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christianwoman2

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Apparently I am to picky, but why shouldn't I be? It's my life, my time, my energy, so why shouldn't I value it? Why shouldn't I set high standard's? If I am confident in what I have to offer, why shouldn't I chose carefully who I offer this to?
- ***** DISCLAIMER**** CAN'T POST PICS OF ME, DUE TO ME BEING IN THE PUBLIC EYE. IF AND WHEN WE HIT IT OFF I WILL BE MORE THEN HAPPY TO SEND A PIC OR TWO, OR CAM VERIFY VIA SKYPE*****

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12/21/2017 6:41:35 AM
Trust comes before Obedience.

10/5/2017 3:59:44 PM

Your partner doesn't need to be perfect, they don't have to be so beautiful like super models, they don't have to have strong muscles, they don't have to be saints who never do mistakes and they don't have to be super humans who never break.

You choose them for who they are, with their strength and weakness.. with their ups and downs.. with their happiness and sadness and with their pros and flaws..

you chose them because you love them the way they are.. the way they make you feel, the way they pleases you or dominate you or just be with you...

you chose them because they are worth it , because you found something with them that you couldn't with anyone else .. because with them, you can simply be you

With the little flaws, the sad moments , the little mistakes, the down times.. they are perfect in their own way.. more perfect than any super model.. perfect than the rest .. perfect than any label or title.. perfect because of who they are


9/3/2017 7:06:40 AM
REAL PRIVACY NOTICE: If you are on Fetlife or any other social media site, and post information about yourself or pictures that you take or share, they can and will be used elsewhere on the internet, and by law enforcement and other government agencies, and in some cases, can be used against you for the purpose of securing search and/or arrest warrants, or in civil cases. Posting silly disclaimers or warnings is not going to protect you or your rights. The only thing you can do to protect copyrights of your materials is to NOT post anything about yourself, or post pictures on your own website with a copyright notice, and even then, they may be used elsewhere under the Fair-Use Doctrine, and still may be used against you in court. Please cut and paste this, instead of the silly warning that everyone is sharing, because the other one is spreading a false sense of security, not to mention ignorance of internet, copyright and IP laws.

8/22/2017 10:25:37 AM
It is only when we silent the blaring sounds of our daily existence that we can finally hear the whispers of truth that life reveals to us, as it stands knocking on the doorsteps of our hearts. ~K.T. Jong


People often say that this or that person has not yet found himself. But the self is not something one finds, it is something one creates. ~Thomas Szasz, "Personal Conduct," The Second Sin, 1973


"Dare to risk, dare to dream my friend, he said.
And if, in your risk and your dream you fall short...
Dare to pick up the pieces and try again.
For daring to try, you shall find a reward in itself.
Dare to trust, dare to care my friend, he said.
And, if in the process you feel hurt...
Have the courage to trust and care again.
For daring to trust, you shall find comfort and success.
Dare to try, dare to be different my friend, he said.
But if in your trying and your difference you feel ridicule,
Dare to rejoice in that difference. For it is that difference
Which shall set you free... to find your ultimate self."
~Author Unknown

8/17/2017 8:20:00 AM
Dominants...
Ask yourself this question….
Would you still want to be a Dominant, even if it meant there would be absolutely no sex involved? If you honestly cannot separate being a dominant from the sexual aspect of the lifestyle, Then perhaps your reasonings for wanting to be a Dominant are a tad superficial.
-Michael Makai


Also I am not in the lifestyle to simply be a toy or plaything. This lifestyle is a serious one to me and I take it to heart. I am not a sexual slave and don’t really have an interest in a bedroom relationship.
I feel the lifestyle is one of self discovery through love, trust, and obedience. There is much more than kink. Much more than bondage, floggers, blindfolds, ect. Each of these tools have a part within the lifestyle. Have a part within the relationship but they are not what the relationship is about. To me.. it is about control. Not just in the bedroom. Not just in the home.. but control at all times. I thrive on this control and growing from it. I don't want to deal with players, and I don't want to deal with Desperate beggars... if you’re one or the other please don't bother. insecurity and drama have no place with me.

7/31/2017 7:33:15 AM

D/s is based on human nature that is older than the human race. It can be clearly observed in other species. Humans have always gathered together to form societies that have hierarchies. D/s is part of being human. However, by the 1960s a set of abstract theories were adopted by many in the upper middle class that ran counter to human nature. An effort was made to impose these on others. Since this only worked in the abstract, by the early 1980s some wanted to get back to human nature and the term "D/s" was coined.

