A new journey to my life is starting,

My sub and I are leaving WI in less than two weeks to move to Oregon. We are looking forward to the move and our new lives on the west coast. I shall seriously miss those in Madison.

I received an awesome compliment from a Dom that I have only met once real life and that was a while ago. It is nice to be remembered in such a positive light :)

>eh like i said..you have it, the knowing that you've been and done it before, the grace and confidence..you aren't easily forgettable

Thank you MB or making my whole day :)

I guess I need to update this journal entry it is very OLD...

I have found an amazing man who is now my collared boy. We have been together now for almost a year and half. We are beyond happy and things are going wonderfully for us. We do live together and have for over a year now.

I am not looking for another play partners or anyone else to add to our lives besides friends..

I do hope that those that are still seek find what they are looking for and will be as happy as we are together.

A new beginnig.

I have started on a new path.

I have told so many people that while they are waiting for the one for them, that they should use the time to better themselves in aspects of their lives. Whatever that might entail.

Well, I am taking my own advice for once - laughs -

I meet with a fitness trainer to help me with getting healthier. I will be working with two great people who has offered their time to help me on this journey and I am grateful for that. (Though I am sure I will hate them soon enough while I doing this) LOL

I will also be working on stop smoking -- again- last year I stopped for almost 9 months. So, I know I can do it again.

I am also going through some training at work that helps on communication and understanding people better (not that I think I will ever understand people) I think that will not only help in my work environment but also in my personal life.

This is going to a huge change in my life. I am hopeful that it will be successful.

I will journal once in awhile to keep myself on track of this new journey.

Wish me luck :)

Soft laughter filled the room as she looked down at the text that was on her phone. “grr damn it woman” She pulled her legs underneath herself as she leaned back against the pillows on the couch. She smiled to herself as she thought back over the day. She had been teasing her boy all day, touching him, pressing against him. Whispering soft things in his ear of the dirty, nasty things she was going to do him. She sent him out the door to work hard and frustrated with need and desire.

She had been texting him during the night while he was at work, continuing to torment him with her words. She knew if she provoked him enough with teasing and tormenting him, the more aggressive side of him would come out. She had done it before and she loved that side of him at times. Though they both knew who the boss was in the relationship there was times that his mean, aggressive side fed her masochist side.

She rubbed her thighs together as she felt that familiar aching she always got when she thought of him. God how that man could drive her senses insane. The thought of him, the smell of him, his beautiful eyes. She purred to herself as she responded to the text “aww baby, I know you love it when I tease you” She hit send and closed her eyes, spreading her thighs slightly as she slide her hand down to rub her fingers along the crotch of her panties. God she was so wet for her slut.

The phone buzzed and she opened her eyes to look down at the phone and raised an eyebrow “Just wait until I get home Mistress” She peeked up at the clock on the tv stand, he would be heading home in about 10 mins. Where the hell did the time go? Shaking her head slightly she smiled once more, sending a text back “I can't wait” quickly a reply came back “watch what you wish for Mistress”

She didn't respond to the text, she knew that she had provoked that side of him, letting out a soft sigh, and wondered how he would react this time. Last time was all about hot primal sex, it was so delicious that she couldn't help but want it again.

The time seem to go by quickly as she heard his keys in the door, she stood up and pulled her t-shirt down to cover her white lacy panties and took a step towards the door. He pushed the door open and his eyes went right to her, he narrowed them slightly and let out a soft growl as the door slammed a bit to hard behind him. Before she could even take a step back he had taken the four or five steps it took to reach her, his hand raising up and pushing into her red hair, gripping it tightly and jerking her forward towards him. His mouth going to ear as he growled, “you wanted this side of me Bitch, now you got it”

Without thinking her hands went up to grab at his wrist to attempt to break free of his grip. That movement caused him to jerk down and push her to her knees. “ohh no Mistress, you are not getting away so easily” Reaching out to attempt to stop the impact to the floor she let out a long groan of pain feeling her knees hit the floor and the pain shoot through her scalp as his hand pulled on her hair.

