say all you wanna do, is show me my true worth/
That sounds pretty cool, just stay real, and if I come first/
That would be new, but that position wouldn't hurt/
If I'm yours, go ahead and use, train, teach, and smack my ass if I flirt/
You seem to have a clue, about making sure that a leash, don't swerve/
Take a hike with me, sex on blanketed earth/
Spin some nights with me, or snatch me up and make me urs/
Keep it right with me, and I promise to stay sure/
You'll have loyalty, affection, and ears that always have you heard/

9/22/2014 7:34:17 AM

9/22/2014 7:20:41 AM
a cool little app https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X0CIhdDbChY :) just trying to help the good people out there

9/22/2014 7:06:49 AM
Girls, if you're told to delete your profiles on ALL bdsm sites... You need to do a double take. Shrugs, there's a reason lol. But the reason is about to go POOF :)

9/22/2014 5:59:26 AM
A friend posed a question... I pose it to anyone reading. If the special one for you appeared with a clean slate, they've never hurt you, and all they want is a chance to show they will do their best by you, is it ok to make them share you? I feel like it just depends but if someone who never hurt me didn't wanna share me... I don't see how they'd be a position where they'd have to. Either theyd have me or they didn't.

9/21/2014 10:15:43 PM

Just because you don't get a response right then, could mean anything... Don't get discouraged people, more to the subs. Also, to the doms, if a girl wishes you the best and you two part, the one or two for you are out there, you dont have to keep trying with her. I'm not sure where some things may or may not lead, but if it's positive I welcome it. If it's not, I'm totally informed of it, smh, as Always, and just because I may not speak of it, doesn't mean I haven't seen of it lol. I think I have like lifestyle angels looking out for me sometimes, showing me what I need to see, solidifying my initial notions, making me better. It's a Blessing. :-D so let's make this happen people.


9/19/2014 7:58:43 AM

Look at me and see passion, see my body begging and asking / you to do what should be done then ask you what happened / put me in the zone, let me stand alone / before you while you touch me I moan / I'd be lucky if home, was right with you let me melt your heart of stone / drop the baggage, bring you / no acting, be true / I need, genuine care to consume / me, and caress me so smooth / your neck touches my boobs / your dick slides between two / thighs, and you can see that I might want you / grab my throat and groove / I was hoping to, start something new / with a few, but untrue / if anyone can change the game, something, authentic not the same / then do it


9/16/2014 6:19:31 AM

I expect too much in return, to call my submission a gift. My service might be a gift, my unconditional love has always been a gift, but my submission as a whole is not a gift, it's an exchange, that's why they call it D / s. Give domination, and get submission. To me to the D comes first because it's the leading role, the s is next because it, follows the D's example. That's how you get my submission. People sometimes ask "how do I get you" well that's how, offer me an example that I'd be driven to follow. If you are the one, it won't be hard.


9/15/2014 9:15:16 PM

It was a lovely shower as I listened to the rain / all that was missing was the power of a Dom who loved my frame, my age, my skin, my taste / who would always do his best to be real and not fade / the truth usually comes out and he'd know I know things / but until he arrives I guess I just play / cry, chill, hang, I've become so many things I had no desire to be / all in the name of the quest, for a Master who loves me / and still, I fail, miserably.... Sigh, it's not surprising, good girls rarely win, but I still bounce back and hope, for a genuine caring him / good night cs... Have my info? Reach out, but leave the games, pointless lies, and drama at the door.  sometimes people are so full of it no matter what you do. It's vomit worthy


9/13/2014 8:06:38 AM
Guys, t shirt and panties, for just around the house? What do you think? I know most Doms want their girl always naked, but that gets old... It's like where's the fun and spice... I just looked on VS and some of the Tee's didn't match the panties but eh well. Is mitch match "in" now? What do ya think?

9/13/2014 6:13:54 AM
I want............. . . . . . .  Gimmie! **please** lol

9/10/2014 10:48:59 PM

What do I look forward to most? The simple stuff, making us dinner, meeting each others families, bedtime stories, vacations just to the country or all the way to Rio, munches together, working out together, gardening together, him seeing the welts he made heal, me seeing him grow in his pride regarding me. Perfecting rituals and protocol, teaching others our lessons, and even when we slip, not letting each other fall or give up. I'm hopeful that one day, it'll happen.


9/10/2014 10:29:43 PM

Sometimes things take time... Since I have been waiting and not really searching a few possibilities have appeared, but still not that spark yet. My friend and I talk about it sometimes, and she shares my desire for that spark, that butterfly in your tummy, those fun connecting feelings. One day, I'll have them again, but at this time, the spark is not as huge as it use to be... Thank the past, both relationships I've had the spark and been in love with didn't last. My focus for round 3 is longevity and stability, growth, and transparency. Not quite in that order. I guess I have to really stay true to myself and my needs. I've had men allude to me taking care of them... I have weaknesses but, isfj I'm a nurturer, caring for a man is one thing I can naturally do, but I have to see in that man what I need. I say all that to say... I'm patiently waiting. But when he comes, I'll be prepared as I can.


9/10/2014 10:10:56 PM
As for name calling... As long as I'm unowned, NO ONE AT ALL will be welcomed to calling me any type of name, that could be taken as degrading or offensive. If I am comfortable with it, I'll tell you... It doesn't do anything for me without something behind it. If I let it slide with one I might as well let everyone do it... And I'm not ready to do that.

9/10/2014 8:36:05 PM

S types, if youre in or near MI, and seek an attractive Caucasian Daddy Dom, who seems genuine from here, then message me and I'll send you his way. He works away from home, so it's a plus if you can roll with him.

Also to the Oregon girls, if you're decent and fun... And like tape lol let me know, I'll hook you up with dug lol but be prepared to feel the wrath cause I'll jack you up.

Texas girls, if you like chocolate, 55, does what he says he will (know this for a fact) new but very kinky, then let me know. Vetted and divorced.

Why haven't I snatched any of them up... I'm looking for something particular, and distance is a pain too.


9/10/2014 8:28:08 PM
Contemplating climbing in bed alone to read sleeping beauty. Yea I know, lol totally screams daddy wanted lol. One day, but anywho, ya'll know the drill... I want..........

9/9/2014 11:31:58 AM

NOte to newbies, s types don't always dress slutty... If I'm doing mundane tasks please don't expect me to show my ass all the time, sigh. Besides, what's the surprise to spectators if they always see it? And yes, if I belonged to someone I'd dress as told but... I don't. I think sometimes guys lead girls into lying about what they're wearing just to get their dicks hard, example "oh i bet you're wearing short shorts that show your ass cheeks and a belly shirt, aren't you?" most girls won't say "no" cause they're don't wanna ruin the fantasy. If you want the truth just ask or better yet, dont ask... Asking a girl every dang day what she's wearing is annoying to some of us. I promise, if I'm that into you, you'd already know because i would have either had you dress me in a round about way (which I've done long before i knew anything about the lifestyle, thank you very much) or I'd send you a pic inquiring about your opinion. Just trying to help.


9/9/2014 6:46:46 AM
Just saw a pic of a Domme that actually looks real. YaY

9/8/2014 8:47:09 PM
I want....................... Some of you know the rest lol

9/8/2014 3:11:44 PM
Sometimes recognizing what you should and shouldn't offer is hard for any girl, but looking at what you deserve makes it a bit easier. There's a common phrase and I have mixed feelings about it: never make someone a priority when you're viewed as an option... To me it's one of the dumbest phrases ever made popular lol. We are all options if available. I rather look at it like, when you see you're a priority act accordingly, when you see that you aren't make sure not to be. Be to someone what they show you, you are.

9/7/2014 9:44:07 PM
I get annoyed when doms do things but wanna slam other doms who do things just like or less than what they do. Be careful before slamming someone guys.

9/7/2014 8:22:51 PM

mental note, a lollipop makes some people horny even if it's only over the phone. Blank stare... Uh I don't even know how to feel about that, luckily I wasn't in little mode, I would have hung up lol. Word from little me, "I no likey talk about horny stuff if me no have those connections to the peoples" Goes to lay in bed, ouchy...


9/6/2014 6:53:21 PM

Gimmie... CUDDLES!!! Throws self on carpet... Kicks, screams, shouts.


