Collarspace.com

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Fritzman

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Friends:
smileforme50

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The profile photo is of a marble bust. Real photo to any who ask. Several have said I really do resemble the bust. Our time together will be private. No parties, no munches. I accept partners of most ages, but my favorite is a woman in her forties. She's decided that her years as an adult have become dull. The conventional life has been a secure one, but now she yearns to break out of the boredom and compromise that has been a part of that. She wants to return to a time when sincerity, spontaneity and learning were her goals. She seeks adventure and wants to open herself to new, penetrating activities.
This is a serious thing in many ways, an emotional journey for us both, a way to work through unsettled issues past and present, but if you're not having fun, why do it?
I will guide you in an environment that makes you feel safe but thrilled at the same time.
The orgasms you have with me will be a major part of our encounters, but the journey to those destinations will be as memorable.
Beauty comes in all heights and weights, but I personally can't get sexually aroused by women who are taller or heavier than I am.
I'm a recent amputee.


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1/23/2016 9:45:27 AM
I don't often read Dan Savage's Savage Love column. I have nothing against it; I just don't come across it. His most recent one, however, has great advice aimed at Tinder users that would apply even more aptly to subs meeting doms for the first time:
A few weeks ago, you answered a letter from Seeks Discreet Call Service, a woman in an open marriage who was having Tinder hookups in hotel rooms while traveling for work. She was concerned about her safety and wanted to have someone check in on her, but she couldn't tell her partner about her hookups (DADT arrangement) or her friends (she's not out about her open marriage). She specifically asked if there was an app that might help, and you told her there wasn't an app for that. You were wrong, Dan! There are actually several apps. PCWorld published a roundup of a few of them a couple of years ago ("5 Personal Safety Apps That Watch Your Back," by Amber Bouman), and there's an app called Kitestring that has gotten some glowing reviews. The gist is that you use the app to set a timer, and when it goes off, you have to alert the app that you are okay. Otherwise, the app automatically contacts emergency services or a predetermined contact and lets them know you are in trouble at your location. So technology does have a solution for SDCS's problem!
Other apps mentioned were StaySafe, Watch Over Me and bSafe.

11/5/2015 12:03:36 PM
I was just reading the current issue of Writers' Digest and one of its articles about how it's never too late to begin writing had a passage that could refer to being a submissive. It talked about how relinquishing control allows you to live in the hear and now, not thinking about the past, not anticipating the future. Neither matters because you're in the grip of a force greater than yourself, i.e., the desire—the need—to write. Yes, it is easier to trust your own desires and needs than it is to trust a dominant, but once you have, the freedom to experience your submission can be as liberating.

9/22/2013 8:52:09 PM

Is it known by all that many women get profiles on this site solely so they can delete messages unread? Of course, we all know that if you put your cursor over a message you can read all of it, so they are reading it before deleting it, but they like to think they're wounding all the men who take the trouble of writing to them. And yet it is they who end up at least as alone as the men who respond to them.

Sad, isn't it?


4/4/2013 6:26:11 PM

I never use the word "vanilla" to refer to anyone who doesn't engage in the activities I and those of you reading this do and you shouldn't either.

It's judgmental. It implies that the people who fit the description are dull, ordinary, and there's an implicit sneer in saying it, as if you're better than those who don't live like you do, more adventurous. But whatever you do, I guarantee it you can find someone who goes beyond it. Does that make you "vanilla"? How would you feel being called that?

A better word, to me, is conventional. As I use it, it carries no bias. A person who's conventionally attractive and one who's unconventionally so are equally good looking.

"Vanilla" should mean this, but it doesn't. If I had to limit myself to one flavor of ice cream for the rest of my life, vanilla would be my probable choice.  


1/18/2013 5:12:42 AM

Two letters I read in Dear Abby as an early teen stay with me today. One was from a girl who had been bound and gagged, along with her mother, by a burglar. A boy named Peter "heard our moans, climbed in a window, and rescued us." The problem was that the boy now thought he was better friends with the girl than she wanted him to be. The second letter was from a mother who's teenage daughter had a boyfriend who liked to bind her. He'd tie her hands behind her back and the two would sit in the TV room and watch TV. The mother said the boy and her daughter persuaded her to try it. "He bound me to the bannister post, and I must say the feeling was intriguing."

Newspaper bondage erotica from four decades ago.


12/26/2012 8:26:29 AM

Deleted unread? Please. So many on here do that to perfectly nice inquiries just to be mean. It's the only time they can get a sense of power. Pathetic. And the main thing is this: Everyone knows they're actually reading it. The whole message shows up when you put the cursor over it. Do these meanies really think people don't know that?


11/26/2012 6:08:27 PM

I'm guessing this site's going under, judging from all the glitches it's been having lately. It seems they can't afford to maintain it properly. Oh well. You get what you pay for, right? It was fun while it lasted.


10/14/2012 4:29:46 PM

Sad, isn't it? You start entering your name in the little box to log in and get a pop up ad. All you do, of course, is click on the little X to close it and continue on your way. I guess this site's getting desperate for money. And so greed makes another one bite the dust ...


9/10/2012 7:28:16 AM

Yesterday I was looking at the clouds, which were stunning as a storm front blew off the oppressive, damp air which had dominated for weeks and rich blue skies and fleecy clouds moved in. I remembered the times I've traveled by plane and gone through then above clouds and I realized that they're actually more interesting and beautiful to look at from the ground than they are in the air. Most beautiful things get more so close up. Not clouds.


9/1/2012 7:10:49 PM

I'm rich now and I live in a house. Well, no, not rich. Just not poor. I now have the retirement savings that most people my age already have but I've lacked till now.

It's a nice change from being poor and living in an apartment, but really, not much else has changed about me. Or has it? I have the same job (now with a longer commute) and don't talk about money with others (it was inherited). I'm not doing anything crazy with the money because, mostly, I don't want to and, partly, because it would dishonor my parents. About the only difference is that now when I'm shopping and I see fruit I like and the price is high, I buy it anyway. For example, I get the big, dark grapes instead of the pale green ones, so long as they're seedless. Grapes with seeds often taste better (why is that?) but I can't be bothered with seeds.


