The loss of control comes when I admit holding it is useless because I will use the diaper sooner or later.
The rush of humiliation comes when my bladder lets go and the warm wet rush makes my diaper swell and bulge.
The arousal comes when the diaper is bulging against my pussy, its abrasive wetness rubbing my clit as I waddle submissively in my diaper.
I ache to close my legs and rub myself, but the thickening of my wet diapers between my legs prevents me, constantly reminding me of my enslavement, reminding me that I am not allowed.
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