9/6/2014 3:34:24 PM
How can some people be the way they are and do what they do? Very VERY easily... I guess

9/6/2014 3:15:37 PM
You can pound it for hours,  I'm not a fan of flowers /
I'm really not too picky, but fuck me, outside of trump towers/
Sprinkle on some baby powder, then tell me which sounds louder/
Your hand across my face, or my ass spanked with dom power/
You've got 2 slaves already, one calls every hour/
I'll make you spaghetti, then run your shower/
You think I'm so sexy, I'll dry you like a towel/
Pick out a new teddy, for me to wear and model/
Your dick's so glad you met me, it has your mind all hostile/  
So pretty please let me, show you how I fondle/
I don't think I'm that tempting, but you say there's no rival/
To my mental steam, pours out like lava/
Your other slave wants to lick me, and that's something I'll open wide for/
Now your set to hit me, cause you think that I'd want her a bit more/
I like it that you're stingy, you choke me, now my throat is sore/
You like it that I'm picky, I'm hoping, one day to finally score/
That Master that's real with me, just like this gent I've created or/
Somewhere near he's dangling, keys to this girl's collar/

9/5/2014 5:58:33 PM
Why do decent people with good hearts get the short end of the stick lol. All in the name of pussy lol. I need to take my own advice... If ya can't handle his ways break all contact and call it a day. I was doing great and not letting anything knock me down. Kiss the past goodbye hell I did that multiple times. And to the half decent doms don't leave someone to drop unless you really just don't give a f about them. Just advice.

OKAY: I'm leaving this here for the advice part but.... The person it's about is irritated and a good friend "somehow" assumed it was about him (which I don't get at all cause we never... um yea did anything) So to that friend... It's not about you, what you did doesn't involve me at all. To the person it is about... This was not posted maliciously. It IS how I feel and I stand firm on that, but if it bothers you, that was not my intent.
Back to catching my buzz night night
And my answer comes from "Krow" on here... he says ""Why do decent people with good hearts get the short end of the stick" Because we have good hearts." Why the hell didn't I think of that? If you mind me posting your name just go in my inbox and fuss at me everyone else is

9/5/2014 4:51:19 PM
Doing it on my own, as usual but it's cool I know how goes. Few days I'll be back to me, gotta be, again only myself to blame #turnup alright I'm good its life right? #turndownforwhat

9/5/2014 10:20:00 AM

There's many slaves and subs pretty and smart and I know that. It's not me, I'm cute and intellectual, people mistake that for smart but anyway... What I can do, what I have done, is love abundantly and obey as long as it was appreciated, as long as I was respected. I know one day, someone will appear, who doesn't just say they want it, but shows they want it. When that happens, I will be ready. Push ups anyone?  


9/4/2014 12:02:53 PM
Sometimes looking at the big picture is tough but, I gotta Keep doing it, if I don't, only myself to blame.

9/4/2014 10:04:24 AM
I want cuddles!!!!

9/3/2014 10:20:22 AM

Tip for the side girls, if he'll hide you from the wife, he will hide others from you, I've had that fact repeatedly proven. so to the married guys wanting a chance besides it not being fair, that's another reason why I won't do it. Shrugs thank the past and to the I'm not him stuff, you're right you aren't because I'm not letting you be. to the girls be smart and follow the lead :-) do your thing.   


9/2/2014 10:51:10 PM
Sometimes in life, you may never know the real truth, you may never understand why, you may never be the same but, you can make an intentional decision to one day, love again, or not.

9/2/2014 10:24:50 PM
This isn't my blog that I'm linking to but I'm linking this post because I'm a Pisces girl and that's what the following entry is about. Most if not all do apply to me in the list of 25 things. http://thepiscesgirl.com/2010/10/25-things-to-know-about-a-pisces-girl/

8/29/2014 9:50:15 AM
Just realized... I always find people I deem compatible (at the time) when I'm not looking, and actually just lingering around. So, leans back, and throws on a broncos jersey. I still have to pick another team lol.

8/27/2014 10:10:29 PM

He said girl what do you miss? I miss cuddles and warm arms. I miss walking in the dark. I miss ass cheeks upon thighs. I miss the beats of a man's heart. I miss passion in a hair grab. Intensity in a backhand. I miss giving a bubble bath or walking upon the sand. He said, girl that sounds vanilla mixed with abuse. To me, it sounds like love mixed with enforcing rules. To me it sounds like fun with moments of lessons. To me it sounds like trust and a possessor possessing. To me it sounds like lust and bit of Heaven. He said girl, why did you go? I wasn't valued anymore, I often came last. What I was hoping for, lost it's possibility, fast. The appreciation died, adoration faded. The truth became a thing to hide, and we both lost patience. He said, girl what will you do? I will learn as i have. I will find humor, i will laugh. I will teach myself new things and work to strengthen the weaknesses i have. I will open myself slowly. I will ask about one's youth. I will do my best to insure, the next to own me, will see me as a beaut. I will give him what he shows he's due. I will hug him, hold him, be loyal and true. He said, girl are you ready? I will be when He appears. I will be when i know. I will be when my tears freely, happily flow. I will be, when i collapse, the way i did the first time. I will be when he slides in, i grasp around his neck so shy. I will be when i feel it in my gut. I will be when it's beyond sex or a good fuck. I will be when i feel comfortable enough. I will be when, he and i establish real trust. He said, girl are you okay? No I'm not okay, I'm a girl without a Daddy, a pet without a Master. I'm not okay or happy, I'm a pew without a chapel. A horse without a saddle, and no rider to direct. No King to serve, love, or allow me to submit.  He said, girl I understand. I cannot fix it I know. I hope for you that the man, you seek will soon show, but if he does not, do not run and go. Girl, your passion burns hot, don't let the frozen ones make it cold. I stood from kneeling down below. I forced a smile, and whispered, I promise, I won't.


8/27/2014 11:20:01 AM
Sigh... I think I'm going... To... Just... Sit and really see if I can bend on what I want... I can't but I will sit and try... I like cm or cs lol for... Well honestly I don't like it. It's good for making friends but I've been on here since July 2012 (I had another profile at first for the smartasses) i feel like I've wasted a lot of time even during the time i was owned and not looking, still a waste because it went nowhere at all 1 step forward 3 steps back (i know i typed the phrase wrong no need to correct me). Yea i gained experience but what's it worth? Right now i have 2 good friends from here dug and lady but as for right now and ultimately what i want. I don't have any leads on. There's a lot of people here who are decent but some of those decent people can't be upfront to save their life and in turn people who really do want something end up wasting precious years of life. its one reason why I'm so quick to let people know if we wouldn't work, and why. I know how it feels to be toyed with. Picked up and put down and I'm not going to do that to anyone. So what's my solution? threaten to leave cs like some i know, put the profile on hide and claim i left but still send back door messages like 2 i know lol, or do what I'm currently doing reading messages, browsing profiles, and seeing the same profiles pop up messaging me as if they forgot we spoke before. I'm at a loss right now but this site right now is more a frustration than anything. So why stay? Faith... I think of closing it and then i get a little burst of faith that maybe the one or two for me are on here. Who knows

8/26/2014 9:53:22 PM
My head hurts, its oxymoronic what makes it feel better but I will get through. Sweet dreams people. For those who find it ironic, inquire first for clarity on what actually makes it feel better before correcting me. But shrugs call it what you want both would actually apply lol

8/26/2014 3:21:37 PM
When I started in all this... I took my time. I sat back on another site and watched, read, learned. I gradually got involved in discussions, mingling, developing within my fetishes. I later moved to meeting Doms and doing a few things in real time. I don't think people have to do things exactly the way I do and I am genuinely happy to see the new people appear popping into the lifestyle. But some appear with no work, no effort, and no desire to put any in. Some (only men from my personal experience) even come in trying to "hide" that they are new to it all. It's usually obvious (trust me). I have no issue with new people but again, all of this takes time and focus and when I see people not willing to put it in for their own education, it frustrates me. It's more like they are just standing around in the dark, waiting for someone to turn on the light switch. I'll tell you where the switch is if I see you looking for it, but I will NOT turn it on for you. I hate to be rude, but seriously I am not going to continue getting involved or interested in someone's journey more than they are. Sit there, take your time or hell go fast if you want, but figure yourself out or get a protector or mentor or resource to help. Make your profile unique to you. Put your best foot forward. When I was a new girl to this I handled it alone a good while and gradually made a very few amount of friends I actually consider friends. I didn't expect a person to be available to me if I wasn't available to them (something else I see mostly with the new males, partly the ego I suppose). I guess I'm writing this for a few reasons. One, my own self expression. Two I'm hoping this will give some a reminder to handle their own destiny. Three, to welcome those who are really interested in being IN the lifestyle and LIVING it, and also wave to the ones just here for sessions and such

8/25/2014 8:29:17 AM

Lately I've been making good progress but I still ask myself, am I ready for all this again. I... I don't know. I am if the right one comes, but I am not looking forward to repeating the past, getting wrapped up in a Dom, for the truth about their level of maturity, actual life, or fear, to finally come out. The one possibility I could be ready for, even in 2014 the area I live in is clearly not ready. So, i wonder... Should i be on here at all, should i make my profile say friends only, should i be a b to everyone??? Yes, no, no.... But it's still not easy. I am going to keep going forward and focus on my life and lifestyle goals but it's not without some shakiness.