Jerking her head back, she looked up at him, letting out a growl of her own. Her dark eyes glaring up at him “Let me go now” He simply stood there staring down at her, let out a small chuckle and moved to the side of her, starting to drag her across the living room. Quickly trying to move up to her feet to be pulled behind him, she almost stumbled and fell forward “easy there Mistress I wouldn't want you seriously injured” once again he laughed and she let go of a string of cuss words at him.

An amused looked came across his face as he looked down at her, still pulling her forward over to the large leather ottoman that was placed in front of the couch. Still attempting to struggle free and continue to stay on her feet, she grabbed at his wrist, which caused him to yank her hair harder forcing a loud cry of pain to flow from between her parted lips. “Now, Now, Mistress why are you acting like this is not what you wanted?” he sneered down at her as he pulled her to the ottoman, his knee hitting the back of hers making her body drop down to kneel on the floor and leaniedover her to press her pretty face into the leather. How ironic she thought to herself as she felt the leather under her cheek. How many times had she done this very thing and bound him to this.

He pulled her upward so the top of her body laid over the ottoman, while her knees rested on the floor, pulled his hand from her hair and reached down to grab at her arms. At that instant she moved her upper body quickly to move from his reach. A sharp pain shot through her lower back as he pressed his knee into it to keep her from getting away. “Tsk Tsk Mistress being a naughty girl”

Those words sent her into a rage “Get the fuck off me” she screamed out, which turned into a muffled sound as he pushed her face back in to the leather. She attempted to turn her body slightly to glare at him. He lowered his eyes to her as he grabbed up her arms, holding her wrists together in one hand and undoing his belt with the other. “So, angry my Mistress, when you knew this would happen.” the words came out so casually it almost alarmed her. He quickly took the leather belt and twisted it around her wrists, pulling on it to make sure it was secure forced a groan from her as she felt the pull of her shoulders, causing a bit of pain.

He ran his finger tips up along her back and up a shoulder as he moved up in front of her. He bend at the knees and gently brushed her red hair from her face. She lifted her eyes to him as he spoke softly to her. “You are so beautiful Mistress.” He leaned forward and kissed her forehead, “Your safe word Mistress?” A long sigh flowed between her lips as she answered “red” He nodded to her, kissed her softly and stood back up moving slowly around her. She closed her eyes and wondered if she would regret this.

His strong hands moved along her body like he was playing a instrument. Her body reacted instantly as she tried to arch to his touch. He let out a soft chuckle as he grabbed the waist band of her panties and tugged them down to her knees, his hand dropping down to slide between her thighs. The words hit her like a slap and made her flinch. “You wanted to see what would happen when you provoked the switch in me? Now you will find out my slutty Mistress”

She rested her face back down onto the leather, biting her bottom lip as she felt his fingers start to slide slowly along the outer lips of her pussy. Her eyes widening slightly as she heard a click, and knew he had gotten his pocket knife and opened it. Feeling the cold blade run along her thigh, she let out a groan of pleasure and shivered as the goosebumps begin to rise on her thigh. He moved his hand to the waist band of the pants and cut through it on the left side, then the right side and pulled them away from her body. Sighing to herself thinking those were one of her favorite pairs. The though quickly left her mind as she felt herself lifted up slightly as he grabbed the back of her t-shirt. She let out a small cry of pain as he pulled the shirt tighter causing her shoulders to burn, then she heard the ripping of the material as he cut it down the back and across her shoulders pulling it free, leaving her naked on the leather ottoman.

His voice was low when he leaned down to speak into her ear, his breath warm as he whispered “So open and exposed to me” his hand trailed down to her shoulder to her hands that were bound together. Her body jerked and she felt the leather of the belt bite into her wrists. He stood back up letting out a soft laugh as he moved behind her and knelt between her thighs. His hands moving to her hips and down over her ass cheeks. She groaned out feeling the sensation of his hands on her flesh, her back arching slightly. His fingers trailed back down to her exposed pussy, a finger pressing between her outer lips. “Already so wet Mistress” with that he forced his finger into her tightness which caused her body to jerk forward and her head up as she cried out feeling his finger force her open. Sliding his other hand up to her hip to hold her in place, he twisted his hand to force his finger in deeper slowly starting to pump his finger in and out of her. Pressing her head down to the leather again, she bit down hard on her lower lip to choke back a whimper.