D/s is about the energy exchange between two individuals. It is the mental connection, not what the bodies do. It is not SM or BDSM any more than it is conservative or liberal. D/s is 24/7. By definition, it is what we are rather than a role we play in a scene.

In D/s there are rules and limits. If you have a problem with rape, you believe in rules and limits. If you are against child molesting, you have rules and limits. Those who say there are no rules may be uninformed and mean no harm. Once they get out from behind their computer they will learn they do have rules and limits. But often those saying such things are predators trying to line up their next victim.

Certain behaviors invigorate the energy exchange while others deplete it. Those with little personal integrity, or those who are insecure, arrogant or self centered, cannot maintain a strong energy exchange. Therefore we have guidelines to follow and we avoid voluntary close interactions with those who do not live by them. 

A D/s Lifestyle Code of Honor:

We treat others as we would like others to treat us.

We are Honest.

We keep our word.

We are Responsible.

We help those in need.

We teach only those who really want to learn and we respect our teachers.

We try to avoid arguments with those who have closed minds for that is a waste of energy. 

All sexual relationships are based on mutual consent.

We respect relationships.

We realize some may fall short of these at times.

We do not bring into our inner circle those who do not strive to live up to the above.

A Glossary of Terms:

Dominant: Dominants can be either male or female. They have learned to control them self while living honorably and responsibly to the extent that they can be trusted to guide and protect the well being of another who has chosen to submit to them. A True Dominant places the long term well being of his sub before his short term desires. Those who are controlled by their emotions or sexuality are not strong Dominants. For this reason men usually do not fully emerge as Dominants until they reach middle age. One is not Dominant if they are acting out of anger, vengeance or ego. Insecurity, not strength, drive such behavior.

dumbiant: Those who go around trying to be one up on Dominants and expect all submissive to submit to them rather than treat all with respect are not True Dominants. The are insecure dumbiants.

Energy exchange_ A consensual blending of two auras based on respect and affection in a way that build energy that usually is enhanced by building and sustaining a polarity based on difference to a highly esteemed other and a mutual concern for each other's well being.

submissive or sub: D/s is based on an energy exchange that creates a polarity. While one may lead, both parties are essential to the dynamic and need to be strong. Weak people make poor subs. By surrendering some things to a Dominant they can trust, a submissive becomes free to explore other aspects of their self. They know they are safe and secure. They decide who they surrender to and they have limits, things they will not do. Those may change gradually over time. Submissives can be either male or female.


5/19/2017 3:45:17 PM
Truth - The Acid Test
  

I got this from FlyingAl who got it from THEDOGCATCHER I love it there is Alot of truth to it. Thank you for letting me copy it :) sir.  

#1: When in doubt, throw it out! Don't waste your time with people that make you feel uncomfortable. Even if the guy was a real Dom, if his personality makes you feel uncomfortable, he's not going to be fun to play with.  

Test #2: 'You'd better call me Sir!' is the mating call of a HNG or control freak. Real Doms don't have to ask for titles, we earn them. Most real Doms will say things like 'Please, call me Mike...'
 

Test #3: 'I want you to take my collar before you play with me.' This is another common demand of fakes, most often made by control freaks. They have to isolate you from other people and their advice, and sometimes a little ole 'cyber-collar' is just the thing! Cyber-collars are worth less than the leather required to make one.  

Test #4: If you get an Instant Message that says something like 'On your knees you [slave, slut, bitch, whore, etc.]' This person is an HNG. Use some common sense here. Why waste time with somebody that's not even polite? There's a time and a place for these endearing terms, and it isn't online!
 

Test #5: 'I don't have to answer that question!' or 'It's not proper etiquette for you to ask a Master that.' These are examples of some the dangerous lies that control freaks and snerts use. This is the Acid test I personally think is the most important! A Dom had better be ready to at least try and answer every question you have, and honestly at that! It's literally your ass that's on the line! Never forget this!  

Test #6: 'It's my way or the highway!' or words to that effect, are the mating cry of the common control freak. Doms can have limits too, but it's your limits that count FIRST. Don't let any would-be 'Dom' tell you differently. Don't let any of the wannabe subs tell you differently either. Where Male Dom/fem sub play is concerned, it's always lady's choice!  

Test #7: Don't bother with online collars. Don't make decisions about a prospective partner based on his online play style. It's a very simple test if you think about it: Would a real-life Dominant waste much time on cyber sex and cyber domination? Please take my word for it; The answer is no. Forget it, once you've done the real thing, cyber is just too damn dull.
 