7/21/2012 7:05:22 PM

I'll never understand why a woman would post a profile here just to try to threaten those who respond. There is one now who comes up with a different profile every few weeks or so, at times more than one at a time, and does this. We've all seen examples of mental illness, especially in the sad event of July 20, but no matter how often such things occur, it will never be possible to grasp the thinking behind it. What good does it do? 


7/2/2012 9:43:39 AM

What kind of person with a minimal profile won't share a head shot with you but instead demands meeting without an exchange of even a few emails to see if you're at all compatible before taking time out of your busy day to travel several miles to get together?

In my experience, they've been angry nut jobs with faces that could stop a clock.


5/11/2012 12:59:28 PM

Well, blew it again. Got a little manic when chatting with someone last night and got a polite brush off. My fault. I must remember to go easy on the coffee when chatting next time and try not to say more than she is. A pity. I liked this woman. Live and learn, I guess.


5/7/2012 10:33:50 AM

You know how when you log off of here and see a little picture that intrigues you on the refreshed page? So you click on it and it gets big and you want to find out more about this person. So you click to view the profile and it asks for verification information. Now, if you've been doing this for awhile you've gotten lazy about it. The computers at collarme must have the most skewed statistics on earth. They must think that half the non-members looking at it are 112 years old and are named sdfddf dsfs.


3/24/2012 8:26:43 AM

Is anyone beside me having trouble sending messages to people? Quick message works, but I can't message the normal way, on their profile page. This is happening with everyone and surely I haven't done anything that deserves being blocked!


9/6/2011 12:12:08 PM

It's nice of CM to have the Newest Local Users tab, but do they really think someone 95 miles away is local? Hmmm. Why I don't just hop in the car and drive for two hours for a cup of tea? Maybe it makes more sense in other parts of the country from mine, where distances are greater and roads are less congested.


3/20/2011 4:25:54 PM

This kind of thing will never cease to baffle me. A new person posted here and met enough of what I seek that I wrote her the brief message below:

Welcome to the site. I've made a few friends here and had a nice time communicating with them. The only person I've met face-to-face with so far, however, is someone I met on (another site that cm deletes mention of) . This is a little odd as that site isn't at geared toward dating in anyway. It's more of a social networking page. I know how much sifting women have to do on this site to find an appropriate potential partner, so I'll let you get to it. I'd like to hear more about you sometime. If you choose not to contact me, I wish you well in your quest.
B.

And what do I find when I check my email here? "Deleted unread." Why? Why? Why?


12/12/2010 6:01:25 PM
The photo.
A friend on this site sent me a photo of herself some time ago. We'd written about ball gags. She hates them but endures them for her partner sometimes. (This discussion between us was a minor part of what we talk about.) Later, she sent me photos her partner had taken of her wearing a ball gag. Not a professional photo, not the best of her, though it's hard to take a bad picture of her -- she's attractive -- yet I was touched and moved and, yes, aroused, by the photo.
The acres of porn photos on the Net, yet a real photo of someone you know sent to you personally can still mean much more than any of them. I'd forgotten that. It was good of her to remind me.

11/29/2010 7:50:15 PM
Confessions
*I write to people who I'll never meet.
*No matter what anyone writes to me here, I'll never respond with an insult or in anger.
*When I look at the journals, I make sure to hit the Previous button many times to be fair to those who may have posted something in off hours.
*When I'm on this site and "New Messages" appears, I read them immediately so I can politely give someone a prompt response. This means that if I'm reading the journals I have to click the Previous button many times to go back to where I was.
*I wish I could be more ruthless, as many women on this site seem to like that, but I'm just not. My desire is to "own" a woman I think of highly for a little while a few times a month.

11/24/2010 4:38:25 PM

People who should be sentenced to death, Thanksgiving Day edition.

Anyone who says "Gobble gobble!" around that time.

Anyone who says, "Have a good Turkey Day!"

Anyone dumb enough to think that they're going to get one of the four 42-inch LED screen TVs at the doorbuster sale.

Anyone who thinks that going to a store at 3 in the morning to be ready for a Black Friday sale has anything to do with anything but simple, vulgar greed.

Anyone who thinks giving presents to another on a set date once a year because they "have to" makes sense in any way.

 


11/19/2010 5:44:31 PM

I thought of this earlier today, when it was slow at work:

It's one hundred years ago and a mime has a stroke. He has been rendered so unresponsive by it that he's perceived as dead by an incompetant doctor. He is buried the next day and after his coffin is covered with dirt he awakes. In total darkness, he reaches out with his hands, feeling for an exit, a way out. The Question: In his final minutes, as he dies for real, continuing to seek an escape, does he see the humor in this?


11/6/2010 5:42:26 PM

A man in my city had a notable bondage session not too long ago. Two women (the fantasy of many of us), stripped and bound. He had sex with one while the other watched.
This was, however, an attack. A break in. The women, roommates, had never met the man, a serial rapist. He was caught, tried and convicted and will spend life behind bars with no chance of parole, having been convicted of a similar crime previously in another city. A just sentence.
Some on this site wonder why there are those of us who don't post real photos of ourselves. In my case it's because of this overlap of my love of BDSM activities and criminal acts. It's not like coming out of the closet for gays and lesbians (why on earth was homosexuality ever illegal anyway?) or gorging on premium ice cream. To me, it's like saying you shoplift and then return the merchandise. A grey area.
There's also the assumption by some that dominants have a weakness of some kind, that they can only feel confident around women who have been subjugated in some way. In my case, the truth: They may have a point. I do get a testosterone surge of sorts when I have a woman in bondage and the same is true when I'm intimate with women who are much smaller than I am. It spurs a kind of hyper masculinity. On the reverse side of this, I find that when expressing a difference of opinion to others I do so in a more differential way to men who are six inches taller and much stronger than I am. I know business women under 5'4" who wouldn't dream of interacting with their male peers in flat soled shoes.
Finally, another reaction to be feared from outsiders is simple derisive mirth. You know, the "Ohhh! Kinkay!" mock self butt slap a la Benny Hill reaction. I can do without that.


