I have an exercise I've used on people over the years.  Its funny my biggest success story with this was a subs guy who really wasn't sub.  This got him in touch with himself.  And it turns out he was Dominant.

Lesson 2

This can be a little tough to maintain.  Remember if this was real life breaking position would get you disciplined.  

This position is commonly called Nadu.  

Now for the 15 minutes I want you to look at the girl in the mirror.  Notice how she sits, how she squirms as you look at her.  How she Flushes under your gaze.

And then think about how you feel in position as ordered, how you feel to be gazed upon, how you look.

When the timer expires organize your thoughts and then put it down in a 750 word essay.  Really think as you write and be honest to yourself. 

When your done I would have you send it to me so we can discuss how you see yourself vs how i see you. But your not mine so put this in a safe place you'll be reading it later.

Had a request for a few training exercises.  Thought as long as I was writing them up I'd post them here.

 Lesson 1

You need a mirror you can see all of yourself in while your kneeling.

Set a timer for 15 minutes and kneel in front of the mirror.

For those 15 minutes look at the girl in the mirror. How does she look how does she kneel. How is she dressed. How do you feel about the girl in front of you. What do you think of her.

When the timer expires go write a 750 word essay on the experience.

What did you think of the girl before you. What does her clothing say to you. How is her posture.

Normally Id have you send me the essay but your not mine. So put the essay someplace safe, youll be reading it again later

I'm addIng this more so I remember it than anything else.

I'm not used to being afraid. 

Death was never really a deterrent... He'll between the ages of 18 and 25 I was actively trying to get myself killed.  I've walked through Cabrini Green at midnight, stood and taunted a guy shooting at me because he was to drunk to be acurate.  I was on a first name basis with the cops in three counties by the time I was 21.  Just adding that for context.

After my fall I was chained to a hospital bed for months.  The old age home I went to just exuded a miasma of death.  I had nothing to do but watch TV.  I didn't even own a TV at the time. The worst part was not being able to use the bathroom.  

Now I get panic attacks thinking about it.  I'm not worried about being killed but I'm terrified of being a quadriplegic.  I can't read books or watch TV that includes guys in that condition.  Being trapped in jail seems to get to me as well.  Just being unable to move around or take a shower when I need it.

I am not used to this.

If by some miracle you play the Zither please contact me.

Getting my sea legs back under me.  Its slower than I'd like but isn't that always the case.

Saw the Doc again today,

Leg is all healed so now its just a matter of increasing what I am doing.  

Took all the time to write this so I thought I'd save it here.  

Two explorer's are deep in Africa when they are captured by head hunters.  The head hunters bind them each to a pole and carry them for 3 days over hills across a river and through the forest where they finally come to the village.

At the village they are untied and thrown into a cage.  That night the villagers throw a massive party where they feast drink alcohol and dance.  

At the height of the festivities the Chief calls for silence and approaches the cage.  Our two explorers see this huge guy standing about 6' 8" tall approach them and they begin to quake.

The Chief points at our first explorer with his big hammock like hands and yells in this deep voice that carries to all ends of the village.

"You! Death or RooRoo?

The first explorer squeaks out " I don't want to die, I'll take RooRoo!"

The Chief turns back to the village and yells "ROOROO!!!"

The tribe goes insane with cheering dancing and drinking and our explorer is pulled from the cage stripped and thrown face down over a log and every man in the village jumps his bones.

The Chief then stomps back to the cage and points at the other explorer.

"You!!  Death or RooRoo?"

The explorer with a look of fear on his face yells back.  "Screw that Rooroo deal I choose death!"

The Chief turns around raising one  raising one massive paw and pronounces the sentence.

"DEATH BY ROOROO!!!"

And the crowd goes wild!

Saw the Doc today about my foot.  Not going as well as my neck another 4 to 6 weeks to completely heal.  He does say its looking good though.

Well here's a turn in my life.  Work chose to separate themselves from me today.  I've been on Long-term Disability and I will probably stay on disability until I turn 65.  I've been taking up a job slot by doing this they can fill my spot.  I've quit jobs, been laid off, fired, actually I've been fired a lot I tend to Dom everyone and a lot of my bosses have resented that.  But this is the first time I've been separated.  Makes it sound like were still married and just seeing other jobs.  LOL

Still working by on the neck but I'm able to drive again.  Walking more which makes me feel better.  Now its just a matter of time and effort to get back to where I was.

Just for the record Physical Therapy SUCKS!

Had the Eply procedure yesterday and it worked no more getting dizzy when I look around.  Hopefully I can start getting my strength back

Just got back from the neurologists office and they say my neck is healed.  Big relief.  Now I can go get an Eply procedure and see if that fixes my dizziness issues.

