Dominance and Incompetence
It is all too easy to fall into the despicable trap that lies in wait for every non-suspecting dominant personality. Yes, you can be warned about it and you can read about true cases throughout history but, in my case, the lesson was only learned through experiencing it and I swear I will not be repeating this mistake.
There is the famous scenario in Ancient Roman times of Julius Caesar riding in his chariot, a laurel leaf chain around his head, raising his hand to acknowledge and accept the doting applause of his subjects as he rides down the street. A man stands behind Caesar saying repeatedly, “You are not immortal”. A more recent saying is, “Absolute power, corrupts absolutely”.
Anyone in a position of power is in danger of believing their own hype. Every submissive who has ever been dominated by me has sung my praises and during my first year as a domina their verbal fawning was music to my ears; I couldn’t get enough of the adulation.
When you get to the stage of believing that you are as wonderful as people are saying, you are heading for one hell of a mighty fall. Dominant people are mortal and can be as capable of errors, of selfishness and meanness – and be as unthinking, ungrateful and undeserving as anyone else. A dominant is not a paragon of virtue. Yes of course there are some fabulously competent dominant people and, quite frankly, when I meet one I join in with the chorus of universal approval of their skills and aptitude. The problem is that I have come across a far greater percentage of incompetent dominant personalities than I have commendable ones. Whether I have simply been unlucky or maybe I am visiting the wrong establishments, but I don’t really believe either one of those arguments.
When I was in a BDSM environment one evening in London with a woman who was my submissive at the time, we witnessed acts of cruelty; and yet they were perfectly acceptable because the dominant was a sadist and his submissive was masochistic. They complimented each others personalities. There was no problem in my eyes although I wouldn’t have wanted to participate in such events. He was hammering nails through the woman’s breasts and into a plank of wood. I simply moved away to see if I could witness something less sadistic.
What we saw a little later in the evening was a pretty girl who I would guess was less than twenty years old and her HUGE breasts were roped tightly together. Her nipples were clamped and cords led from these clamps to a hook in the wall that was about ten feet up from the ground. The girl was on her toes and the strain was quite plainly hurting her. The guy who had put her into this position was standing at the bar, ignoring the girl as he drank pint after pint of beer. Her cries were loud and pitiful. It took far too long for someone in authority to intervene and as I was about to step forward to try and assist her, a doorman finally put an end to the girl’s suffering by releasing the clamps. I felt guilty for having done nothing. I still do feel guilty. The guilt has remained with me for two years and I don’t suppose it will ever go away.
This was not the error I was referring to in my initial paragraph but my mistake was along the same lines. If only each prospective couple would take the time to get to know the desires and, more importantly, the CAPABILITIES of each other, and yes I do mean both the dominant AND submissive, then just maybe there would be fewer people believing they can do no wrong.
Miss Sarah Davies (26th March 2014)