11/3/2010 3:12:00 PM

Last night I forgot how to swallow. There I was, watching a movie on TV and I realized I wanted to swallow so I tried to swallow and couldn't. Then I started thinking about it and trying harder, which made something in my throat tense up and I was even more unable to swallow. I went to the kitchen and poured a small glass of apple cider, which is delicious this time of year by the way, and drank some. I swallowed it. Then I tried to consciously swallow and again, I just couldn't. This made me think about it even more. What if I'd forgotten how to swallow forever? Would I only be able to do it when I eat and drink? Would I be able to live that way? Would I spend the rest of my life drooling? Is that a disability? Would people hire me? Couid I get unemployment compensation of somekind if they wouldn't?

Then the movie got more interesting and I forgot all about the topic and resumed swallowing normally.


10/18/2010 8:26:49 PM

I'll never understand the thinking of what some do to their websites. Like this one. They've souped up the word processing elements on what should be something simple, but not put in essentials like spell check. In what case would I ever want to insert a horizontal ruler, as kinky as that sounds? At the same time they've disable Firefox's connection and ability to underline mispelled words in red. Don't we all know how to highlight things and cut them using easy and fast keystrokes?

Hey, collarme! Put spellcheck in and while you're at it, make it so a hand comes out of the screen and slaps people who write "LOL," OK?

Thanks.


9/14/2010 3:42:49 PM
This is probably pathetic as hell, but I love clicking Who's Viewing Me? and seeing who has. I'm not talking about people who've looked at my profile recently—that only happens about once every two weeks (ladies, it's different for men, believe me)—but to review the total, which is around twenty after over a year. Still, the idea that those twenty-odd women spent even a few seconds learning about who I am and what I'm like gives me a little boost.
I told you this was pathetic.

9/11/2010 4:51:06 AM
I wake up and take a leak. I flush the toilet but the handle is loose in my hand and nothing happens. I take the lid off and find that the piece of plastic that connects the handle lever to the flap broke at the flap and that I'll need to get a new flap but I work during the hours the hardware store's open and won't be able to get there until Monday.
This is awful, I think, I'll have to flush manually, taking the lid off every time. A bother. Why is life so unfair?
The I remembered today's date and squelched those thoughts.

9/3/2010 6:50:33 PM
The best bondage position. For me, it's the hogtie. Why? I'm not sure. I dislike the name. It's inelegant and inaccurate; no one ties an animal that way, and women when in it are made beautiful; anything but hogs. I love how mere ounces of rope transforms women, makes them symmetrical, calm. The degree to which it immobilizes them.

Putting a woman into a hogtie is an exercise in dominance and cooperation. She sits or stands while I bind her wrists and ankles. I take her arm and have her hop into place, steadying her as she moves, ready to stop a fall. I help her to her knees and stand behind her as I hold her arms or shoulders and gently lower her to the floor. She merges with the floor, a definition of waiting. She is eight, nine inches tall as I stand over her, observing. Arms pulled back, her shoulders form angles, incongruously hard and sharp for one so soft. I have her look up at me, a reminder of our positions. Her neck extends, strains; the head raises, eyes meet mine. We are yin and yang. I can walk toward her, away from her, around her. I can turn her to one side or another. She can do little but feel my touch and anticipate my actions. I control this time. I create her story, a skilled author, powerful words on a page, smooth, unquestioned. A book she can't put down.

A woman hogtied on my rug is island, her head the major city. Even when when blindfolded and gagged, it's where the decisions are made, where information comes and communication goes. The back, muscles writhing as she tests her bonds, is farmland, waves of a ripe crop rippling in the wind. The legs, bent, ankles attached to wrists, are mountains, smooth, peaking at the fragile toes pointing skyward. Between the legs is a cove, fertile, moist, mysterious. Sea level. My hand enters, probing, teasing, exploring. The body responds, there are moans. 

8/30/2010 5:11:48 PM
The late summer heatwave. It's weird because you don't respect it and behave accordingly. So you do things as you would normally this time of year, run, cycle, shop. It gives you a lasting headache. A hot breeze blows something that makes a forgotten sound as it scrapes down the street; a dried leaf, an early castoff from a tree withdrawing for winter. The heat makes you think the sky will be dark at nine as in mid-June, but dusk falls at 7:30. Last week there were some days you could call chilly. You wore a heavier shirt and had a steaming plate of pasta for dinner. You kept your socks on until you got into bed. As it should be. Not now. You'll feel stupid if you complain about the heat, a crank. You keep your comments to a minimum, reflecting only on the lateness of the spell.

8/26/2010 6:04:09 AM
To all the women responding to my profile:
1. Yes, it's all true, what's on there. Honestly, I'm surprised so many of you find it hard to believe; to me it's unexceptional, but I don't read many other men's so I wouldn't know.
2. I'm sorry I haven't gotten back to all of you yet, but I've had many, many of you expressing interest, which I'm flattered to get. Please be patient. That you haven't heard from me yet doesn't mean I'm not interested in getting in touch. I'm working my way down the list from top to bottom.