Test #8: Ask your prospect if he's ever made any mistakes during a scene. If he says 'no,' run for your life! If he says, 'very rarely,' at least be suspicious. Everyone makes mistakes, even if they are experienced and skilled. Sometimes submissives have limits they don't even know about, and even the most careful and skilled Dom in the world will trip over these occasionally. Remember, according to our good friends of the Christian faith, the last perfect guy to walk this planet got nailed to a tree for his trouble. So expect competence, but not miracles.  

Test #9: 'I'm a [bank president, captain of industry, combat photographer, self-made millionaire... yadda yadda yadda.]' Wouldn't it be nice to meet a rich Dom too? Sure it would! But use some common sense. How many captains of industry have hours to spend in an AOL chat room? Also, think about this personality profile; If this super successful, always-in-control person is really into BDSM, he's likely a submissive! Worse yet, it could very likely mean he is a control freak. I have met a lot of submissives that fit this ambitious profile, but not one Dom yet!  

Test #10: 'I'm 33 years old, and I've been a Master for 15 years.' Gimme a break! What are the odds? When you ask about a Dom's level of experience (and it's a good idea to do so) remember to do the math as well. 18-year-old boys don't care about the intricacies of BDSM; they want to get laid. Trust me on this one Ladies, I was an 18-year-old boy once! I personally believe that people do become what they are (be it gay, straight, Dom or sub) very early in life, but it takes maturity and training to be a Master. What are the odds a person became a Master when they were still using Clearasil?  

Test #11: Ask for references! Especially if he claims to be 'very experienced.' Talk to the references on the phone. Lots of HNGs have female screen-names set up to act as 'references' for them! I notice that a lot of newbies seem to have trouble with this concept. Which is understandable since in the vanilla world it's considered rude to talk to a guy's ex-girlfriend. However, in the BDSM scene it's the opposite; experienced Dominants should accept and accommodate this kind of request gladly.  

Test #12: 'I have three real-life collared slaves right now, but you can't talk to them.' OK, when you consider the ratio and all, this sounds possible. What makes this an acid test failed (and failed miserably at that) is the last part. I have met couples (and even triads) that really were looking for an extra person to add to the mix. This is not uncommon at all in the scene. But these couples were looking together. If a 'Dom' has anyone already collared to them, you probably ought to talk to her first!  

Test #13: 'I don't need safewords.' Well of course he doesn't! If he said this he's likely a snert and therefore he's never really been in a scene! Of course he might be a predator too, and then he wouldn't need safewords either. Need I say more?  

Test #14: 'My slaves trust me to set their limits for them.' If you hear a 'Dom' say this it's most likely because these slaves only exist in his mind. Or worse still, his 'slave' is simply the victim of spousal abuse. Even so-called TPE (Total Power Exchange) and other sorts of 24/7 (i.e. full time) BDSM relationships should involve careful and thorough negotiation.  

Test #15: 'I'm married, my wife can't know about us' If I have to explain this one to you, you've got problems. I have played with many married submissives in my time, but only with the express permission (and more often than not, participation) of their husbands. Safe BDSM requires complete honesty. You can't build a good scene on lies. There are plenty of people that will be willing to tell you differently; but please note, they will all turn out to be adulterers (and hence, liars) themselves.  

Test #16: Real Masters/Mistress's are not required to negotiate. That's a bullshit line if one was ever told. In the beginning, everything is open for not only discussion but negotiation. If you come across this one, run like hell.  

Test #17:JUST FYI If you've given your number to someone, it is with the expectation of receiving a call, verbal communication, and get to know each other. If all they're going to do is text once they have the number, don't bother exchanging numbers. As Steve Harvey says 'Ladies, if the man is texting you more than he is calling you...he's just not that into you!'  

Test #18: For the ladies: Please use common sense on any site. When a profile of a female contacts you and first rattle out of the box is 'I know a Male Dom/Master near you or that you would be a possible match for' don't you think it just might be a 'MAN' posing to get you interested. If the said Dom/Master is near or interested, don't you think he would have contacted you on his own site!!!  

Test # 19: if a female contacts you saying that she and her male partner are interested in you, but only he will make the initial meet up and that you may have sex without her, that there again, it's a man setting you up. Come on ladies, trust those instincts! A man that contacts me on his own is far better than a man posing as a woman to get in your pants. Those are the real fakes!  

Test # 20:Insert your own Acid Test here: You will learn much from your mistakes and missteps. If you form an online contact with a 'Dom' that falls through, analyze why it fell through. Don't make the same mistakes twice if you can help it.

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MissLeighton
 
 Age: 20
 San jose, California