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docilem730

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I am a sincerely submissive male. I have known of this part of myself for many years and never feel as much myself as when kneeling before a dominant woman. Interests include: CFNM, CBT, genital bondage, queening, foot worship, body worship, ass worship, chastity, orgasm control, anal penetration, watersports. However, mostly I love to kneel, literally and figuratively, before a dominant woman who likes and respects and enjoys my submission to her and who uses me for her pleasure. In my vanilla life I am well-educated, accomplished, strong, confident, and successful. I am a nice person and am in a position of authority and decision-making -- I hope I carry out these responsibilities with grace, intelligence, and respect. But in private, I am submissive. I want to kneel before a woman to please her, learn from her, and accept her training to be the submissive she wants me to be for her. I love feeling the power and control of a caring woman, a woman who not only accepts my submissiveness, but honors it and appreciates me for it. I don't see my submissiveness as weakness. I see it as a strength that I put in the hands of the woman who wants me. I will be her support, protector, and source of pleasure. I want to learn your needs that I may satisfy them and your rituals and protocols that I may serve you properly. Over the years, I have expanded on my interests and experiences in my journal. Hope you enjoy browsing through it. I do not have unlimited time and availability. But I do offer unlimited loyalty and devotion. 12/11/16 Since CS in its wisdom appears to have eliminated our lists of interests, I will note a few of mine here, in no particular order, just as they occur to me. If I forget some, I can modify this entry later. Perhaps there will be some interest.

queening, total body worship, genuine service/pleasure for a dominant woman, edging, orgasm control, genital bondage, CFnm, pegging, prostate milking, panties and other lingerie, being exhibited to women, nipple pinching, genital spanking, watersports. I do seek a dominant woman's guidance, training, and control, with the goal of pleasing her. I have been in self-imposed chastity for many months.

I'll probably think of more. I am not a very good pain slut, and I realize that does not make me a very appealing candidate for many dominant women. I think that if I had regular training, I could probably improve to some extent, but I am not a natural at it. I am more of an intelligent, imaginative, but sincerely submissive male.

Of course, I have lots of vanilla interests as well, which I would be happy to tell you about if you are interested. But we are all on this site for a reason.

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4/13/2018 8:09:54 AM
I am out of town in a hotel room watching femdom videos.  My balls are engorged.  I am sitting in bed naked from the waist down.  I have a 10 foot cord I brought with me wound and tied around the base of my balls and the long loose end of the cord tied to the leg of a table, so my balls are being pulled and stretched.  I would love to edge for the pleasure of a dominant woman.  Such sweet agony.

4/8/2018 10:08:02 AM
When I woke today with my morning erection, I thought of gently worshipping you with my mouth and tongue, bringing you your first release of the day.  Perhaps later edging for you to enjoy watching before receiving my oral service again.

4/2/2018 7:21:47 PM
I have never written a journal entry like this before, though I have certainly read many of them.  I don't want to join the chorus of disbelief and maybe I will delete this journal entry at some point.  I don't want to express negativity and hurt, but rather openness to what can be.  But sometimes the disappointments, dysfunction, and letdowns of this site just take your breath and energy away.  But then the hope and desire and need return and you continue to carry on.

3/29/2018 3:31:26 PM
I would love some new photos.  I haven't taken any lately because in my case it involves putting the camera on a tripod, composing the shot, setting the timer, then running around to get in the frame before the camera shoots.  Kind of a hassle.  Then downloading and moving the photos to secure private folders on my laptop.  It would be more convenient, and fun, to take photos together with a woman, either dom or sub.  I would have my photos taken with my camera and we could use her camera for her photos if she wanted some.  If you are a woman who would be interested, please let me know.  Thanks.

3/28/2018 9:36:00 AM
I seek a dominant woman to lead, train, and help me develop as a submissive male, but a dominant woman who also cares, respects, protects, and likes me as a submissive male.

3/10/2018 4:38:40 PM
Got a lot of work done today off my long to-do list.  Now looking at femdom art, which I love, and adding to my personal collection.

3/8/2018 6:38:07 PM
But mostly hoping for a connection with a dominant woman.  So that I can be myself, happily and openly with her.  I am past hoping that she will be local, and I am not available to be a 24/7 submissive anyway.  But I hope for a connection with a dominant woman who is comfortable in her dominance, has it well-integrated into her life, is not trying to make a big issue of it, would find me to be of some value to her, and would actually like and respect me as a submissive male.  I would hope that we could be friends first, like and care for each other, recognize the vanilla hurdles we have to work around, but still value each other, protect each other, and genuinely value each other in our lives.  I am old by most people's standards, though I am healthy and vigorous.  I hope to go on for a long time.  I came to an understanding of my submissiveness well into adulthood.  Once I understood and accepted it, it explained a lot and made it possible to explore who and what I really am.  I am a person who respects others, tries to consider their needs and views, and yet has my own strongly held views of what is right and just and fair.  I just need someone to care for me as a submissive male and who will let me care for her as my dominant woman.

3/8/2018 9:19:46 AM
Thinking of having my balls bound securely with rope and then pulled back between my legs.  Perhaps you would hold and control the leash?

2/24/2018 11:40:56 AM
Thinking and reading about prostate milking.  Not only for prostate health, but for controlling the submissive male.  Relieving the potentially harmful pressure in the prostate and ensuring normal flow of its secretions, but not allowing orgasm, thereby keeping the submissive male attentive to his Mistress's pleasure and needs.

2/14/2018 2:31:54 PM
Happy Valentine's Day to all the dominant women here.  Kneeling before you ...

12/27/2017 2:36:36 PM
Today I went home for lunch and when I had finished I went into a back room to edge.  I closed the blinds slightly, but I could still see out.  I lowered my pants and underwear to my ankles and lifted my shirt above my nipples so you could see.  My balls are so full that I was quickly erect and had to be very careful because I was quickly on the edge.  I had to mostly stroke the shaft of my cock and stay away from the ridge of the head which is so sensitive when I am so sexually charged.  I edged for five minutes or so and then got dressed to come back to work.  Pre-cum is dripping from my cock as I sit here at my desk.  I love to edge.  For me it is symbolic of my state as a submissive male.  Not allowed to cum unless instructed to by a dominant woman and specifically for her pleasure.

12/15/2017 10:32:27 AM
I am a firm believer in feminine control of the male orgasm.  For now, I am in self-imposed chastity.

10/21/2017 6:03:14 PM
 I would love to refresh your pussy with my tongue each time after you piss, Mistress.

10/21/2017 2:32:51 PM
Wish you were taking me by the balls and rubbing them between your legs to mark me with your scent, Mistress.

10/16/2017 7:05:27 AM
I think I need to be bound and have my prostate thoroughly milked.

10/8/2017 12:22:44 PM
When I was in eighth grade, I had a major crush on a student teacher, I think in English class.  She was probably eight-ten years older than me.  Then sometime in my later teens and twenties I began to crave having an older experienced woman who would teach me and train me in sexual things and how to care for and please and satisfy her sexually.  I have never lost that fantasy.  Of course at my age now, that fantasy is long since gone as a possible reality.  In my thirties I started to recognize my sexual submissiveness.  It took me quite some time to come to understand and eventually embrace it.  But for many years now I have loved that I am a submissive male, though I seldom have the opportunity to express it openly.  I have always said that I had no idea of my submissiveness until my thirties/forties.  So it is sort of amazing to me that it's only in the last few days that I have put those early cravings in my teens and twenties in perspective as the beginning of my submissive awareness.  It's never to late to learn about yourself.

10/7/2017 1:25:14 PM
I am so intensely aware of my submissiveness the last few days.  I am sitting here, not touching myself sexually, and precum is still dripping from my cock.

10/7/2017 11:40:11 AM
Earlier today, I read the profile of a woman who had a journal entry noting her love of rimming and anal service.  Not all women like that, but I do love to provide that intimate service for a woman who wants and appreciates it.  Love to hear her breathing change and the sounds she makes (including one woman I knew who was very vocal in her enjoyment of my tongue) as I rim and press into her bottom hole with my tongue.

10/6/2017 3:50:06 PM
I realize submissive males are a dime a dozen.  But I think I might be worth fifty cents for a dominant woman, near or far, who wanted me.

