I'm feeling lucky since I found a pack of sea monkeys in the bottom of my Cracker Jack box. I think it was a sign to try real time. Don't worry, I'm totally qualified. I learned everything I know about being a dominatrix by memorizing the works of E.L. James and watching Exit From Eden-- two very reliable sources, in my opinion.
I wish I had a big enough vocabulary to demand that you read every word of my really long profile so that you could 'pass a test' by revealing the hidden words. Does that really work? Is it as exciting as finding a pack of sea monkeys in your Cracker Jacks? The world may never know.
Do you derive joy when someone else succeeds? Do you not play dirty when engaged in competition? Do you have a big intellectual capacity but know that it alone does not equate wisdom? Do you see everything as an illusion but enjoy it even though you are not of it? Are you both masculine and feminine? Politically aware and don't believe in capital punishment? If so, you might be a perfect match for Alanis Morissette. Extra points if you dig poutine.
I hope you don't mind that I have a little case of narcissistic personality disorder. My doctor says it's incurable but I think she has an inflated sense of self-importance. At my support group, all they want to do is talk about themselves. Booorrrriiinnngggg.
12/2/2017 6:42:36 PM
Did you hear about the theme park ride made entirely out of iron? It was a ferrous wheel.
12/2/2017 6:31:26 PM
A man walks into a psychiatrist’s office wearing only shorts made of plastic wrap. The shrink says, “Well, I can clearly see you’re nuts.”
12/2/2017 6:30:03 PM
Corduroy pillows are making headlines.
11/28/2017 10:55:03 AM
I'm actually not funny. I'm just mean and people think I'm joking.
11/28/2017 10:52:58 AM
Maybe I should eat some make-up so I can be pretty on the inside too.