8/24/2014 9:27:27 PM

8/21/2014 6:45:54 PM
watching a documentary on the lifestyle kinda, and totally agreeing with the subs.
One girl "he was choking me and I hauled off and said hit me... and he backhanded me without holding back. it hurt my lip but it was like the heavens opened up"
LOL I totally feel her on that
omg he put her head right above the toilet and dripped the brush over her head... LOL
alrighty than...
I'm gonna need a drink after this because... well because... GRRRRRRRRRRRRR why am i watching this??? breathes in breathes out... It's ok, I'm ok, it's ok, l o l
now he's talking about how his girl doesn't mark easily anymore lol. She had to write because she got caught smoking... mauahuhauhauha. I'd never do a thing like sneaking cigarettes... Well that's a lie. I'd do it for the hell of it and I don't even smoke LOL.
ok I'm done... I can't finish this... Someone remind me to watch the whole thing when I'm taken lol.

8/20/2014 10:40:49 PM

I'm going to start saying "I bet you're a real 4 hole slut ain't ya" L O L

Why do dishonest guys pursue girls that stress how important honesty is to them?
Cause they want the stuff they do to trickle down. In Even big cities are in a small small world


8/20/2014 9:24:29 AM

Grabs my leash and says "get your little ass off collar space. Work or do your assignments" looks around... No nope doesn't really have an affect. But it'll have to for now :-)... Well heck I guess it does work! Invited to participate in a special business program just from a practice proposal but the girl is shy so idk if I'll do it. Gonna think it over. At a time I felt I couldn't push myself, when I lacked the drive, now that I can... I am! And while this, the girl is going for another certification. I'm really focused, hand is almost better. I can't believe I've dived into this like I have.


8/19/2014 12:16:14 PM
I don't like when people brag, butttt... Pats self on back for thinking up her first punishment for a Dom to use on his girl hehehehe. It's pretty good if I do say so myself

8/18/2014 9:24:36 PM
Tuesday night, there's supposed to be a meteor shower according to an article I saw. So if that's your thing, enjoy.

8/17/2014 1:23:50 PM
So I'm home... I had an ok time but I came back and trying to situate the spot... But anywho, I feel sooo picky... I have met two amazing people this month but I thought maybe I wasn't ready to get back open to a D/s commitment, well that's not the case because the girl was about to change profiles and everything lol, but I prayed "yes bratty angels do pray" and quickly I realized our senses of humor didn't connect, this weekend wasn't about finding a man anyway. But although the guy I ran into and I we have many things in common he was too humorous so... Another great friend. Rolls eyes...

If I thought a play partner or an online dynamic would fulfill me, right about now I'd jump all over it, but it wouldn't feed my hunger.
 The bright side, I'm readjusting to going it alone and setting up my own boundaries again, and verbally expressing what I am comfortable with. All that is healthy. It's not easy but it is better for me, and when the right Master comes it will be better for him. He won't have to protect me from people approaching me online or people that don't get the picture, because I've got my own big girl swag. All he'll need to do is protect me from him, and maybe bugs. A person's first challenge, is controlling self and as long as he has my back and can protect me from constantly being hurt in any way by him, I'm good.

That's also why I took away protective as a characteristic for a potential. I think most men have a protective instinct. He will know his girl may run to him for anything, but in the end she can handle things. Now if he just rather I not, that's sexy. I guess I said all that to say, being unowned right now is bitter sweet :).

8/17/2014 8:45:48 AM

When I'm gone don't drop a tear cause I won't see them. There's no reason to confess your true feelings cause then, you won't need them. There's no need to ask me why, you didn't ask while I was breathing... So when I'm gone, just continue... Being who you're being. I have no plans to die. I'm not down in the dumps, but who, ever plans those things? So show the ones you love... That you love them. Do your best to be as authentic as you can. So while we're all alive, we at least, genuinely understand. Who we are. How we feel. Who and what are actually real. Cause when it's all said and done.... there's no take backs, nowhere to run... Go forward while we breathe.... And when I'm gone... Smile, see the sun, feel the breeze, and think good things.
Inspired by: those who have loved, and then lost, and the ones who lost and then chose to love. Love before they're gone  


8/14/2014 10:10:50 AM

8/13/2014 8:11:30 AM
When I belong to someone, I'm what they want me to be if they seem straight up... I can't say if they are straight up cause, so few are, but I wouldn't belong to someone who wants a "lady in the streets but a freak in the sheets". Blame my past training, or my thrill seeker gene, or my thinking not changing just based on location. Please don't get me wrong, I'm extremely adaptive but if I wanted to be a lady in the street and a sub or what have you behind closed doors, I'd just go have a nilla relationship. I'm not saying I'll be a whore or embarrass you. I'm saying if I become yours... I'm yours, in restaurants, at the movies, in the grocery store, on the floor of your relative's house while they're sleep, in a public bathroom, at the carwash, library, and in the house. Limiting my service, hunger, or obedience to the bedroom would be YOU doing a disservice to yourself. That is all.

8/12/2014 7:25:24 PM
He calls me everyday. He holds me like no other. He doesn't hide anything, even if it's "slut go brush your teeth" or "I'm probably gonna fuck becky and buy brittany a bracelet." He looks at me with pride in his eyes. He's not cocky but he's sure I'm into him. He spanks me hard, kisses me gently. He kisses me hard and spanks me gently. The first is punishment or him just being him. The second is passion or a reward. He says things men in movies say but he doesn't know they say it cause he hates chick flicks. He's messy sometimes, he yells sometimes. He's shy about saying he loves me, so instead he looks at me kneeling on his knee and caresses my hair, or he slides his finger up my skirt while i bring him his food and he roars "mine". He's almost as interested in the life he's helping me create as I am in the life I focus on adding to for him. He only leaves my side at events to hang with his pals or see how shy i am without him. Even while doing vanilla things, he is in charge. He knows why I serve him. He sometimes chokes me when I flirt too muh even though it's by accident, then he takes me like a lion... This is just a little bit, but I just figured I'd share a little about the one for me wherever and whoever he may be.

8/11/2014 5:20:35 PM
A profile helps you get a jist and decide if you want to invest time or focus it elsewhere.

8/10/2014 5:01:09 PM

A guy with the name 1person but one is spelled out, decided to ask me why not Cali. I already knew it was a game when his location wasn't Cali LOL. So he's 23 and as my profile says he goes to bulk. I was bored so I responded to his question vaguely... Guess what lol the n bomb was dropped! Lol what else is new? It's the wannabee dom rendition of peeing pants. "I dont like her answer so let me see if this bothers her while I hide behind my PC" lol ok. Boys will be boys :-). Waves to all the real men.  


8/10/2014 8:17:09 AM
If you're doing fantasy football, you should know lol I'm gonna kick some butt on both sites! Draft over can you say MANNING again! first live draft, sigh of relief.