9/11/2017 3:25:21 AM
Good morning, Mistress.  This morning I woke early, thinking about you.  I curled up under the warm covers, on my side with my knees pulled up.  I pulled my cock and balls back between my legs and then just very gently touched the head of my cock.  No stroking the shaft,  No vigorous stimulation.  Just very light touching and caressing the head of my cock.   Around the ridge, the urethral opening, all around the head, very gently.  Thinking of you and how I love that I am a submissive male and that I know you.  So nice to be erect, not really on the edge, but highly sexually aroused, and feeling my submission to you.

2/5/2017 12:36:17 PM
I would say that the following list of adjectives might be used to describe me.

respectful, respected, accomplished, intelligent, imaginative, masculine, sincere, playful, humorous, alpha, thoughtful, introspective, curious, engaged, engaging, considerate

...but you get the idea.  Enough about the vanilla me.  I am also a sincerely sexually submissive male.  After all these years, I would love to find a woman who wanted me and before whom I could kneel in submission.  Could it be you?

12/11/2016 2:00:44 PM
Since CS in its wisdom appears to have eliminated our lists of interests, I will note a few of mine here, in no particular order, just as they occur to me.  If I forget some, I can modify this journal entry later.  Perhaps there will be some interest.

queening, total body worship, genuine service/pleasure for a dominant woman, edging, orgasm control, genital bondage, CFnm, pegging, prostate milking, panties and other lingerie, being exhibited to women, nipple pinching, genital spanking, watersports.  I do seek a dominant woman's guidance, training, and control, with the goal of pleasing her.  I have been in self-imposed chastity for many months.

I'll probably think of more.  I am not a very good pain slut, and I realize that does not make me a very appealing candidate for many dominant women.  I think that if I had regular training, I could probably improve to some extent, but I am not a natural at it.  I am more of an intelligent, imaginative, but sincerely submissive male.

Of course, I have lots of vanilla interests as well, which I would be happy to tell you about if you are interested.  But we are all on this site for a reason.

Maybe I should also put this journal entry on my profile as well for the casual passersby..

11/23/2016 3:34:40 PM
Not sure if anyone follows my journal, but I wish you all a Happy Thanksgiving.  Kneeling in gratitude and hopeful for the future, james

11/16/2016 11:34:46 PM
I have never been cuckolded, to my knowledge.  And maybe to be true cuckolding it would have to be with my knowledge and acceptance.  But I have certainly thought about it a lot.

Something to think about some more.

https://xhamster.com/movies/5382918/amateur_mature_cuckold_threesome_part_2.html

10/30/2016 1:45:10 PM
I never did masturbate.  I just can't do it without permission and instruction from a dominant woman and for her pleasure.   So chastity continues.

9/24/2016 9:25:09 AM
This is a difficult decision, but I think I will masturbate.  I have a tremendous amount of work to do with multiple deadlines looming.  And yet I can't concentrate and get much done.  I am so wrapped up feeling my submissiveness and longing to kneel and serve.  Such a strong desire to be in the presence and at the feet of a dominant woman.

It's been a long time since I have had an orgasm.  Probably not good for my physical health either.  But mostly it's because I need to get some work done.  Simple as that.  I do not anticipate actual pleasure from masturbating.  But I do think it will relieve the pressure in my balls, prostate, and mind.   And it is the pressure in my mind that is the problem at the moment.

I actually think I would be able to concentrate better if I were in chastity to a woman.  To know that she controls my orgasms and to dedicate my denial to her.  Better whether she allowed an orgasm or not.  What I need is to feel myself in submission to her, dedicated to pleasing and serving her.  To feel her care for me and control of me.

But that is not my current circumstance, so I am considering masturbating this weekend, just so I can get some work done.

9/18/2016 3:02:10 PM
As time passes, I realize more and more how important chastity and orgasm control are to me.  I am in self-imposed chastity.  It would not be natural or right to cum without the permission of the woman who controls me, so I don't.  But self-imposed chastity is hollow without being specifically dedicated to and at the direction of a dominant woman.  I need her and want to serve and please her.

8/11/2016 5:25:59 PM
It is so hard to find a dominant woman who would appreciate and enjoy me.  Most contacts are pros or fakes, but there are real Dommes also.  A very few are local and some are at a distance where online is the only real option.  But this is who I am, I need this, and I hope to find it again.

6/23/2016 11:24:24 AM
I hate to do it, but I might have to take things into my own hand.  It's been many months of my self-imposed chastity.  I am on such a sexual edge that I can't get any work done.  It's been getting really bad for the last month or two.  I really don't believe that I should orgasm unless it is at the direction and for the pleasure of a dominant woman.  But I have to do something so I can get some work done.  There is a lot to do, I am behind, and am feeling the stress from that as well as my prolonged denial.

6/16/2016 10:21:19 AM
I have exchanged a couple of emails with my old friend.  It was so good to hear from her.  I really miss her, but she is content and has moved on.  I am very happy for her.  Be well, my dear friend.

5/23/2016 11:06:35 AM
I miss my old friend who used to love to watch me edge for her on Skype.  It was so satisfying to perform for her and please her in this way.  I hope life is good, my dear friend.

5/22/2016 3:40:00 PM
Watching sounding videos and dreaming.

5/16/2016 7:16:13 AM
A nice morning erection today.  The only thing missing is a woman to stroke to the edge for her to enjoy.

4/24/2016 1:44:24 PM
I so wish I had a woman who would like me to edge for her.  I am in self-imposed chastity, but it becomes so much more meaningful to edge for a woman.  No release, just the sweet suffering for her to enjoy.

3/2/2016 9:36:23 AM
It's been a long time since I have had the strap-on.  I really miss it.  I am a sub male who wants and needs and loves to look up to see and feel a dominant woman taking me for her pleasure.

2/27/2016 4:33:24 PM
I have been looking at femdom art on Tumblr today.  I have always loved femdom art.  There are good collections on multiple sites on Tumblr.  I love it.  Certainly takes me to the place in my mind that I would like to go in reality.  Lovely

2/20/2016 8:07:32 AM
It's difficult to not have a dominant woman to edge for and to dedicate my chastity to.

1/31/2016 12:03:38 PM
Are there any local women who have a pair of panties they are ready to discard?  I haven't had any lingerie in quite some time and would love to have a pair of panties.

12/26/2015 10:18:05 AM
We all have our own unique desires and drives.  But I think most women like oral service.  I would so love to provide frequent and complete oral service for a dominant woman's pleasure and at her command and direction.
 
I need chastity and orgasm control.  Of course I am in self-imposed chastity, but it would be so much more meaningful if it were for a woman to enjoy and enforce.  To have someone checking in to make sure I hadn't emptied my balls and relieved the pressure in my prostate.  To edge for her pleasure, but not be allowed to cum.  Of course, an orgasm wouldn't be allowed very often, but on occasion it would be good to be allowed to cum, always at a time chosen by my Mistress and with her controlling the pace and circumstances of my orgasm, performed for her and for her pleasure.  I think it might be better for my physical health to orgasm from time to time too, but whatever pleasure I would feel would be in obeying her and performing according to her directions and instruction and for her pleasure and satisfaction in knowing that I adore belonging to her, pleasing her, and being controlled by her.


12/18/2015 11:23:10 AM
I certainly miss having someone to edge for.

12/9/2015 12:35:20 PM
I haven't written in quite some time.  I continue to hope for a dominant woman, near or far, who will want to own me and control me for her pleasure.  I have been in self-imposed chastity for a long time.  Can't remember the last time I had an orgasm, probably more than a year ago.  It doesn't seem right to me to cum without permission and instruction to do so, and for the pleasure of a dominant woman.  To masturbate on my own just for the physical release is really not very satisfying.  Though I do sometimes wonder whether it would be better for my physical health, not emotional, to cum from time to time.  It wouldn't very emotionally satisfying, but I don't know if it would physically healthier for me.  I would much rather wait for a woman to control and enjoy my orgasms.

6/11/2015 1:17:02 PM
Ah...queening, edging, CBT, chastity, CFnm, foot worship, orgasm control, watersports, silky panties and lingerie, sounding, anal penetration and prostate massage, genital bondage, the scent and taste of a dominant woman.  How I love being a submissive male.