“Don't fight it Mistress, allow me to pleasure you” his words were almost loving as he pulled his finger almost out and pushed another into her. Turning her head to the side, feeling the slight slickness under her from her hot body against the leather, her dark eyes closed as she let out a soft moan, his thumb moved to push against her now swollen clit. Her body started to rock slightly as his fingers moved inside her tight folds, causing her juices to flow more freely. She heard a soft moan from his own lips, she could not see him, but knew by the sound he had unzipped his pants and released his hard cock.
Without warning his hand came up and smacked on the out side of her thigh, she gasped out almost choking “Fucking hell boy” the sting from the smack sending heat through her thigh. He laughed at her words as his fingers traced over the red hand print left there. He pulled his fingers slowly from her soaked pussy, a loud growl flowed from her as she felt her needy pussy become empty. His hand moved down and cupped her pussy lightly, lowered his hand to just bring it back up and slapping her pussy, over and over causing her to drag her knees forward and try to move away from his hand. Tears filled her eyes as the stings of the pain caused her cunt to ache more, her clit swelled until it throbbed unbearably. She lifted her head and shoot a look over her shoulder as a deep growl of displeasure exploded “you son of a bitch” A smirk slowly slide across his handsome face, “now, now Mistress, you do have a safe word” he mocked her, which only made her growl again. He knew she was a stubborn woman and would take a lot before she would ever admit defeat with a safe word.

She lifted her right leg slightly and pushed back, kicking him in the thigh hard enough to push him over. She pushed her chest hard into the leather as she continued to kick back. He let out a string of cuss words as he attempted to grab at her feet to stop her, the heels of her feet slamming into his legs. “God damn it” His knees forcing her thighs apart as he grabbed her hips and shoved his rock hard cock into her. She cried out and attempted to pull away, he reached up, grabbing her hair, yanking her head back. A deep growl flowed from him as his finger nails dug into her hips, forcing himself in deeper. “This is how you want to play it Mistress?” with that said, he pulled almost all the way out of her and slammed back in deep and hard, causing her to scream out. His eyes closed as the primal lust took over, his hand gripped her hair tighter as his hips bucked forward and back, fucking her hard and without mercy. The pain finally settled into a sweet sensation of aches and pleasure, her lips parted as her breathing become fast and ragged, the moans of pleasure turning to loud cries of need. “Ohh god yes fuck me” she cried out attempting to shove back against him. He released her hair to slide his hands to her shoulders, using them for leverage as he continued to slam deep into her, his own pleasure building as he felt her sweet warm juices coating his hard cock, her walls clamping down around him tightly as she moved with him. “Oh god Mistress” his words turning to desperation as she felt his legs start to tremble. A smirk slid across her pretty face as she lifted her head to the side slightly “Cum for me whore, give me what is mine” she demanded. Those words hit his ears and he lost complete control as he slammed deep into her, his groans of pleasure, the jerking of his hips sent her over the edge as she scream out as her own orgasm exploded through her body.

He gently laid his body down on hers, kissing the flesh of her arms and reaches up and undo the belt that held her wrists together. A sharp pain made her jerk her arms and pull them down in front of her to work out the soreness in her shoulders, and rubbed one wrist then the other. His words soft as he whispered “I love you Mistress” smiling she whispered back “ I love you too Mine” After a few moments she lifted her body up, turning slightly as she looked over her shoulder at him. “Pay backs are a bitch Mine” He laughed and nipped at her flesh, “yes Mistress they are, more so when you provoke a switch” He slowly slid out of her and moved back on his heels as he gently pulled her back onto his lap snuggling her close and kissing her lips. “Now, let me go bathe you my Goddess” She smiled and kissed him back.....

Her manicured nails slide up through her red hair, brushing it from her face as she reaches into her purse and grabs out the keys, letting out a long sigh , she sticks the key into the door and pushes it open. The day had been long and stressful and she was just glad to be home. Without even a thought she tosses her purse and jacket onto the love seat near the door and kicks off the high heel shoes that had been killing her feet all day.

Stopping and looking around, she raises a perfectly shaped brow at the silence of the apartment takes her notice. Her dark eyes scanning the living room, everything in it's place as usual. She slides her hands up to her shirt, slowly unbuttoning it and pulling it free from the waist band of her skirt, walking through the apartment slowly, stopping and looking into the kitchen. Everything clean and put away, but no sign of life. Turning slowly she departs the kitchen and makes a turn down the hallway, tilting her head slightly as she hears the faint sound of music coming from the bedroom.