8/7/2010 5:29:39 PM
Women, read this:
Hey you! Yes, you. You are an ugly, uninteresting, stupid piece of shit. You don't deserve to find anyone on this or any other website. You're just no fucking good at anything, you ugly cunt. I hate you. Everybody does. We all wish you were dead.
Done.
Now, don't you feel a little wounded by that? And yet it wasn't directed at you, was written by someone you've never met and written for no one at all in particular. But when we read something, no matter what it is, no matter how absurd, the words affect us at least a little, sometimes a lot. I have no idea why this is. Perhaps it's because the written word was nearly always traceable to its writer, making him or her choose what was said with greater care. Maybe it's because we still hear that little voice in our heads when we read and that little voice is a version of us and therefore one has impact.
The reason I'm raising this is because in so many women's journals I read the writers complain about nasty emails they get, nearly always from men. They mock the guys who write these emails, rightly calling them the sad, angry, frustrated men they are, but behind this tone I can sense the pain of hurt feelings. I'm here to tell you now that you should question the validity of their messages before letting them hurt you. I often read the profiles and other journal entries by the women who get shat on and I've yet to find one who deserved to be written to that way.
Why do men do this? Who knows? Some of us think we get a kind of satisfaction from it. We've often tried to woo you women with our charm and humor and been ignored in favor of men with more. That hurts us, of course, but we're at a loss when it comes to being better at getting women to like us. (That applies to me. I'm in a large city. If I were better at reading women and selling them on the idea of me I'd be able to find plenty of subs, slaves, what have you, just walking into any club or bar and sizing up the women there. I'm not, so here I am sitting alone in my apartment, online.) So we lash out. The joy we get from this is fleeting and empty and eventually turns to guilt, and we wallow in that.
When I got my driver's license as a teen I made it a policy not to yell at or otherwise abuse pedestrians or bikers. I'd seen several of my peers get that ersatz courage when they were safely armored in a two-ton vehicle and it struck me as too pathetic to want to take part in that. When the internet came along, I saw the same thing and I made it my policy not to write anything to someone I wouldn't say to their faces. Have I slipped up on that? Sure, but only a few times, and only mildly.
This is getting long. My apologies. My point is, when you get these emails, I think the best thing you can do is ignore them completely. Don't tell guys you're blocking them, just do it. Don't try to respond in kind, it only gives them reason to do it more to you and to others. Here's a great quote from Meister Eckhart, phrased with the usual male bias, but just ignore that: In silence a man can most readily preserve his integrity. 

8/1/2010 6:49:15 PM
Sometimes I'll click on the profile of someone here who I think may be interesting to read more about. Then the blue bar on the right of my aging computer's screen shrinks as more and more "friends" are added. The smaller it gets, the more disappointed I become. I click and pull down to get to the meat of the profile but it gets jerked up as more and more -- hundreds, in a few cases -- of blank icons convert to tiny photos.
Please. You call these friends? To me a friend is someone who will clean out a spare room for you if there's a fire in your apartment building, or who will lend you $700, no questions asked, who calls you up and suggests meeting for a drink or a meal.
I can see the reasons for the popularity of facebook, though I don't have an account there. We shop online, bank, apply for jobs, get money and communicate with people we know and care about. Much of that is real. But if you really think the 250 people you've "friended" there or been friended by are going to give you their unconditional support in a time of need, you're deluding yourself.
More and more people are beginning to call facebook this era's AOL. That sounds right. 

7/29/2010 8:37:39 PM
You can always spot the clueless men here by their profile photos.
You have the type who thinks that although they're straight, women will be turned on by homo erotic pics, so they do biceps poses or take their shirts off and flex their chest and abdominal muscles.
Then there are those who, while older, still take off their shirts and pose for their web cams. This bares an unfortunate amount of skin in unattractive places, lit by the glow of the computer monitor. They look poorly groomed and lonely, just hopeful enough to make you want to cry. The background is usually dark and even if they lived in palaces it looks like they're in seedy, cluttered apartments, bookshelves lined with leather bound Great Masterpiece series they never got around to reading. They cope with baldness and weak chins by growing goatees and shaving their heads, and you can tell by their necks that they are often really, really fat. If they are wearing shirts, they're T-shirts. T-shirts on men who say they're 55 years old but are really 61.
Other guys wear suits. Look at me! I have a job! I can tie a tie and order from a menu! These might be the best of the clueless.
Penis men are, well, penis men. What can you say? Is this a playground? Am I seven years old? Do you have a criminal record? Got any candy?
And me. A coward who uses a photo of a marble bust that kind of looks like me but obviously isn't. In my defense, in addition to being a coward I've simply read too many accounts of lost jobs, ridicule and public scorn when it comes to those with unconventional desires outing themselves.
I wonder whether or not everyone who's posted real photos have thought it through. What will you say to your 12-year-old when the other kids print out photos of you tied to a bed or wearing nipple clamps?

7/22/2010 6:13:41 PM
Before you read this, let me make this clear: I am not a fat bigot. I know how easy it is to put weight on and how hard it is to take it off. And I know, though not firsthand of course, how much harder it can be for women to lose weight. Hormones and emotional issues play a much stronger role for women and food than they do for men, and I appreciate that.
That out, here's a true case history of a distant (physically, other country) girlfriend of mine. Make of it what you will.
S. was chronically overweight. Not ridiculously so, but always forty to fifty pounds heavier than her ideal weight. Pretty despite this, she had many lovers and several boyfriends in her 20s and 30s. I was, in her late 30s, her 32nd, and a boyfriend. S. exercised, read books, traveled extensively and had a wonderful sense of humor. She made friends easily and had a musical, lilting voice and laugh. She was Welsh.
Her longest term boyfriend was model handsome. Tall, dark, edgy. I met him and even I, a bad judge of such things, could see it. She told me she "got him" because when they met, in university, she simply assumed a woman like her, attractive but fat, would have no chance with him so she acted around him as she would any female friend or male relative. This made her appealing to him and he pursued her.
They eventually became a couple. He turned out to be abusive, off and on, and their relationship was also off and on. I asked her, years after it was decisively over, why she stayed with a man who hit her in anger even once. She said, "Because he was just so damn good looking."
Men have done stupider things for eye candy.
S. and I became lovers, briefly, years ago, when she traveled to my hometown in the U.S. We corresponded by mail for two years afterward and talked on the phone. The energy just wasn't there for me, but it was for her, which led to stormy communications and hurt feelings on her end which were, honestly, my fault.
After a particularly bad phone conversation, I didn't hear from her for over two months. She was a slow adapter of email and this was years before Facebook, which I know makes it seem like it must have in the Madmen era, but was not so long ago. I assumed she had had enough of me and called it quits.
Finally, I heard from her. She'd been extremely ill. Something not completely diagnosed, but brain related and it had her drifting in and out of consciousness for those two months.
A side effect of her illness was that she lost much weight. I was never clear on how much (she used the word "stone," a U.K. measurement) but a lot. She became, for the first time since before puberty, slim.
"I can't believe it!" she said, after she'd been well enough to resume normal life. "Men who'd never said hello to me are asking me out!" It was a new world to her, as if an ordinary person woken up as a powerful politician, or a movie star. S. was shocked at how many of the men now noticing her weren't the dumb, superficial kind of men she'd previously thought were the primary type who'd be that way, but intelligent, sensitive men who held their own in conversation with her. (Did I mention how smart she was? She got what they call in the U.K. "high marks" at university.) She dated, had fun. If any of them became serious prospects for something long term, I was never told of it.
Here's the coda to this story: S. became ill again. Again, the disorder wasn't diagnosed. At first they thought it was malaria (she'd traveled in Southeast Asia), then a liver disorder that made her retain too much iron -- or was it copper? Experts were called, specialists converged. Many of us Americans take a dim view of nationalized healthcare, but S. had great care and was moved to King's Hospital, one of if not the best in London. I got an email from a close friend of hers telling me S. died in early September of 2002.
I went to her funeral. Over half the people there were men.