8/9/2014 7:47:19 PM
lol its amazing how many people engage in a fetish and have no clue of it, or are too shy to admit it to themselves... wonders what fetish she engages in without knowing... hmmmm let's ponder that. share yours if you dare btw i have a hot domme who keeps checking my profile but im shy i guess she is too... waves to her

8/9/2014 10:31:20 AM
I've made a decision! Lol I want a WEDDING!!! Now wait, before you get confused, I don't want to be married but I want my collaring ceremony  (one day) to function like a wedding. I wanna get all fancy, I want it like a walk to remember, a small wedding, by a real preacher and everything. Not in a church but No just an amazing, intimate, experience. I guess the Master would have to want that too. We shall see, one day.

8/9/2014 9:35:30 AM
I have a new little associate and l hope we become friends, she's nice. I have been figuring out things a lot on my own lately, which I've grown accustomed to. It's also motivated me to encourage others to do the same that I've done without a choice. Right now I kinda am confused and although my bud Dug has been a great giggle in my life, I know he has a life too. I just feel like... Are you ever single and unowned, honest and clear, but still feel... Guilty? I guess that's a part of my inner slave, that feels like "yes, woman in you still needs time to heal and form" but the slave just wants to focus on that one person... I guess, that focus just hasn't formed yet. So until then, I keep doing my best at being transparent. Typed it with one finger lol

8/6/2014 10:02:01 PM
I think I've had the best sex, and I've been in love twice! / I've had a daddy, dom, then Master in only 28 years of life / i consider myself fortunate, quite / had my share of bull shit, but tonight / I think it was all meant, and came in good time / cause before I'm 30 I'll get what some 50 year olds can't fathom / I can be a slut, so dirty, and still have your butt laughing / on my knees begging mercy, while you notice, there's nothing I'm capable of giving, that the one I serve is lacking / and everyday that I'm living, my focus will be making his smile happen / life might get tricky but if it does, magic will still zap in / with every bit of me I know the time for me to collapse in / to his arms, will come and my heart won't run / all the mistakes made will be to show us to do it right and that the past is done / I'm not searching I'm just waiting for the right one / my wait for his arrival has been full of lessons thus far, and quite fun /

8/6/2014 9:35:35 PM

Mmmmmm tp2, candles, let's vibe... I've got a sneaky grin on


8/6/2014 4:19:21 PM
heading down this month... will keep my ga people posted... and to the man in the black i will be expecting coffee.

8/6/2014 9:57:02 AM
Having former slaves doesn't necessarily mean they're your references. I'm sure many Doms have girls that maybe they weren't "horrible" to but they know they wouldn't refer anything positive, therefore they don't use them. So if I ask whether you have references or not, please try not to get defensive or an attitude. There's nothing personal. 

8/5/2014 9:53:31 PM
I need to ice this before I go to bed but... I don't wanna and I don't gotta *dances around* lol.

8/5/2014 4:35:31 PM

Lol calling a vanilla guy daddy in personal phone play is so funny.... Either they freak and you have to explain or they act like they can't hear you lol. Sigh, even if the lifestyle was just about sex for me, I still wouldn't happily leave. Heck, it's hard to even cum with a nilla guy let alone think of a relationship, but I promise the dude had energy lol he was "like round 3?" then I said to myself self any guy can have phone energy, then I thought and said no, not true but still. Lol....
Then sometimes, the lifestyle guys that get the kink of that don't seem to get the mental side of it. So then ya just sit there like giggle giggle, this might be a tough row to hoe and that's only the surface I'm not even talking about the balance of love and M/s. Lol ain't life grand? But guess what? For all it is, I still, love it, need it, crave it, breathe it, live it.


8/5/2014 10:08:14 AM
one thing of a few that i miss most about being someone's girl? The decision of no longer having to decide. :)

8/3/2014 5:17:29 PM
If you have to go to the doc do you realize how much a doc being super hot can help dull the pain. Then you leave like OUCH! lol

8/2/2014 8:27:15 PM
if you hate contemporary country don't click https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_KlRznM81Jw
First whole verse of this song is so accurate... lol I love it... Only thing that would have been better is if he had a pick up #carolinagirl lol

8/2/2014 7:41:46 PM
If you can’t help but wait, I guess I’ve gotta say thanks/
For giving me needed, time, to just sort out my brain/
You know pain I’ve received it, and had crossed many lanes/
I’ll always question why it was repeated, but I wonder if I hang/
Onto a bit of hope, will the right king come my way/
It really could be you, but what do I say/
I’m not looking for you to fail, I promise you that/
But in the past I’ve done well, just to still come last/
So it’s a shaky stage, maybe I just attract/
What I really don’t need, and I can’t take my past back/
I wouldn’t if I could, cause it’s helped me be better/
Take a chance, maybe I should, but maybe I better/
Not… I’m so clueless, really, I’ve never been through this/
But there’s a first time for it all, and I do like your lips/
This time I’m not planning to fall, if I love one day, someone better get/
Their hands ready to catch me and give my body a flip/
Over a shoulder to go off, into the sunset/
One day, but for now… I appreciate, your patience/
But again I say, I’m not counting on you waiting/
Don’t pass on good slaves, I hope you get what I’m saying/
Healing for some takes days, others take years, and still stand shaking/
I think I’ve dropped all my tears, at least I’m hoping and praying/
I’m happy I see things clear, and the few memories left are fading/
But in a way my heart is seared, but at least it’s done breaking/
I’m doing my part to be fair, and I hope you know how paining/
It is for me look into myself and see the toll it’s taken/
But I know it’s good for my health, to be as honest as I’m being, and make the forward steps I’m making/
If you’re there in the end you’ll see my smile shine/
If you’re gone in the wind, I’ll just know it wasn’t our time/

8/1/2014 8:35:28 PM
Forget six figures, my nails on your suspenders/
My teeth nice and white but sharp to remove splinters/
I’ve risked in the past just for wannabee hitters/
Take your hand smack my ass, pull my nipples like they’re triggers/
You run a company? Cool… Is that supposed to make me quiver?/
Can you handle me through, the year? I’m talking summer to next winter/
Can you grasp my mental, level and with one word, cause my cunt to shiver?/
Will I call you a tool and then a devil but still look at you with lust?/
Would your ballgag make me drool, collar metal, and me aching to cum?/
I’m just asking what would you do? Say you want me, huh?/
Well I don’t care about your la, move so I can run/
I’m just saying if you’re mula is supposed to get me struck/
I could truly not care less, money can’t buy my love/
And if it can’t get that, it won’t get me as your sub/
Yes Sir, my pussy is kinda fat especially for a lil one/
But don’t get hung on that, control isn’t within a fuck/

If you don't like rap don't click the link but the above was inspired by https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g7nZyc61eFo


8/1/2014 6:44:18 PM
You smiled… and I felt, the way he made them feel
You looked at me like I was amazing, I sat, hoping that look was real
I wanted to do so many things… I wanted to giggle and be glad
So that is what I did and… You let me do that
I still needed time to heal and I thought it was fair
For me to express and share that, just to be clear
I see now I wasn’t trusted
I see now, you were not, either
I see now that what I thought was right, wasn’t…
I need a breather, but I mustn't
That’s okay
I’m not upset
I just go back in my shell
One day it will occur and it will all be well
Until then, I’ll cherish the smile
The one upon your face
The one, while saying I was beautiful
Managed to open a small space
In my heart


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rCTc9sLguuc

8/1/2014 9:33:05 AM
Before it’s all gone or my memory fades
I must tell you that I love the way
I love the way your lashes come down and curl up
I love the way you whisper saying “girl, you know what?”
I love the way your love is felt in every single touch
I love the way your voice inspires me to not give up
Although I love it
I must ask
Do you?
Do you love the way you yawn around 4:15
Do you love gazing at the stars with those beautiful eyes shining
Do you love the days we lay in the grass in spring
Do you love that I believe, you’re capable of any good thing
If you do then thank yourself for always being my dream


8/1/2014 8:30:14 AM
Anyone ever notice Shrek was a cd? I mean look at his vest thingy and tight shirt and skirt? Explain that go ahead lol

8/1/2014 8:13:14 AM

Once upon a time there lived a little skittle... He was very cool, a blue skittle. One day he found a world of m&m's so he rubbed off his S and became an m&m until one day a brown m&m bit him because he said he wanted her to, as the m&m girl licked she tasted the rainbow and began to cry. She was allergic to skittles. The blue skittle vanished into the night and took some shell from the other blue skittle pals. He patched himself up and vowed to never let any m&m's get close enough to taste him ever again. Months later the brown m&m, melted in the mouth of the same blue skittle. He didn't know how it happened but his desire to be in the m&m world no matter what, made the yummy m&m's melt. Years later the skittles had almost taken over the m&m world because he invited and helped all the other skittles to get there. all that remained was a little sign saying we melt in your... the end


8/1/2014 7:44:04 AM
When a girl tells you sometimes she has a 6th sense... It's good to believe it a bit

7/25/2014 5:15:09 AM
So... Maybe people do read this *hides behind pillow* Most times when I write I'm doing it for myself... But putting it here makes it come "out" if you will... That's why sometimes it seems as one person here and I call it an "urgency". While i only write for me I do understand that some may read for the "poems" as they've been called, to me it's not but anywho. I just wanted to say sometimes, especially when stuff is going on in my life, it may just be regular releasing so i hope ya don't mind me being.... Human for a few :-).