A small smile slides along her soft lips as she pushes the door open slightly open and leans on the door frame. The sweet music flowing softly through the dimly lite bedroom. Her eyes slowly taking in the room, taking in the candles that have been light causing shadows to dance on the walls. Her dark eyes resting on the figure kneeling on the floor, his back to her. She grins as she watches him raise his head, his back straightening, he knows she is there, his body reacting to the very presence of his Owner, his thighs parting further, his firm small ass settling on the heels of his feet and the fluffy tail that he wears for her tucked slightly under him.

Pushing herself gently from the door frame, her hands moving to the side of her skirt, unzipping it, and wiggling her hips slightly to pull the skirt down her hips and round ass. She steps out of it and allows the shirt to fall from her shoulders, leaving her only in her black bar that cups her large breasts perfectly, the black lacy panties that hug her curves, the black matching garter attached to her thigh highs.

Noticing him shift slightly, he still has not once spoken a word, her eyes soften as she notices the candle light bounces off the simple silver chain that he wears around his neck, the symbol of his ownership to her. Moving up behind him, she pressing her knees against the middle of his shoulders, her hands dropping down to brush along his handsome face. Automaticly, he leans his head into her hand, and lets out a soft moan of pleasure feeling her touch him. The beautiful strong woman that he loves and who owns him.

Spreading her thighs apart she bends at her knees and lowers herself down behind him, pressing the inside of her nylon covered knees against his hips. Leaning forward her large soft breasts press into his back he leans back against her with a whimper, his body shivering at the very feel of her. Her soft lips trailing along his shoulder as her hand moves slowly around his hip to slide between his thighs, feeling him already hard and ready for her. As her fingers wrap around the thick shaft of his cock, his head falls back slightly and thighs part wide, his ass coming up off the floor as he lets out a long drawn out moan, and the first words he had spoken since she arrived home. “ohh my Goddess” his hips jerking slightly as he fights to hold still. She grins to herself and slides her other soft hand up around his neck, squeezing slightly and forcing his head to rest back on her shoulder, her lips close to his ear as she starts to stroke him slowly.

The warmth of her breath flowing along his ear as she whispers to him, gripping his cock harder, “my sexy dirty little whore, all needy for me” Her mouth drops down to his shoulder and sinks her teeth into his flesh, his body tensing, his body moving upward as he presses his shoulder harder against her mouth, a growl of pain and pleasure burst forth from his throat as his hips start to rock forward. He drops his hands down and reaches back, griping her thighs tightly. Bracing her soft curves harder against his back, she leans to slightly to the side, giving her arm move room to move. Her arm stops moving and just holds his now throbbing cock in her hand, she raises her mouth from his shoulder, brushing her tongue along the mark left there, his body hips jerking slight forward trying to press into her hand as his body rocks forward a loud cry of of need flowing from him “ohh god Mistress please”

Grinning she moves her soft lips to his ear and whispers, “show me what a dirty whore you really are, fuck my hand and give me what is mine” Before the words are fully out of her lips, his hands push harder into her thighs, pressing back against her as his ass lifts off the floor, his hips jerking forward to push his needy cock into her hand. His neck turning, pressing his mouth against her neck, moaning against it, his breathing coming faster and harder. Words spoken only to broken by his cry of pleasure, “Your whore, Mistress, Your slut,.... anything and everything for you..” She lets out a soft moan hearing his words and his whimpers of need, lifting up on her knees a bit more to keep him balanced. She cries out feeling the pain shoot through her neck as his teeth sink into her flesh, his body shuttering, as he looses himself in the desire that is overwhelming his senses. She reaches out and slams the palm of her hand against his face.. “cum for me my whore, give me what is Mine”

Feeling the sting of the slam he releases her flesh and sucks a deep breath in as his body tenses and his hips jerk once more as he explodes with pleasure, his lips parting as he lets out a long howl of release.