7/20/2010 7:18:10 PM
Why would anyone put their political opinions on this site? I've had subs who see eye-to-eye with me and others who are extreme opposites. In both cases, we didn't focus on that and our relationships were fine. But if they had gone on and on in their profiles or posts about how stupid and dangerous this or that politician is, I doubt I'd have ever contacted them. 
And I've never seen anyone here express their opinions on such matters well. Few if any of us on here are full-time, professional political or news analysts and are usually just repeating phrases they've read or heard elsewhere. It's painful and embarrassing to read.
Much of this is also true when it comes to religion.


7/19/2010 10:44:27 AM
I love the way this site calculates the distance others are from you, but it's a little deceiving. I assume it's straightline and not road distance they're giving. I'm amazed how many people who are in places I've never been near are only 180 miles from me. "I could be there in just a few hours!" I think. Then I realize that it'd take at least five hours to get there and that I don't have a car.

7/16/2010 4:59:44 PM
What they say about men being visual creatures is true, if I'm an example. This too-hot summer in my area has women baring much, and the sight of young, smooth, firm flesh makes me froth inwardly even as I maintain a calm outer countenance. Dopey with heat, I want to snap the little straps holding up their gauzy tank tops, bare their breasts, throw them over my shoulder and swing through the trees to my aerie where they will sire my sons.
I know what idiocy this is. While I find many of my female coworkers in their 20s fascinating, intelligent women, there are gaps. Generational differences, perceptions on life that come with age. I'd crave the company of someone within a decade of my age before two weeks passed.
The importance men have of the visual combines with the dimness of some of them to actually think sending a photograph of their genitals to a woman will impress them. How any man can be that stupid is beyond me. They are as clueless as women who describe themselves as being sarcastic as if it's a plus and say they're seeking "soulmates."
At the same time, though, I think how nice it would be if some of the women I correspond with here sent me a nice nude photo of themselves. I know it would be a brief, shallow delight and cheapen the bonds we have with words, but a small part of me wants it nonetheless.


7/13/2010 6:57:41 PM
A brief rant for those who like to play with colored typefaces and backgrounds. For centuries, it has been economically feasible and physically easy to use just about any color of ink and paper when printing books and periodicals, yet the overwhelming majority have been printed with black ink on white paper. Why? Because it's easier to read. Attractive fonts and layouts are fine, but ultimately it's the words that matter. 

7/13/2010 6:44:19 PM
Here's a silly thing I've found myself doing on this site. When I read someone's journal entry and they're venting about this problem or that and I write an encouraging note to them, I find that no matter what I say in the note, ending it by saying "Good luck!" still sounds sarcastic and mocking somehow so instead I say things like, "I wish you well in your quest," which sounds like I'm in a Victorian adventure novel. 

7/12/2010 7:28:25 PM
I've been liking apocalyptic literature and movies lately. I've always liked it to some extent, I suppose. The last man alive scenario appeals to us all. Well, except women, of course, but they have their last woman alive fantasies, I trust. These stories appeal to us because we picture ourselves as the heros, even though the reality is that we'd more likely be just another rotten corpse. We like the simplicity and urgency life gains when our only concerns are primal ones.
A fallacy of these stories, however, is the suddenness with which the end conditions occur. They assume nuclear attack, or a super virus of some kind, has wiped out all but a few good people and a few marauders, zombies, vampires, mutants to serve as the antagonists. For anyone alive today, even the very young, what will happen, if anything, will be a gradual decline, a slow slipping down, not noticeable from day to day or even week to week, until those visions of the future will seem, to those living in them, entirely normal and drab. In fact, it all may have already begun. 

7/12/2010 2:43:59 PM
Not to get all competitive and nationalistic or anything, but when it comes to countries, I'd have to say Australia has a higher percentage of very cool people on this site than other nations do. Their population is just 25 million, compared to America's 315 million, yet well over half of the Australians on here seem like great, fun people. 

7/12/2010 8:52:28 AM
Here's one way I know I'm getting old:
Friends of mine are moving from one apartment to another next month. "Guys," I said, "just remember that if you need any help moving, any at all, to call a mover."
There was a time I'd have been happy to carry boxes for hours and get paid in pizza and beer.

7/12/2010 12:19:39 AM
I only read the recent journals by women.
Here's what turns me off when I read them:

1. Shitty spelling, punctuation, webspeak like "lol," if the writer is over 14 years old
2. Weird font colors on weird background colors that make it impossible to read
3. Long, long, long erotica. Some might like it. This is a personal list.
4. Political rants, no matter whether or not I agree with them. Dull.
5. Multiple posts of just a few words that don't make any sense
6. Poetry
7. Deep thoughts. I like people who are as dumb as I am

7/8/2010 5:25:08 PM
Like just about everyone I know on this planet, I used to require covers in bed to sleep. I don't know why humans are like that. It may be our lack of fur, it may have to do with the womb, or it may simply be what we're more used to. Years ago, though, I lived overseas in a sub-tropical climate. There was snow there in winter, but not every winter. I didn't then, and don't now, have an air conditioner. In summer my apartment would get as hot as 105 degrees for days at a time. I broke myself of the need for covers and got used to having a fan blow directly on exposed skin (it's a myth that that can lead to colds, pneumonia, lupus, hangnails, etc.). Doing this has served me well many summers in my Northeast U.S. city and is coming in handy during this one.