5/5/2015 6:54:04 PM
Watching sounding videos.  I love it.  I hope for it.  I need it.

3/20/2015 9:25:26 AM
Thinking of sounding myself.  I haven't done it in a long time and I have never had a woman do it to me.  It just seems like such a deep act of submission.  I would love to have a dominant woman take me in this intimate way. 

3/15/2015 9:24:46 AM
CBT is very important to me.  To offer my genitals to a woman to use as she pleases.  To feel her control of me in this intimate way.  Feeling her pull and squeeze my balls, digging her fingernails into my balls and cock as she speaks softly to me, teaching me and instructing me to to be able to submit more and more deeply to her.  Giving her control of this most vulnerable part of my body.  I can't take as much as you see in some videos, but it is such a powerful and profound demonstration of her dominance over me and my submission to her.

2/18/2015 10:11:51 AM
I love to edge, such sweet agony.  It is such a powerful symbol of the need I have for feminine control of my orgasms.  I hope to find a dominant woman someday who will want me to edge for her as a demonstration of my submission to her.

2/11/2015 7:11:51 AM
Out of town in a hotel again for work.  An intense and prolonged morning erection.  Deep thoughts of my submissiveness and desire to kneel to serve and please my Mistress.

1/18/2015 9:17:16 AM
What the truly submissive male most wants is to be vulnerable and completely open in every way to his Mistress.  In the process of being fully vulnerable to her, what might have been humiliating becomes honored.  He is protected by her as he submits to her.  He wants to kneel naked before her and to kiss her feet and to be loved for it.

1/17/2015 4:12:48 PM
I think orgasm control and denial are such important things to offer your Mistress.  To have her control your orgasms is a central part of submission to her.  Such an intimate symbol of male submission to female authority.

12/21/2014 9:40:36 AM
Thinking some more about CBT.  It just seems so important in the D/s dynamic.  The male genitals are exposed and so sensitive.  I think it is important for the sub male to offer them to the dominant woman.  Trusting her.  Knowing she will hurt them to show her dominance and because she enjoys it, but also knowing that she will not damage them and that in his submission to her he knows that she will protect him from harm.  An important physical and symbolic demonstration of his submission to her and her dominance over him, ownership, control, and protection.


12/20/2014 9:29:29 AM
I was thinking of smelling your panties this morning and then I rolled onto my back.  I immediately thought of you queening me.  How I would love that, Mistress.  To feel you covering me.  Your sweet pussy over my face and mouth and to be licking up inside you and stroking your clitoris with my tongue and sucking it into my mouth until you reach your release and flood my face with your sweet sexual liquid.  And I drink from you and when you roll off me, I gently clean you with my tongue.

12/3/2014 5:45:57 PM
And when I am restrained and exposed in this way and you are sitting comfortably behind me, you could combine massage of my prostate with milking of my urethra in the underside of my cock hanging between my legs.  Further milking the precum from my cock.  I think of you using the fingers of one hand in my ass to milk my prostate and the thumb of the other hand to milk my urethra.


12/3/2014 8:08:57 AM
Fully erect in bed this morning, Mistress.  I held my cock and thought of you putting me on a milking bench.  I  thought of it as being on all fours but with a bench under my chest and abdomen.  Wrists and legs bound to keep me in position.  My cock and balls and ass all exposed and accessible from behind.  My cock and balls hanging down, balls in position for you to either grasp them around the base or putting them in a humbler to control me.  Then spreading my ass, lubing me up, then pressing your finger inside me.  All the way in, and stroking in and out.  Then finding my prostate and beginning the pressure and massage of milking me.  When my prostate is massaged there is an indescribable feeling that extends all the way out to the head of my cock.  Then I can feel my prostatic secretions begin to flow out into the shaft of my cock, to the head, and then dripping from my cock.  I love to think of you taking me in this way, Mistress.  Under your control.

11/29/2014 2:15:36 PM
I am thinking of a woman's fingernails gripping my naked balls.

11/28/2014 10:54:55 AM
Spent more time this morning trimming my pubic hair.  It a little difficult to see and reach the hair on the underside of my balls.  Don't want to cut my scrotum with the scissors.  But i do like to see and feel my genitals more exposed and accessible.  

11/26/2014 6:49:32 AM
An intense morning erection today.  Thinking so strongly of your scent and having you coat my balls with your sweet feminine sexual liquid, to mark me as yours.

9/28/2014 3:33:55 PM
Queening

I love queening.  It is such an intimate and magical connection between a dominant woman and her submissive male.  In its positions, so satisfyingly symbolic of my submission to her.  I love to lie on my back and see her lowering herself over my face.  As she approaches, her most private place opens to accept me and take me inside.  If she faces my face, I love to look up into her eyes as she allows me to pleasure her.  If she faces my feet, my nose is embedded in the cleft of her bottom.  In either position, she moves to have my mouth and tongue where she wants them.  Licking her delicate inner lips.  Licking up inside her.  Stroking her clit with my tongue.  As her clit swells and emerges from its hood, taking it in my mouth to suck gently, swirling her clit head with my tongue.  She moves to position my mouth at her bottom hole.  I kiss her hole and circle her hole with my tongue.  She presses down and I push my tongue up inside her bottom.  Her pussy getting wetter and wetter as I service her.  As she moves, she anoints my face with her sweet feminine sexual liquid.  Then she reaches the first of her rolling orgasms and I lick her and drink from her as she cums on my face and in my mouth.  I gently clean her with my tongue, licking the last of her feminine liquid.  Then she rolls off and I cuddle and comfort her in her post-orgasmic rest.  Gently stroking her hair and kissing her as I hold her in my arms.

8/27/2014 9:48:42 AM
I should masturbate so I can concentrate and get some work done.  But I hate to masturbate without permission.  It just doesn't seem right.

8/9/2014 11:14:49 AM
Good morning, Mistress.  In bed this morning, laying face down, I thought of you between my legs, spreading my ass.  Fingering my anus, lubing me, and pressing your finger inside, milking my prostate.  Then of you on top of me, holding me down, pushing your strapon into me, stroking into my ass, and then deeper and harder as you reach your orgasm from fucking me.  Thank you, Mistress.
 

8/9/2014 9:19:16 AM
I thought this morning of bringing you your coffee or tea.  And then of kneeling naked before you, rubbing and kissing your feet, as we plan the activities of the day

8/6/2014 6:50:57 AM
My balls are very full and my prostate is engorged.  I would love to have my prostate milked to relieve some of the pressure.  I do love to feel a woman's finger up inside my boy pussy, massaging my prostate.  I can feel it all the way out at the tip of my cock and then the precum starts to flow.  Kneeling naked and spread wide for you, Miss.

7/30/2014 6:50:17 AM
Oh yes, I love that.  To lie on my back with my legs spread wide and my feet in the air.  To feel you spreading me and taking me.  Looking up at you as you fuck me.  Feeling deep up inside me with your finger and massaging my prostate.  Then mounting me and taking me with your strapon.  Holding your breasts as you fuck me.  Smelling your panties as you fuck me.  Heaven.

7/27/2014 8:19:01 AM
Prolonged and satisfying morning erection today.  Thinking of you.

7/24/2014 6:09:06 PM
I loved standing naked in front of the mirror last night and stroking my cock to full erection.  Then when I couldn’t hold it back any more, I came, spurting my cum for the first time in several months and thinking of my someday Mistress watching me.  Maybe someday she would hold my balls as I masturbate, or wrap her fingers around the base of my balls, pulling them.  My morning erection was very satisfying this morning.  Waking to feel the fullness between my legs and thinking of my Mistress.  Last night after orgasm, I wanted to lay with my head in her lap, naked, inhaling her scent, feeling her hands on me, and stroking my hair.  This morning, I would like to bathe her, dry her off, brush her hair, massage her.  Then to suckle her nipples and lick her pussy and bottom.  I am erect again.

7/8/2014 10:48:47 PM
It is so wonderfully reaffirming and comforting to have made connections over time with wonderful ladies, who I will probably never meet, but who respect me, care for me, have a sense of perspective, and are normal sensible people at all times with and for me.  Thank you.