Her hand slowly slides down his chest as he goes slightly limp against her body, his cock still jumping slight as it continues to release, she softly smiles and kisses his cheek softly, “you make me very proud Mine” He smiles, letting out a soft sigh and whispers “thank you Mistress”

Motions to you to take a seat in the large leather chair across from me as I settle down into my own. Sliding my legs under myself as I get comfortable, “Do get comfortable, I have a story I wish to share with you” Smiling as I take a sip of my drink, placing it back on the table as I start to speak.

Nothing turns me on as much as watching my boy get excited. The more delirious be becomes, the faster I bolt into my own head space, and I had no doubt this would be any different than any other time.

I looked over at my boy's body slowly. Tugging on the ropes that I had slide around his wrists and attaching each wrist to his ankles, making sure they were secure. I am glad he has long arms because securing his wrists to his ankles didn't make him terribly uncomfortable, not for the first two hours, anyway. With him bent ever so slightly backwards, his entire chest, midsection and delicious parts were exposed for my pleasure.

I moved a chair and sat it in front of him, placing my stocking feet onto his thighs.

He looked down, then at me as he smiled.

“Don't get any ideas,” I cautioned him. “This is my world. It's just your time”

His eyes crinkled, like they always do when he is amused but not sure if he got the joke. This time, I was pretty convinced he was clueless, but he'd catch on soon enough. He always catches on, just sometimes a little to late.

“Want a blindfold?” Tilted my head slightly, I asked causally so he wouldn't mix this up with standing in front of a firing squad. At first he shook his head side to side, then he looked at me and asked,. “Do I need one?”

“I have a new one,” I stated just as causally, my dark eyes slowly looking over his bound body. “Leather and sheepskin, Take a look.”

He was getting just a little antsy by this point, he usually figured out what I wanted by this time, he seemed unsure. I love when he is uncertain. There's this tension that I adore.

“ Try it,” I suggested and before he had a chance to complain, I wrapped it round his head, covering his beautiful eyes in a wad of sheepskin and leather. The buckle held it firmly in place and I didn't even have to ask if he could see anything.

Lowering just my finger tips to trail along his shoulder, I watched him react to my touch, First one shoulder then the second, broke into a ballet of motion that greeted every part of his skin. As I sat on the chair, I brought my fingers to his chest and drank in the glory of his reactions, as he sucked a great gulp of air, I felt my thighs tighten.

I leaned lower and dropped my fingers to his midsection, watching as his body swayed to my rhythm. By now, his body begin to sway and he leaned towards my touch, I moved my fingers to his other side. The tempo was mine.

Dropping my fingers and lifting my stocking covered foot, I nudged it against his belly, his thighs. Lifting my fingers to stroke his neck, his face and arms. I allowed his fingers to try to grab at me unsuccessfully. And then the most amazing thing happened.

He didn't just groan or moan. His lips parted and he said the single word that make me hotter than any other word he has ever uttered.

“Please.”

Throaty and full of air, his single plea drove me closer and closer to my edge- to the magically place I yearned for. His voice was husky, sexy and deferential all in one syllable. Holding onto the arm of the chair for strength, I lowered my stocking covered foot closer to the place I knew he'd be unable to resist- the place that would push him to the brink of madness and challenge his obedience.

Glancing at the clock on the wall, I calculated I had been there about an hour. I knew his knees had to ache and I was certain that his arms were exhausted, but I didn't care- not at 'this' moment. All I wanted was to enjoy his suffering for me. And I hungered to hear him beg.

“Please.” was good, but it wasn't great. It wasn't enough.

His whole body was involved in playing out my fantasy, Swaying, dancing, lunging and humping as he tried to force his hips up to meet my foot. I laughed softly watching him, moving my foot at my own pace, this was for my enjoyment. Not his and I was not ready, not yet.. soon..

I had more to hear from his lips more to see from his body.

Feeling like the bottomless pit of desire, I required what I knew he was capable of giving me. Lust is one thing, but complete capitulation is a higher degree- and I wanted it.

He had to beg.

His words fell from between his parted lips and I am pretty sure he never let them go past his brain. They dribbled out to fast, to loudly with to much passion for them to have been edited. Pure desire was oozing out of him as his hips sought contact with the my soft nylon covered foot.

“More,” he tried to no avail, then. “please.”