7/6/2010 4:56:41 PM
It is much too hot in my East Coast city today to think, talk, write, sing, rap, trill, tweet, text, email, post, cry, shout, whisper, whistle, hum, rhyme, etch, draw, paint, sculpt, film, sign, or send smoke signals about anything except how hot it is today in my East Coast city.

Yes, that's right ... my brain is fried.

7/5/2010 8:59:07 PM
Sometimes I'll see a journal entry I like so much I'll respond and, while responding, an insight will occur to me and I'll phrase it just right in my e-mailed response. Then I'll think that what I've said, though not brilliant, may be at least worth sharing with more than one person and that if I shift just a few words around and elaborate a little it could make a nice little journal entry. "But what if," I'll ask myself, "the person I wrote that email to sees it? She'll think I'm just some phoney asshole who cuts and pastes things I've probably stolen from elsewhere because she won't know which came first and even if she knew it wouldn't prove that I didn't."
So I don't do that and then if the woman I responded to writes back at all she only talks about other things in my message to her.
And I call myself dominant.

7/4/2010 6:56:47 PM
I was a crazy kid one summer. I was eight, I think, and I developed this sudden and weird modesty. I began to wear sweaters no matter how high the temperature got. I'd get a heat rash. It didn't last all summer and the impulse, thankfully, never reappeared. I remember adults saying to me, "Take that sweater off! It makes me hot to look at you!" I couldn't grasp that kind of empathy then. I do now and as I sit in my sweltering apartment on the East Coast during the start of what will be this year's third heat wave I feel exactly as they did when I peruse profiles here of women in rubber, latex or leather fetish wear. 

7/4/2010 2:51:42 PM

Oh, happy day! Ofunke28 has emailed yours truly. She describes herself as a female slave (perfect!) and as 5'6" and 132 pounds. She is straight and just half my age! She is African American, something I find odd as she lives in Nigeria. I'm not expert in these things, but I think that would make her African. Maybe African-African, but I think they may save ink and words by just calling themselves Africans in Nigeria. Or Nigerians. I really must go there so I can ask someone.

Anyway, I really think this one's going to work out, despite having a pretty large ocean between us (I live in Philadelphia, several miles from Nigeria). I've read her email three times and I can sense a great deal of devotion in it. I'll cut and paste the full text so some of you other women can get some pointers. Here it is: hi

Like I said, a keeper.


7/3/2010 6:23:30 PM
When I browse photos of women (my one and only interest) I notice that those with visible backgrounds frequently have boxes, wrapping papers and other things used in moving. I wonder why. Are female submissives often victims of forclosures? Do they skip out on the rent? Change abodes at a moment's notice? 

7/1/2010 6:26:17 PM
WARNING: To any institution or person using this site or any of its associated sites - Go nuts, baby, use it all! You have my permission to use any of my pictures. Hell, they're not of me anyway, though they do give you an idea of what I look like. Shit, the only one I have up at the moment is of a marble bust of a long deceased white guy. I tried posting an illustration of a rooster as a joke (Get it? A cock shot?) but the site kicked it out. Guess I'll have to find a chicken and take my own photo somehow. And the information from my profile, or anything I post in any of the forums or groups on this website? Sure! I try to make things interesting -- you know, laughs, deep thoughts -- and the more people who read it, the happier I am! Copy, save, print, re-post, forward to your friends, do it all without prior written consent! It's 2010 and this is the internet! And if you make a buck off it or get an A on a term paper, more power to ya, friendo!


7/1/2010 5:53:52 PM
There is an interesting article in today's New York Times about how to take a photo of yourself. Most of the information was from people at okcupid.com, a free vanilla dating website mostly for people in their 20s.
Women look better in the home, men look better looking away from the lens, and everyone looks better when they smile.
Not sure how much of this applies here, but it's something to think about.
You know what else I think about? I think about how much more I could get done in life if I didn't crash mentally and physically after dinner every night. And I don't even drink. But I feel as if I've been drugged after I eat my evening meal.

6/29/2010 5:48:08 PM
The dumb porn is the kind in which women say things like, "Oooo, look how big it is!" The dumb bondage porn is the kind in which women say things like, "No. Let me go. Stop. No. Untie me. Stop. Let me go," as they strain against cuffs that are held on by clips a racoon could undo.
That's the way I feel about BDSM relationships, too. If you don't dress like Barbara Eden and live in a bottle, don't call me "Master."
I know this eliminates a lot of fun, imaginative people when I say this, but I only want what's real about you.


6/25/2010 8:03:46 PM
Self-referential statements (or something like that), some made up by me and friends, some just heard through the years:

I'm not sure whether I'm indecisive or not.

Do you think I'm the type who likes being judged by others?

All generalizations are false.

This statement is a lie.

Never take my advice.

Death to all fanatics!

6/23/2010 10:09:38 AM
Women's journals fascinate me for a multitude of reasons. Here are two.
They're women and the male and female brain are different enough (we've all accepted that by now, haven't we?) that they can be like dispatches from an exotic land. Where I'll see a back yard with some bushes in it, they'll see an azalea garden, with aromas and colors that please them.
Second, I get a glimpse into a side of men you don't usually see. For example, I just looked at the profile of a woman who seems entirely nice, pleasant, and intelligent. And she's attractive. Here, she reports, is the total of a message she received from a man in Illinois: "Ever been fucked by a cactus, cunt?"
It's like I'm witnessing an autopsy, seeing organs once hidden and protected exposed and removed, rinsed of blood and visible in harsh florescent light.


6/22/2010 7:06:36 PM
Earlier today I emailed a very smart, classy lady and told her that I think I may have emailed her sometime before. She wrote back asking how that was possible, as I just joined this site today. I checked my profile. I joined one year ago today. And me with no champaign.
It's been unfruitful, my year here. I've had some great email exchanges, a few quarrels, but to date only one meeting which led to nothing. Well, we ate in a nice restaurant at least. Chinese.
You know what's funny about checking your own profile? It shows up under Who's Viewing Me? I'm tempted to write back to myself and tell myself what a wonderful partner I'd be but that I am, alas, straight.

6/21/2010 9:20:45 PM
How do mosquitoes know just where to bite you? And they seem to know when you've spotted them. Their brains can't be bigger than the dot of this "i," yet they still manage to suck my blood. Amazing. 