7/8/2014 10:27:41 PM
Some days are just harder than others.

5/14/2014 9:22:20 AM

I'm at work and today I have my balls bound with rope under my clothes.  Nice to feel the pressure and control.  And to know that only you, dear reader, know that I am bound.  I love my submissiveness.


2/14/2014 7:02:13 PM

Watching a sounding video.  She has the sound deep into his urethra, then holds a vibrating egg against the sound.  I can only image how that must feel against his prostate, considering how wonderful a finger against my prostate, milking me, feels.


2/11/2014 10:20:03 PM

It is certainly true that the mind is the primary sex organ.


2/11/2014 7:57:19 PM

Thinking of how I love queening.  Providing such an intimate service in such a subservient way.  A loving relationship as it should be.


2/11/2014 7:06:36 PM

Thinking of the feeling of a large-headed vibrator pressed firmly against the place behind my balls and in front of my anus as I stand, legs apart, immobilized.


2/2/2014 8:40:31 AM

Such wonderful thoughts and images pass through my mind when I am having a prolonged and intense morning erection.


1/20/2014 9:17:24 AM
Good morning, Mistress.
 
Thinking so strongly of standing before you and undressing.  Then of binding my cock and balls tightly with rope.  And then, kneeling and smelling your panties as you watch me.
 

1/7/2014 7:50:36 PM

It has been quite some time since I have been fucked.  But I miss it so much.  Laying on my back, legs in the air, feeling your strap-on probing my anus.  And then sliding inside me.  Feeling you on top of me.  Kissing you.  Holding your breasts.  Hearing your breathing and moans as you fuck me and your strapon presses against your clit.  Hearing you cum as you fuck me.


1/1/2014 9:41:29 AM

Kneeling on the knee supports of the milking bench.  Bent at the waist onto the bench, legs apart.  Cock and balls hanging down in the opening of the bench.  Feeling you grasp me firmly around the base of my balls, pulling them, controlling me.  Then the slippery lube on my ass and your fingers deep up inside me to begin the milking.


12/22/2013 9:10:50 AM

Would love to be with you, Mistress, as you lay back warm and totally relaxed.  And then to caress and lick you from head to toe.  Every inch of you.  Servicing all your openings and drinking from you as you release.


11/17/2013 1:07:00 PM

I would love to have you take me by the balls and pull me to you, rubbing my balls on your pussy, to mark me with your scent.


10/28/2013 9:20:38 AM

I would love to know a woman who wants to induce lactation.  Would love to suckle you and drink from your breasts.


10/25/2013 4:53:18 PM

Providing oral service, front and back.  Heaven.


10/24/2013 11:25:43 PM

My balls are very full and aching.  I haven't cum in weeks.  But I firmly believe that I shouldn't have release without permission.


10/17/2013 12:38:57 PM

Wow!  "Collarme Support" just removed all the femdom illustrations and drawings that I had in my photo section.  For those of you who recognize that they are gone, I didn't do it.  Sorry.


10/4/2013 9:38:01 PM

Would love to feel a woman's nipple pushed deep up in my urethra.


8/23/2013 8:42:03 AM

Oh yes, Mistress.  Would love to slide between your legs in the morning to gently caress your pussy with my tongue.  Inhaling your scent and drinking your feminine liquid from your delicate inner lips.



8/16/2013 8:58:39 AM

From time to time, I think I would benefit from a deep prostate massage and thorough milking.


8/16/2013 8:55:55 AM

I live mostly in self-imposed chastity.  I believe the male orgasm should be controlled by a dominant woman.  I am very full.  Balls are aching.  For you.


8/15/2013 8:15:53 AM

Love the feel of my morning erection and thoughts of you.


7/28/2013 2:25:51 PM

I do love to kiss and lick a dominant woman's bottom.  Caressing her bottom hole with my tongue.  Gently pressing my tongue up inside her.


7/26/2013 6:54:59 AM

 

Very hard this morning, Mistress.  Thinking of you showing me off to one of your friends.  Undressing for you.  Edging for you.  Kneeling between your legs to lick you until your sweet feminine nectar flows into my mouth.

 


6/21/2013 6:44:58 PM

As a submissive male, nothing is more satisfying to me than to bring pleasure to a dominant woman.


6/21/2013 6:38:33 PM

I can't take this much, but it excites me.

 

http://www.bdsmstreak.com/video/11843/balls-kicked-hard


5/18/2013 4:04:30 PM

Dreaming

 

http://www.pornhub.com/view_video.?viewkey=315846761


4/28/2013 10:37:32 PM

http://xhamster.com/movies/1070378/van_buren_32fr_sound_to_ribbed_sound._jamming.html


4/28/2013 10:15:03 PM

Sounding.

 http://xhamster.com/movies/1044481/sounding_with_a_beaded_wire_sound._urethral_insertion.html


4/23/2013 7:04:38 PM

Thinking of being sounded.  Have thought of it for years, and have tried it on myself.  I was afraid of it, but it was wonderful.  To have a woman take me in this way, sounding my urethra, can't even describe it ...  Would love to know a woman who desires this.  Perhaps a physician or nurse, skilled in sterile technique, who wants to take me in hand and penetrate me and own me in this most intimate way.


4/7/2013 9:26:29 AM

Being a submissive like me is very much like being a pet, an adoring puppy dog.  Kneeling at your feet, just waiting for you.  Happily responding to your touch or command.  Happy just to be with you.  Always alert to you.  Catching your scent.  Nuzzling you.  Drawn to your scent and the taste of you.  Humping your leg.  Always eager to please.


4/6/2013 9:21:24 AM

Thank you so much for allowing me to edge for you, Mistress.  It was so wonderful to stand naked before the full length mirror and bring myself to the edge for you.  I thought of you sitting and watching me.  Talking softly to me.  Maybe reaching out to pull my balls from time to time.  As I submit to you, becoming more and more yours.  The head of my cock so swollen and sensitive.  The pre cum surging out into the shaft of my cock.  Looking so lovingly into your eyes.  Wanting so much to please you.  And then when you are ready, kneeling between your legs to pleasure you with my tongue in all the special ways that you love.


4/4/2013 11:41:33 AM

Out of town for work.  In my hotel room.  Prostate engorged, balls very full.  I undressed and stood naked in front of the full length mirror.  I edged and thought of you watching me, and of kneeling to hump your leg as you look down at me.  Wanting to be your good pet.


3/29/2013 8:48:11 AM

Just thinking of how I love queening.  Of course I love providing oral service, the scent and taste of a woman.  And bringing her pleasure.  But with queening there is the added element of the control and submission.  Delicious.


2/24/2013 5:39:49 PM

Stroking to the edge of cumming, but not allowing myself to orgasm.  I do love orgasm control.


9/9/2012 8:53:29 AM

In a hotel room watching urethral sounding videos.  Ummmm.  I gotta get home to my knitting needles.


9/9/2012 6:25:25 AM

Watching femdom videos.  I certainly can't take what some of these subs can tolerate, but I do love to see women controlling men.  Women in the dominant position.  Men kneeling before them in submission.  So natural and right.


9/3/2012 9:13:46 AM

I would so love to kneel this morning to rub and kiss your feet and to lick your pussy and bottom.


6/26/2012 11:17:44 PM

The service I would love to provide.

http://motherless.com/GAD66F17/1240257


6/16/2012 10:13:59 AM

Thinking of seeing and feeling and tasting your golden shower before I bathe you this morning.  Then to worship your feet and lick you to multiple orgasms.


6/14/2012 1:07:58 PM

I need and want orgasm control.  To feel this intimate bondage and subservience to the will and power of a woman.  And for purposes of physical health, perhaps merely a prostate milking from time to time.


6/7/2012 8:19:52 PM

I want and need to be fucked.  I watch online videos of women being fucked hard by men, and I can totally relate to the way they feel.  Not that I want a man, but I do want to be on my back, with my legs up, feet in the air, and feeling a woman stroke her strapon into me.  Deep, insistent, and I stroke her hair and face and breasts as she fucks me.  Hearing her breathing and her voice and her energy and power as she fucks me and cums.  And she collapses on me and I hold her and kiss her and feel her cock slowly pulsing in me as she enjoys the remnants of her orgasm, and gains strength to fuck me again and cum in me again.