The word “please gets to me. There's something about honest begging that makes me a little crazy.

He pleaded for more and I allowed a single poke of my toes against his hard cock, As he gasped, I felt my legs shudder and knew the time was close, for both us. With a sudden frenzy he raised his voice from a whisper to an immense growl.

“Now!” he demanded as I smiled at his unseeing eyes. “please!!” he shouted as his hips bucked and humped towards my foot. “Oh, god!” he cried out, the sound was music to my ears.

He was dripping all over the carpet. Later, I'd allow him to lick it clean, but for now, there was more – much more – that I wanted. Getting him to his edge was one thing, but taking him over it was something I more than enjoyed.

I had my sub on his knees bound ankle to wrist in a incomprehensible frenzy and screaming for more. The pleasure of hearing him beg and seeing him in this condition, send ripples of pleasure through my body.

When I removed my nylon covered foot from his cock, I felt him lunge forward, and widen his knees in expectation. I didn't think he was really thinking. Instead, believe his body just reacted.

That's when I realized he was almost there, on that edge of his personal nirvana, a delicate place, a location in which he requires prudence on my part to make sure he's all right. The only problem was that I was there too.

If he made of those fabulous little noises, I was going to lose it, right there. I studied his lips, his mouth, his cheeks full of two-day-old beard and waited for it. The was pulling at my insides, drawing me into myself as my mind got lost in sensations.

I refused to allow him to go that special place alone.

Sliding down, jerking my shirt up around my hips, I spread my legs wide and straddled his legs, I arched my back and slide down onto his thick hard cock. My arms wrapping around his shoulders as my wetness slowly opened up to take him. Pressing against his bound body, rocking my hips as I begun to ride him fast and hard. I felt him hiss into my ear “ohh my god Mistress”

I'm not sure whether I fell or jumped over the edge with him in my arms. I had leaped to somewhere glorious. Wave and after wave washing over me and his glorious groaning filled my brain with a kind of lusty greed that made me demand more and more. I couldn't get enough of watching him, holding him and feeling every drop of his strength ooze into my arms. If I hadn't bound him securely. I'm sure he'd have fallen over in his thrilling climax which filled me to overflowing with the glory of his passion.

I leaned forward against his body, breathing into each others ears trying unsuccessfully to compose ourselves. Softly I heard through is ragged breathing “Thank you Mistress” I smiled and whispered, “Welcome Mine”

What I hope to find someday

I find intelligence to be very sexy. Someone who is fun, witty, bold, a wonderful companion, and who dares to look you in the eye and ask questions.

Confidence, bearing, and the knowledge of WHEN to act submissive is equally important. (self-confidence is SEXY)

A self-confident submissive is a delight to withhold. He is sure of his value, comfortable of his worth, and displays his self-confidence with quiet pride, but never arrogance. He knows that when he makes mistakes, he will benefit from them by learning from them. His posture is straight, his physical positions are held comfortably, and his face is serene but focused. A self-confidant submissive has about him his own aura of control - and this adds not only to his worth, but also his Dominant’s pride

BDSM partnerships aren’t all play, play, play! I want a partner with whom I can carry on an intelligent conversation.

Nothing kills a relationship - faster than dishonesty. Be honest about your expectations, desires, needs, and wants.

Don't be a ‘doormat’ - I want someone who is able to ‘stand tall’ even when he is kneeling - somebody who is confident about his position as a submissive and realizes that it makes him wanted and admired. self-confidence is SEXY!

Have a good sense of humor it is very important. Sure - BDSM can be really serious stuff - but it should also be FUN. If we don’t laugh at it, and during it, every now and then, we become quite boring!

Some of the best BDSM relationships I have seen are the ones where partners share humor between each other. There is nothing wrong with a Domme and sub knowing when to kid and gently push each others buttons - a bit of mischief adds to the spice of the relationship - and gives Dommes a reason to break out the paddles..

Some who realizes that A Domme is not perfect, she is also human, makes mistakes, and is not always strong when the world out side comes crashing down around her.  Someone who can make her laugh when all she wants to do is cry.

If you are not really seeking anything real life, or able to relocate to Me, Do not even waste your or My  time emailing.
I want real life, online is just a tool to keep in touch with friends and meet new people.