6/14/2010 6:35:19 PM
Please Criticize Me
That's right. Have at it. If anything I write here offends you or is just plain wrong, e-mail me and feel free to unleash. I'm amazed at how thin-skinned many people who have journals here are. I wouldn't spank them with feathers, their poor little behinds are so fragile. I've commented to others and never said anything that isn't 95 percent positive, but that tiny five percent makes some boo-hoo and get mad like little babies. "Why do you read my journal?" they whine. I'll tell you why. Because it's there. If you don't want people to read your writing, don't publish it. Learn to accept it when people say bad things about you. They're not always right or even usually write, but their entitled to their opinions. Show that you're secure and mature enough to take it gracefully. 

6/14/2010 2:42:36 PM
Friendly Advice
Download Firefox and use it as your browser when writing posts on collarme. Activate it's spell check feature. When a simple word is misspelled, correct it. People will think better of you. Not doing this to at least some degree is like showing up for a first date with bad breath and wearing frayed, stained clothes, brown shoes and a black belt, and you wouldn't do that now, would you? Of course not.
Not everyone who cares about these things is a total dork. Just me. Oh, and if you're over 14 years old, lose the "lol" shit. It's childish. 


6/11/2010 7:13:26 PM
I made all these Tom Swifties up. I had a manic burst over a year ago and they just flowed out of me. I'm not saying you won't read or have read identical ones, but that's the nature of a narrow band of humor.
  • "I can't click my fingers!" he snapped.
  • "There's moisture on the windows because it's cold outside," he said condescendingly.
  • "I have a new light bulb!" she said brightly.
  • "I'm worried about the situation in the Middle East," he said seriously.
  • "And I also don't like arithmetic," he added.
  • "Your frog's dead," he croaked.
  • "Sure, I'll try some venison," she said gamely.
  • "I'm the best phlebotomist there is," he said vainly.
  • "The hairdresser did a good job," he said dutifully.
  • "Have you traveled in France?" he asked nicely.
  • "You're a son of a bitch," she sobbed.
  • "I got caught shoplifting in Saudi Arabia," he said offhandedly.
  • "Ah, they taste like chicken," he croaked.
  • "Your pencil's dull," she said pointedly.
  • "But global warming is real!" he said heatedly.
  • "I love evergreens," she opined.
  • "It's time I put my gear away," he said stoically.
  • "I ... used to be ... in ... a circus," he said stiltedly.
  • "I may cut off your electricity," he said darkly.
  • "Don't forget the rock salt," she said icily.
  • "I don't think that shellfish meal is sitting well," he said clammily.
  • "Go easy on potato chips," she said wisely.
  • "I can't afford more duct tape," she said tearfully.
  • "If I pay cash, how about a discount on these beads?" she said craftily.
  • "Get that dog out of here!" he barked.
  • "Piglets!" she squealed.
  • "Feathers!" he chirped.
  • "We're out of preserves!" he said jarringly.
  • "I didn't get into Colgate," he said, crestfallen.
  • "That's a nice toupee," he said peacefully.
  • "Tom and Dick are the only ones here!" he said harriedly.
  • "It's a porn movie!" he ejaculated.


6/7/2010 9:04:39 AM
It shouldn't, at my age, but it still does surprise me how captive we all are to so much external stimuli. The weather in my area broke last night after a lengthy heat spell and I feel ... born again.
The heat waves in my part of the East Coast are called "oppressive" for a reason. They're as confining as strong rope and good knots, though without the fun and security and other benefits of that.
The sun, newly bright, reflects off windshields with sharp intensity and I can't help looking at it, stupidly, letting it blind me for minutes afterward.
The only disappointing thing about the recent change is that the storm front bypassed us. My city could've used a good rinse.

6/4/2010 9:08:07 AM
It's funny when you think about what you're supposed to learn and what you really do learn. Years ago I read a column by a woman who said that two decades after graduating college the only thing of practical use she retained was that you can cover nail holes in apartment walls with Colgate toothpaste.
I've read men's magazines for 30 years now. Esquire, mostly, with occassional subscriptions to Men's Health. I must have spend days, cumulatively, reading advice. Yet if you asked me now, I can only come up with two things I keep in mind.
One, always go with plain fronts when buying pants.
Two, and this is a good one, after urinating, put a finger behind your scrotum and press, sort of rolling from back to front. You will never have to shake your penis again to avoid getting drops of urin in your underware.


6/3/2010 3:34:35 PM
When I was young and even not so young, in my 20s, I used to be baffled by how often I'd see a lone shoe in a street. I just could not figure it out. I'd see them no matter what city I lived in. I figured it would always just be one of those imponderable things, like red paint on quarters (another thing I often see).
Finally I realized that I was seeing these shoes around the first of the month. Not always then, but more often than not. I put two and two together (four) and deduced that the shoes I'd been seeing all those years had fallen out of cars and pickup trucks as people were moving from one abode to the next.

Newsflash: Wow, someone read a post of mine! Not only that, he answered the question about red quarters for me:
The red quarters were painted with nail polish. The guys that serviced juke boxes in bars would give a handfull to the bar owner. He was to play the box when business was slow in hopes of picking business up. Service guy would give them back to the owner next time he collected the money.

Now, where are the women in my area who read my posts and can't wait to be my subs?


6/1/2010 5:36:58 PM
I'm feeling feverish these days though I have no idea at all whether or not I actually have a fever. When I'm ill my perceptions change and I find new profoundity in old topics.
My sermonette today is, get out there and enjoy Life. Now. I visit my parents each week. They're in awful shape. Canes, diapers, constant pain. A brave show of living as usual as they wait for the end. Then I visit this site and see a huge number of women in my age bracket (over 40) say on their profiles, "I'm really just looking right now ... not ready to meet."
What are you waiting for? Do you honestly think that the physical feelings you'll get from human contact are going to improve over the next ten years? Do you think men will find you more  desireable at 55 than 45? I'm not saying you should rush into anything if you're truly not ready, but shit or get off the pot aleady. Or to put it more delicately:
 

Gather ye rose-buds while ye may,
Old Time is still a-flying:
And this same flower that smiles today,
Tomorrow will be dying.