5/29/2012 10:11:21 AM

I would love to wear your panties today, under my clothes to work.  After you had taken me by the balls and rubbed them between your legs to mark me with your scent.  Thank you so much, Mistress.  Kneeling to kiss your pretty toes.


5/27/2012 11:06:50 AM

I would love to lick your ass.  I do love providing anal tongue service.


5/23/2012 7:00:26 PM

To put it plainly, I could use a good ass fucking.


4/28/2012 6:08:07 PM

I think I have said this before, but I really appreciate being in the presence of the genuine dominant women here.  It is so good to be myself and to be able to say openly that I am a submissive male and to be accepted and appreciated for it.  Thank you, Ladies.  


4/25/2012 8:59:10 PM

I have just been thinking how much I value mutual affection in a domme/sub relationship.  I want both of us to genuinely like and value the other as people as well as Domme and sub.  And to feel real affection for the other.  I have known Dommes who didn't even seem to like me though they wanted to use me.  That is not of interest to me.  I want to like my Domme and to feel her affection for me as well.  I want to submit and give myself to a woman who likes me as a person.


4/22/2012 10:09:11 AM

I think about entering your bedroom and undressing for you.  Standing naked before you as you examine me.  Then lying on your bed with my legs spread and your hands on my nipples and stroking my cock.  Then the soles of my feet together as you spank my balls.  And burying my face in your neck as you hurt and stroke me.  And after keeping me on the edge for so long you finally allow me to release for you and the world is good.


4/16/2012 9:54:22 PM

I was just touching my nipples and they are so sensitive.  Women's nipples are probably more sensitive since they are more fully developed.  But mine are very sensitive as well and I know when a woman takes them in her fingers or mouth, it is HIGHLY stimulating.


4/13/2012 8:11:24 AM

It would be nice to stand naked before you this morning for inspection and examination before I check out of my hotel and get going.  It would be nice to feel you grasp me around the base of my balls and rub them between your legs, to mark me with your scent for the day.  And to wear your panties beneath my clothes.  Kneeling to kiss your toes ...


4/2/2012 8:03:22 PM

This is a beautiful video and a service that I would love to provide for the Lady who would take me as hers.

http://motherless.com/GB0A2017/2596AA9


4/1/2012 9:37:27 AM

I love that I am a submissive male.  It is so wonderful to be able to give myself to a woman for her pleasure and to serve her.  I can't imagine finding so much satisfaction in any other way.  I suppose I would be just as happy if I were different as long as I was being true to myself.  But I am submissive and am so thankful that I am.  Of course, it is frustrating to not be kneeling in service, but even with that difficult reality, I still love the knowledge that I am submissive.


3/26/2012 1:15:15 PM

A woman I keep in touch with posted some new pictures of her legs.  Gorgeous.  I do love legs and feet and love to caress and kiss them.  Ooooo la la


3/24/2012 11:13:20 AM

It's hard to describe how much I love queening.  I love to see her above me, straddling my head, then smiling as she lowers herself over my face.  It is a position that allows her to get my open mouth and tongue just where she wants them.  And as her excitement rises, her feminine juices begin to flow and I eagerly lick them and drink from her pussy.  When she cums and her hips move, I keep my mouth and tongue in place to continue her stimulation without interruption.  So completely satisfying to serve her in this way.


3/5/2012 11:52:16 PM

Watching videos of ball busting tonight.  So exciting.  I do love CBT, though I certainly can't take as much as they do in the movies.  Still, I do love CBT.


2/28/2012 12:50:50 PM

As much as I love BDSM activities, I also love closeness and warmth and tenderness and affection.  But even in this setting, I definitely respond to a dominant woman.  I love to feel her control of me as she leads me in snuggling, caressing, and love-making.  I am definitely the submissive partner, but will also rise to meet her and join her and show her the depth of my affection for her.  When I feel her acceptance and desire, I melt and want to feel her arms around me, her soft lips seeking mine, and her warm hands leading and guiding us in our caresses.


2/27/2012 10:16:32 PM

A very pretty lactation/nursing video.

http://xhamster.com/movies/872691/kelly_hart_wet_nurse.html?embed=related


2/27/2012 10:16:20 PM

2/25/2012 9:33:31 AM

In the morning, I stand naked before her.  She grasps me firmly around the base of my balls, to position and control me.  Then she spanks my morning erection.  When she is satisfied, she allows me to kneel to kiss her feet, to lick along her insteps and between her toes, and to suck each of her toes into my mouth to massage them with my tongue.


2/17/2012 6:00:27 AM

I am 65, well-educated, fully employed, respectful, considerate, imaginative, and submissive.  I have known of my submissiveness for many years.  At first I didn't accept it and thought there was something wrong with me, but I have long since come to embrace my submissiveness and wouldn't change it if I could.  I love being with a dominant woman, to learn her wishes and desires and to serve her for her pleasure.

I would love a relationship of affection and mutual appreciation, but one that is female led and where she is clearly the dominant partner, with respect for me as her submissive.  There are many activities that I love in this arena, but mostly it is to find the intimate connection between Domme and sub that leads to satisfaction for them both.  (And loads of fun and smiles and pleasure.)

 


2/16/2012 5:40:43 AM

I have been awake for awhile on this early Thursday morning.  The heat isn't on yet and it's cold.  My morning erection was so insistent it woke me up.  Would love to be under these warm covers serving a dominant lady.


1/24/2012 8:33:31 PM

I was informed by a woman a couple of days ago that my journal was all about how full my balls are.  I guess the last few entries are about that (though if you go back through the entire journal, that is not the most consistent theme).  But recently, I guess that has been true.  I have been practicing self-chastity.  Not cumming.  But as I spend time here among the profiles of so many dominant women, I feel my submissiveness very powerfully, and there is a strong sexual component to that.  So, I seem to be conscious of the aching.  It is also true that a journal is not a conversation, so there isn't anybody else to respond to as in intense essential communication.  In any case, since I think women don't want to hear about my thoughts of myself, I will try to do better with my journal entries.  What is also true is that I am sincerely submissive and love would to kneel to please and serve and learn from a dominant woman.


1/10/2012 7:47:08 AM

I woke at 3:30 am with an erection, and I thought of standing naked before a dominant woman and stroking to the edge for her.  My erection finally subsided and I went back to sleep.  Last night when I went to bed I found I had to keep my legs apart because of the fullness in my balls.  I long for the opportunity to edge for a woman who would appreciate and enjoy seeing me endure that for her.

 


1/6/2012 8:30:15 AM

I used to know a woman who would have me strip and hump the arm of the sofa or her leg as she sat and watched me, sometimes petting my head as I humped and she could see and feel my engorged cock and balls between my legs.


1/4/2012 8:12:25 PM

I came home to get on cam for a woman who wanted to inspect me.  She asked some questions about my circumstances, my need for control, and my past experiences.  She told me some of the things she would expect from me.  Then had me stand and remove my shirt and tie.  In a short while, I was instructed to remove my pants, then my underwear.  She continued to chat with me and instruct me about her expectations as I stood naked before her.  She asked to see my penis up closer on the webcam.  Then she had me start stroking my penis for her, until I was hard and could feel myself on the edge.  When I am in that state, I feel my submissiveness, powerfully and deeply.  It is so satisfying and natural and right to stand naked before a woman, at the edge of but denied ejaculation.  For her pleasure, exposed to her, open and accessible to her.  Even now as I write this I can feel the sensation of submission and how much I want it and need it.  How natural it is.  How right it is.


1/3/2012 8:53:10 AM

My balls are full and my prostate is swollen and aching.  I could use a thorough prostate milking.


12/17/2011 10:19:47 AM
I went to the bathroom on another floor, where it is quieter.  I stood in the stall with my pants and underwear down at my ankles and lifted my shirt and tie so you could see me well.  I thought of you sitting and watching me and stroked until I was hard and my cock was standing straight out from my body.  I stroked until I could feel the cum surging out in the shaft of my cock, even out to the head.  I kept myself right on that edge for about five minutes, until my legs were shaking and I would have to bend to brace myself with my hands on my knees from time to time.  It was hard not to cum.  My balls are so full and my prostate is so engorged.  My cock is still semi-hard, extending down my right pant leg.  I can feel the precum dripping down my leg.  Thank you, Mistress, for allowing me to edge for you.  I long to edge while you watch me.