7/24/2014 7:55:54 PM

I've experienced a lot, still my passion burns hot / my hunger is even stronger... The beat of my heart might skip a few beats but it doesn't just stop / it continues on, craving more than arms warm / seeking but waiting patiently, while practicing my form / I forgive instead of being, just another girl scorned / So many lessons in life but I'm so sure / I'm not alone in this craving but it's so much more / all of this journey is for / you to have me, so when you find me... I guarantee galore / respect, just dont lose it / neglect? No I won't do it / your dick, I'm not just screwing / your hits, more than just bruising? / my point? I crave the bond / two joint, and we form one / :-D to the future Master wherever you are   


7/23/2014 10:15:28 PM
I'm really not a brat... Wait, yes I am but not for no reason... If I ever love you... You'll understand how I am at my core and why I have to display a brat on the outside... Sigh... Goes to find a muse

7/23/2014 11:23:27 AM

I rarely talk about race but something that trips me out... The same black guys that dont wanna be seen as  just BBC the first thing in their font to girls of other races is black this black that, black black black black black... So how could they be expected to be seen as deeper or more? The same men have an issue if a black woman is open to white guys and lord dont let her be a raceplayer it's just horrible but not realizing getting off on being a black guy in charge of a white girl is the same. shrugs stuff that makes ya wonder eh. And no raceplay isn't my thing but I'm not going to front like I think its terrible while doing it in a reversed way. I have grown to love white guys just as much as black guys. So no you dont have to ask what race I'm open to. I'm open to good character... We'll look at the wrapper later, ya feel me *licks lips*


7/23/2014 1:31:32 AM
PSA to Doms, Daddies, Master, s types etc... Love isn't selfish, it doesn't hurt out of greed, love doesn't leave one to figure out things from lack of transparency, love comforts. Love doesn't use, besides in the lifestyle way. Love doesn't place lie upon lie upon lie. Love is real. Love doesn't create a world just to escape a real one. Love stands proud, love stands strong, love has no room for games or cruelty.... So many people claim to love but have no idea of the meaning of the word or what genuine concern for another it encompasses. So before someone says they love you or types ily. Look at your life... Were you a priority? Did they make moves or sacrifices for you? Did the truth come from their lips or did you have to figure it out on your own? Did they understand your desires and try to make sure they took place outside of sex? If not... Take that "love" with a big clump of salt. Don't say anything just smile and be happy that you... Know what love is. The above is only my opinion but there's some fact in there too :-). Here's to August and to everyone starting a new relationship I wish you... Love :-D dont be afraid be free  :-)

7/17/2014 12:41:11 PM

7/15/2014 6:50:31 PM

So... I think I'm a b word because of what turns me off.... I'm sorry big houses don't entice me... I'm sorry talking about gstrings or thongs doesn't do anything but remind me of back in middle school... I'm sorry lack of patience doesn't rush me... I'm sorry that being told to let you finish but when I speak I'm cut off, interrupted, or argued down about what I define as a meeting or more... I'm sorry that I am not impressed by one's years in the lifestyle because I know one can have 20+ yrs and still not understand how to learn let alone control a girl like me because they feel "they've arrived". I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry... Runs and lands on her bed to cry. (I'm not crying for real. It's just what my babygirl side feels like doing). I promise this isn't geared toward anyone but me because although I'm sharing it with people here... It's My journal.

I'm sorry that at the end of the day... I just want an ordinary man that I manage to see as an extraordinary Master. I often felt bad about being picky... But when I look at what I'm picky about it doesn't seem bad... I just want a man of genuine, humble, strength and valor. A man I complement. So... I'm sorry. :-(


7/14/2014 11:31:39 PM
It'll be the first time I'll be there without a certain reason in mind... :-( its cool I guess

7/7/2014 6:59:32 PM
Treat you like you're perfect. Hold your trust won't hurt it. Filled with lust while flirting. Clamps a must, they're hurting. Dick lands in my ass I bounce like girls twerking. You pump me deep and fast my juices begin squirting, your fingers turning. Around and around, I let out more sounds. You slide inside my pussy and begin to pound. Wet and so gushy, it drips slowly down, your leg. My head leans back against the headboard. I love it.
No  @savagesavant :) it didn't technically happen well it has happened before lol but not like that and thanks for the correction

7/4/2014 8:24:07 PM

Before you claim me can you train me I've been trained before but time brings about a change so help me recall what I forgot and then teach me more. I wanna make you feel so hot that your white lava pours. Show me how to hit each spot and then shine up the doors. Just the way you like. A year from now this night. I wanna be in your arms working the fire that's right. No fisting, I like feeling tight. Slow kissing if thats what you like. I'm ready, to call your heart my home and have you reside in mine. 
 not to anyone yet


6/29/2014 12:17:51 PM
Tell me that it's worth it show me you won't hurt it, that if I give you my heart you'll protect it on purpose. Make it clear that you'll do your part while I give my best rendition of service. Be open with me from the start and you'll understand where first is, cause that's where my love will put you. Trust me, ask yourself could you. Fuck me, ask yourself should you. If it's done too soon, we'll be done too soon. Yep I'm a good girl but I promise not a prude. I'll add some clarity on done too soon... I don't mean length of time it lasts I mean you go for my pussy before you have my mind clasped. The Master for me, you could be, just don't jump too fast. But I know what I like quite soon so I wouldn't lean too far back. I know when things click, I need a connection that sticks, and it wouldn't be bad if your manhood was thick, in character and in groove. My attraction is always to, a genuine strict gentleness... I'll quote a drink slogan, my question... Is it in you? If it is let me know if it's not need to tell me usually I already do. By the way I dont care if you're wealthy. I care about if you're true. :-)

6/21/2014 10:32:43 PM
Will you lay me in your arms, protect me from harm, respect that slaves have feelings, be man enough to admit when you're wrong? Will you relearn me how to take a caning without asking you to stop? Does your life express that you're maintaining control or does it not?  Would you rather caramel skin or place it below porcelain? If you were trying to get me back would you focus on me or them? Could I trust you to be the only man in, side? Could you trust me to share your desires and not hide? Is your life already built or could we build together? My trust has been killed... Can you bring it back and make it better? I can offer me... Beyond just what you see, I'm not here for what I want I'm here to find the Master I need.

6/7/2014 9:04:18 PM

Lol totally out of my element but I enjoyed it. The promo pics kinda made me shy. When you dance don't care who is looking. That was a first. I needed that cause I was almost in tears.  biker shuffle lol wish I was riding home to a leash and cuddles but it'll happen.