5/28/2010 6:11:33 PM
When I first started this stuff, and at times between then and now, I thought you had to have all the rituals that went with it or it wasn't real or lacked meaning. As time has passed, I've come to know myself enough to be honest and say I find it silly. Not to criticize those who don't, but I do.
Call me by my name, and my name is neither "Master" nor "Sir." If I have you stand, sit, or lie a certain way and I tie you a certain way, it's not to teach you obedience -- you know who's in charge -- but because I find you beautiful in those positions. All the fake stuff puts a barrier up, a shield. It's like groups of men who can't get together and talk sincerely so they have to play Dungeons and Dragons or watch sports games on TV.
This activity is many things to many people but to me, it's largely about living fully my half of a wedding vow, "to have and to hold."

5/27/2010 7:11:30 PM
Wow, this site crashes and slows down a lot! Then again, the price is right. But surely their advertisers pay something and it can't make them look good to get associated with something so glitchy as collarme is. Lotta recent grads out there with good computer skills who'd make the site work for very little money ...

5/17/2010 6:58:15 PM
An excellent reason for young subs to avoid geezers like me is this: I'd tie you tightly and, just when you think things were going to get interesting and fun, I'd lecture you.
My topic today would be sound equipment. The stuff many young people listen to music on is awful. I had better kitchen radios in the 80s than what you're using. And yet I read that music is considered something that should be portable, compressed files blasted through little bud phones, competing with traffic and other city noises as you wend through your day. Wrong, wrong, wrong. Music is art. Get a good system and good speakers and play CDs at an appreciable volume. Not loud enough for neighbors to hear; loud enough that if the singer were in your room singing live you wouldn't be able to tell the difference.
Other lectures you'd hear from me would include:
* The value of an ingdirect account and putting a little away every month, beginning now
* Why you should try to read one good novel every three weeks or so
* How important it is to get to work on time
* Ways to see the world inexpensively and without being in a tour group
* Features to look for when shopping for a digital camera
* Easy grammar tips anyone can learn
* Why reality shows suck
* What great things newspapers were 20 years ago
* The simplest -- and only -- diet advice you'll ever get
You get the idea. Avoid me at all cost. It's for your own good.

5/15/2010 6:34:30 PM
A poser: How much time do women spend on this site per log in? Every time I'm on and I see that someone I've had  a friendly correspondance with is on and I send a brief message saying hello, how's it going, etc., by the time I hit sent they've logged off. It's like I'm the smelly, pushy guy at a party and the slip out the back door when they see me coming ... (I'm neither smelly nor pushy, by the way.)

5/14/2010 8:55:44 PM
Q: How do you stop a dog from humping your leg?
A: Roll him over and suck his dick.

That one always slays me. Really.

5/14/2010 9:26:01 AM
Powerful feeling of deja vu today, which is sometimes, in my case, stimulated by sudden aerobic exercise. Funny thing, deja vu. It's a brain fart -- a woman with a tumor once had it all the time, wherever she went even when having been there was impossible -- but it feels so real. If only it were real and you could pick horses or Powerball numbers with it ...

5/13/2010 6:07:34 PM
I wonder if there's some kind of algorhythm that determines what you first see when you go to collarme.com, before logging on. Either that, or some people are on here way too much. I always seem to get the guy in the red shirt, sitting in an armchair. "Thank you for looking at my profile," his profile begins. It's like you've accidentally tuned in to Masterpiece Theatre. I also get the hoodie guy with binary code for a face.
I wish the site knew who I was before I log in. That would keep me from seeing people I have no interest in meeting. Fat guys with blank stares wearing girldles, that kind of thing. Kudos to those with the guts to post their faces here. I can't imagine doing that. I'd wonder whether every snicker I hear from behind another cubicle at work wouldn't be about me. Really, you guys are either brave and confident or foolhardy.

5/11/2010 5:24:52 AM
This month and next month has virtually all of our heights in feet and inches in the dates. I notice it every year, then forget by the next year then notice it again. I'll be going through my day, nothing special happening, then I'll write the date and go, "Hey, that's my height." Then I feel stupid for finding that entertaining in any way. And the whole thing repeats the next year.

5/4/2010 7:59:47 PM
I bet that people on CM either don't watch or seldom watch reality television shows. We, after all, make our fantasies real. Who would want to watch a show where people plot against one another for revenge over hidden socks or similar nonsense? 

3/23/2010 9:22:15 AM
I'm always disappointed when I wander around this site and look at forums and chats. There's so much love of and obsession with rules and protocols. Is as if it's just a big game of Dungeons and Dragons. (No, I never have.) I shouldn't judge, I know. But I find that engaging in a BDSM relationship gives me and my partner more freedom, not less. It levels us off, makes us feel powerful or, in her case, honored and important. I can't get off my block without following rules and signs. I have no desire to make some up.  

3/18/2010 9:55:41 AM
Spring! Well, not yet, but in two days, officially. Time at last for air-eating exercises outside. I'm one of those who doesn't exercise as much as he should when the weather is bad, and this year was bad. 

2/11/2010 9:52:47 AM
The most surprising thing I read in submissives' entries here is how many men don't understand what submission is all about and approach them with abusive, degrading attitudes. Are men really that clueless? Don't they see what a wonderful and valuable gift they're being offered? I guess this isn't the place to rant about it as few men will read it, but the snow is too deep to do much else. 

1/5/2010 4:53:02 PM
I'm always polite to everyone who contacts me here. My Internet ethos is to never say anything online I wouldn't say to someone's face. One thing that's surprised me here is how many will delete an email without reading it. Ouch! If you don't respond to my email, I'll get the idea, but unless I've said something really awful (which I don't do), at least be courteous. 

11/11/2009 6:56:47 PM
I've noticed something just in the past few days. Everyone is bored. Bored to tears. No real reason, nothing specific is or isn't happening. There's simply a sameness to social and political discourse, and I and others are yawning mere paragraphs into the writings of top columnists. BDSM activities liven things up. When I do them, it's like visiting another planet with a friend. Everything's different, but having that significant other person with you grounds you enough to make it all real. 

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Mizzblueberry
 
 Age: 27
 Buffalo, New York