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One of the daunting things about acting on ones submissive desires is the possibility that your dominant wont understand your needs. Either hell be too aggressive, and you fear harm at the hands of a stranger, or intentionally or not, just too vanilla, making you feel like youre going through the motions without any sense that your needs are being fulfilled. An experienced Dom knows that it all starts in the mind, and that Ds play is a tool to be used to take the Dom and sub to that place where one partner feels surrendered and the other in control. For some subs, it takes no more than a firm voice and clear direction doing those things that vanilla couples do all the time. For others, getting to that space requires the extreme measures of the lifestyle. For most, its a matter of finding that place in between. Im all about finding that place. That doesnt mean the sub is in control, but for me the goal here is to get my partner into that sub space - that place where she feels surrendered, cherished, owned and cared for. I want to use her desire for the purpose of taking control, and that means recognizing that each person is different and each deserves her own unique approach. I dont have fetishes that I have to act out. My fetish is seizing the submission of another and seeing that devotion in her eyes as she looks up kneeling before me. Im thoughtful, interesting to talk to, have a wide range of interests, easy on the eyes in that gray-at the temples kind of way, and, yes, dominant. Im looking for a sub who will be my partner in crime and give her service to me. Attitude is far more important than appearances, but know that I seek someone who takes good care of herself inside and out.
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