6/6/2014 7:50:27 PM

I never liked roses but I love the scent
Other things that grow aren’t as effervescent
If you didn’t know I’m in love with the presence
Of a total, Dom in all his glory and essence
So after the roses or before a few seconds
You’ll put me in sexy poses and place the thorns in sections
Around each nipple create a heart design
Near my pussy’s dimple make the lips get wide
Make x’s and o’s on my ass cheeks and thighs
I moan out ohhhh ohhhh ohhhh he chuckles “I love it when she cries..
Show those pretty tears the moment is so deep
Babygirl release those fears feel relaxed with me
Salty liquid so clear shinning from the lights on the streets
Shhhhh someone may hear… On second thought get louder for me!”
Spank! Goes the cane how I flinch makes him seep
It drives me to subspace the combination of sadistic and sweet
He gives my tears a taste, licks them from each cheek
Down my neck, lowers to tits, then I hear him speak
“cum” he yanks the thorns outsiders hear me shriek
“Hun, cum for me more” thorns escape my pussy
I do I do I do orgasms multi
It’s you, it’s you, it’s you the sensual sadist for me
The one thing that’s makes the moment so great so full so amazing
It’s just the start of the night… He takes me out for star gazing
I’m still naked he’s in slacks…
I know you’re waiting but scene fades to black


6/6/2014 4:57:00 PM

I had this fantasy... My Master whoever he will become was caressing my hair and kissing my forehead, massaging my shoulders while his friend began to take me. The Master chuckled as his friend slid inside. I whimpered and shivered and begged because being shared was not my desire... It was his desire. "Who are you, slut?" he questioned. I stopped struggling and pleading... I thought to myself and was totally overcome with the obvious... The body being shared was not my body but... His body. The tears trickling down my face were not my tears but belonged to him. As did my heart. This wasn't an act of pleasure for me. It was another limit, another level, another moment my soul crawled just to see his smile, feel his gentle touch, and inhale his scent as he took me hours later and beat me for cumming, choked me for moaning out, and kissed me with passion for again... Putting his wants before mine and being his pleasing girl. As my spent little body drifted off to sleep, he asked once more "Who are you, little one?" I gazed up at him, my lips almost touching his neck and whispered "Your everything, Sir..."


6/5/2014 8:12:57 PM

I want cuddles! Ahhhhhh :-(... To a message I had today, please don't let me fool you into thinking each person I've come across on here has been a jerk to me. It's not true. Nor is my intent to inspire such thoughts... Some guys have sent me a message on a tough day, in the past week 3 from WI have shown me nothing but care, kindness, and genuine interest but I'm not relocating to WI so there wasn't much we could do but say hi every so often and wish the best. There's one in the UK that regardless if its just a pic with words he makes sure to let me know that to him im his associate that matters. So yes... I'm still waiting and likely will be for a while but again "catch me in proverbs, if patience is a virtue." until then... Goes to see if I have a response to my response.


6/5/2014 3:00:24 PM

LOL I just learned that a few 3 word messages are supposed to be a clue that I should start a conversation... A "dom" asks if we can talk while we are exchanging messages lol and then he showed how domly and mature he was by calling me stupid because saying he wanted to own me or the one he picked didn't get my juices flowing lol. PLUS his location wasn't even on my profile but I'm stupid? Seriously lol My widdle fewwings are sooo hurt. Stomps feet I'm gonna drop two whole net tears :-)


6/4/2014 5:49:47 PM

6/3/2014 11:54:55 PM

The moment you constantly, repeatedly, unmercifully do things to someone for no reason other than that of selfishness you have already left, abandoned, or walked away from them. Action gentleman... Actions speak louder than words and a wise person once said "your actions speak so loud I can not hear the words you say" I'll remix it... Your deeds shine so bright I can't see a word you type... Ya like sports here's a story guys http://www.dailypaul.com/312630/your-actions-speak-so-loudly-i-can-not-hear-what-you-are-saying


6/1/2014 10:37:14 AM

5/31/2014 4:50:35 PM

Some feel a slave serves good and bad... I feel a Master leads afraid or not. A slave serves when times are good or bad not whether the Master is functioning as a good or bad one. A slave is a fool to serve one who fails to Master it. If the slave and other things fall by the wayside and frivolous time wasting takes place the slave is not owned. The slave is abandoned. The man is not mastering but hiding from responsibilities. It's pretty outside and I put more in the garden. I met interesting people today and had good conversation. If the more someone says about themselves the more you realize they aren't for you... Grabs big girl panties, here ya go girl.


5/29/2014 11:49:50 PM

http://servingmaster.com/2012/11/21/the-good-dom/

 10. Is very true... It goes along with my view of leading by example. I agree with every point she made but number 10 should be number 1. I also know there's one for subs and slaves written by a dom. In my future expectations I'd expect a dom to go through this list and I'd go through his rules along with a list like this for subs / slaves. I'd also expect us to discuss our lives thus far. Would serve as preventative measures for rough patches and if those patches came we'd help and remind each other. If the same thing was frequently repeated we'd discuss ending the consideration. I am now a fan of long getting to know you phases before committing. If another slides in on either end, I guess we weren't right for each other.Some doms seem to be in a hurry to get me to their location... If I feel chemistry you'll know and I'll probably mention meeting on my own but lately it seems many are rushing... Hey, I miss belonging to a man maybe more than you know but I'm doing my best to avoid past mistakes and lessen future ones. Whatever starts faster often ends or hits bumps fast verses starting slow and learning, we'd be more likely to hit problems slowly and continue learning. I am almost to terms with losing a special bond in my heart giving myaelf a few more days, and there's no need to throw someone in that section just for the void to be fiill ed randomly, regardless of how much I love moaning daaaa. I rather be sure.


5/28/2014 10:41:59 AM

I think being in love isn't as common as I once thought. Some people have never been and it's all new. It's not on anyone to teach them how but I also don't hold people fully responsible, we are all learning. I am learning a lot each day. I am hopeful for my future and I haven't felt that way in so long. I'm feeling more comfortable in what I bring to the table and more clear about my own struggles. I'm excited about what's next. It's a lovely day. Enjoy it everyone!


5/24/2014 5:53:53 PM

Should be required reading for subs new or not http://67.159.222.79/sadiescolumns/dom/howtospotadom.htm


5/19/2014 7:31:18 PM

Wow, some people just won't change... I'm done hoping for it. To those looking out for me... Thanks, whether your intentions were good or not but I also advise you... Move on from the past. I know it takes time but some are holding onto things from many years ago. Don't let someone's sick games ruin you or take up precious time in your life. Reach your goals, find people who deserve your trust, keep the lessons the hurt has taught you and warn others as you have me but grow. Just grow. I don't need anymore tips or lookouts. I have seen enough to know. Thank you again. If it was to hurt me... You haven't I'm happy to see the truth. If it was to hurt someone else lol I STRONGLY doubt the person gives a dang about me, you, or anyone else. So here's to June!


5/19/2014 8:56:34 AM

Why do I need a Daddy? To be real? I'm not responsible. Not when it comes to myself. Others yes, me no. I need structure, a firm hand, and a man whose ability to unconditionally love is at least half of mine. I am pretty tired of feeling like I'm wasting away and if I did no one would genuinely care. I don't need micromanagement but it does help. I don't need to be kept on a schedule but it does help. I don't need to be spanked and snatched up for infractions... Ok that's a lie, I do... I really do. *falls out laughing* Meanwhile, in the midst of needing a Daddy Dom I'm not going to just accept any takers. Why do I need a Master? To be real? I'm still figuring that out... I know that I hunger to please a man I actually give a dang about. I want to one day feel a man, his life, and I are all better because he has me at his feet. I desperately yearn (I didn't say I was desperate follow me here) for the time I can close my eyes and he takes my hand and I trust him enough to walk with no questions because I know he'll give the answers, guidance, and comfort I need to follow until our time is done. Why do I need a mate? Why do I need both? Cause I give both. And to whom much is given much is required.  


5/19/2014 6:39:09 AM

Yes I'm who my profile says BUT unless you or i have done something to not deserve cordiality we both deserve it. So... Respect my time as i will yours. If you're coming out of the gate do what you say you're going to do or don't even waste the time. Don't expect a girl to be there waiting on you. Unless she's yours and even if she's yours be smart... Value her.