Well its taking awhile but I'm starting to walk again.  Still having dizzy spells and my neck is still an issue.

Broke my leg and my c3 vertebrae in my neck.  Spent the last month in the hospital.  Moving onto therapy.  We will see how it goes.

Thought I would update my profile with some new pics.  When my profile reappears you can see how handsome I am.

When I was being admitted to the hospital the nurse taking my vitals caught my attention.  Older gal quite self assured and funny.  Funny is very attractive to me.  I asked if she was married and she said no she had just divorced her husband and the decree had just come through that week.  I looked at her grinned that grin all guys have when we're propositioning a girl and asked her if she would marry me.  She looked me right in the eye and said. 

"Nope I just got rid of one deadbeat husband, I don't need another."

I was just one upped Lol.  That comment just made my year.

Morning,

Noticed that journals were working again.

Seems to be slot less people here since covid.

Covid came extremely close to killing me.  I'll bear the marks till my dying day.  If ever i should live that long.

This is from a Daddy/dom viewpoint.

1) She is not alloweed to put herself down.  If I think she is worth my time I require that she thinks so as well.

2) No swearing.  I expect her to behave like a lady

3) 8 hours of sleep.  I require that she gets enough rest.  I prefer a 9 pm bedtime but thats not always feasible on the hours I live

4) Balanced diet.  I actually like bigger girls but I require that mine eats well.  Healthy mind-healthy body etc.

5) Respect, I require that she Sir or ma'am's everyone.  Regaurdless of age.  (Old Sensi of mine taught me that and I do it as well)

Some things you just have to share.  Met a cute little thing today.  Her parents actually named her Bunny.  Thought I was going to die laughing.

Seems I managed to rip a tendon in my ankle... well off my ankle.  Looks like I will be spending a few years on a cane.  I am really starting to appreciate that country song.  "I ain't as good as I once was"

Sigh

Met a nice girl here a few days ago.  Seemed like a nice kid.  Wish I could have helped her more.

Well that was a spectacular failure.  She was good to go right up until it was time to go then got cold feet.  Back to looking .   Sigh

Going to get her 10/10

WOOHOO!!

Ok starting to de-arm my house.  My place is decorated in early Terran Arsenal and that just won't due.  She has a young son and I am pretty sure he does not need to play with all my dangerous junk.  Well it may be more than that.  She tells me I'm a lover not a fighter.  I was surprised to realise that since I met her this statement is true. 

Spent the weekend in the arms of a very special girl.  I am done searching I have found what I am looking for.  Was sick as a dog (hayfever) and still had a wonderful time.

Things are going rather well.  Heading out and the beginning of next month to find out if my search is over.

Removed the actively seeking from my profile tonight.  I will look in from time to time, but I may not be on here often.

Hey guys,

Been awhile since I have thought about this place.  Had a real scare with my dad so I was sleeping on the floor over there for awhile. 

But thats not the real reason I haven't been here.  Been talking with a brat I met here.  I am totally infatuated with her.  She is kool with my situation.  I rather think she will enjoy being looked after by my folks as well. 

Stay tuned for more updates!

Happy Independance Day...

HMMMMM...

Enjoy your day of Freedom....

Hmmmmm...

Happy Independance Day if your Canadian...

Hmmmm...

Happy Fourth of July...

YES thats it thats the one

HAPPY FOURTH OF JULY!!!

Got a call from a girl I was interested in awhile ago.  Asked me to come over and sort out a Dom.  She works at a hospital and the guys slave was giving birth.  He had the girl pierced and chained shut.  Now I can see this as fairly interesting but I doubt I will ever understand why he refused to unchain her for the birth. 

There are alot of quality people in this lifestyle.  But all it takes is one moron to give us all a bad name.

Had an experience tonight.  Was out with a buddy, we'd had our fun and were sitting on the tailgate of his truck kind of chatting back and forth with a group two cars over.  They break up and all leave and one of the girls comes over with a bottle of wild turkey asking us if we wanted it.  We started off saying no just put it in your trunk and drive home. She tells us she can't do that as she is under 21.  So we take the bottle.  She tells us the stuff is okay as she drank most of it.  She then climbs into her car to drive off.  We moved around to talk to her through the drivers window and verified that she was drunk and intending to drive.  She was.

We put an end to that plan and I drove her home and my buddy followed.  Not sure what bothers me more.  Her blatant disregard for other people or me not waking up her folks.

Always makes me wonder when I see some guy has viewed my profile.

Seems I am still looking.