 


12/11/2011 3:40:28 PM

In the mornings, I think of gently bathing you and then of kneeling between your legs to pleasure you as you drink your coffee.


10/10/2011 6:32:35 PM

Since I don't have anyone to control my orgasms and to look out for my sexual health, I am wondering if I should start to masturbate from time to time on some regular schedule.  I tend to deny myself since I don't really find it satisfying to release without the specific instruction and permission of a dominant woman.  So, I end up going many weeks or sometimes months at a time between orgasms.  On the other hand, I'm not sure that is actually good for the physical health of my sexual organs.  Whenever I think of self-induced sexual release, I tend to put it off thinking that maybe a woman is right around the corner who might like to control my sexual expression.  Just some thoughts.  I don't think it would be all that satisfying to cum on my own, but it might be physically healthier and I don't have an interest in poor health.  If I ever do find a woman who would like to take charge of my sexual release, I would like to be in good health for her.


10/7/2011 9:38:41 AM

Taking a little time off today, home on the couch.  Thinking of milk and milking.

I have been thinking a lot lately about suckling a dominant woman's breasts and of helping her to induce lactation.  It would be so comforting to lay with my head in her lap, nursing, and to drink her warm milk.  Such a deep and intimate bonding, with affection and devotion.

I also think of being milked.  I love orgasm control and can feel the fullness in my balls and engorgement in my prostate.  It would healthy, I think, to have my prostate milked regularly.  But milking by prostate massage would still allow continued orgasm control.  A nice combination and so wonderful to open myself to my lady for penetration and milking.


9/13/2011 1:40:40 PM

As always, I think of kneeling naked between your legs after your shower, to gently take you in my mouth and pleasure you.  Then hoping you will take me by the balls, wrapping your hand around the base of my balls, pulling me to you, and rubbing my balls between your legs to mark me with your scent for the day.


8/20/2011 9:50:46 AM

Thinking this morning of kneeling before my Mistress and licking her until she is satisfied.  Then of having her rub her wet pussy on my balls to mark me with her scent and of wearing her panties for the day.  I kneel to kiss her toes in gratitude.


8/10/2011 10:06:46 PM

My balls are very full.  It has been quite some time since I have had release.  I live alone and am not owned, so I could masturbate, but it just doesn't seem right to cum without permission and direction.  It would probably be better for my prostate and sexual health, but it is not all that satisfying to cum without specific instruction from a woman.  Much better would be to stand before a woman to release in her presence or to have a woman milk my prostate, to relieve the pressure but without cumming.  And of course, it would be wonderful to feel her finger up inside me.  I do love anal penetration, so intimate and such a nice demonstration of my submission to a dominant woman.  I see my engorgement has me rambling, so I should sign off, but I will think in bed tonight of serving a woman and hope to have permission to empty myself one of these days.


7/24/2011 9:40:06 AM

In the morning when I awaken, I love to think of rising and going with you to the bathroom.  There I would assist you with your shower or bath.  Washing your back, your legs and feet, your intimate parts.  Washing and rinsing your hair.  Then, I would dry you and brush your hair.  When you instruct me to, I would kneel between your legs to pleasure you with my mouth and tongue, bringing you to climax and drinking from you and cleaning you with my tongue afterward.  Then I think of you having me lay on my back.  You straddle me, grasp me firmly around the base of my balls, and pull them up to rub them against your swollen lips, anointing me with your intimate scent.  I love to think of being marked in this way and of wearing your scent through the day.  Any other woman who came near me would know that I am marked with your fluid, the mark of your ownership.


2/13/2011 4:00:40 PM

It's been a long time, but I remember well and miss waking with you and curling up around you with my arms around you.  Then very lightly stroking your neck and shoulders with just my fingertips, the way you liked me to wake you.  Caressing your back and arms and thighs and breasts.  The way you would stretch when I would caress your armpits.  The way your nipples responded to my touch.  Then the way you would move your hips and send me down between your legs to pleasure you with my mouth and tongue.  After you would cum in my mouth you would have me move around to your bottom to lick your bottom hole, which I loved to do and which you also loved.  You would let me lick you and push my tongue up into you for hours.  You would have me swing around so you could reach my cock and balls, and as I licked your ass you would squeeze my balls and dig your nails into my cock.  Later you would go to the bathroom to pee.  I would kneel before you and when you were through, you would stand so I could clean you with my tongue.  I miss you.


12/23/2010 11:04:17 AM
I am at work (typing on my iPod for privacy). I have just come back from edging in the bathroom. I am so grateful for the dominant women in the world. Especially those I have chatted with, met in person, and served over the years. I appreciate the opportunity I have to be myself with you and to be able to openly acknowledge my submissiveness to you. I appreciate being respected, liked, and valued for my submissiveness. I love to feel the affection a dominant woman has for me as I kneel before her to serve and please her. And I love the bond of intimacy and devotion that can form between a dominant woman and her submissive male. I wish all of you happy holidays and a healthy, satisfying, and rewarding new year. Kneeling humbly, jim

12/10/2010 9:01:28 AM
A couple of days ago, I had to come home for awhile in the middle of the day. ?While here, I took time to undress and bind my genitals. ?I tied them in standard ways, but also pulled each of my balls out and tied them separately, with rope around the base of each to pull them away from my body and separate them from each other. ?Don't know why I haven't done that before, but this was the first time. ?Previously, I have either tied them off together with rope wound around and around the base to pull my balls out as with a stretcher. ?Or I have tied them in a criss-cross pattern including my cock, which does separate them somewhat. ?But this was the first time I have actually tied each of my balls separately. ?I liked the way it felt and looked. ?It won't be the last time. ?They feel even more full than usual today.

12/3/2010 5:31:51 AM
5:30 am.  Can't sleep tonight, despite the fact that I am very tired.  Have been awake since 3 am.  I miss serving a woman.  The need to serve and please is strong.  My sexual fluids are also pretty congested.  I can feel it in my balls and prostate.  I very seldom masturbate.  I don't really like to cum without a woman's permission or preferably at her command and in her presence or at least for her to enjoy witnessing.  Sort of self-induced chastity.  It has been many weeks, probably a few months since my last release.  So, I will imagine a woman enjoying the discomfort I feel from the pressure in my genitals.  Back to bed and maybe a bit of sleep before getting up again for work.  Kneeling humbly to kiss your toes.

12/1/2010 10:29:07 PM
I have to travel quite a bit for work.  When I am sitting in a hotel room, away from home, my mind wanders.  I think of kissing a woman's pretty feet, and licking along her instep, and sucking her toes, and seeing her lower herself over me to sit on my face for servicing, and feeling her warm pee on my body.

11/20/2010 10:47:27 AM

Saturday morning.  For some reason, I love to kneel to serve in the morning.  I am fresh and alert and eager and feeling my submissiveness deeply.  It is wonderful to welcome a dominant woman to the day with service as she likes it, still warm from sleep.


10/28/2010 3:38:24 PM

I am out of town for work.  I have finished for the day but have to wait for a flight.  Fortunately, I am able to get on line in the office where I was visiting.  Gives me free time to think about my submissiveness and how glad I am to be submissive.  I think vanilla men also appreciate the strength of women and their caring and considerateness.  But as a submissive male, I see a special side of the strength of women.  And I am allowed to see their caring and considerateness as it is expressed much more powerfully to a submissive male kneeling before them.  If a male is willing to see the benefit of submission, he is able to appreciate the full spectrum of female strength.  He will benefit from her training and instruction.  He will learn better how to please her.  And she in turn will turn her considerable strength and attention to his development.  The same activities that he may fantasize about as a vanilla man he will see in a completely different light.  The satisfaction he will get from pleasing and serving her will be many fold the mere vanilla satisfaction he would have had.  But he will also learn new ways to serve her and to demonstrate his devotion to her.  He will learn to sacrifice for her, to always put her first.  He will learn self-denial and attention to her needs and requirements.  Vanilla men have no idea of the real needs and requirements that women have, because they are unwilling to see or unaware of the depth of the woman they are with.  The dominant woman is more aware of these things than the vanilla woman and as such the rewards are greater when in service to her.  The real satisfaction of submission is feeling the full light of attention and caring and enveloping warmth that the dominant woman turns on a man when he kneels in true submission before her.