5/17/2014 6:56:06 PM

Come with me slowly are you the one to hold me? touch me soft slap me hard and most of all control me. Do you have more than a moment? I was kind of hoping, everything would flow right and get our juices flowing. Everything you've told me sounds like you could own me. I could be your little slut 10 minutes later your homie, if you're clueless of what I mean let's just keep rolling... I might love the way you spank my butt followed by 3 holing. This is to no one in particular at least not at the moment, but if we're perpendicular you might just start moaning, my bratty side you might get sick of her but the slave won't keep you lonely. I can light your cigarette as your cum drips out on me, and if you're not a smoker yet you'll be smoking once I'm deep throating, the curve of your yummy dick in my mind i hear you groaning, large fingers on my tiny clit moments later it's swollen. I beg you if I may cum yet, you just keep it going, already know I'm dripping wet but I just want you to show me. You say "Cum for me slowly, girl I'll do all the molding. Behave yourself, follow my lead, and I promise your leash I'll be holding" So I cum for you slowly, not just because you've told me. You've dotted those t's and crossed those i's your the man to show me. I should obey, respect at all times, and fall to sleep knowing... I'm yours... You're real... No folding


5/14/2014 7:01:53 PM

Do you ever feel if you could leave the lifestyle you would? I mean not physically but actually if you could live okay if you walked away from it all? I think that... Especially after hard things. I really just wanna walk and forget it all but... I can't, at least not yet. It's too deep within me. The desire to see the smile of a man you love more than yourself. the feeling of his large hand around your neck knowing no one would ever squeeze you like that and invoke the same feelings and chills racing through your body. The synced vibe as he places his hand on your thigh reminding you you're his with no words at all. The tears on his shoulders after you've reached a level just for him, brought on by him, and dedicated to him while your subspace is ruled from his hand. This part I yearn for the before I've had... Knowing his life is easier, better, and more for fulfilling because of your service, your purpose, you're worth it. The hunger in me for passion, ravishment, love based on control, that primal, territorial, alpha male with a hunger for my hunger to feed and fuel him... Keeps me... From walking away from it all. Although the journey gets hard and there's things that happen that maybe shouldn't or maybe should to make us better, stronger, truer... I can't walk away from it... I'm not in it... I live it... Even before I knew what it, I, or the basis of it was, the cards were already dealt, before I even was. He will come and I will be... His


5/13/2014 8:26:38 PM

5/13/2014 8:22:46 PM

5/12/2014 3:20:15 PM

Ok ok ok... to the NY guys (5 in the past hour wanting a reason lol). Yes, I'm open to NJ but for me NY is so different... I can see me having a life in NJ and although the lifestyle community in NY is simply AMAZING and totally bananas (do people even say that anymore?) shrugs... It's just not a place I'd want to live. I mean if you're that amazing... You can give me a shot anyway but I am a tad shall I say harder to pursue for guys that aren't in my preferred locations. Plus, after my last relationship I really couldn't see myself trusting a Dom to be transparent in a place like NY heck a Dom would have to keep me on a super short leash if I moved back to atlanta... Some cities or in this case states are just harder to behave in than others and from the Dom side, some states I think just condition you guys to hide stuff lol. Nope, I don't have trust issues, I just feel men should earn it now. If it sucks I'm sorry should have gotten me 2 years ago when I trusted people until they gave me a reason not to.

Another question has been age... NO I no longer have an age limit... Older men will always be a preference sexually and mentally but as for maturity... I no longer align one's age with the likelihood of them being mature. Some men have lived a long time and are mentally still the same as they were when they were in college or actually worse because instead of hurting school girls who are starting out life, they're disrupting grown women who offer to share or even stop their lives for them. So as long as you're mature your age is not important. 


5/12/2014 12:17:54 PM

To the messages about sheet mulching, tilling, and so forth... Thank You gents... I needed you guys a good 2 months ago lol but I'm aware of these things.(gardening tips on CM who woulda thunk it? giggles) It's been tilled but at the time I was instructed to leave basically dead grass where it was when I should have removed it... So what's happening is new grass is growing up... So I figured to make an experiment of it one area is being covered with cardboard / newspaper and the other is me removing the sod and mixing in gypsum and a few other things. It wasn't that no one was being helpful but I was taking advice from those with already established gardens and without much effort were able to just throw their veggies in LOL aint life grand for some folk? I really wish I had done raised beds like I started to but again it was my choice and guess what the same thing I'm doing with the cardboard is what I would have done with raised beds so as usual I'm resilient and making lemons with lemonade. Now that I have more of a plan I'm a lot more excited about it. I am late but my seedlings are doing well and my tomatoes that are in the garden are also well. Lesson: in life and in the lifestyle it's great to be obedient but keep in mind you must also be strong enough to deal with the consequences of obeying orders that may not be the best for you or your life....


5/11/2014 5:09:24 PM

As my lips touch yours, I just want you more... as your eyes trace my thighs I moan galore... you ask why, I'm not sure... all I know is I... am... yours... To the future wherever you are


5/11/2014 3:38:09 PM

Sorry but if you message me and I click for your profile and nothing shows, it lets me know you're approaching me with a hidden profile. People only hide profiles when either they aren't looking (why message about being my daddy if you aren't looking) or they're trying to make someone else think they aren't looking (so being a weak dom). I know the hurt of a guy doing things behind your back so with that said, I refuse to be an idiot (no offense to subs clueless enough to respond) but I don't see a point in it. So you may be a nice guy (I doubt it) but with a hidden profile, I'll NEVER know it. Wanna talk, cool this is a hide free zone.  ALSO

I really hate the whole "hello slave... what is your name slave... how old are you slave" it's just so fricking annoying. Do I walk to people on the street and say "Hi tall man... how is your day tall man? what are your hobbies tall man?" I mean even if I know a guys name am I going to say "Hello billy... where do you live billy? What is your favorite color billy?" I hope its not some hypnosis technique if it is lol it fails miserably. Even if I'm not interested I always try to respond but that's one thing that doesn't even deserve a response.


5/11/2014 11:36:51 AM

So lately I've been getting grass out of the garden lol. Only take gardening advice from those who are professionals, have researched it, or have been doing it a while otherwise you land in mid May double digging when you could have had it done in early april. But it's cool, I only blame myself. Always trust your intuition. I am happy that it's giving my legs some nice definition and it's a good way to blow off stem. Someone break your heart? Break down soil lol. This week my goal is to get most things in the ground because according to the almanac and moon phases 11th-14th are excellent days to plant :) I'm resilient so a little grass or struggle isn't going to hold me back or keep me down.


5/8/2014 11:32:09 AM

I am just speechless, so I'll type... I've seen men while having subs push for communication with other subs, almost with a sense of desperation. I've recently had 2 within the past few days admit desperation back a year ago when they pursued me while I was in an on off situation. I truly hunger to be owned but I refuse to be desperate or settle out of ease or comfort. The ones i seem to like either want me before even meeting, have little time, or obligations. Little time is cool after I've gotten to know ya but if there's no time for that then shrugs. As for obligations if I'm told up front (i thank those who have) then i can make an informed decision... Right now my informed decision is i just can't rock with it. The life of You or kids if You have them is already rough but then to add more i just don't see me fitting in that. I'm still here.... Just not going to intentionally be as prompt about returning messages or as ready to fly out and visit. I'm seeking and open just minus the active. When the fitting Master / Daddy arrives, I'll be ready. I just refuse to be desperate.There's doms and subs that come close to forcing connections with people just because of their race, or height, or location and... To me, it's just bogus or sad or unnecessary. Dont get me wrong I'm all for getting what you want / need but there should be a line lol I'm leaning back a bit. Maybe dabble more into the munches and what not outside of my location and just focus on self improvement and analyzation, and breathe a sigh of relief from all the lies I've been told. Now if You are real, and may have the time to invest in getting to know me, and your life doesn't have you playing one part when with me and another when you're not, if the weight of the world isn't on your shoulders but you could offer stability if i climbed on, dont hesitate to still approach me. But again, i refuse to be desperate. Patience is a virtue? Then, you can find me in proverbs *wink*


5/2/2014 8:45:08 AM

I like it slim or thick, 10 or 6, as long as it's attached to a genuine dominant. You like creative? Cool, just give me a bit, of your time, we'll combine, I'm top of the line. If you're real with me it won't take long to find, that I'm good. I'm not without flaw, I'm not hotter than all, the long legged curvy girls with the hair all blonde. That's just not me, but I guarantee, after a little time, if you're straight up you'll see. That I'm not "just" a sub or a piece of property, and let me preface this before I complete, I'm not cocky at all full of humility, but the truth is the truth, and the truth is... I'm a rarity. Some here are fools gold, I'm the type strong doms would hold, build up and sink down with that iron leash hold, I've always craved blind trust still want it but a few years ago I was told, "you'll please a good one and he'll treat you exact, but first lil one you'll waste time with some bad. And when you walk away one day they'll look back, see even though they're older when they've got a you in their life instead of effort to keep that, they'll just bask." So while they bask I strengthen my service, have a few laughs like really dudes do dumb stuff on purpose? A few times I get mad then go back to honing my purpose. Which is preparing to please, put any girl in a kitchen or in rice on her knees. That's not gonna make her a slave if she is it's known when she breathes. And if she's flattered by a stranger saying she has those tendencies... She's got a lot to learn. I need a Master that's firm, but at the end of the day can hold me knowing what I've earned. Believing what I'm worth. Knowing he might fuck around but he'd be honest and never let himself or others hurt. Our vibe, because he'd value me kneeling by his side. I know that deep down every tear I've cried was drawn so when that knight arrives and saves the day, paves my way, nails on a collar so I won't stray. I'll smile, appreciate it, and he'll become a King from that day. Screw what the world thinks that's how I'd see him. His style would be distinct and no lame secrets. We'll stride off into the wind neither past would be repeated. Besides the mind blowing sex and orgasms when we're scening. He'd know I was the best to serve in his kingdom. I'd see him as nothing less than the Master, I've always needed.


