4/11/2024 9:39:45 AM: Interesting day today.  I spent it in bondage in his car. Ankles in metal shackles, black out lenses in, white noise on, nappy on, both holes filled. plastic spiked nipple shields on, Gum shield gag in. wrists secured behind my back. Master, meanwhile went to get food leaving me in the locked car. I felt relaxed and calm, not knowing what was going on outside in the car park. I almost fell asleep I was in my happy place. It was a great way to spend an hour. this is what I love the most, the unexpected and the unusual  A perfect Thursday, also the sun was out so at least it wasn't cold today, unlike previous days    

4/8/2024 10:12:39 AM: So it's been a while since I've been on here, nothing much has changed. A lot of the same faces and profiles still looking for that 'one' perfect submissive.  Is there such a thing? Perhaps you are limiting yourself by having greater expectations of finding the one female who ticks every box instead of someone who you can learn from and they learn from you, who am I to say what is right or wrong. I've been very fortunate for the last 18 months to have found someone who gets me, knows me better than I know myself at times and to him I am very grateful and beyond words to express what he means to me. Life isn't perfect and I know that for as much as I love and adore him, he will never be solely mine. He won't be the one to tuck me up in bed at night, to hold me whilst I sleep when I'm hurting, and that is what I truly want and need.  My beloved mum passed away on the 4th of April and it's times like this that remind me I am alone, my Master does all that he can to help me, but ultimately he can't be with me, which adds to the hurt I'm feeling. I would love him to be free to be with me 24/7 and he knows it. I don't hide what I need and want from him, he is perfect just the way he is (apart from not being single).  I'm feeling very alone right now. 

8/3/2023 4:46:17 AM: It's been a while since I updated my journal, so here goes: 4 stone lost now, although it's getting harder to lose as I'm working out at the gym, turning the blubber into muscle. I'm enjoying cycling more, especially after buying a new bike. I'd forgotten how much I enjoyed riding the bike around, it's quite liberating actually. As a teenager I cycled everywhere and at weekends go out for a bike ride with my best mate at the time.  I'm loving that my legs are more toned now as are my arms, the rest is coming along. It has definitely made me more confident and now I wear shorts out and about and get some sun on my lilly white legs. lol I'm not going to lie, I love being caned, well, I love the bruises and marks left afterwards and the ache of fresh cane marks upon my backside, tenderly sitting down on a hard chair afterwards pushes my head back into subspace. I adore it, crave it and want it more and more.  All that I have received at His hand makes me very grateful that He has come into my life, and has given me back the will to live life and enjoy it more.  One very happy owned slave. 

3/4/2023 4:38:08 AM: I have been a collared and owned slave for some months now, since the end of November, in fact. It has been an interesting few months. Quite a lot of punishments given with the cane.  That collar that I craved so much, was locked on along with ankle cuffs, permanently. I couldn't be happier, with all that I have learnt and experienced at His hands. Weight loss of over 2 stone so far, fitter and have loads more energy - which is good, but it also means this slaves mind is more active too. Not always a good thing, especially when the mind is over thinks things and won't switch off.  Bedtime routines are working really well, edging, positions and lights out by 10pm, bondage at bedtime, no longer able to sleep without any bondage upon my body. Dummy and blindfold being a constant, along with wrist and ankles attached together and connected to the bed.  However, one really silly lapse in concentration yesterday caused Master some serious concern. I thought I'd unlocked the door for His arrival, meanwhile, I was hooded with headphones in and music on via ipod, not my phone as usual. Wrists secured to the bed with handcuffs, key hanging nearby, but being in a sensory deprivation hood with no eye holes, just a small hole for breathing, didn't help. Slave lay on the bed, waiting for His arrival, hearing the dog go wild between tracks. Eventually, Master found the back door unlocked and came in. But it was a few minutes of panic from me, until I pulled the ring off the bed that I was attached too. I knew it would come away with a good yank - Master, didn't realise as He viewed it on a camera in my room with limited views. The day together was kinda spoilt, but slave got to hug Master's body, an activity she loves so much.  Needless to say, yes, slave got a caning, one extra hard one and now is being made to wear a nappy 24/7 for a week, along with written on her udders 'dumb slut'. Last night she subjugated herself for Him, made sure she was uncomfortable during the sleeping hours, tiger balm, leg spreader, nipple suction cups, all part of her sleep, along with the normal things, bondage belt, bound udders.  As slave isn't leaving the house this weekend, bound udders remain, bondage belt and wrist cuffs all remain in place.  Currently on orgasm denial for another 6 days, 18+ days, but still made to edge for 20 minutes every night, with that and the bondage, this slave is constantly aroused and wet.   So, yes, it is possible to get what you want from this site. For those that still think this is about sex primarily, it isn't. There is more to a Master/slave D/s relationship that fucking, you just have to find the right person for your desires and needs. 

11/11/2022 4:13:02 AM: Why, just fucking why?