10/15/2010 5:11:09 PM

I do love to edge for a woman, when she instructs me to do it for her. Especially, of course, when she can watch me perform and suffer the sweet agony for her. But also, for example, being told to go to the bathroom at work and to edge for her there, reporting back when I return to my office. Legs still shaking, precum running down my leg.


9/15/2010 11:01:54 AM
Feeling my submissivemess very intensely these days. I love being submissive but certainly would like to be openly expressing it to a woman. I realize I must be patient and I do try to be. I am feeling increasing pressure and fullness making it hard to concentrate. I only wish I could be enduring this discomfort for the pleasure of a dominant woman. OK, I am through feeling sorry for myself now. Back to work.

5/21/2010 5:44:00 AM
I am up early, unable to sleep though I need the rest for another busy work day. My mind whirls with the energy of my submissiveness. Interesting how powerful is the need to kneel before a woman, to give myself to her, to serve and please her. So much power in the desire to give up control, to be a vessel to be filled with her.

4/22/2010 6:59:15 PM
Wonderful thing about my submissiveness, it completes me. When I have the opportunity to kneel in submission before a dominant woman, I feel whole. I am out of town as I write this. I walk down the street and not a soul knows that I am a submissive male. If only one woman made eye contact with me and indicated that she knew and appreciated it, I would feel as if I were completely myself.

4/17/2010 3:41:16 PM
I love to wear panties for a woman who appreciates it. I am not a full crossdresser, don't wear full female clothing, definitely can't pass as a woman, and have no desire to try. But I do love the feel of panties, stockings, heels, and lingerie when a woman instructs me to dress for her.

4/10/2010 4:24:59 PM
Flying home on the plane yesterday, I relaxed at the end of long week. The flight wasn't full so we all had a row to ourselves. Across the center aisle and one seat ahead of me sat an attractive woman wearing pants and heels. She was working on her laptop. I was transfixed by her beautiful ankles and classy heels -- simple, black, elegant. She was not wearing stockings and I could see the subtle shape of her ankle, the top of her foot, just the beginning of her instep and toes. So lovely. I wanted to get down on my knees to kiss and worship her feet.

4/9/2010 6:22:28 PM
Sometimes when you pee, you have me kneel before you. Then when you are finished, you stand and have me clean you with my tongue. Thank you so much.

4/4/2010 1:06:20 PM
When I wake in the morning, I think of lightly stroking your shoulders and back. Slowly expanding the area of my caress to your neck and arms and bottom and thighs. Reaching around to gently cup and stroke your breasts. Down to your pussy and along the cleft of your bottom as you shift to allow access. Eventually you tell me to go down and lick you. You move onto your back and open your legs to allow me to lie between them, my mouth and tongue parting your lips and licking you. I lick up inside you and take your clit in my mouth. I love to feel the rhythm of your hips as you push into my mouth. And then finally the taste of your juices as you cum in my mouth and I lick and drink from you. When you have slowed back down, you usually roll onto your side and pull your knees up so I can lick your bottom. Rimming around the edge of your bottom hole and pushing my tongue inside you. I know how much you love that and I love to press my face against you, much like a Namio drawing. Usually, as I am licking you will tell me to shift around so that you can reach my cock and balls. You squeeze my balls and dig your nails into my cock and balls as I continue to lick and pleasure you with my face pressed firmly into the cleft of your bottom. I love this, Mistress, and love pleasing you in this way.

3/4/2010 3:38:09 PM
I have never been in a humbler. But I love the thought of them and the look of them. I do love to feel my balls bound and pulled back between my legs. To be placed in a humbler would seem to provide a perfect combination of vulnerability, accessibility, submission, and immobility before a woman for her pleasure and use. Lovely.

9/14/2009 11:23:17 AM
I am going to try to enter a written piece here. This is a true story. I wrote it after meeting a woman 10+ years ago. It's longer than most journal entries, so I hope it will fit. I called the piece, Well in Hand. A few years ago, I had an experience that, though simple and ultimately unsuccessful in a way, stands out as one of my most memorable. I would like to share it with you as a way of reliving and enjoying it afresh. I am a submissive man, now 51, but at the time, in my late 40s. Like many other submissive men, I must content myself mostly with the hope of finding a woman to serve and from whom to receive the training and control I need. The submissive experience is by far mostly mental as we all know. The physical aspects of my submissiveness are a vehicle for entry into my submissiveness and an expression of my surrender and devotion to a dominant woman, but genuine dominance and submission really takes place in the minds of the woman and man and through the depth of the connection they establish. The experience I would like to relate illustrates, I think, how powerful is the psychological compared with the physical. I had answered the ad of a woman seeking a submissive man. We spoke by phone and seemed to make a nice connection, but she did not follow up with me. Months later, I ran an ad in the personals section of the local vanilla newspaper. I disguised my quest by describing myself as a docile man seeking a strong woman, assuming that those who share my interest would recognize the signal. She called the voice message of the ad and inquired, "Do I read your meaning correctly? Are you submissive?" I recognized her voice and responded. Again we connected nicely by phone. This time she asked me to meet her. The meeting took place at a restaurant near her home. She asked me to wait in the parking lot for her arrival and described her car, a large late model domestic luxury car. She pulled in and I entered the passenger side of her car as she had instructed me previously. Also as instructed, I was wearing black thigh high stockings and black bra with foam breast inserts beneath my street clothes. My black heels were in a bag that remained in my car. We spoke in person for the first time and hit it off as before. She was authoritative but quite personable. After talking for about thirty minutes, she said that she wanted to inspect me more privately at her home. She had me retrieve my heels from my car and lock it. I rejoined her and we drove the short distance to her home. Inside, she gave me a brief tour - kitchen, bedrooms, bathroom with large tub in which she liked to soak and be bathed, office, and sitting room. We settled in the sitting room and she had me prepare and bring her a cold drink. Our conversation centered on the nature of my submissiveness, my experience, and her expectations. After talking for about an hour, she instructed me to remove my clothes - shirt, pants, shoes, socks - and to add the black heels to my ensemble of stockings and bra. She instructed me to walk into the center of the room where she could see me clearly. At her instruction, I turned slowly and returned to position standing facing her. An important aspect of her requirement of her submissives is that their genitals always be exposed and available to her. She had explained this to me previously by phone and the words had become a permanent part of my consciousness. "I will expect you to keep your genitals exposed to me and available to me at all times." Even now, I can hear the sound of her voice and I feel my body relax into the comfort of her protective sphere. After inspecting me from a distance for several minutes in this way, she instructed me to walk to her and to stand just in front of her with my legs spread about shoulder width apart, hands clasped behind my back. I did so and she reached out and took my balls in her left hand. She held my sack and its contents firmly, securely, with pressure but not pain. The feeling of her warm hand holding my balls is a feeling I will never forget. I was figuratively and literally in the palm of her hand. In her touch I felt her power, control, decisiveness, and protection. I realized I was at home, that I was safe, and that I belonged to her. There is nothing I would not have done for her. Anything she would have required of me would have been in my best interest and in fulfilling whatever she commanded I would achieve my greatest satisfaction and significance. With my body and psyche securely in her left hand, she then reached out and took my cock in her right hand. I was hard and, if possible, became more so. She continued to talk to me softly and soothingly as she slowly stroked me. I stood entranced with my eyes closed, legs apart, and hands clasped behind me as securely as if they had been in cuffs. She then had me turn my head from side to side. I have never fully understood this part of the examination, but at some point in the evening she explained that part of what she was doing was to determine my ability to remain erect but not cum. I have speculated that the head-turning was to evaluate whether her control of my cock was complete in the sense that my appropriate response to her hands would continue despite my conscious attention to performing another task. In fact, I still become erect thinking of that night. After examining me in this fashion for what I estimate was half an hour or so, she had me turn facing away from her and get down on my hands and knees. I was instructed to lower my chest to the floor and spread my knees. My ass was widely spread for her and she reached between my legs. As before she grasped my balls firmly with her left hand and took my hard cock in her right hand. She continued stroking and I was hers. I was to continue to turn my head from side to side. The soothing sound of her voice and her warm hands on my genitals took me farther and farther through the opening into the special place I long to be. Where I can proudly declare my submissiveness to women. Where I am recognized and appreciated for the beautiful truths that I know deep inside. Where my purpose is to serve and obey. She continued her examination for about another thirty minutes, all the while talking to me about the things that I know so well and that make my spirit soar. Then she instructed me to rise and re-dress. She took me back to my car and we parted. When we spoke by phone again, she informed me that though she was well-pleased and sorely tempted to use me, she had decided against it. It turned out that she was actually interested in very young men, those just coming of age and only barely aware of and not yet accepting of their submissiveness - young men she could train and in whom she could watch the process of their fight against the inevitable. So, though she was a few years older than me, I was not young enough and was actually too secure in my submissiveness for her needs. I have spoken to her from time to time in the years since and we maintain an affection for one another. I remain hopeful of another meeting. But the real point of my writing today is to share what for me was one of the most powerful experiences I have ever had as a submissive despite the simplicity of the events. Don't get me wrong, I love all the myriad activities that may transpire for me in service of a dominant woman. But the essence of submissiveness is an attitude and a connection between dominant woman and submissive man that is on a subconscious even spiritual level. I felt that connection that night.