5/1/2014 1:27:30 PM

Something many don't do anymore... I now am willing to offer references to subs / slaves... So if you prove yourself real and you approach me about someone you think or know I have dealt with or served I will answer. I won't disclose their personal info because I wouldn't want that done to me but I'm not going to sit quietly if you're seeking info to help you and or protect you. Message me if you like. And if a former puts someone up to ask it'll be obvious and ignored. Also advise you ti run your own background and records check on these guys. Some things there is screen shot proof etc. As for anything I've experienced without proof its only heresay so take what you like. Anything I say will likely be proven true.


5/1/2014 11:15:56 AM

NOTE: To truckers who may be about to approach me... I know from experience what comes along with your title. Doesn't mean I won't deal with you but PLEASE don't try telling me "I'm not like the others" you aren't the same but you do the same things and that's cool with me but be upfront about it. Again, that doesn't mean I wouldn't love to take a ride in a big truck again. I love the open road and sleeper sex is the best. I will totally ease the frustration and keep ya happy just don't waste time trying the "want a life with you" while setting up stuff and hiding me. And if you need a main girl go get that I have no desire to be the main girl of anyone in the trucking industry unless you're the type to (out of 4 truckers only one has been this real to say) "okay baby, I've got your back I love you I'll look out for you, but I'm going to pursue, talk to, or deal with other girls / subs / slaves.) And his name started with an L nothing else. So yea dealing with ya'll I know what I'm getting into but it takes a STRONG Dom to be real about what he does without being scared of what lil ole me is gonna do or say. If that's you, reach out to me. My schedule is flexible and I'd love to hit Fla or Cali or Iowa again, so let's ride Daddy. Truckers don't get a bad wrap each and everyone of ya work pretty hard to earn it and guess what? I still accept, love, and support what you guys do cause it does get lonely, ya'll do work hard, and yep "everything you have most likely got to ya on a truck" Why couldn't we just be happy with buggies, carriages, and living off the land instead of creating a career that inspires people to ruin families, pose health risks, lie without admitting, and cause pain and anguish lol oh well such is life.


4/22/2014 6:33:04 PM

Sometimes all a girl needs is to know that she isn't alone. That she matters. That she's worth the energy to invest. But sometimes that's too much to ask for. And when it is then... It just is.

If I were the right Dom or Daddy for myself... I'd always tell my girl what I was thinking good or bad if I thought it would help us. I wouldn't keep her hopes up when I know certain things just aren't possible. I wouldn't bring her into situations that had no positive end or growth in sight for her. That's all loving and sweet right? Yeah... I also wouldn't let her handle things if she felt she couldn't. I wouldn't put the future or progression of our relationship on her little shoulders. I wouldn't get lazy with her just because I can't physically reach out and punish her at the moment. I would listen to her and show her the weight of her words but I'd also give her words to feel and carry with her. I wouldn't expect her to forget all the wrong I've done but I'd train her to respect all the right I stand for and if I didn't stand for right I'd change. I'd improve, because I'd know that would inspire her, fuel her, eternally bind her to me. Forever! If I wanted my slut home, that's where she'd be. If I wanted to have a life with her I'd look actually make the little tiny step to just look at a place for us to start that life and show it to her. I wouldn't throw the past at her to prove my points, especially if I know it could fly right back at me. I'd have her always growing, always yearning, always focused, always mine... Not because I'd be perfect, or never yell, or always the best but because I'd be open, genuine, mature, nurturing, strict, and most of all REAL.

I'd "Never separate the life you live from the words you speak..." if I "speak" that I wanted her and only her in my everyday life regardless of if I were around family, friends, etc then "the life I live" would correlate with the words I'd whisper to her. And more importantly... In that way... My slut would follow my lead and represent my position in her life with the utmost RESPECT.

Ya know the sucky thing about it? I'm not a Daddy... I'm not a Dom... Have no desire to be... But I wish I could because... The tears would stop, the lies would end, the confusion would cease, and I'd be loved, controlled, valued, and OWNED.

When little slave girls are young... It's the stuff described above that we lay in bed dreaming of. Then we hit 28 and realize... It may have only been a dream. But with a dangling peace of faith... We wait...


4/16/2014 7:15:55 PM

lol @ a 40yr old who still refers to ladies as chicks giving me relationship advice... hehehehe


2/17/2014 11:53:41 AM

2/12/2014 9:44:45 AM

2/11/2014 10:24:55 PM

Lol men kill me with the "not looking to change my situation" actually lol you are the minute you go seeking something else. Now just cause she isn't made privy to it doesn't mean the situation doesn't change lol. And even without a pic still know lol. Dang I'm good smh dodged a big bullet


2/11/2014 11:27:42 AM

2/11/2014 11:11:20 AM

12/29/2013 6:34:37 PM

11/15/2013 9:29:34 PM

Dom, Master, Daddy, sissy, male sub, butler... Those are all titles. In the end they're still men... They're going to make mistakes, do dumb stuff on purpose cause they think its ok and call it mistakes, and make you smile once in a while... My point... I look at them all as men until they show me different and even after that its a daily life leading me and reminding me what was shown is still there. Its easier to go from a man to a completely trusted and respected Dom in my eyes than to get to the highest, collapse, and go back up.... It has never occurred.


10/31/2013 5:43:02 AM

I'm not seeking poly anytime soon... If I were, her and I would have to be able to share a friendship and she alone or both would have to approach me. I'd have to know she liked me and wanted it. You'd have to be transparent if i can go to her telling her things and she can do the same in reference to you then its drama and i will not trust you, then I'll leave. I'm usually very quick to leave situations that i see no major progression or positivity in. also the Dom would need not to compare us to each other.

If you're seking a second because your current doesn't deepthroat you right or take your pain well enough or can't cook or any other skill that YOUR development of her should teach or instill. I would NEVER be interested because if a Master loves his slaves he will teach, equip, and show them. (i got bible for that lol ) "do you love me? Feed my sheep" in other words do what needs to be done to show your love and dedication. I get we all aren't painsluts but you also should know ones pain threshold before taking her on and if not at least be loving enough to attempt pushing her in that way if she's willing, if not again that should have been discussed. I get different slaves may serve different roles but again shed have to see her own strengths and weaknesses (if you're honest she does know) approach me for you.

I know... You think I'm a bitch because I'm selective, judgmental, and expressive right? GREAT! That means i already mimic my future Daddy Dom lol Because I plan to one day be selected, a Dom will make judgments on big decisions EVERYDAY,  and he'll be expressive cause if I'm not taught better I won't know better and if I dont know better how the heck can I do better and if I can't do better how will I ever be better and if part of the plan isn't making me better for you.... What the heck do you want with me anyway?


10/23/2013 7:55:57 PM

LOL You can't be apart of something hidden and then get bothered when you notice more things in hiding. Either embrace light alone or be accompanied in darkness. Heck, if you're in darkness you're alone in that too at some point. So quit lollygagging.


10/4/2013 12:42:03 PM

What is the deal today with doms and dogs? If you're easing a stranger into k9 have some friggin tact will ya? 


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PrincessVicki
 
 Age: 20
 Knoxville, Tennessee