7/26/2009 11:47:06 AM
My submissiveness is very active these days. Probably from looking at the profiles of the dominant women here on CM. It stimulates and activates my submissiveness to feel myself in the presence of the dominant women here. It's an interesting paradox -- the power of my submissiveness. The power of the need to kneel in submission. I feel like I could move a mountain to get to a woman who would want me to kneel naked before her to learn, please, and serve.

6/24/2009 10:16:07 AM
CFNM. Clothed Female Naked Male. Even the words give me a tingle. It seems so natural and proper to be naked before a woman. I crave to bare my submissiveness to her and baring my body is both catalytic and emblematic. It opens me up, body and mind, to be exposed to her. I spend so much time in the vanilla world covering up my submissiveness, that it is a relief to be able to acknowledge to a woman that I am submissive and that I am submissive to her. By uncovering my body, I seek to be open to her, submissive before her, accepting of her instruction and training, vulnerable to her. I want her to know the depth of my submission, of my acceptance of her control. I want to be open to her for inspection and examination. I want to lay myself bare before her in service and willingness to learn from her the ways to please her. There are lots of femdom drawings available on the internet and I have quite a collection. Among the most common features of these drawings is the depiction of a naked male before one or more clothed dominant women. This is an extremely powerful image for me. I have only had one opportunity to be displayed by one woman for another woman to see. The woman I was serving from time to time liked to insert an inflatable dildo in me and then would lube my genitals and stroke me to the edge and keep me there, suffering, for as long as she felt I could take it. On one occasion, she had a friend of hers watch. The friend was allowed to touch me. I remember the friend asking, "Is he OK," so intensely did I appear to be suffering. My lady assured her that I was indeed OK. On another occasion, this same lady had me prepare dinner for her and the same friend of hers. I was mostly naked, but initially they had me undress and assume various poses for inspection and examination. Then they had me prance about the room, knees high, like a pony circling in a ring. They seemed to enjoy watching my swaying genitals and continued to examine me afterwards. This was several years ago and I have not had other opportunities for this kind of exposure. Nevertheless, CFNM before more than one woman remains a very powerful image for me, and it is a sure key to opening my submissiveness when I appear before an individual woman.

6/12/2009 12:58:44 PM
I am feeling increasing interest in orgasm control. Not surprising really since I have always enjoyed a woman's sexual release much more than my own. But I am increasingly attracted to the idea of a woman actively controlling and denying my orgasm. I interviewed briefly with a woman from here on CM last September and October. She began training me before we met. She would have me go to the bathroom at work. I was to pull my pants down to my ankles and roll my shirt up to my nipples. Then I was to stand there and masturbate to the very edge of orgasm but I was forbidden to cum. I found this to be intensely engaging. Over time, my balls felt more and more full, hanging heavily between my legs. Likewise, my cock became more and more sensitive. I would stand in the bathroom, nearly naked, with my hard cock standing out before me. I would think of her ordering me to perform like this for her and of her watching me. I would stroke until I could feel the cum in the shaft of my cock. Then I would stop and intermittently stroke to keep myself right on the edge, feeling the agony of the cum in my cock but not being allowed to release. My legs would shake and my nipples were erect as well. After I had kept myself on the edge for several minutes for her, I would return to my office and report to her by email. Sitting there, I would feel the precum dripping from my cock onto and down my leg. Eventually, she interviewed me twice in person. The first time we met in a restaurant. After we had talked in a booth for a few minutes, she had me get up and go to the bathroom to edge for her. She had me repeat edging once or twice more during our restaurant meeting. A few days later, I went to her home. Part of the interview process was to stand naked and edge for her. Later she had me edge while kneeling naked before her. Ultimately, we did not pursue a relationship, but it did start my love of edging on command for the pleasure of a woman. It is sweet agony and seems related to chastity control in that I am not allowed to cum. In some ways it is worse than a chastity device, since I am so close to cumming but prohibited from going over the edge. I find it relates to my need to obey, to endure discomfort for a woman's pleasure, and to voluntarily deny myself at her instruction. It certainly concentrates my mind on my submission and attention to a woman's needs and orders. I do love to perform for her and to please her in this way.

5/22/2009 1:20:20 PM
Spring is finally here in full bloom. And that means that women's feet are coming out of their socks and boots. So great so see women's pretty feet again--in sandals, open toes shoes, strappy heels, even flip flops. I love to see your individual toes, with their polished nails, your rounded instep, rising up to your ankle. So beautiful and it arouses my submissiveness. Makes me want to take your feet in my hands to caress them and kiss them and suck your toes into my mouth. I would like to kiss and lick your instep and the bottoms of your feet. I do love feet in nylons too, but at this time of year it is really wonderful to see women's bare feet again and to feel the powerful urge to kneel in appreciation and service.

5/6/2009 7:49:35 PM
Tonight, I saw this on the journal of a Domme here on CollarMe. It is so true -- a perfect gem of an observation. I wrote to let her know that I was entering it here and noting that I was not the originator. The line is as follows: Nothing makes us more lonely than our secrets....

4/25/2009 10:31:37 AM
I have received some very nice comments about my profile picture. I really appreciate that. i chose the pose carefully. As I am kneeling naked it expresses my submission, openness, and desire to be accessible for service and training. I covered my genitals since I know many women are put off by genital pictures before even meeting a sub. But also to indicate that my submission is more nuanced than genital play and control. I am open to learn from a dominant woman what it is that she needs and desires. My own satisfaction comes from pleasing her.

2/6/2009 7:32:27 AM
I have been thinking how much I love foot worship. This really resonates with me. On the one hand it is nicely symbolic of my submissiveness to kneel to lower myself to a woman's feet. I am literally as well as figuratively at her feet. On the other hand, a woman's feet are enormously erotic to me. Not sure why, but it has always been so. I love to bathe, caress, kiss, and lick them. I love to take a woman's toes into my mouth. I have been naked and kneeling before a woman and then instructed to press my face to her feet, to kiss them, to remove her socks, and to hold her warm feet in my hands as I continue to kiss and lick her feet and then to suck her toes. Wonderful. Heaven.

2/4/2009 8:04:24 AM
Thought I would start to make a few journal entries. Lately, I have been spending quite a bit of time here, browsing dominant women's profiles. It is encouraging to see so many women who feel their dominance and are comfortable with it to the degree that they will post a profile here. I presume that means that there are even more women out there who are dominant, feel dominant, and wish to exercise their dominance, but are not announcing their interests in this semi-public forum. It gives one hope of being able to kneel to serve. Perhaps I will leave it at that for the moment and post this to be sure I am carrying out the process correctly, though I presume it is as straightforward as it seems. In the meantime, good morning and best wishes to all for a productive day, and let us hope for a little joy along the way.

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marriedx
 
 Age: 36
 Manitoba, Canada